AN: I do not own the characters. AC pairing :) Hope you like it.
I remember the first time I met her. She was smart, brilliant, and she had a passion for her job. She was also a brunette and I was easily attracted to her. Especially those deep brown eyes, full of intensity when she enters the interrogation room.
I wasn't always accepted in the precinct. She and I fought on almost every case. We would butt heads and somehow we got together and we got married after 3 years of dating.
I had it all. I loved Olivia and she loved me. A year later... I remember the day we decided that we wanted a kid. Olivia was so excited. She always wanted a kid and here she is going to have one. The doctor used my eggs and placed them inside her. We agreed that she would carry our baby. We intensely gazed at all the donors. We actually had fun doing it. Once we chose one; our world began.
The first month went by pretty well. I actually had to stop her from consuming junk food knowing the first trimester was crucial. It was hard months after that to cease her from going to work. She loved her job and couldn't let go. I was relentless and I made sure that she didn't go.
I remember the day her water broke and I rushed her to the hospital. She was in pain. I wished that I could take it all from her, but all I could do was watch.
"I don't want this anymore...tell him to go back." Olivia told me whimpering.
Tears fell out of my eyes, "Babe...you can do this. Come on push...I love you." I said as I held her hand.
"Push, Olivia." The nurse smiled and gave her encouraging words...moments after that I saw my baby boy, blonde hair and blue eyes.
"Look, at you...babe, you did a great job." I told her as I was crying touching the nose of my baby boy.
"We did a good job...now, what are we going to name this bundle of joy?" Olivia asked me.
"Max Alex Benson-Cabot." I answer. I knew she loved the name by the way she looked at me.
"Hey, Max..." She told the dozed off baby.
That was four years ago. Meaning Max is four and Olivia and I are having trouble in our relationship.
We are divorcing. We knew it was imminent. It was just a say of, when. I love Olivia, but we grew apart. She is never home. I quit my job so I can stay at home with Max and she would work. I don't mind...but I have a feeling she rather be at work than home. When we came back home with Max, shortly after he was born, she would finish everything to hurry and get home. Now, it is more like every case keeps her at the precinct for the least, four days. Here's my life.
I came through the door with a bunch of groceries and a hyperactive kid running around with a bottle of soda. I set it down and yell out Olivia's name.
She comes out of the room with her pajama's still on. She stretches. "What time is it?" she asks.
I roll my eyes as she comes in the kitchen and opens the refrigerator. "It is 2 in the afternoon. You promised Max that you would go to the park with him..." I whisper to her.
"Whoa...there is still time. I'll take him." She replies like it is no big thing.
She loves Max to death, but sometimes she just doesn't know how much it hurts a kid when a person does not follow through with their promises.
"Alex, my lawyer is asking about custody...are you going to take him. Because I will fight you on this..."
"Liv, If I wanted full custody...I would win. I don't want full custody. He is as much yours as mine." I tell her as I take the groceries out of the bag.
"I can't believe that we are actually doing this...what happened to us?" she asks as she leans on the counter next to me.
"Olivia...you are really asking this...right now? We grew apart...I...don't think we finished the same way we started. Something went terribly wrong down the line." I answer her.
"I still love you...I just want you to know that." She tells me looking down at her feet.
"Mom!" Max screams. When he calls mom that means Olivia. Mommy...that's me.
Olivia turns towards him and smiles so brightly. I remember when I could do that to her.
"Hey, Little guy. I missed you last night...I wanted to read you a bedtime story." Olivia picked him up and cradled him on her hips.
"Mommy and me went to the store and we buy'd lots of stuff." He smiled.
"You did?" Olivia asked him smiling.
He nodded uncontrollably. "When are we going to the park?" Max stated incoherently.
"Right now, I guess. Wait for me to dress up." Olivia touched his nose and kissed him and placed him down.
"I love you." Olivia tickled his tummy.
He has the cutest giggle. "I love you." He starts running for his toys.
"Be careful, Max." I yell.
"Ok, mommy!" he yells back,
"I really love that kid." Olivia tells me looking at him play.
"Olivia...court is tomorrow. It is about splitting assets. You need to be there." I tell her as she starts to walk out.
She turns around. "I know. Cragen knows about our situation. He will let me out early." She barely is coherent and she walks away.
