I do not own FMA, Detective Conan, or their characters. This was written for the Royai community challenge. Themes are listed at the end of the fic. AU.
These Days
She stretched slightly, eyes still closed, trying to figure out what had woken her. After a few moments of wriggling around, Riza realized it was the lack of another body that had disturbed her. She slipped out of the bed, taking her revolver from the nightstand drawer before pulling on her robe. Silently, she slipped down the hall. There was no reason to panic yet. There was a perfectly logical reason for the other side of her bed to be empty at this hour.
Down the hall, there was a door left open. She peeked inside to find moonlight streaming in through the open curtains, illuminating the figures in the battered old rocking chair. She slid the gun in to her robe pocket. All was right in her world. She entered the room and sat herself at the foot of the chair. Her husband reached a hand down to stroke her hair.
"I didn't mean to wake you."
"I'm not used to sleeping alone anymore."
"Ah."
Silence fell between them broken only by the soft creak of the rocking chair. Moments like these were precious. After what she'd seen in the war, Riza wasn't sure she believed in any sort of benevolent deity, but these moments of peace and contentment with her husband and daughter almost seemed sacred. It was strange to think of herself with a husband and a daughter. Two years ago, she would not have believed this could be a reality. Two years ago she had given up on anything but surviving the day.
"Evil often triumphs, but never conquers." - Joseph Roux
Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye was exhausted. She'd spent the last two years working undercover for British Intelligence in France. The war was finally over, but that did nothing for her. She still had nightmares. The truth of the matter was now she had the time to have nightmares. Her reassignment hadn't helped. She had been serving under the same commanding officer since she had begun serving during the war. Colonel Roy Mustang was many things, including arrogant and a flirt, but he had always treated her professionally and with confidence in her ability as a military officer. That had been enough for her to respect him from the start, and once she'd gotten to know the man behind the masks he wore, she had found someone she would go through hell for.
Her new commanding officer saw her as a glorified secretary. Actually, Lt. Colonel Frank Archer saw her as his personal slave, there to take care of anything he needed, and apparently, he thought he needed a quick lay, and that she was the person to provide it. He was out of luck. She had put up with a lot from the Nazis to get the information they needed, but she had never once had to sell herself to get it, and she wasn't about to start now. But it did make her working environment less than pleasant.
She would have preferred to be out in the field assisting Colonel Mustang, who was currently working with the French to put their country back together. Unfortunately now that the war was over, the higher ups had once again decided to keep women out of the fieldwork. So she was stuck here. Well, the truth of the matter was she could leave at any time. Her grandfather had also been a military officer. She had originally been following in his footsteps when she'd signed up. He'd left Riza his entire life's savings and his residence in Wales when he'd died. If she wanted to, she could leave the military and live quite comfortably on that.
The problem was she wasn't sure she wanted to leave the military. She had reasons for staying, but then at this point, she almost had as many reasons for leaving. She was exhausted; the war had taken its toll on her physically, mentally, and emotionally. She did not want to have to kill again, ever. She was no longer in a position where she could actually help people. Her working environment was making her miserable. But then on the other hand, the military had been her home most of her adult life, and it had given her the opportunity to do so much good. The war had forced her to kill people, but she had also been able to save people due to her position in the military. And Colonel Mustang was in the military.
The truth of the matter was that she had managed to fall in love with her former commanding officer, and it was the main thing that kept her here. She had been so looking forward to working with him full time again when she got back from France. She had no idea about his feelings on the matter. She knew he respected and trusted her, but other than that she had no clue. But that was enough for her if she could simply be around him. He had become her touchstone. No matter what atrocities she'd seen, she could still have faith in humanity thanks to him. The military was a link between them, and one she was loath to give up. Oh, but there were days when she would.
"Riza, fetch me another coffee. That's a good girl."
