The Tales of the Pwetty Pwetty Pwincess
A.N: I had to write this story to convey how very fed up I am with General Hospital and all their Emily worship. It seems like all the characters of GH have become Noppers Nikolas and Emily Proppers and it's really, really annoying and very sickening. So I dedicate this story to all of you who are just as fed up with GH as I am and to the countless actors and actresses who deserve better storyline's than being stuck in Emily Hell. Especially Rebecca, Robin, Greg, Tony, Constance, Stuart and Leslie C. I have nothing against the actress that plays Emily, although I think she should take a vacation, a long, long vacation. This story doesn't include Emily's rape because rape is serious and is certainly not funny. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: I do not own GH!
Once upon a time in a land far, far away called Port Charles there lived a little girl named Emily Quartermaine. Emily was the sweetest, pwettiest, smartest little girl that ever lived. As Emily grew up in the sanctuary of the Quartermaine Mansion she blossomed into a loving, caring young woman who everyone adored. Emily was planning to marry Nikolas Cassadine, she was very excited because marrying him would make her a real pwincess. Emily was prefect, she did no wrong.
One morning she woke up to discover that something was terribly, terribly wrong in her fairytale. She stretched out in her king size bed, she was covered by pwetty pink blankets that were made from the finest, hand spun silk. After a few minutes of telling herself how prefect she was she pulled herself up in bed and waited for Reginald to bring her breakfast up. Emily glanced over at the alarm clock and noticed that he was two minutes late, she decided that tardiness just wouldn't do. She pushed back the pwetty pink blankets and climbed out of bed. After putting her robe and slippers on, they were pwetty pink too, she made her way down the hallway and down the stairs to see what was going on.
When Emily reached the foyer she could hear voices coming from the livingroom, she made her way over to the door and peeked inside. She smiled brightly, it looked like they were having a party and she knew that the party had to be in her honor. After all she was going to be a pwetty pwetty pwincess in only a few short weeks. Emily pushed the livingroom doors open to find it filled with her family and friends. Her bright smile was still plastered across her face, she knew that everyone would notice her presence in the room because after all she was the pwetty pwetty pwincess. When no one turned their attention toward her she simply made her way farther into the room, but still nobody noticed her.
She approached Pwince Nikolas. "Nikolas my love, you've thrown me the grandest party."
Nikolas gave her a strange look. "This party isn't for you Emily."
She began to pout, she stuck her bottom lip out as far as it would go. "It's not."
"No." he answered. "This party is for Alexis."
"Why does Alexis get a party" she asked. "That's not fair! Alexis isn't a pwetty, pwetty pwincess like me."
"Alexis was a pwincess long before you were born." Nikolas told her.
Helena walked across the room and looped her arms through Nikolas'"Darling, your not ignoring you bride to be are you" she purred.
"Of course not Grandmother." he answered with a smile. "I love my bride to be with all my heart. We have the strongest love in all the land."
Helena smiled. "Well, darling why don't you give your bride a nice big kiss and remind her how much you love her."
"Yes Grandmother."
Emily stood perfectly still and closed her eyes and puckered her lips as she waited for Nikolas to kiss her, but nothing happened. She opened her eyes to discover that her pwince Nikolas was across the room kissing some other girl. That wasn't fair to her because she was the pwetty, pwetty pwincess, not Maxie Jones.
Emily shot up in bed to discover that it was all just a bad dream. She threw back her pwetty pink blankets and made her way out of bed and downstairs to see what everyone was doing. In the den, Alan was having his morning coffee and reading the newspaper when she entered. "Hello Daddy." she said, cheerfully.
"Hello Emily." he said from behind his newspaper.
Emily sat down on the couch and started playing with the fringe on the decorative pillow. "Don't I look pwetty Daddy" she asked. "You didn't tell me how perfect I was."
Alan lowered the paper and smiled brightly at his daughter. "You look very, very pwetty Emily and you're so perfect."
Emily smiled from ear to ear and blushed slightly. "Thank you, Daddy."
Alan went back to reading his newspaper.
"Daddy" she interrupted again.
"Yes, dear"
"Did I make the paper again today" Emily asked.
"Yes." he answered. "There are seven articles on you."
"Only seven" she pouted. "That doesn't sound fair Daddy, after all I am going to be a pwincess in a few short weeks and I'm always doing something to help others. I'm so dedicated to saving the world. You do think that I can save the world don't you Daddy? Because you always said that I could do whatever I wanted in life and I want to be a heroine, a cross between Princess Diana and Mother Teresa. I'm just so perfect...Daddy"
While Emily was going on and on about herself, Alan decided that he just couldn't take it anymore, he took a pill bottle from his pocket, poured the contents into his mouth and washed them down with the rest of his morning coffee. Emily looked over to see Alan slumped down in the chair. "Daddy" she said softly. "Oh My goodness" she exclaimed. "Daddy's dead."
