"Take me back into the arms I love

Need me like you did before

Touch me once again

And remember when

There was no one that you wanted more

Don't go you know you'll break my heart

She won't love you like I will

I'm the one who'll stay

When she walks away

And you know I'll be standing here still."

AN: This took forever to write because 1.) Im not that talented and 2.) I gave myself a lot of feels.

He knew. What now? She stared him up and down. He was smiling at her. Odd. Very odd.

It has been a few weeks since Jerry's death and it has been hard. Even more so for Fitz who had to deal with the fact that Olivia's mother was the one who killed his son and now Olivia was no where to be found. He spent a great deal of the first week looking worried, upset, overwhelmed and just sad. But he didn't drink. Not one sip.

She looked over to where he was sitting on the floor in the Oval office, surrounded by a ton of papers. He had called her in to help on a new campaign strategy to help his election. Their son's death had the American public rallying behind him but they still had a lot of work to do.

Her heels were laying on the floor, alongside her jacket & her hair was pulled into a ponytail two hours into it. She was tired and the skirt and stocking she was wearing had become very uncomfortable. She stood up to leave.

"Well...I'm going to call it a night. We can keep this up tomorrow." She pulled herself up and noticed his hold on the edge of her skirt.

"But we have so much work to do. A couple more hours and you can go." He looked up at her.

He wanted company. She could tell. She looked into his sad eyes and softened her expression.

"I mean...you can go if you want...but I would like it if you stayed." He wasn't necessarily pleading, but there was a fine line.

Truth was, she wouldn't be able to sleep anyway. Neither of them had slept in weeks.

"Okay, I'll stay. I just have to change into something more comfortable and get something to eat."

His expression softened. "Okay, I'll come with you. I'm starving."

"Oh..okay." That took her by suprise. She took the lead.

They entered their bedroom and she headed for the closet to pick out something comfortable. He headed to the bathroom to wash his face.

All of a sudden she was debating what to wear. It was past 1AM and it was definitely bedtime but she wasn't going to bed. She was going to "work" with Fitz. A nightgown seemed too fancy for this event. Yes it was an event. They never talked anymore. This is a rare moment. She opened a drawer with sweatpants. They were fancy sweatpants that were almost never used but they were comfortable enough.

Fitz entered the room, already changed into a T-shirt and sweatpants. "You're in the same place I left you."

"Oh...well women take longer." She replied.

He shook his head. "Give me a second." He ran to his closet. He came back holding a T-shirt. He walked over to her closet and picked out a pair of pajama shorts. He didn't even know she owned those.

"Here. Less than a minute. You're welcome." He laughed.

"Well this is...interesting." It was different but she didn't hate it. She looked around waiting for him leave but he just stood there none the wiser.

"I'm gonna go change and I'll be right back." She blushed.

"Okay, hurry up. You have less than 5 minutes because I'm starving."

She rushed to the bathroom, Changed and fixed her ponytail. Less than three minutes. "I'm done!"

Fitz was staring at her legs. Very glorious legs and his shirt fit her so well.

"Come on! lets go. I thought you were hungry."

He shook it off. "Yeah hungry... lets go."

They quietly entered the kitchen.

"What do you want?" Fitz opened the fridge.

"I'll just have some fruit. It's late."

"But grilled cheese." He made a pouty face.

She looked at the clock. "It's 1:00AM. Grilled cheese?"

"Who cares? Come on, I'll make you one too. You're not gonna let me eat grilled cheese on my own right?"

She really didn't mind grilled cheese and he honestly made a very good one. she was glad he was eating. "Grilled cheese it is."

He made them grilled cheeses and put them on a plate. "Come on! We can eat in the oval."

"You wanna go eat grilled cheese in the oval?"

"Yeah why not?"

She shrugged and they headed upstairs.

They entered and placed a pillow on the floor to sit on. Mellie crossed her legs and bit into her grilled cheese. "It's delicious. 15 years later and it's still delicious." She smiled at him.

"I remembered the first time I made it for you was for that picnic we had. Yeah, and you freaked out because a lady bug ran up your leg." They laughed at the memory.

What happened to them? How did they drift so far apart?

