"Adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them." - Dr. Seuss
Sakura runs away from school on Wednesdays. Everyone knows it's coming, and yet to the befuddlement of all but one, she manages to evade Iruka regardless. (Iruka is vexed by this, but privately acknowledges that if Sakura is capable of outmaneuvering a chunin, she doesn't really need to attend the Academy anyway.) Most would agree that graduating the young girl early would be the best solution, but unfortunately, without the backing of a clan to push the issue, Sakura is fresh out of luck. So she remains in the Academy, and tries to escape every Wednesday without fail.
More than once, Sakura has been asked why she only plans her escapades for Wednesdays. Wouldn't it be better if she didn't have such an obvious pattern? In response, Sakura tells them that it adds to the challenge. (In reality, her reasons are more complex than that, but every magician must have her secrets.)
This Wednesday, Sakura has gotten farther along than usual. After jumping out the window in the middle of a math lecture, running up the Academy wall, and then hopping from roof to roof only to vanish into the afternoon-market crowds, Sakura finds herself weaving between gossiping ladies and keeping an eye out for Iruka. Normally, she would have memorized the general placements of objects and people on the street, as she has done for each place she escapes to, but sadly this is new, untread territory and Sakura hasn't created an accurate mental map.
Oh well, it will be a learning experience until she can return next week.
Ducking her head, Sakura pulls down the brim of her new, stolen green sun-hat, glancing surreptitiously from side to side in search of a spiky brown ponytail. When she sees none, she picks up her pace, aiming for the gap between a vegetable vendor and a fruit vendor that looks like a viable place to take to the rooftops once more. Scurrying between the two outdoor shops, Sakura hits a literal stop-gap when she finds a dead-end alley. Normally, she would just use chakra to climb up the wall and move onwards, but the rooftops of these particular buildings have an overhang, meaning Sakura will have to walk upside-down to get past them. Sakura doesn't know if her chakra control is quite good enough for that stunt yet.
Shrugging, she decides to try anyway. Sakura makes it about half a step forward before a strong hand clamps down on her shoulder. With a gulp, Sakura feels herself get spun around to face a menacing looking Iruka.
"Hey, sensei," she says nervously, attempting to remain casual. "The weather's really nice today, right?"
Iruka looms over her. "Indeed it is," he agrees, voice deceptively calm. "Want to explain why you felt the need to interrupt my lecture ?" he demands darkly.
Sakura chuckles lightly, focusing her eyes anywhere but Iruka's face. "Well, y'know sensei, life is too short to be wasted. I want to spend my childhood enjoying the simple things, like a nice spring day. We all have such limited amounts of time in this world, shouldn't we enjoy them while we can?" she asks philosophically.
Iruka's eyes narrow into slits. "Education is an investment in your future, and therefore more worthy time spent," he responds, reaching down to grip Sakura's wrist with white knuckles. The last time they had this conversation, Sakura managed to vanish half-way through, and Iruka has learned to keep a tight grip on the pinkette.
"But is it education if you already know everything?" Sakura inquires with a vapid smile.
That smile drops when Iruka glances down at her, expression so flat and unamused that Sakura actually shivers. "Sakura Haruno," he intones, and Sakura swallows fearfully. "Be silent."
Iruka then enjoys a quiet walk back to the Academy with a very meek student in tow, free of any smartassery or clever comebacks. Although Iruka appreciates intelligence in his students, he doesn't enjoy when its weaponized against him. Especially if it interrupts class time. (For her part, Sakura wonders why Iruka is overreacting. Hasn't he had enough practice handling the frustration of her escaping? Does she need to do it more often to help him adapt?)
On Thursday, Sakura sits sulkily at her desk in the back of the classroom, arms crossed and pouting furiously. Her parents had decided to reenact the Sweets Ban that had ended several weeks ago, and Sakura was already missing her lollipops and dango. What is life without sugar-filled foods? she wonders. Surely living in a world as cruel as this isn't worth it. Iruka continually tosses her glares to make sure she is paying attention as he repeats yesterday's subject matter, but Sakura prefers to spend her time pondering life's important questions, like the connection between sweets and existentialism.