Her face betrayed none of her irritation or fury. Her colonel had barely ever used her first name. It was always "Hawkeye" or "Lieutenant". She could count on one hand the times he'd used her first name, and half of them had been in conjunction with either her rank or her last name. She had never brought him coffee either. Well, that wasn't quite true. She had brought him coffee once in the time she'd worked in the office with him. His reaction had been immediate concern. Granted she had been worried about him due to some comments he'd made to a general earlier, but that was no reason to jump all over her for bringing him coffee.
"I'm an administrative assistant, sir. Fetching coffee is not among my duties." She rose from her desk with a pile of folders in her arms. "I'm taking these down to records. I expect you to have the next set finished when I return."
She turned towards the door only to find herself pinned against her desk.
"I've been very patient with you, Riza. I'm getting tired of waiting."
You could not be a single, good looking woman in occupied France without learning a thing or two about getting out of these situations. Within moments, Archer was on the floor, and she was reaching into her desk for a piece of paper she had never planned to use. She dropped on top of the Lt. Colonel before removing a second from her desk.
"That is your copy of my resignation. I'm delivering the second copy to General Haruko now. I will be back in five minutes to clean out my desk."
The walk down the hallway gave her enough time realize what she had done. She didn't turn around though. She wasn't going to run away from this decision. She had had enough. Apparently, the general wasn't too surprised. It seemed he had been expecting her to demand a transfer for some time now. The resignation threw him slightly, but he already had most of the arrangements to replace her made.
"I'm sorry that we're losing you, Hawkeye. You're a damn fine operative. I have to admit, what with the war being over, that you wouldn't be getting the type of assignments that best fit your skills, so perhaps it's all for the best."
The walk back to the office allowed her to prepare for what was sure to be an unpleasant experience. Thankfully, there were very few personal belongings in her desk at this point. A few photos, extra ammunition for her guns, a spare gun, and a paperback copy of Pride and Prejudice should be it, and all of that would fit in her handbag. She could give notice to her landlady tonight, and by the time her month's rent was up, she'd be ready to move to the house in Wales.
Steeling herself, Riza turned the knob only to be greeted by shouting.
"…so you helped us out somewhat. You people couldn't even keep your own country out of Nazi hands, let alone getting out of them without outside help. It's not British Intelligence's job to reunite a minion who served a purpose at one time with a military officer she met once. Go back to your own country where you belong."
She recognized the young brunette woman standing in front of Archer's desk. Kazuha Toyama was a young Frenchwoman who had smuggled Jews and intelligence out of France during the entire war. Riza had been her contact in British Intelligence for the last two years of the war. During that last year, Kazuha had sheltered and then smuggled a RAF pilot who had been shot down out of the country with Riza's help. It had been obvious that during their week together the two had gotten rather close. Apparently, Kazuha had come to Britain to find him again.
With a sigh, the lieutenant shut the last of her desk drawers and picked up her handbag. She walked over to Archer's desk where he looked like he was about to continue his tirade.
"General Haruko will send you a replacement for me tomorrow morning, sir. Kazuha, I haven't seen you in months. Let me buy you lunch. We'll catch up."
Riza led the way out of the building and down the street to the small pub she usually ate lunch at these days. Over fish and chips the two women caught up with each other's recent events. Apparently, Kazuha had recently moved to England permanently.
"There's just nothing left for me back there. I finally got confirmation on the fact that my father's dead. I was right about him dying shortly after the occupation. I just couldn't stay in that house anymore. Besides, there was no way I could have run the farm by myself. It was easier to hand it over to a family who actually needed it and then try and start a new life for myself. I was hoping to be able to get in contact with Heiji, but I haven't had any luck yet." She sighed. "I know we only knew each other for one week, but it really felt like we had a connection between us. Maybe I'm being silly chasing this, but the truth of the matter is it's about all I have to hang on to."
Riza smiled. "I can understand that. Are you living here in London?"
"For now. I haven't been able to find a job yet, and honestly, I'm really not that fond of being around so many people. I lived in the countryside for most of my life, so this is quite a change."
