Another Tag! I know I'm late, what can I say?

I do not own The Mentalist

Episode Tag 7x04: Black Market

Jane woke startled not knowing where he was or what had awoken him. He just knew his head was pounding and his bones ached. Luckily his throat didn't hurt that much which was an improvement.

Adjusting his eyes to the dim light coming from one of the windows of the airstream he sharpened his ears listening to the sound of footsteps and the door opening. He smiled and raised his head. Bad idea. Now the room was spinning around. He groaned exasperated and lied down again.

"That bad, uh?" Lisbon's amused voice greeted him from the door "Do you want something to eat?"

Jane opened his eyes again watching her taking off her jacket and rummaging in the small kitchen, opening cabinets and putting down some of the things she had carried with her. Lots of things. He snorted, she seemed to believe he was stuck in the middle of a snowstorm for the quantity of food she had brought.

"I'm not really hungry" He managed to get out without sneezing although his voice cracked at the end.

"What about some eggs and a cup of tea with honey? I bought your favorite flavor"

Lisbon was sure what his response was going to be so, trying to tempt him, had supplied the little kitchen with as many treats for him as possible. She paused as an unexpected thought popped into her mind, now she could take care of him openly. She was so used to watch silently, hoping to do more than just throwing some painkillers and ordering him to take them, but knowing that he would never allow her to be closer…

Jane frowned reading her face and posture carefully, a tea box in her hands, an unsure expression on her face now. Obviously she had already decided she was going to take care of him. Whether if he liked or not. He chuckled inwardly at this stubborn woman and admitted defeat graciously.

"That would be very nice. Thank you"

Lisbon blinked as if suddenly aware she had spaced out and smiled at him obviously pleased. He could swear she was even blushing as she bit her lower lip and nodding started to get out pans and pots.

"And how are you feeling?"

"Right as rain. False alarm" She called over her shoulder.

Jane's eyes followed her movements. It was in Lisbon's nature to look after people and she had always had a soft spot for him. Back in the CBI he always tried to look carefree but sometimes he couldn't fool her. Jane always noticed her hovering when he needed her most, when his thin façade had too many cracks to disguise it with flashing tricks and dazzling smiles, when he was depressed or ill or sad. Well, he noticed when he wasn't self-centered planning his revenge or absorbed in self-punishment or self-pity or hatred. Pick the merrier one, he chuckled without humor. She thought he would mock or reject her back then if she showed that she cared…which was probably what would have happened. He couldn't accept her love then, he needed to focus and she would have been a distraction. His current thought also was that he deserved all the pain he could get so, which punishment could be better than wallow in pain and despair when he could easily reach out to her and feel better?

Besides she didn't deserve to be dragged down with him. In fact he needed her not to be dragged. All was bearable at the end of the day if she was safe, and this need started to be almost compulsive near the end. She had always been his anchor, his moral compass, his only connection to the real world. A world outside him, where people had jobs they liked or not, formed families and their only worry was to pay the rent at the end of the month.

He sighed loudly at the thought and Lisbon stopped what she was doing for looking at him sideways, covertly. He just waved at her and arched an eyebrow mischievously, making her blush and, shocking her head, she returned to the task at hand.

Lisbon glanced once more to him, stretched lazily on the bed with his suit rumpled, his eyes following her every move openly, and returned her eyes to the stove. She felt a little unsure and although she was glad Jane had accepted her help, she didn't want to overstep it.

She put the water to boil and grabbed a small pan, her thoughts far away. Of course he had accepted her help sometimes in the past but…just in cases, not in something personal. Well sometimes in that too, but just when he hadn't had any other options left, and now it felt so good and refreshing being able to do something for him without making up excuses, just because she could. Jane was really opening up to her, and that was something she'd always wanted and never believed possible, even last night… where was this coming from? Leaving the FBI?

She opened the door of the fridge with more force than necessary, finding the eggs. She had never thought about leaving law enforcement. For Good's sake, she had always been a cop! What else was she supposed to do?

Jane continued staring at her from the bed shamelessly, his arms now behind his head for a better view, his mind blank for a moment, absorbing, learning. And enjoying it, because he never thought he would be part of this again. The domesticity made his heart ache. In a good way.

