I'm not broken… Yet.

Disclaimer: Characters is owned my JKR.

Anything you recognize isn't mine.

"Well, what would you EXPECT me to do? I can't wave my magic wand and make THIS go away!"

Silence.

"I think, in theory you could."

"This is NO time of a matter to be JOKING, Malfoy!"

I caught myself looking into your pale blue eyes. You are, whether or not I wanted to admit it, perfection in my eyes.

"Why.. are you saying my name like that.." I heard to my horror that my voice became thin, shaky, and almost as vulnerable as you look, lying upon my bed, only with your jeans still on.

His skin looks pale, it has almost the same color as the moon. His hair is black as the sky tonight and was always perfect messy, no matter what he did to it. He could comb it for hours.

I don't know why, but his beauty always caught me in a kind of awe. I have no idea how anything or anyone could be so completely flawless.

I felt the anger building up inside me - WHY was it, no matter WHAT, you always made me feel this helpless. Like, I have no power what so ever towards you. I have no resistance towards those eyes.

You get up from the bed, walk towards the window shelf, and almost fall down upon it, looking highly pathetic and self-pitying and of course so beautiful close to perfection as always.

"GOD! What is the matter with you! I'm trying to get through to you here! It's not only hard on you, this, you know that? I'm sacrificing EVERYTHING, just to be with you, and still you wont let me in!"

I watch you in silence, and your quiet voice whispers "Please just leave. Everybody is… they'll be up any minute. Just … leave."

An attack of rage flows through my body. Every fiber in my body screams of aching pain. "I DON'T CARE! WHY WON'T YOU REALIZE THAT!? I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF EVERYBODY WALKED IN ON US RIGHT NOW! I'D BE HAPPY TO QUIT THE HIDING AROUND!" I'm huffing for air- desperately seeking eye contact with you "If this is love, I've never felt anything like this before. And I do NOT want to let it go. And, you DO know how I can be persistive.

Horrified I watch as a tear fall gently from your eyes. Don't you know how much it hurts to see you cry? To know that I am the one causing you pain..

"Don't do this to me dammit! Don't cry! STOP IT! LOOK AT ME!" But still you cry in silence, looking blankly out the window. I grab your shoulders and start to shake you – my last pathetic try to get a reaction. I scream out of helplessness and lets go of you, and fall to my knees from exhaustion, feeling nothing but the wet tears falling from my eyes, and the salty taste on my lips. My heart is pounding so hard in my chest, it feels like it's going to burst, and it's ringing to my ears. You hand falls to the top of my head, and you slowly brush through my hair.

"I hate being in love with you" – you whisper with a shaking voice.

And still you know we'll be here again and again, night after night. Making love, and hating, and screaming. Till' the day we die, or break from this aching state of mind.

That's it – my very first fanfiction on fanficnet ! Hope you enjoy. Don't be to harsh, English is not my first languish.