When the lunch break finally begins, Sakura pulls out a pink bento box. As soon as she opens the container, she wrinkles her nose in distaste. Her mother has apparently decided to punish her further, packing Sakura's lunch with only rice and cooked spinach. Sakura despises cooked spinach. With a grumpy huff, the pinkette carefully removes the divider holding the pile of green lumps. Pinching her nose shut and leaning away from the gross abomination, she opens up the window and dumps the food outside. She then quickly slams the window shut, tucking the plastic divider back in the bento box. Sakura will just pretend to have eaten the evil creation and complain to her mother later.
Sitting down over her hopefully uncontaminated rice, Sakura claps her hands together and cheers, "Thanks for the meal!" She stuffs about two thirds of the rice into her mouth with her first bite before being interrupted.
"You're Sakura Haruno, right?" A boy's voice cuts in. Sakura lifts her head to see Sasuke Uchiha standing in front of her desk, blue-wrapped bento in hand. His eyes are fixed on her face with single-minded concentration, and self-consciously Sakura reaches up to wipe away the rice grains sticking to the corners of her mouth.
Sakura swallows and smiles at Sasuke shyly. She isn't good at this whole people-talky thing. "Uh, yep, that's me," she answers nervously.
Sasuke drops his bento on the desk and slides into the seat beside her. Sakura has a small heart-attack, staring at the boy like he's insane and feeling the hateful eyes of Sasuke's fangirls burrowing into her. She breaks into a cold sweat.
"You tried to escape from class again yesterday, right?" Sasuke asks without looking at her, focused on unwrapping his bento.
"... Yeeess?" Sakura confirms, glancing at Sasuke in confusion and dragging out her response awkwardly. She gets an annoyed glare for her efforts.
Sasuke stares Sakura down resolutely. "I want in," he declares. "Next Wednesday, I'm coming with you." He clenches his fists at his sides, expression determined.
Sakura's eyes widen. "Uh, no you're not," she shoots Sasuke down immediately, and when his face darkens, she continues, "I don't know what your abilities are, how well you can work with me, I can't set up a communication system that quickly, and all of my plans are for one person." As Sakura speaks, she thinks of more and more reasons that Sasuke joining her is a bad idea, and continues to explain them. "You also don't know how to chakra walk, I don't have disguises for you, if we both escape together sensei will take chase faster, you sit in the middle of the classroom and that'll make leaving more difficult-"
"I'll sit next to you from now on, and you can show me chakra walking after school," Sasuke interjects, and when Sakura opens her mouth to protest, Sasuke opens his bento box. Inside is a dango skewer, and Sakura's mouth waters at the delectable, forbidden treat. "I don't like sweets, so you can have mine if you agree," he adds with a smirk. (Sasuke had done his research before confronting Sakura, and his brother had been surprisingly helpful at obtaining gourmet dango, even if he didn't know exactly why Sasuke wanted it.)
Sakura looks at Sasuke suspiciously. "For how long?" she demands, because as much as she enjoys sweets, she isn't willing to share her only entertainment for a single dango skewer. She doesn't need to bargain anyways, since she could just steal the dango from him if she really wanted to.
"Every. Single. Day," Sasuke emphasizes, and he pushes the bento forward just a bit. The aroma wafts up towards Sakura's nose, and she leans forward compulsively. Is that gourmet dango? she thinks eagerly, hand reaching out for a try. Sasuke yanks the bento back and shuts it before Sakura can grab the sweet treat, and stares her down with a smirk. "Deal?" he inquires, clearly confident about her response.
Reluctantly, Sakura nods her head. "Deal," she agrees. "But we'll need to wait two weeks instead. There's no way I'll have a new system ready for two people in a week, plus you need time to master chakra walking." Sasuke's smirk widens, and he opens up the bento box to hand Sakura the dango. Before he can, two pale hands snatch the treat up first. Sasuke turns with a deadpan expression to see Sakura already stuffing her face with the sweetened dumplings. "Thisf isf goo'!" she snarfs excitedly, green eyes alight. "'Ere 'ouf ge' i'?"
"Not telling," Sasuke says resolutely, picking up his chopsticks and starting to eat his own lunch. He's slightly disgusted by Sakura's manners, but steels himself. He'll be spending plenty of time with her from now on, after all. (Sasuke heard his father mention Sakura at dinner last week, a small comment about the Academy student who lead her teacher on a chase around the village. It's more than Sasuke has ever gotten from his father. If his chopsticks snap in his hand at the memory, Sakura is too busy enjoying her dango to notice.)
