Hey everyone! I haven't uploaded anything in so long! It's great to be back and writing fanfiction with all of you again! Just where I want to be! :) Please read and let me know what ya think. :]
They say seeing, is believing. So, why is that even though I'm standing here in front of Eli, close enough to feel the heat radiating from his body and into mine, lips only inches apart, can I not believe that this is actually happening? That after everything we've been through, we're back to this? Here, back to each other. Back to this moment when we come together as one.
What had changed in the course of a few days, when Eli walked through the door, offering up his genuine help on the school newspaper?
I was uncertain about what came next. Not that I didn't want to kiss Eli, because I knew I did. My whole body knew I did. My erratic heart beat was lucid in giving that away. It was the uncertainty of wading back into uncharted waters, that I was wary about. Not knowing what would come next. What would happen after we kissed? Would things go back to the way they used to be, before the diagnosis of Eli's bipolar disorder? Before Jake? Before Imogen? Back to when it was just Eli and I, and his witty come backs?
Whatever uncertainty there was, it dissipated after Eli took that final step closer, closing the gap between us, and whatever had lay between since we had last been together. It all disappeared. In that one moment, I knew what I wanted.
I still wasn't sure about what would happen after, but in that moment, I didn't care anymore. I knew I wanted Eli, wanted to be with him. And even though if after the kiss was over, and things never went back to the way they were before, I was okay with that. Okay with being with Eli for one last time. To remember what it felt like. That happiness that we once shared.
Eli washed away my fears, and I knew then, where I had always wanted to be, and it was in his arms. In his presence. Feeling his kiss, his soft, warm lips on mine. His hand gently sweeping up to cup the side of my face, the other pressed against the small of my back, pulling me closer to him, so we could re-connect, in the one way both of us were certain enough how. And I knew all this because it was simply, in his kiss.