Disclaimer: I don't own Phantom of the Opera, because Raoul would have died with a hole in his head at the end before we forced the rabid Raoul fangirls to eat him. Now I must hide from my rabid Raoul fangirl sister.
Note: To the tune of Mrs. Lucy Had a Baby
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Oooohhhh…
Erik was a stalker
Oh such a stalker boy!
He said he really loved Christine
But she was just a toy!
He wrote Christine an opera
He taught her how to sing!
He said he really loved her but
Treated her like a thing!
So Christine sang his opera
So Christine played along!
So Christine gave Erik a kiss
When it fit in a song!
But never kiss your stalker
He does not brush his teeth! (Ew.)
Besides when all is said and done
He kisses like a leaf!
So run away from stalkers
And find a pansy fop! (Raoul)
At least he just might listen when
You say you want to stop!
But now what of the stalker?
Oh it sucks to be him!
Oh cheer up Erik, don't you cry
You're life's not all that grim!
(Note: Yes, it is.)