Disclaima (of doom): I own neither FMA, Death Note, nor the Wizard of Earth Sea. All of which are awesome.

Edward was hang gliding for no apparent reason, when he noticed a rectangular black spot on the ground far beneath him. 'Well,' he thought OOC-ly, 'can't let a black spot go unspotted!'

He blew up the hang glider and fell into a tree. After untangling himself from the…tree… he ran over to the black… book… thingy. Wow, I'm running out of brain to put words in. Oh, well. The! Important thing was that he ran over to the book! And guess what, he picked it up! GASP. Anyways, he picked it up and glared at it.

"I don't like you." he said.

The book said nothing.

"I don't like you." he repeated.

The book said nothing.

"DAMN YOU BOOK!"

He flipped the book over and read the words on the front.

"Death note, eh? Mwahahahahaha! Now I have power over you! Because the name's the thing." OMFG, ED READ THE WIZARD OF EARTH SEA! I need to read that some time… Hmm… Anyway, he decided he wanted to keep this 'Death note' thingymajigger.

"So… Death note… What do you do?" he asked the book.

"I-" WAIT, BOOKS DON'T TALK! SILENCE MAGICAL TALKING DEATH NOTE!

And then the notebook said nothing. Ed shrugged and flipped open the front cover of the book.

"Congratulations, idiot, you just opened a book," he recited. "HEY! Oh well… 'One, The human whose name is written in this note shall die. Two, This note will not take effect unless the writer has the subject's face in their mind when writing his/her name. Therefore, people sharing the same name will not be affected. Three, if the cause of death is written within 40 seconds of writing the subject's name, it will happen. Four, if the cause of death is not specified, the subject will simply die of a heart attack. Five, after writing the cause of death, the details of the death should be written in the next 6 minutes and 40 seconds.' Hm. Neato!" he grinned. He popped a pen he had for some reason (I mean, come on, he was hang gliding!) and touched it to the paper.

"Colonel… Airhead…" he wrote. But for some unknown reason, Roy didn't die. "Oh well!" he said. He thought for several seconds (I knew it couldn't last) before scribbling another name in the book. "En… vy…" he dictated.

Long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away… Wait, scratch that. Just long, long ago…

Little blonde Evan Hoenheim was bored. So! Being the incredible person that he –cough- was, he wandered into a room where his Daddy was experimenting with stuffs. His Daddy wasn't there at the moment, so he stuck a vial of mercury into his mouth. Yum! I did that once! Anyway, he did just that, and so, little Evan Hoenheim alas, was no more. And, overcome by grief, Hoenheim tried to bring him back to life, and bad stuff happened. It's Ed's fault! HE BROUGHT THIS UPON HIMSELF! And so, Envy was born. Mwahahaha… My sister should thank Ed some time…

So! Whaddaya think? Will you review, will you? Please? I love Death Note sooo much… But this is going to disobey the rules of the book so much… Mwahaha… Please just review! I welcome flames!