(Ha. Even if she's only nine, Sakura misses nothing. Understanding is another matter though, so she writes Sasuke's odd behavior off as an anger-management problem. She isn't entirely wrong.)
A few hours later, school finally ends, and Sakura is released from her prison. As soon as Iruka declares class over, Sakura rockets out the window into the Academy training yards, jaw set determinedly. She has a lot of work ahead of her, reframing all of her plans for two people and teaching Sasuke to be useful. Darting into the very back of the training areas, where the trees and kunai targets for the older students are located, Sakura drops her backpack under a tree and patiently waits.
Moments after her, Sasuke appears, his own backpack slung over his shoulder. Sakura is momentarily surprised by his speed, since Sasuke isn't using chakra to boost himself, but then her lips turn down at the corners. Currently, Sakura is the fastest, strongest student in the class because she can make her chakra amplify her muscles. If she helps Sasuke learn how to do the same, he will eventually outpace her. It's a juvenile thought, but Sakura is a child anyways. She has a good excuse.
"So, Uchiha-kun, do you think you're ready?" Sakura asks. She doesn't really care about his response, but it seems as good a conversation starter as any, especially since Sakura plans to spend the rest of the afternoon criticizing Sasuke's skills before running home.
Sasuke drops his backpack next to hers. "Yeah," he confirms with a smirk, and he has just enough arrogance in his force to irk Sakura.
The pinkette takes a moment to hide her own smirk, and then says sweetly, "Okay." Sakura turns around to the tree where her backpack is, hands folded behind her back in a show of casualness, and calmly strolls up the side of the tree. She walks up the tree, and then atop of a branch, taking the time to avoid walking upside-down since that's still beyond her capabilities. When Sakura finally glances down, she catches a glimpse of Sasuke's wide eyes seconds before he corrects himself stiffly. Sakura smiles, knowing that the next hour is going to be fun. "This is chakra walking, Uchiha-kun," she informs him, sitting down on the branch and kicking out her legs playfully. "You move your chakra to the soles of your feet, and by keeping a constant output molded to the bark, you can defy gravity. If you get better at it, you can even walk upside down, or use your chakra to enhance your muscles," Sakura explains.
Sasuke nods stonily, clearly daunted by the new challenge but refusing to show it. "Alright," he says. "I start immediately then?"
Sakura covers her too-wide grin with her hand. It wouldn't do for Sasuke to become suspicious before she can laugh at him, after all. "Yep," she says a little too quickly. Sasuke glances up at her oddly, intuition telling him something wasn't quite right, but in the end runs forward anyway.
He makes is about half a step up the trunk before getting blasted away. The bark explodes under his feet, and Sasuke goes flying back, rolling head over heels until he's approximately five feet away from the tree. When he finally stops, spreadeagled on the ground with wide eyes and covered in dirt, Sakura lets out a small snort. She's trying so hard to hold her breath and her entire body shakes from the force of her suppressed giggles.
Sasuke silently climbs to his feet, attempting to retain his dignity whil dusting himself off. When he notices Sakura's rapidly purpling face, his expression darkens. "What're you laughing for?" he demands, affronted.
"Y-you idiot!" Sakura bursts out, throwing her head back and cackling.
Sasuke stares at Sakura in astoundment as she laughs at him . Sasuke has never been called stupid before. His teachers have always complimented his skills, always told him what a great ninja he would become. Sasuke bites his lip, feeling his face start to heat up in embarrassment as Sakura continues to laugh. He prepares to leave, unwilling to endure this humiliation any longer, when Sakura drops down to the ground and grabs his wrist. "Uchiha-kun," she begins breathlessly, pulling him back towards the tree. "Move some chakra into your palm and press it against the tree," Sakura orders him, lifting Sasuke's hand for him.
Sasuke glares at her, offended, but allows her to place his hand against the tree trunk. Still angry, Sasuke quickly pumps some chakra into his palm. The bark instantly bursts under his hand, and Sasuke's eyes widen at the resulting explosion.
"You're adding way too much," Sakura tells him, pressing her own palm against the tree trunk against his. Then, she lifts her hand away, and presses her palm against his face. Sasuke recoils immediately, but not before he feels the chakra humming along his skin. "That's about how much you want to be using," Sakura adds helpfully. "I touched your face because typically that's the most chakra-sensitive body-part."