I know, I am still living with my soon to be ex-wife. We decided that we will live together until I get my job and for Max. I don't want him to grow up in a split household until it is permanent. We haven't spoken to him yet and I have an idea that it will be hard. We planned to tell him today after Olivia takes him to the park; however, I am not mentally ready to admit that Olivia and I are no more.
I head to the living room after putting away the groceries and watch Max play with his toys. Olivia comes out dressed in sweats and a tank top. "Alright, Max, are you ready to go?" She asks him.
He stops everything he is doing and starts jumping up and down. "Yes!" he screams.
"Ok! " She replies just as excited back. "I'll be back in an hour. I'm going to the park then eat out with him. You can join if you want to."
"No, I have things to do." I answer.
She shrugs and sighs, "Ok. See you later." She grabs Max's hand and walks him out of the house.
Olivia truly spoils that kid. I am the strict one to some degree. She loves him to death and that is what counts.
I am headed to get my job back with McCoy and work as an ADA. I can't wait to get back. It was something I truly missed when I was with Olivia. Although it was my choice to let her work...I really am glad I am back.
I knock on his door. "Come in."
I open the door and he looks up and smiles. The first time I have ever seen him smile. "Alexandra Cabot!" he yells excitedly as he gets off his seat, shuts the door, and hugs me. "Sit, sit." I sit on the office couch with him. "How are you?" he asks.
He knows about Olivia and I. "Not so good..."
"Hey, that is ok. You can start when you are ready." He stands up. "We have a desk setup for you in another ADA's office for now, until we find an open office for you."
He leads me out of the room to another room that used to be my office, but replaced with the name Casey Novak. Isn't that the white collar crime lawyer?
He stops smiling and knocks on the door.
"Come in." A deep womanly voice echoes out of the room.
He opens the door and I see a stunning red head with piercing green eyes. Hair just drops over her shoulder. Very long.
She drops everything as she sees McCoy. "Good Afternoon Casey. This is..."
"Alexandra Cabot...I heard so much about you around here." She smiles as she comes close and shakes my hand.
I smile back. "Nice to meet you." I reply.
"Alex, you will have to share your office with Casey, until you office is fixed. We set a desk, over here." He points. "Thank you for coming back." He nodded. "I have to get to court, but I would love to talk to you over dinner."
"That would be great." I respond.
He walks out of the office.
Did he just leave me here with someone I really don't know?
Casey walks back to her desk. "I would love to get to know you...are you free tomorrow?"
"Yes, after court. We can familiarize ourselves,,, around nine?" I ask.
She nods. "Ok, see you tomorrow." She smiles.
"Nice meeting you again, counselor." I reply and walk out of her...our office. She is nice. I look forward to getting to know her.
I head back home around seven and I don't see Olivia home yet so I enter the house and take a quick nap.
"Mommy! Mommy!" I hear Max screaming in my ear.
I slowly open my eyes. "Hey." I answer.
"Mom and me have lots of fun!" he continued.
"That is good." I state now sitting up.
I pick him up and bring him to the living room to where I see Olivia sitting down. She breathes in. "Are you ready?" She asks me.
I nod.
I seat max on Olivia's lap and turn towards them. "Max, mommy and I have to tell you something." Olivia breathed. "Mommy and I have run into some...problems...and we aren't the same as we used to be...so we have to split up." Olivia told him gently.
"Like Jason's parents?" He asked.
It was my turn. "Yes...kind of like that."
"You don't love me anymore?" He wondered innocently.
I stared into his deep blue eyes. "No, sweetheart, we will always love you."
"You don't love mom?" he asks.
"Of course I do with all my heart." I answered truthfully back.
"Then why?" he asks.
"We are just not...the same anymore." I answer him to the best of my ability.
"This is stupid!" he yelled as he slid off Olivia's lap.
"Hey, watch your language." I reply sternly.
"Jason said he hates his parents..." he starts crying, "I hate you!" he screams as her enters his room and shuts the door.
I suddenly feel tears running down my face. I look at Olivia who is also crying. I wipe my tears and get up.
"I'll do it. He may not understand...This sucks." She stands up and heads to his room.
I never in a thousand years I thought that I would divorce the love of my life. She will always be...but, at this point in her life she wants something totally different that we both wanted years ago. She wants to save lives and I want to be a family.