Awakenings
"Han!" Leia could not draw herself away from her remorse. She touched her heart again the way she first felt it, the blade sliding into Han's chest. Since the battle at the First Order's Starkiller Base Leia could feel the blade as if it had gone through her own chest. The Resistance was victorious, but Han was dead. Her son had cut him down.
"Han!" Leia wanted to scream and shout. A part of her had truly gone with him. With what Force power she possessed she wanted to yell into the afterlife-or the nether world of the Force- to find Han, so she could speak to him one more time. To touch, smell, hold and feel him one more time.
But the matters of the living were before her now. The girl, Rey, had left to find and bring back Luke. Foremost, as well was the Resistance's next move, for the The First Order was on the move throughout the galaxy.
But the thought of Luke-the last Jedi-and of the Force drew her to the real challenge, the real danger. Leia could sense an awakening in the Force – surging and churning. The girl Rey kept returning to her mind. Issues of balance, something that Poe Dameron had mentioned in his mission report. Rey.
Luke –I have to reach him. But, Leia knew she did not have enough skill to create such a connection to reach Luke, not like they used to. After what Snoke did in turning Ben to the Dark Side, after Luke went into exile-they both knew it would be safe for them both not to speak to one another through The Force. She still remembered the time on Cloud City when Luke first spoke to her in her mind. Now, that connection felt atrophied – old and unused. It felt like ages-eons.
Leia attempted to reach out to Luke, the way in which they used to, in the way she had felt Han's death, but her mind clouded. She felt blocked, disconnected. How could she do this? And slowly but surely, recognition and memory began to return to her. But it wasn't enough. If she was going to reach out to Luke at this moment, she knew she would need help. And there was only one person who could help bridge the gap for her.
The last time she allowed herself to be open to such an – encounter, it did not go well. "Who was my mother?" she had pleaded. But Luke had to handle the rest of that encounter for the experience left her emotional and too filled with anger and pain.
Padmé. Padmé Amidala.
But after all of this time, and she did not want to accept or believe it. But did she need him now? Yes. Leia said to herself. More than ever.
Leia closed her eyes and breathed gently in the fashion Luke had taught her a long time ago and let her mind –no – her soul to speak into the waves of the Force. She sat still and concentrated.
"I know you are there." Leia whispered. "You always have been since that very first meeting after Endor. Since then, I know you've been on the edge of my periphery. At the edge of every unfinished thought I have had. You are on the tip of my tongue – at the conclusion of every conversation. I've…felt you every time I have entered an empty room. You have haunted me. Not you per say - - -but you have haunted me. I've run and I've run with no success." Leia lifted her head up. "And now here I am, finally turning to you because I know in my soul, in my heart, in my feelings –that I need you now."
"I thought it best to let you set the time and the place." Anakin Skywalker said gently and unsure to Leia.
Leia opened her eyes slowly and was met with the ghostly spirit of the man – a war hero, a Jedi, her once ago tormentor. Here she sat with the ghost of a man she never knew. And yet he came to her.
"Han- do you know..." Leia asked shakenly.
"He's safe and not alone. He will always be with you." Anakin assured her.
"Just like you have always been – as I have always felt you. But, he cannot do what you can do. What we can do."
"It is the way of The Force. What is – is. No more, no less." Anakin replied.
Silence stood between them for a moment. Leia drew a breath, unsure of herself. What do you say to man who was once your enemy? A man who was the enforcer of a brutal regime, ruled by the opponents of the Jedi Order?
"I know in the past of my reluctance and my anger to speak with you." Leia watched Anakin's head nod in acceptance, not in her honesty but in knowing that she had every right to that animosity.
"It was not a fact of reluctance, Leia. What you thought – what you felt. I would have accepted your silence for eternity if necessary." Anakin replied. "But here we are." Anakin said with some relief.
"I need your help." Leia said to Anakin. "I need your help contacting Luke."
"I intend to." Anakin replied.
Anakin's form shifted, his form that once looked luminous, seemed to almost be a trick of the light, no longer looking ethereal.
"You look surprised…Leia." Anakin tried.
"I just – I wasn't expecting—you-r sitting." Leia stammered.
"I thought it might put you at ease." Anakin replied.
"I just never thought ghosts would need to sit down before." Memories of Alderaan flooded back to Leia. Of the times when she was a young girl and she was told of tales of the Republic that was. And stories and tales of Alderaan's past. Leia remembered how intently she would listen to the ghost stories. And now, here a ghost stood before her.
Leia felt a hand, his hand on her shoulder. And then she recalled the sensation of a strong metal hand take hold of her shoulder, and pulled her back. She still could feel the force of his pull. And watching – watching Alderann die. The images of Hosnian Prime's destruction.
Leia called out as if waking from a dream, seeing Anakin's hand hovering near her shoulder.
"This isn't going to work if you allow your mind to become so clouded." Anakin said. Leia pushed Anakin's hand away and got up. She froze. Did she really just push the hand of a ghost away? Anakin stood, memories of training Ahsoka coming to his mind.
"I'm not as strong as Luke." Leia said.
"No. You're stronger. I know if you had allowed yourself to be fully trained by Luke, you more than likely would be his equal. If not more."
If you will not turn to the Dark Side, then perhaps she will.
"Never!" Leia whispered. She turned around, expecting Vader to be there. Only Anakin appeared to her vision.
"I'm sorry. His – Vader - - The shadows of my actions follow me. They – haunt me." Anakin explained. "Rather my actions as Vader echo through me."
Leia's mouth went dry. She was suddenly unsure of herself and her eyes became glassy. She looked around and suddenly found herself back in the cell on the Death Star. Anakin's visage seemed to ache.