Sasuke huffs, but nods in acceptance. He frowns at the tree, and then presses his hand against the tree again. This time, it doesn't explode, but when he pulls away he doesn't feel the same stickiness as before. "Not enough," he mutters to himself, staring at his hand thoughtfully and flexing his fingers.
Sakura reaches out and grabs his wrist. Sasuke flinches, and then feels her chakra once again brush against his skin, except this time it's more forceful, pushy and pressurized. His hand tingles uncomfortably, but Sakura just uses her hold on his wrist to force Sasuke's hand against the tree. As soon as his palm makes contact with the tree, Sasuke feels Sakura's chakra graft to the bark perfectly, molding along his skin. "Like that," Sakura instructs. "Foreign chakra is more easy to observe, can you feel what my chakra is doing?" she inquires.
"Yes," Sasuke says, more focused on the way he can feel her chakra fluctuating against his skin. Sasuke quickly shakes her hand off of his wrist, adding irritably, "Let me try on my own."
With a smile small, Sakura acquiesces, relinquishing her grip on Sasuke's wrist. She watches him test his control one more time, before turning around and grabbing her backpack. She pulls out a notebook and pencil, and then sits several feet away from the tree Sasuke is using, out of range of any flying wood-shards. She has planning to do.
A few seconds later, Sasuke lets out a frustrated hiss as the tree bark crumples under his palm. Sakura smirks, and then her eyes widen with a new idea.
The next week, Iruka spends the entirety of Wednesday eyeing Sakura suspiciously. When lunchtime passes and the pinkette still hasn't made any escape attempts, she gains more than a few odd looks. When the class ends and Sakura is still present, Iruka pokes her with his ruler, just to make sure the young girl hadn't managed to replace herself with a clone without him noticing. Sakura sticks her tongue out at her teacher and heads home, head held high and deeply amused.
Most educational professionals would consider this progress. Sakura hadn't attempted to run away from school, this meant she was maturing. Iruka knew better. He had been forced to chase Sakura down every week for months, and if he knew anything about his student, he knew she was very, very stubborn and very, very smart. As a result, Iruka developed a small twitch over the rest of the week, which worsened with every passing day Sakura refused to make a bid for freedom.
While walking Sasuke home Friday, Sakura sniggers about how paranoid Iruka was becoming. If she had known how amusing his reaction would be to her deviating from her normal pattern, she would've done it sooner. Or not, because the academy was hell and Sakura was becoming twitchy as well.
When the second Wednesday finally rolls around, Sakura and Sasuke sit next to each other in the back of the class per usual. Iruka comes in five minutes before school starts, a large mug of coffee in one hand and a pile of papers in the other. Sakura stares out the window calmly, while Sasuke watches Iruka like a hawk. This is the first sign of something strange. Iruka doesn't notice, but from his desk behind them, Shikamaru does. The Nara quickly deduces the situation, and then lets out an annoyed groan, thumping his head on his desk. Sakura's antics are troublesome on their own, she doesn't need an accomplice.
Iruka lays his papers on the desk, takes a long sip of his coffee, and closes his eyes. The quiet chatter of his students still fills the air, and Iruka knows if he wants control of his classroom, he'll need to shout and get their attention. Taking a deep breath, Iruka turns around yells, "EVERYONE QUIE-" he cuts off when he notices the open window in the back of the class, and the suspiciously empty chairs that had been seating children before. Iruka's heart sank. He'd relaxed his guard, and this time not just one student had escaped, but both of his best students had abandoned ship. For a moment, his shoulders slump forward in surrender… and then the will to fight lights itself in his chest. Iruka's face turns red and swells with rage, and he bellows out his Wednesday war-cry. "HARUNO!" Iruka booms, and body-flickers out of the classroom, immediately taking chase.
As soon as their teacher vanishes, the students of the class let out a loud, rallying cheer, before snapping back to their original conversations, much louder than before. In the teachers' lounge next door, Mizuki sighs, standing up from the nice, soft couch to go watch Iruka's class until the teacher can return.
Meanwhile, Sasuke and Sakura are zipping along the rooftops side-by-side. Sasuke is keeping a constant lookout for Iruka, while Sakura scrambles to stay several steps ahead of their hunter. She has already adjusted her normal escape pathway to suit a pair of runaways instead of a solo escapist, and that means she is now on unsure ground. Normally, Sakura has the regular movements of her chosen routes timed down to the second, but when she is facing a new setting, that advantage slips away.