Edward entered the room to discover Emily standing over Alan. "My darling Emily, is there something wrong" he asked.
"Daddy's dead." she told him. "He took too many pills."
"Oh my." Edward sighed.
"Do you think that he did it because of me" she cried. "Did I do something wrong"
"No, no." Edward assured her. "You never do anything wrong dear, Alan just had a problem with pain pills, that's all. He wasn't as strong as my perfect pwincess Emily."
Emily smiled. "Thank you Grandfather, you're right, it wasn't my fault. Nothing is ever my fault because I'm perfect and I do no wrong."
"That's right." he told her.
"Grandfather, did I tell you how I plan to solve world hunger" she asked him. "I plan to travel to all the third world countries and help them grow crops. I'm going to teach them how to plant seeds and water them so that they'll grow. Only I'm not actually going to show them how to plant the seeds because I don't want to touch the dirt because that would be gross it would get my hands and nails all dirty and besides there are all kinds of bugs in the dirt and...Grandfather"
Emily looked over to see Edward laying on the ground clutching his chest. "Oh my goodness" Emily exclaimed. "Let me get your nitroglycerin." she said as she hurried over to the desk to retrieve them and then hurried back over to him. "Grandfather, open your mouth and let me place this under your tongue. It'll make you all better and we can tell everyone how I saved your life and then maybe they can write about it in the Port Charles Harold."
Edward shook his head violently. "No, no, no. I want to die! I want to go far, far away from here. Away from you"
"Oh, Grandfather, you don't mean that."
He clamped his mouth shut and then drifted in the light.
Reginald walked into the room . "What happened here" he asked.
"I don't know." Em answered dumbly. "I was just telling Daddy and Grandfather about how perfect I was and how I was going to do great things and save the...Reginald"
Reginald slumped to the ground.
"Oh, my." she sighed. "Not Reginald too. I have to get out of this house, it seems like everyone is dying here and I'm the perfect pwetty, pwetty pwincess and I have to live forever to reign in the throne of perfection."
Emily started to flee the Quartermaine Mansion when Tracy entered the foyer. "Saint Emily, where are you off to" she asked. "You are much too perfect and pure to leave the house without anyone this early in the morning."
"Oh, Auntie Tracy, I'm afraid that if I don't get out of this house that something terrible is going to happen to me."
"Saint Emily, nothing bad would ever happen to you. Everybody loves you. After all you're going to be a pwetty, pwetty pwincess in just a few short weeks." Tracy smiled. "You're so perfect."
"Oh, I know that I'm as pure as the Virgin Mary." Emily exclaimed. "It's just that everyone is dying in this house."
"Everyone is dying" she asked.
"Yes. Daddy and Grandfather and Reginald."
"Well, Emily, it's not your fault." Tracy told her. "They were older men that probably died of natural causes. It wasn't your fault."
"I'm perfect and I know that everybody loves me, but if I stay in this house and I die then who's going to save the rest of Port Charles and the world from all the evil? If I'm not here then Port Charles will fall apart, it will break up families and everyone will fight again and that would be horrible because violence is never the way to solve problems unless I'm trying to protect myself from evil and then violence and guns and death is okay...Tracy"
Tracy took a poisonous pill that Helena had given her out of her pocket while Emily was talking and swallowed it. She fell to the ground in a heap.
"Tracy" she called. "Tracy"
Ned came down the stairs. "Emily, what's the matter" he asked.
"Oh, Ned, everyone I've come in contact with this morning has died."
"Emily, it's not your fault." he assured her. "It's never your fault haven't you learned that by now? You're so perfect."
"I'm the pwetty, pwetty pwincess of Port Charles and soon to be the pwetty, pwetty pwincess of Spoon Island. I'm going to be Mrs. Nikolas Cassadine and we're going to rule all of Greece together. Pwince and Pwincess Cassawhine will be the greatest Monarch of all time, we'll solve all the world's problems...Ned"
Ned slumped to the ground.
"All that sin that filled your life when you were Eddie Maine finally caught up to you." Emily sighed. "If you would have lead a perfect life like me then maybe you wouldn't have died."
Emily fled the Quartermaine Mansion and headed over to General Hospital. She thought that if she was in a hospital she would be safe and if something happened to her that she could save herself with all the machines and medical equipment. "Oh, Mom." Emily said as she approached her.