Riza bit her lip, thinking. "It's not much, but I can offer you room and board for help with cooking and cleaning at my house in Wales. I just resigned my commission. I don't know what else needs to be done, so we can negotiate pay for anything else later. Would you be interested?"
Kazuha's green eyes narrowed. "Room and board? I think you have deal. I have a few questions though. How many would I be cooking for and how big is this place?"
"I think it would just be the two of us. None of the staff stayed once the war started, and maintaining a home I wasn't living in wasn't high on my list of priorities. Honestly, I don't really remember the place. I haven't been there since I was twelve. There's room enough for a fairly large family, but that's about all I remember."
"One last question, when do I start?"
"I wasn't planning on heading up there for another two weeks as I need to pack up my apartment, but there's no reason you can't go whenever you're ready and get a head start on moving in. If you don't mind getting the place opened up and the kitchen stocked, I'll send you up there with the keys and some money later this week."
"That sounds fine to me. I can head up on Friday if you'd like."
They parted ways an hour later after finalizing plans. Riza was beginning to wonder if she was a little bit crazy. She had just quit the job that had been her life, and now she had just committed herself to making some sort of life in a place she hadn't visited since she was twelve. This wasn't like her at all. Still, she couldn't change things now, so she might as well make the best of them. Besides, she had always loved visiting Wales as a child. Maybe it was where she was meant to be right now.
She saw Kazuha off from King's Cross on Friday. She ran into the puppy on her way home. Actually, she had literally tripped over the puppy. The black and white pup then tried to attack her shoes and ended up tripping over itself. It was adorable really. When she couldn't find its owner, Riza, still being in the mild state of insanity from earlier in the week, decided to take it home with her. The next week when she left for Wales, the puppy was with her, now with a collar and the name Black Hayate.
The house was bigger than she had remembered. It had been built back when it was typical for well to do family to have five to six children as well as servants. She sighed. Two women and a dog were not going to fill this house. Yes, they would be perfectly fine living there, but the house was going to feel too large for them. Kazuha had gotten a few of the bedrooms aired out and the kitchen cleaned up before Riza had arrived.
"Everything is in fairly good condition, just rather dusty. I figure between the two of us, in another week or so, the entire place will be livable, and then we can start on the grounds. I aired out the master bedroom for you to use. I took one of the smaller ones on the third floor. The kitchen is pretty much stocked for the rest of the week."
"Thanks, Kazuha. I appreciate it."
"Not a problem. I'll let you get settled in."
Riza opened the door and looked around her room. Master suite would have been a better description as there was both a bathroom, closet, and sitting room attached. The giant four posted bed looked incredibly inviting right now. She sighed again and dropped her suitcase onto the bed. She should really take a look around the house and grounds. She'd unpack, take a look around, and then take a quick nap before supper.
Hayate enjoyed their walk around the grounds, especially sticking his nose into everything. Things were badly overgrown unfortunately. Riza thought that she and Kazuha could manage clearing out and replanting the kitchen garden, but for the rest of the grounds, they were going to need help. Most of the grounds could wait though. The kitchen garden was the most important thing. She could put off the rest of the grounds until next spring. By then hopefully, she would have some idea of what she was doing here.
Over the course of the week, one thought kept occurring to her: things would go faster if they had some help. That and the big house seemed empty with just the two of them. Well, three if you counted Hayate. Apparently, Kazuha agreed with her as she brought it up at dinner one night.
"What do you think about maybe having a few more boarders here? We could use the help, and I'm sure there are others who lost everything in the war."
"I've been thinking about that too. A few more people would be both helpful and make the house seem a little less empty. But not too many."
"I think another two or three people would do it."
Riza considered it. On the one hand, it would solve a number of problems, but on the other, it would mean that the house and grounds would be completely livable that much faster. Once that was done, she didn't know what was next. She was going to have to have something to keep her busy, but she really had no clue what at this point.
