The stale coffee that Alex Romero sipped religiously wasn't nearly enough to soothe the throbbing of his mind as his eyes scanned the piles of nonsensical photographs. These images of stomach-turning abrasions and wounds were enough to haunt anyone for life if they came unprepared. But for Alex they were just another piece of what White Pine Bay, Oregon had to offer him on a daily basis.
What time is it? He rubbed his eyes deeply and held his wrist away from his face until the small numbers on his watch came into focus.
Another early morning in an empty station. He sighed in exhaustion and stood up reluctantly. He was no use in this state. His mind and body needed rest and then he could come back and figure all of it out.
Alex shrugged into his leather jacket and shut the lights of his office off, taking one last look at his messy desk. With another deep breath he left it behind; the stress, the chaos, the puzzle that tormented him. But it wasn't the daunting qualities of the task that followed him away even when he left. It was the reminder minute after minute that someone was done wrong with no resolve. Someone's family longed for answers and justice that he could not give them yet.
He shut his door slowly and shook his head at his feet.
Time to move on for the night and maybe even feed himself so he could sleep a few hours before the little hand hit seven again.
His truck was cold the entire drive home, his breath visible in the air around him. He flipped on the radio to fill the silence that his thoughts always filled with more work but the sound of a familiar tune changed his stream of consciousness from distressed to nostalgic.
The melancholy tunes of Steve Miller Band's Wild Horses drew him back to a place where waist-high grass and wildflowers grew around him. The sounds of crickets and chirping birds were white noise compared to the harmonious laughter that carried on through the warm summer breeze. The faint shape of her rushing out in front of him, reaching for his hand pulled on his heartstrings and right before his fingers were about to tangle up with hers he snapped back into reality at the change of music.
Alex clenched his jaw as he sighed for air and continued pulling into his driveway, like nothing had happened. Because nothing abnormal had happened after all. He was used to these phantoms visiting him throughout his days. For the past five years he had grown to expect them and even sometimes he would welcome them at his lonely moments. Sometimes he drank to summon them and become deeply involved. At his lowest, most inebriated moments he could pretend he was still there in that place with her, his whole world right there at his fingertips in the form of a beautiful girl…
Alex peeled his uniform shirt away from his sweaty skin and threw it into his truck hastily, the thrill of seeing a plate full of food and a cold beer pulling him toward the house. He heard the sound of the Lockhart's old television blaring like usual. The Mariner's game was always on when it could be.
The smell of fresh cut grass was one that hadn't been around in a while since Wyatt had been on a partying streak for the past year. But the front yard beamed with its new facelift, mowed lawn, painted porch and planted flowers to boot.
Alex saw Wyatt lounging in one of the two old recliners as soon as he stepped through the door and they both exchanged friendly smiles.
"Look what the cat brought in this time." He offered his hand out and Wyatt rose to give a side hug in return.
"Yeah, yeah. Gotta check in on things sooner than later before I head back into the woods."
"Of course. You say hey to Evie yet?" Alex wandered into the kitchen to grab a couple beers and get back to the couch to share one with Wyatt. "You know she talks about you all of the damn time."
"Shit!" Wyatt ignored his question to curse at the rotating teams on the television screen.
"Speaking of Evie…where's she at?"
Alex waited for him to answer this time, genuinely concerned in where she was so he could give her that kiss he never got to that morning for lack of time before work.
"I don't know, man." Wyatt shifted uncomfortably and chugged his beer effortlessly, crinkling the can in his fist when it was finished.
"What do you mean you don't know? She was off at noon today…It's six o'clock."
He got up and shuffled up the stairs to check her room.
"Hey baby, I'm home, come watch the game with us." He knocked his knuckles up against the closed door to her bedroom and waited to hear her shift around on the other side. "Baby, what are you doing in there?"
Alex opened the door slowly and peaked around to search her bed or her desk where she usually rested at in her private time. But to his dismay there was no sign of her there.
He pulled his phone from his pocket and pressed the speed dial for Rocky's urgently, scanning her room for any sign that she'd been around at all that day. He flipped through the papers on her desk as the ringtone ended and Rocky's deep voice answered.
"Hey Rock, it's Alex. Any chance Evelyn's working overtime right now?"
"Uh, nah nah. Her shift ended at noon today. Think she barely worked til then."
"Right…" He turned away from the drawers he'd left open in her desk and sighed. "You seen her since then?"
"Haven't seen her. There a problem, kid?"