Monica smiled. "Emily, my pwetty, pwetty pwincess, what are you doing here all by yourself"
"There was something wrong at home and I had to come here." she told her. "Daddy and Grandfather and Reginald and Ned and Tracy have all died."
"They have" she asked. "What happened? Did someone try to hurt you and end up killing them instead, my perfect daughter"
"I don't know, Mom, but there's something seriously wrong."
Monica grew concerned for her perfect daughter. "Oh, Emily, I don't think anybody would ever hurt you, you are too pwetty and smart and perfect and loving. You're the fairest in all the land."
"I know." Emily sighed. "That's why I don't understand. I was just telling Daddy how pwetty I was when he took all those pills and I was just explaining to Grandfather how perfect I was when he had his heart attack. And Reginald, I was just telling him how Daddy and Grandfather died when he died. The I was just telling Auntie Tracy how pure I was when she died and Ned, he just died because he was too sinful to be standing in my presence...Mom"
While Emily was talking Monica couldn't take it anymore. She was afraid that someone would blame her because she raised Emily so she pulled a syringe full of morphine out of her pocket that she had for a dying patient and injected herself. She slowly slumped to the ground.
Emily lowered herself to the ground. "Mom" she called out as she check for a purse, but there was none."
"Emily" Elizabeth called as she walked over and knelt down next to her. "What happened? Are you alright"
"I'm fine, it's just that Mom is dead." she told Elizabeth.
"Oh, Emily, it isn't your fault."
"I know." Emily agreed. "I'm so perfect, I never do anything wrong. Anything had that happens is always someone else's fault."
"And don't forget that you are going to marry Nikolas and become a pwetty, pwetty pwincess." Elizabeth reminded her. "You're so lucky Emily to have so many people that love you. No one will ever love me the way everyone loves you."
Emily sighed. "You're right, Elizabeth, no one will ever be as pwetty or as great as I am. I'm a role model not only to girls in Port Charles, but to young girls all across the world. True they will never be as pwetty or as perfect as I am, but they can try really, really hard. I mean the world would be a much better place if it were filled with more pure, loving, caring, perfect people like me who never do anything wrong...Elizabeth."
Elizabeth slumped over on top of Monica, during her conversation with Emily she pulled the second syringe from Monica's pocket and injected herself. The syringe rolled out of her hand and rolled across the floor."
"Oh, Elizabeth, didn't you know that it's never a good idea to use drugs to kill your pain" she asked. "If you would have told me about your problems I could have helped." Emily got up and walked toward the elevator.
"Emily" Dr. Steven Webber called out. "I have some paperwork for you to fill out regarding your midterm evaluation."
"Doctor Webber, I'm sure I did fine and that I don't have to fill anything out. I'm so perfect and I never have to study for anything because I already know how to save patients. I've saved so many lives because I'm so smart and I've never even read a medical book."
"I'm sorry, Emily." he told her. "I don't know what I was thinking, having you the perfect medical student fill out this paper. How stupid of me."
Emily smiled brightly. "Just don't let it happen again."
"Oh, Emily, you are so pwetty."
"Thank you." she said. "Everyone tells me so and it couldn't be more true. I'm going to be a real live pwincess in just a few weeks. You have to come to my wedding. Everyone who's still alive in Port Charles is going to be there to see me walk down the aisle. I'll be so pwetty in my dress...Dr. Webber"
Steven injected himself with a syringe of a deadly drug that he had in his pocket because listening to Emily was like slow torture. He slumped to the ground.
"Oh, no, another one." Emily sighed. "Oh well, Nikolas will still love me.
Emily walked over to the nurse's station where Bobbie was standing. "Bobbie, do I have any messages"
Bobbie smiled. "Of course Emily. You always have tons of messages. Everyone is your friend and everyone wants your love and attention."
Emily smiled back. "I know, don't you wish you were as pwetty as me Bobbie? Then you wouldn't have any problem finding a life of your own because everyone would love you like they love me. Do you know how many people would die for me? Do you know how many people have already died for me...Bobbie"
Bobbie slowly slumped to the ground.
"Oh, well, you're just another one I can add to my list."
TBC...
In chapter two Emily takes on the teen scene and the PCPD along with the legal eagles.
Note to readers of the Ric/Alexis/Luke/Skye story Shattered. I'm having major computer problems but as soon as it's fixed I'll post the remaining chapters. I also have another Ric/Alexis/Luke/Skye story in the works.
Please, please review!
Thanks!