"I'll do some looking around, and see what I can find. I think I'd rather take people close to your age than take in younger folks. I know there are a lot of orphans these days, but I don't think I could manage a house full of children right now."
"That's fine will me. Let me know if you find anyone."
Life quickly found patterns. Breakfast was always an hour and a half after sunrise. Afternoons were spent working on the garden. Monday was market day down in the village. She and Kazuha had found a spinning wheel tucked away in a storage room, and one of the local farmwives had offered to teach her to spin. So she spent her evenings after dark practicing. She wasn't very good at it, but there was something soothing in the repetitive motions. She still had nightmares. Not as often, but they were there. She wasn't the only one either. Kazuha might have been sheltered from some of the worst of the war, but she had still seen plenty. In some ways, it helped to know that she wasn't the only one who was still haunted by the war.
Riza's search for other boarders had gone well, and they were expecting three young Germans to arrive next month. Edward Elric and his brother, Alphonse, had spent the war working for various intelligence agencies. Apparently, they had felt more than a little out of place in their hometown after the war and felt they needed a new start. With them came Winry Rockbell, their childhood friend. She'd lost the last of her family during the war and was refusing to be separated from the boys. They were all in their late teens.
It was Hayate's barking that alerted them to the visitors. Both of the women were working on clearing out the kitchen garden. They wouldn't get much from it until next year, but at least it would ready for planting next spring, and there were a few things they could grow now. Kazuha stretched. "I'll go see who it is. It's probably just an early delivery."
When she didn't return in five minutes, Riza went after her. Maybe she was just paranoid, but she always carried a gun with her, and she wasn't about to let anything happen to her friend or her new home. She rounded the side of the house to find Kazuha wrapped in the arms of a young man in a RAF uniform. To one side of them stood a pair of men who looked like twins, smiling, and one of them was snapping pictures with a camera. On their other side, standing by the car parked in the drive, was her colonel.
He looked wonderful. Well, to tell the truth, he looked weary and anxious, but that just made him more real to her. Her puppy was busy trying get him to throw a stick for him.
"Hayate, heel." The puppy promptly trotted over to her.
"Hawkeye."
"Colonel."
He smiled that rueful little smile of his and gestured to the oblivious couple. "He wanted to drive around France looking for her, and those friends of his weren't going to let him do alone. That wouldn't be a good idea given the stories I've heard about those three. I mean, they're trying to rebuild their country after all."
He raked a hand through his hair. "Anyway, word got around among the women in the military that you'd quit and why you'd quit, and Gracia, one of the nurses, is Maes' girlfriend and told him, and he told me about it. But my contacts back in London didn't know where'd you'd gone. I wouldn't have known either of you were here, except Edward stopped by to deal with the paperwork before he left for England and mentioned where he was going. And then a week later, they showed up. It was really perfect because it gave me an excuse to come back here and find you."
He was silent for a moment after that then reached out to tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I sort of had words with Archer when we were in London. Did you know he probably won't be able to get a date for the next five years? Apparently, almost every woman in the military in London knows what he tried to do to you. About a quarter of them have threatened him with bodily harm if he comes near them or their friends. But, I wanted to ask, are you okay? I mean…"
He trailed off, looking distressed, and she realized she was crying. He stepped closer, and his hands came up to cup her face. "Please don't cry. I didn't mean to upset you. I just…"
She managed to press a finger to his lips. "I'm okay. It's fine. You're just really very sweet sometimes."
And suddenly he was kissing her. Or she was kissing him. She wasn't really sure. She was rather breathless and a little confused when he released her mouth. She was, however, tucked up against his chest, and the colonel didn't seem willing to let go of her.
"God, I've missed you. It was bad enough when you were in the field, but at least I knew you would check in from time to time." He buried his face in her hair. "You're not allowed leave me again."
She pushed back from him to look him in the eye, and then she smirked. "You can't give me orders anymore, sir."
"Roy," he corrected.
"As nauseatingly sweet as these displays are," a voice cut through the moment, "some of us are getting hungry."