"This is the chasm between us." Anakin said. Leia looked back speechless.
"We not really here." Leia gulped out.
"No. No, we are still in your quarters. But it is what stands in the way of your goal to contact Luke. And it is what prevents me from helping you."
The wail of a baby came to both their ears next.
"Is that – is that us? Luke and me?
"No." Anakin hesitated to answer, "It is your son. He also is – an obstacle." Anakin replied.
"What – I don't know what to do." Leia asked.
"You must learn control." Anakin replied.
You must unlearn what you have learned. The voice of Yoda said between them. Anakin realized it was a reminder to him.
Leia's mind was awash, she did not understand these sayings and Force visions. She wished she did not have to deal with them at all. The Force, her son, her life. What pain it had unleashed across the universe.
"My sins are my sins, Leia. It is not for you and Luke to be the ones to carry them."
Leia looked back incredulously, "You are my burden. Your legacy was something Luke and I had to deal with. We thought that we could stamp it out. We thought we could make the galaxy whole again. But look."
The two of them saw before them Snoke and Kylo Ren – The First Order. And all that stood between and them and victory was -Leia, a General – a survivor from a dead world, and her will to resist.
"You have more at your disposal than you realize, Leia. Don't underestimate the Force." Anakin said. Leia looked back wide eye. "I was like you, Leia. I saw myself as the only thing, the one thing that could bring order to a galaxy gone mad. But I was arrogant." Anakin paused, hearing Obi-Wan from the past and hearing him through the whispers of the Force.
"I was arrogant, proud. I believed that all rested on my shoulders. I turned on the very people who shared my struggles. You have not. You have not. You are my better, Leia."
Leia released a breath, "I don't know what is going to happen? It's not like last time. And now, I'm so alone and I've become so old in this long, long struggle."
Without the Jedi, there can be no balance in the Force. Leia turned to her left at hearing the echo of the voice of her friend Lor San Tekka.
"You are not alone in this struggle, my daughter. You have led bravely and brought others to your side."
"But what will happen? I don't know what will happen?"
"Only the will of the Force. That must be your guide."
"But I'm no Jedi." Leia protested.
"But you are. You have been blessed and imbued with talents and wisdom of ages. You need only reach out and use those skills, Leia. For it will be the wisdom of the Jedi and not the will of politicians who will bring an end to the current crisis."
Leia narrowed her eyes down and then looked back up into the eyes of her father, "The galaxy needs the Jedi." Leia said.
"Now you are beginning to understand." Anakin said.
"No." Leia replied, "to believe."
Fail she will not. Yoda said through the Force.
"Then you know what must be done." Anakin said as he raised his hands on either side of Leia's head. Leia closed her eyes, breathed and cleared her mind. She listened for her father's thoughts and he for hers.
"Concentrate." Anakin encouraged. "Concentrate."
Ahch-To
"Luke."
"Father." Luke replied with a mix of surprise and fascination, the same way he had when he first heard his father call to him.
"Son, you are needed."
"Father –"
"Listen not to me. But Leia." Anakin replied.
"Leia!" Luke whispered.
"Luke, it's me." Leia said through the Force. "Rey – is she–." Leia quickly asked.
"She is here." Luke replied. "She is…extraordinary."
"She is. Teach her, Luke! And then come back. The First Order is…"
"I know, Leia. We'll be coming–and Rey will be ready. We both will. Mark my words."
The connection ended and Luke stood staring into space, looking into the energetic waves of the Force. "Leia." Luke whispered.
"Master Skywalker?" Rey asked.
"It's alright, Rey. Continue with your exercises. There will be much to do and we have a long way to go."
Leia's Quarters
"We did it!" Leia exclaimed.
"No, you did it. I just – pointed you in the right direction." Anakin replied.
"He'll come." Leia said with restored hope.
"There was no need to doubt. Now, you must redouble your efforts, Leia. You must make the way for the last Jedi to return and help the galaxy."
"I understand." Leia said. The two of them stood in silence for a moment.
"Father." Leia said. Anakin looked back stunned mixed with amazement, almost dumb founded.
"Father." Leia said again, almost in bewilderment. She was surprised that she could finally say it. "Thank you."
"Remember, the Force will be with you. Always." Anakin said as he began to fade.
"Will you…come again?" Leia asked.
Anakin smiled, "When you need me most. You've just taken a great step into a larger world. Trust in yourself and the Force. And I'll always be…I'll always…." Anakin said as he faded back into the ripples of the Force.
"Just as I enter a room." Leia finished for him as the room went silent. Leia stood for some time in contemplation. She breathed. The way ahead was long. And the Rebels would need their general. She –Leia Organa. A Skywalker. A Solo. A soldier. A mother. A Jedi. A general. A woman of hope.
"Luke." Leia whispered, "The both of you return to my side soon. Peace and justice must be restored."
Leia moved to her dressing table, retrieved her blaster and belt. She clipped it on and stared at the valuables that were on the table. Her eyes next moved to a small draw. She reached and opened it. Inside were the pieces of a lightsaber. It looked similar to Luke's. The pieces of a task that had been left unfinished. She reached in, took hold of the pieces and fit them together, locking them in place.
Holding the weapon up, Leia's thoughts lingered on it. A choice to be made. She pressed the button and ignited the blade. Leia's room lit up with green light. She admired it for a long moment.
Switching it off, Leia then attached it to her belt and then threw her grey cloak around herself, concealing the weapon. She turned for the door. The Resistance now had a Jedi General to lead it. Leia walked out and headed for the bridge of her command ship.
End.