Catching a glimpse of the same marketplace that had stumped her two weeks ago, Sakura barks out, "Disguise 3!" before jumping down to the ground behind a stack of crates, already forming the hand-signs for a henge. Sasuke is quick to perform the jutsu as well, and Sakura pretends she isn't bitter that he manages to finish the sequence a few moments before her. Both children vanish in small puffs of smoke, and then in their places stand two older woman, wearing flowery dresses and carrying baskets stuffed to the brim with produce.
Sakura, now a brunette middle-aged woman, leads the blonde and blue eyed Sasuke (who looks eerily similar to Ino Yamanaka) out into the street, guiding them towards the same alleyway as before. "Those tomatoes were severely overpriced," Sakura gossips, trying to make their disguises more believable. "I cannot believe that man tried to sell you overly-ripe tomatoes!"
Sasuke juts his lip out in an imitation of a pout. Sakura supposes he has seen plenty of vapid female expressions from his fangirls, because his acting is surprisingly good. "I know! Can you believe him! We need to talk to someone - tell them to close down his stall! One of my friends knows that market manager, I'm sure we can ask her," Sasuke says snootily, face switching from emotion to emotion so smoothly that Sakura almost can't believe that she's talking to the same grumpy, arrogant Uchiha. "I feel so insulted. I can't believe that man tried to cheat me!"
"You should definitely do that," Sakura says reassuringly, reaching out to "comfortingly" grab Sasuke's hand. She uses that same grip to tug him to the side, leading him into the alley. As soon as they deviate from the crowd, Sasuke and Sakura drop their disguises. Facing the same overhang that had trapped her last time, Sakura tightens her fists. "Okay, hold up your hands so I can stand on them," she orders, and ignores Sasuke's put upon huff as he kneels down and offers up his palms. When Sakura steps one of her feet up, Sasuke glares at her offending foot in disgust. "Oh, shut it, you big baby," Sakura huffs, grabbing Sasuke's head and using it to turn. She balances on his hands for a moment, eyes focused on where she wants to reach. "Okay, now," she says, and Sasuke concentrates and pushing chakra into his palms like before.
The following explosion sends Sakura flying, and with a cocky grin she flips midair, feet landing lightly on the rooftop. "Nailed it!" she hoots, before spinning back around and throwing down a metal wire for Sasuke to grab on to. The Uchiha does so reluctantly, and Sakura yanks him up onto the roof as well.
"Now what?" Sasuke demands, scanning the vicinity for Iruka. He won't admit it, but this entire thing was becoming pretty exciting and - dare he say it - enjoyable.
Sakura smirks and points over the rooftops into the distance. "We'll aim for the Hokage Mountain," she declares. "If we can get to the top of that, I doubt sensei will follow." Sasuke nods in agreement, and then both children take off, darting over the rooftops as fast as they can. Sakura grins, adrenaline pumping through her veins and hair flying behind her like a pink banner. This is exhilarating!
The duo of wannabe escapists make it about three buildings forward when Iruka manages to body-flicker in front of them. Sakura, well experienced in this ensuing game, dodges left, slipping under Iruka's hand and catapulting herself over to the next rooftop. Sasuke, not so experienced, gets snatched up by the collar. A few moments later, Sakura is also dangling from Iruka's grip by the back of her shirt.
Looking remarkably like a mother-cat, Iruka jumps down from the roof, both children dangling from his grip pathetically. "What do you have to say for yourselves?" Iruka asks, despite already knowing he'd get no honest response. Or perhaps Sakura cheeky answer would be honest, it just wouldn't be serious.
"I plead insanity," Sakura says immediately, holding up her hand like she's making an oath. Sasuke glances at her like she actually is insane, so maybe it's working.
Iruka stares at the pinkette for a long, awkward moment. Then he hangs his head down and sighs. He looks to Sasuke instead. "And you?" he inquires tiredly. Sasuke raises his chin defiantly, crossing his arms and looking away. Sakura crosses her arms and turns her head as well in a show of solidarity. Iruka looks between the two "pouting" children. "This is going to be a repeated occurence, isn't it?" he predicts, and although neither child answers, the smirk that spreads across Sakura's face says it all. Iruka sighs again.
He seems to be doing that a lot lately.
I have also posted this story on Archive Of Our Own under the username "Bleunox". Thank you to the anonymous reviewer who pointed out I hadn't mentioned it!