I should not be writing these. I have other stories I should be doing but here I am writing oneshots instead. For anyone reading the other stories I made here is my apology: I am terribly sorry for taking forever but I am just trying to make them better; especially my GF story. There is just so many directions I want to take each story and I am taking a long time. I'm sorry.
Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom
Dani never understood why Danny loved stargazing at night. She never could see how he would stay up on the roof for hours just staring at the stars. One night she decides to sneak up on Danny only to find a sad Halfa.
"The strongest people are not those who show their strength in front of us but who win battles we know nothing about"- Jonathan Harnisch
Stargazer
"Hey Danni I'm going up to the roof," Danny Fenton said, hovering off the floor, "You'll be fine down here right?"
I looked at Danny and shook my head, smiling as he drifted up through the ceiling. Sighing, I put my feet on the plush purple couch and flipped through TV channels.
Life was amazing. Well, as amazing as it could get for a half ghost clone living with my cousin when his parents weren't home. When Danny's parents were home though I go around the world experiencing the sights and messing with people. The only thing that I worry about would be Vlad and to stay away from Wisconsin, but Danny always reassured me that he would protect me from Vlad. Danny protects everyone though. See, Danny he is a hero. The hero of Amity Park against anything ghostly and on occasion from normal crimes like burglaries. The town knows him as many names but most call him Phantom. Their own ghostly protector. Danny is a halfa like me. Half ghost and half human. His ghost side Phantom is respected while his human side is treated like trash. Danny Fenton, son of Amity Parks leading 'ghost hunters'. He gets bullied constantly and is overlooked as the clumsy looser of Caper High.
Life was amazing for me, but not for Danny. He always argued with me about not being tired, or hurt. He always reassured me he was fine even if he was stitching a long bleeding wound. Life was not fair to those who deserve it. And if anyone deserved a good life, it would be Danny.
Sighing again I sat down the remote and swung my legs off the couch. Looking down at my hands I ignited a small ectoblast and played with it in my hands. The green swirls danced in my palms harmlessly.
"Not fair," I repeated this time out loud as I went into the kitchen.
On the table sat an open twelve-pack of cherry coke and I swiftly flew over and grabbed two. Maybe a couple minutes of stargazing wouldn't hurt.
Flying up to the ceiling I phased through until my head poked out of the roof. Danny was sitting on the edge with his legs against his chest and arm around his legs holding them close. Deciding to keep hidden a while longer I slowly hovered over to him. His head looked up at the stars with a dead look, blue eyes gazing across the cloudless sky. The light from the stars illuminated his face and his dark circles stood out prominently. My heart clenched at the sight. How could anyone be hateful toward Danny?
A flicker of movement caught my attention and I refocused on Danny. He was wiping a hand acrossed his face and let out a shuddering sigh. He let out a shaky laugh and rubbed his face again.
He's trying not to cry.
Even when he thinks no one is watching, he still puts on his facade of being ok.
Another shaky sigh comes out and tears flow down his cheeks and drop onto the roof. I reach out to touch his shoulder but pull back at the last second. Dropping my invisibility I sit beside him. He turns to me and then quickly hides his face.
"Before you ask," He mumbles into his hands, "I'm fine."
There were those words again. I'm fine. Whatever.
"You know," I turn toward him and let my lips curl into a frown, "I'm going to ban you from saying 'I'm fine'."
Danny kept his head down and I sighed. Why won't he accept that it's ok to not be fine? Because he thinks he has to be strong all the time because he's the hero. Of course he would think something like that. It's always the same thing with Danny. I glance at him again and see him in the same position.
"You can either sit and sulk or you can tell me what on your mind Danny," I say while opening one of the cans, "Your choice, though I favor the second option."
He finally takes his head out of his hands to glare at me and I stick my tongue out at him. Danny stretched his back and three loud cracks came. I worriedly glanced at his face, but he showed no pain.
"Well," He said swinging his legs over the roof, "I'll have you know there is nothing on my mind and I am fine. Thank you very much."
He tossed me a playful grin but I did not return the smile. Glancing down inside the can I sloshed the carbonated liquid inside. Fake. Fake. Fake. Stupid hero-complexion. Sighing yet again I looked up into the night sky for advice on how to deal with stubborn half ghost teenagers. The stars twinkled back as if saying they had no idea. I let out a chuckle.
"What's so funny?" Danny asked head turned to a side.
"You. And you're not funny you're stubborn," I stared at him intently, "Why do you have to deny that you're clearly not fine!"
"Dani I am-"
"No!" I stood up and pointed an accusing finger at him, "I swear if you say you are fine again I will shove you into a thermos with Skulker!"
Danny stared up at me. As if I flipped a switch he went from fake smiles to the Danny that was crying on the roof just minutes before. I let my shoulders fall and the anger I felt a moment ago vanished. I sat back down and let my head fall.
"Danny I'm sorry I just want to help and I can't do that when you pretend that you're fine." I said and glanced at Danny.
Danny was staring at the stars again. He seemed older than a 14 year old with the star light on his face. He seemed at peace with himself as if this was the only thing he needed in his life. My fingers fidgeted with the can in my hands. There were so many things I wanted to ask Danny, but when he didn't want to talk, Danny would not talk. I opened my mouth to talk but Danny spoke first.
"I am fine," Danny said through clenched teeth, "I am always fine."