He hadn't realized how numb and detached his existence was, not really, until these little moments with Lisbon started to fulfill his life again. He craved them. Now he had a full new catalogue of Lisbon's expressions and tells to join the old one and he couldn't wait to add more. The best thing was that he could join her if he wanted although it felt so surreal still that sometimes he had to remind himself that. In their first weeks together he had been a little afraid of joining her in these simple things, he didn't know how to act normally because, before, he just had allowed himself to watch from the safety of his couch. He had forgotten what it was to want and to be able to act on it. He had forgotten how to act like a normal human being. Now they could create moments together.

He felt his eyes prickling and a tight knot in his throat.

"Do you feel worse? " Lisbon asked concerned "Do you need something?"

Jane just shocked his head not trusting his voice and smiled reassuringly. She frowned and nodded doubtfully but still kept an eye on him, giving the final touches to their breakfast.

He was not going to lose this. Never again. Last night he had scared himself, and her, with his suggestion though, he supposed it was the fever talking. But as soon as the words left his mouth he had realized that the thought of leaving the FBI had been at the back of his mind for a while. This was something he wanted. He had made her think about it too, and he just hoped he hadn't scared her. Being a cop was an essential part of Lisbon and he wouldn't want to stop her from doing what she loved. But there was so much more in life…

Jane sighed again and closed his eyes. He had talked too soon, without a real plan in mind. He would have to wait now until she brought the subject herself. The seeds where already there and knowing her, surely she was already weighting the pros and cons. One thing he was sure of. It would be her decision, he just had suggested other possibilities. A less dangerous ones, his mind supplied treacherously and he silenced the thought with a shiver.

"Jane?"

He flinched and opened his eyes startled when he noticed Lisbon's hand on his forefront. She sat next to him on the bed and, chewing her lower lip, tried to feel if he was still running a fever, her other hand on her own forehead. Jane felt his eyes moistening, it felt like a lifetime since someone had taken care of him. He didn't even remember when it was. He felt...loved.

He took the hand on his forefront with one of his and bringing it to his lips kissed her palm softly, the smile she couldn't see on his lips reaching his eyes.

"Is there anything you need?" She asked concerned, her voice low and deep.

Jane stared at her green eyes, thinking how in hell he had been so lucky again, and nodding he released her hand and opened his arms to her.

Lisbon flinched startled and, softening her gaze, lifted the corner of her lips taking in his smile and his serene eyes. Kicking her shoes she leant slowly towards him, curling against his side, her head on his chest just above his heart, her left hand resting on his shirt.

Jane sighed in content and, skimming a hand under her red shirt, wrapped her waist with his palm, his fingers under the waistband of her slacks just above her hipbone, his other hand on her arm, placing her on top of him.

"Better?" She teased brushing his collarbone over his shirt with two fingers.

"You always make everything better" Jane murmured against her hair and felt her cuddling closer against his body.

Lisbon just hummed, relaxing, and continued tracing his collarbone, this time her fingertips on his warm skin. They stayed like this in perfect silence until Lisbon broke it again, her voice muffled against his shirt.

"You need to eat your breakfast before it gets cold"

"I need you more"

"You're a sweet talker you know?"

"It's the fever talking. I have absolutely no control over it" He teased

She pinched his neck with two fingers making him chuckle. His tone turned serious suddenly.

"Stay with me"

"I have to work, I'll come back later to check on you"

He shook his head and Lisbon raised hers to look at him, now serious and with a hint of hope in his eyes. A question.

"Stay with me" He repeated separating the words, brushing his fingertips over her spine slowly, back and forth. There was an edge of a plea in his voice, his eyes looking for answers in hers. Something he wasn't saying, something important that he didn't dare to ask…

Lisbon scanned his face trying to understand, unruly blond curls, hopeful eyes, lips parted, the sun outside lightened up his features with a soft warm… until it clicked. With teary eyes, she brushed his cheekbone with one finger, his eyes never leaving her face.

"Always" She whispered

Jane broadened his grin making her smile back and, cupping her cheek carefully, guided her face to the crock of his neck. Closing his eyes. Holding her against him. Tightly.

"I don't need anything else then"