Alex hesitated to answer as he saw from across the room that the drawers to her dresser were all disheveled and hanging open sloppily. He remained silent as he approached the telling scene with heavy, reluctant steps. And just as he came closer he saw what he was hoping he wouldn't; the bottom of each empty drawer that had held her pieces of clothing just a day before.
"Did she mention anything about going out of town, Rocky? Take any vacation time or…anthing?"
Alex swallowed nervously and cast his gaze on the door that led to her closet. The silence on the other end was almost as dreadful as the suspicion of what lied on the other side of that door.
"Rock?"
He squeezed his eyes closed and grabbed the handle as Rocky sighed shamefully. Alex could just about see him rubbing his eyes in defeat.
"Alex, look, kid. She told me not to say anything but she looked awful wound up."
He opened the closet finally and nodded, the truth hitting him when he saw the lonely wire hangers that used to be filled with her sun dresses and hats and scarves. He hung up unannounced and hurried back to the living room frantically.
"Where the fuck did she go, Wyatt?"
Alex stared at him through narrowed eyes and chuckled dryly as Wyatt shrugged in response.
"Oh, really, Wyatt? You think I'm gonna buy that shit? You show up out of nowhere, clean the place up and stick around this long? Why? You're excited to see me? That's bull shit. You knew something was up. Tell me what the fuck happened."
"Alex, take it down a few notches, alright? You can't act like you didn't see this coming."
"Do you see this right now? You think I saw this coming?"
Wyatt stood up and squeezed his fist together to compose himself.
"Oh knock that shit off, Alex! She called me crying about how you weren't coming around as much and how you liked your work more than you liked her. You broke her fucking heart every time you worked late. You know that, Alex! She told me she begged you just to spend more time with her. Really, you made her beg you for anything? And then you promise her shit will change and you just keep doing that to her?"
Alex's heart raged in his chest, threatening to explode if he stood there any longer sulking in his anger. Wyatt threw his arms in the air and paced in and out of the kitchen with a new beer.
"Where did she go, Wyatt?"
"You're high if you think I'm gonna let you chase her."
"Oh now you wanna be a big brother, huh? Like you never just abandoned her to go get stoned and chop down the damned trees down while she needed you?"
"Ok, I get it, man! I was a coward when I really needed to be a man. And you bail my ass out of knee deep hell every time I get myself into it but let's stop dwelling on that shit and face reality." Wyatt stepped closer and closer to Alex with every word, towering over him while he too became enraged. "You really think you're protecting her any more than I ever have by stopping her now? You think it's better for her to be stuck here in this place with all of these memories just waiting for you to get home in the morning and go back to work so that she can deal with it all by herself? Well, you're fucking wrong, man. She's not yours to keep, she never will be!"
Alex shoved past Wyatt and out to the front porch stairs where he sat in defeat, stroking head back and forth to regain composure over his breathing. He closed his eyes and tried to avoid scheming to figure out where she was. Wyatt was right. She couldn't be there under his own regulations and conditions. He couldn't keep her caged up all to himself in a place where all of her demons haunted her wherever she went. He just tried to block the fact that they hadn't completely appreciated each other's presence the few weeks before. He tried not to think about how he'd rejected her and how he'd ignored the signs leading up to this moment that he ached in.
"So what now?" He asked Wyatt when he came to join him after a few minutes of silence.
His old friend spit his chew spit over the rail into the freshly maintained planter of daisies and shook his head.
"You know, beats the hell outta me. You know there ain't no point of me bein' here now. This place haunts me just as much as it haunts Eve. Her being gone ain't much easier for me either, you know that. So I'm goin to Alaska. Got myself hooked up with a fishin' rig out of Kodiak."
Alex sighed and leaned up against the railing, locking his sight on a pair of swallows that flew above the trees on the edge of the property. They were clueless to the situation, soaring around freely and beautifully regardless of the way his world was rocking.
"Isn't that just dandy."
Wyatt spit again and twirled his keys around his finger.
"You know, this place ain't too good for you either, friend. You really oughta get out while you can. Stop trying to save everyone. You need it just as bad as the rest of us, like it or not."
He walked down the stairs slowly and strolled down the graveled walkway, contemplating something behind his squinty eyes.
"But hey, the Mariners won! So it's a good day…Take care of yourself, Alex."
Alex licked the corner of his mouth without taking his focus away from the birds. Somehow, let alone the dozens of times he'd gotten Wyatt out of trouble, the guy was still better off than he was.
Wyatt's truck left a cloud of dust too thick to see through. And while the rumbling of his motor became softer and softer in the distance a steady rain began to fall in White Pine Bay.