Looking at him my anger came back, yet I said nothing. Why did he do this to himself? Why does he insist he is always 'fine'? Clearly, Danny was not fine. So why does he insist he is?
"You don't always have to be 'fine' Danny," I said sitting the can down, "I know you think that since you're the hero you have to always stay strong and be 'fine', but you don't. It's ok to cry."
He glared at his hands, "I don't cry."
I grabbed his hands and squeezed. Stubborn. He was about to cry. His hands were slightly shaking and he blinked rapidly. Liar.
"Whatever," I let go of his hands, picking up the abandoned can once again.
We sat in silence together. Danny sat looking at the stars, still blinking rapidly and his hands were clenched together. He was about to cry. He needed to cry. He needed to talk to someone.
"Dani," Danny said suddenly still gazing at the stars," Have I ever told you why I like stargazing?"
"Umm," I reply, glancing back at Danny, "No."
Danny let his head fall only to bring it back up to the stars. His gaze shifted over to me and a tear leaked out. He looked alone and scared in the midnight light. I took notice how he has grown muscle since our last time together. A new scar stretched from his left elbow to just below the sleeve of his shirt. His jeans were ripped at the knee and his red converse were dingy. I looked back to his face. His jaw was set as he looked back to the stars once again.
"Well," He bit his lip before continuing, "You know how you feel when traveling right?"
I looked at Danny but he would not meet my gaze. What does this have to do with me traveling?
"Yeah, I feel free and can be myself wherever I go," I said looking at Danny "What does that have to do with stargazing though Danny?"
He sat for a moment just staring at the stars suppressing his tears in. He tore his gaze away to look at me.
"Everything."
He looked back at the stars leaving me to my thoughts.
"Daniel Fenton," I said looking up at the stars, "You make no scene to me at all."
He chuckled weakly and looked at me and I returned to look. I saw right through his attempt to laugh and lighten the mood. I knew that deep inside the mind of Daniel Fenton he was hurting. I knew that he was broken and alone.
"We've got all night Danny," I say opening the other can of soda beside me and offer it to Danny, "I just want to help."
He studied the can doubtfully. Carefully he took the can from my hand and took a long sip. He sat the can down beside him and frowned.
"Guess I'm not getting out of this one huh?" He said studying his feet.
I shook my head, "Nope."
"So," I clapped my hands, "What does traveling and stargazing have in common?"
He looked at me then at the stars then back to me and the stars again. He sighed and rubbed a hand on the back of his neck. Nervous tick.
"Stargazing is what I do to feel free I guess," He shrugged," Like how traveling makes you feel free."
Danny gazed back my way and continued, "It's just…Just look at them. The stars I mean," Danny said quickly, "They shine so bright even in the darkest nights; especially on the really dark nights."
"I just…Well I…I've always wanted to be able to go up into space and see the stars from up there but with my life and my grades that'll never happen especially since of the ghost hunting, but I can still dream right?"
I stared at Danny as he struggled through his statement. Silent tears raced down his face against his will. He took a shuddering breath before chuckling. I frowned and shook my head. Everyone knew Danny wanted to be an astronaut, but he never shown this to anyone. The broken side.
"But that's not it," He said wiping a hand acrossed his face, "You know that though don't you."
It was a statement not a question. I shook my head willing him to continue. Danny never talked like this to anyone. Not even Sam or Tucker.
He nodded as more tears came, "It's just a lot," He said, rubbing a hand through his hair, "With the secrets, grades, ghosts, and just…everything."
"I…It's hard keeping up with everything, this way…The way I live is dangerous and I could die…Well, the rest of the way that is," He gestures to himself, "I hate that Sam, Tucker, and Jazz are part of this. I constantly worry about them and if they ever got hurt…"
When Danny stopped talking I looked at him to see him openly crying. He let out a heartbreaking sob and I scooted over to hold him. He melted into the embrace holding onto my shirt tightly.
"Danny, it's ok," I said, rubbing circles onto his back, "No one is going to get hurt."
"That's the thing Dani!" He exclaimed pulling away from my embrace, "They already have! They've gave up their lives for me! Sam and Tuck! They should be going to college having a future, but now they won't be able to go to college because of their grades and they may not have a future if I don't protect them!"
Danny didn't say the words, but it lingered in the air. They could die. He pulled his legs up to his chest and stared up at the stars. I sat there dumbfounded as Danny cried. I never realized how much Danny put on his shoulders. How much pressure he put on himself.
"I try, damn it, I try so hard to keep it together but it's hard," He gazed to the stars, "I always end up here, on this roof, watching these same stars."
"I'm sorry," I say as I stand up," I…I'll be inside if you need me."
He stood up as well and grabbed my arm. I stared into his lifeless blue eyes as he swallowed hard. A tear rolled down his cheek and fell to the ground. I felt heavy with the sad atmosphere weighing me down.
"Don't be sorry, I don't need or want to be pitied, "He let go of my arm and sat down, "I…Don't tell anyone what I said, I shouldn't have said that much, I'm sorry."
I took a deep breath and rubbed my face, "Is there more?" I asked quietly.
"When is there not more Dani?" He said still staring at the stars, "But, I'm fine."
I looked down at him and noticed the small straight lines decorating the underside of his arms. One was slowly bleeding as if it had recently been picked at. I swallowed hard and a tear rolled down my face.
"Yeah," I agreed turning intangible, "You're fine."
Then I sunk to the living room and laid on the coach trying to ignore the sobs I heard coming from the roof above.