He started thinking about Olivia. Were they going to drift away emotionally like he did with Mellie? She still hadn't called.

Mellie noticed the shift. "You miss her." She put the plate down. "You want me to try calling again?" There was no point of fighting him at this point. Olivia was a reality for them and she had to let him heal.

He really wanted to talk to her but at this point they were only hurting each other. "No. I'm fine. It's just so much happening all at once."

She inched closer and held his hand. "Fitz, it's okay. I mean it's not okay right now, but it will be."

"How did you live with...you know...for so long?"

She let out a breath. "You mean why I didn't tell you?"

"You didn't tell anyone. How did you deal with all that by yourself? You could've told me, we could've worked it out. We could've ..."

"I had no one to tell. The friends I had were back in North Carolina and I never bothered with making new friends in California because I had you. You were my best friend. So when it happened, the only person I could tell, I really couldn't tell. I was afraid of what you would've done. I was afraid of what you would think of me which Is absurd now that I think about it because it wasn't my fault but at that moment and time it seemed like the right thing to do. Everyday I woke up determined to tell you and then crumbled."

"Mellie..."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ruined us. I'm sorry I pushed you away. I'm sorry I made it so hard to love me. I didn't want you to love me because I didn't think I deserved it. I'm so sorry you lost your wife."

He pulled her in to embrace her. "No, no. It doesn't matter now. I get it. I'm sorry for not being there for you. For not being more observant. I'm really sorry."

"I tried to get through it by myself. I tried to heal by myself and when I finally stopped having nightmares, when I was ready to be your wife again it was too late."

He could hear her muffled cries. He cupped her face & kissed her forehead. They looked at each other for a moment. The naked truth was out now and they were both trying to heal.

Fitz moved in to kiss her but she pulled away.

"No. You're hurt, I'm a mess. I don't need your pity."

"It's not pity. You're my wife." He kissed her hard. All those missed moments.

She kissed him back, ran her hand through his hair and then ran her hands up and down his chest. Ugh. She missed this. She missed him.

She finally pulled away. "Fitz, please take a moment to think...to breathe." She didn't want to ruin the moment but she was tired of scraps. "You love Olivia." She cringed, subtly.

"She left. She's starting a new life. She's not here. You are."

Mellie stood up and fixed herself up. "That doesn't mean you are ready for us. It doesn't mean we are okay. That doesn't mean you can have me and then toss me aside when she decides to come back." She walked towards the desk.

"I won't toss you aside. It's you and me."

She remembered him saying those exact words to her in the same room a while back. "Fitz, do not say things like that. You don't mean it. We should just go to bed."

"I mean it this time. Through it all you're the only one who has been by my side no matter what. You're the only one who has loved me unconditionally and it's time I took care of what I have." He walked up to her and pulled her into him by the waist.

"Fitz..." Before she could let out another word he kissed her and she let him.

Before they could think about what they were actually doing, he lifted her on top of the desk. He kept his hand firmly on her thighs.

He could hear her not so quiet moans. Ugh. He let out a breath as he removed her T-shirt.

"I thought you liked that T-shirt on me." She joked.

"It looks better on the floor. This view is a lot nicer." He shamelessly cupped her breasts.

"well it's only fair if you took yours off too." She removed his shirt and ran her hands up and down his chest. His physique has always amazed her. She kissed his chest.

"We're still over dressed." He lifted her off the table with one hand and removed her pajamas shorts with the other.

Mellie was a beautiful woman. He always knew that. He didn't always appreciate it but he always knew.

She wrapped her legs around his waist and her hands around his neck.

They both stopped talking. It wasn't soft. It wasn't polite. Fitz moved his body over hers to unceremoniously removed everything from the desk. The wood felt hard on her back but she didn't mind. The weight of his body on top of her felt right.

Clothes were flying, and emotions were high. his hands sends a thrilling sensation which drives her insane. It was all very raw, very open. As if this was their first time.

Neither knew where everything was headed but it didn't matter. For a few hours, it didn't matter. It was just the two of them and an insanely useful desk.

AN: Pretty much an one-shot, but I change my mind all the time so who knows. thoughts? x