Roy turned, still keeping an arm around her waist, to answer the comment, but the other young man had beaten him to it.
"Who said the ladies would be interested in feeding you, Kudo." He then turned back to Kazuha. "Ignore him. He's always telling me that I have no tact, but he forgets he suffers from the same condition."
Riza sighed. She was the de facto hostess after all.
"Come inside. We'll feed you, but you'll have to help. And knowing your names would be nice, unless you want to be known as idiots one and two." Addressing Kazuha's young man, "If I remember correctly, you're Lt. Hattori."
"Yes, ma'am. Thank you for your hospitality. Idiots one and two are Shinichi Kudo and Kaito Kuroba, but I think your name for them fits better."
She laughed, leading the way into the house.
"I take it those three are always like that?"
The colonel sighed. "For the most part. Apparently, they can be absolutely brilliant in battle together, but the rest of the time they just drive everyone crazy."
The boys made themselves useful setting the table while Kazuha ducked into the kitchen to make sure they had enough dinner to feed everyone. Thankfully, she had been making stew that evening with enough to be the next day's lunch. Instead the leftovers were used to feed the boys. Throughout dinner, the three boys took turns telling their side of the whole story, which a great deal more amusing than her own. Colonel Mustang was unusually silent, but he kept reaching over to touch her hand as if to reassure himself that she was really here.
After dinner, they all ended up in what had once been the parlor where talk turned to their plans. Both Kudo and Kuroba had fiancées back in London who wanted to meet Kazuha. Actually, the two young women would have come along if there had been room in the car. As it was, it sounded like the plan was for the girls to take the train to Cardiff, and the boys and Kazuha would meet them there for a weekend. Riza wouldn't be surprised if afterwards an offer would be extended to Kazuha to stay at one of the girl's homes. Riza didn't mind really. The Elrics and company would be here soon enough, and maybe the colonel would stay for awhile. It was obvious that Kazuha and her lieutenant were in love, and Riza wasn't about to do anything that would separate them. She knew too well how it felt to be away from the person you loved.
She also told Kazuha as much while the two of them hunted up clean sheets for everyone.
"You're sure you don't mind?"
"Kazuha, I wouldn't have told you to go if I did. I do want an invite to the wedding though."
The younger woman blushed. "You seem sure there'll be one."
"He was willing to drive all over France to find you. I think he's serious."
She saw them off to the village's station the next morning for the ten o'clock train. And then it was just her and the colonel, and neither of them seemed to know what to say. There was an odd silence the entire way back to the house. It wasn't uncomfortable, but there was a feeling of expectation to it. They ended up in the kitchen; Roy sitting at the table while she fixed tea. He caught wrist once she'd placed the tea cup in front of him.
"Hawkeye. Riza, I…" He sighed. "I'm usually so good with words. And yesterday… Look, you have ever right to shoot me if you think I taking advantage of you. I'm not trying to. But after yesterday I thought, I hoped that I wasn't the only one. I know you have your own life, and I wouldn't ask you to give that up, but I more than anything I want you in mine."
She slid her wrist out of his grip, so she could take his hand in her own. "Are you asking me to marry you?"
He smiled. "I'm trying to. I don't think I'm doing a very good job of it."
"You do realize I'm not ever going to be one of those perfect model wives?"
"Thank God. That would bore me silly. I want a partner. You the only person I know who I can see beside me throughout my entire life."
She leaned down to kiss him.
"Is that a yes?"
"Riza? Are you still awake? You really don't have to wait up for me."
She smiled up at him. "I don't mind. I was just remembering. Rowan should nod off in a few minutes anyway. Once she's settled, we can go back to bed. There's no rush."
Themes:
Quotes: "Evil often triumphs, but never conquers." - Joseph Roux
Pictures: A Moment's Peace (traditional painting)
Words: sacrosanct (Roy, Riza, and their daughter in the moonlight. Opening section)