So this is for nooowestayandgetcaught over on tumblr. THANKS BBY, I HOPE YOU LIKE IT :)
I had to add Roy in here.
five stages of grief
Nobody thought he would die like this.
It's sad, heartbreaking how Wally West dies. He was just too slow.
i. denial
Roll, place on tray. Roll, place on tray. Roll, place on tray.
M'Gann continues her mantra, rolling the cookie dough, and then placing it on the tray. Piles of burnt and under-cooked cookies are around her, piled on top of each other or in containers. She smiles at Black Canary as she walks into the room, a frown on her face.
"M'Gann…what are you doing?"
The Martian grins, but it doesn't reach her eyes. "I'm making cookies for Wally. Those ones didn't turn out very good. He'll want something good when we go visit him in the hospital later."
The older woman stills, her eyes lock on M'Gann. "M'Gann you- you're not going to see Wally."
Crushing down the thoughts that immediately plague her mind, M'Gann shakes her head. "I know not now. We're not allowed to see him yet. I mean like, tomorrow or the next day."
Black Canary clears her throat then places a hand on M'Gann's green one, stilling the girl's movement. Looking up, M'Gann smiles.
"Sweetheart, listen-"
"Oh goodness!" M'Gann interrupts, swiveling around to look at the oven, those are done- I hope they aren't burnt…"
She moves to the oven quickly, opening the oven by hand, and then levitating the tray out. It's placed down on the stove.
"M'Gann, Wally isn't at the hospital."
Heart pounding, M'Gann turns around with a smile, "where is he then?"
Black Canary has pretty eyes, M'Gann thinks, ignoring the older woman's words. She doesn't need to hear where Wally is. She already knows. He's at the hospital, eating hospital food to his heart's content. M'Gann is so wound up in her own pleasant thoughts that she doesn't notice Black Canary move to the stove and steal a cookie.
"You understand, don't you?" Black Canary asks, taking a small bite of the cookie. M'Gann nods absently, watching as the blonde eats the cookie. "Is it good? I want Wally to like them. I know he doesn't really like the burnt ones."
"You never answered my question. You understand that Wally…well that Wally died, don't you?"
She doesn't say anything. She can't. Instead, she nods quickly, and Black Canary excuses herself from the room. Before she leaves however, she looks over her shoulder, nodding at M'Gann. "By the way, these cookies are great. Best you've made yet."
The door shuts behind her, and tears leak down her face. M'Gann knows Wally's dead. It's just easier pretending that he isn't.
ii. anger
Anger seems to be something always present in Connor's life.
It's always there in the back of his mind, always itching to come forth and he usually summons it when he's fighting or training. Black Canary said you had to control anger. Don't let it control you.
Lately, however, anger seems to control him a lot.
His fists pound against the punching bag, specially made for him. He suspects that if he weren't invulnerable, his fists would be bloody and broken.
bloody and broken like wally-
He clenches his fists, shuts his eyes, and punches the bag again. "I hate you," his voice is low and rough, almost animalistic. Sweat drips from his bangs into his face, but he ignores it. "You promised me things."
"we'll show you the moon and superman!"
His throat bobs with each word, and his stomach feels uneasy. "I never got to repay you," he hisses, finger nails digging into his skin. He wishes he could feel the pain, feel the skin break across his knuckles, feel his bones crunch under the constant punches he throws at the punching bag. He wishes he could feel something other than anger.
The emotion floods through him, drowning the clone. He's aware of someone else's presence in the room, someone strong like him. Someone who should be here holding him and telling him that things happen for a reason. He's happy Superman is here, because then the older man can see how broken his clone is. How utterly unhappy and angry and broken Superboy is.
Pain, the physical kind (not emotional, because shit, he doesn't think he can take any more of that) is something he wishes he understood.
But wishing never does anything for anyone.
"You're lying," Roy hisses, eyes narrowing dangerously. His fingers twitch, aching for his bow and a few arrows so he could shoot them through his heart.
Ollie shakes his head, scratching at the blonde hair there. "I wish I were."
He's seething. Roy can feel the pain and the anger and the pure and absolute hatred rush forward, and he sees red. "Get out."
"Roy, son-"
"Get the fuck out of my apartment now." He yells, and Ollie stands, moving towards the door.
"Funeral is Saturday. You should be there." Ollie says, shutting the door. Seconds later, four arrows lodge themselves in the wood.
iii. bargaining
"Can't you do anything?"
Artemis paces around, hands clasped tightly behind her back. "I know he's- was, he was- annoying, but can't you just…bring him back?"
Exhaling loudly, she stops, crossing her arms over her chest. "Or at least give us time. Send us back in time so we can stop this!"
She exhales slowly, "Please, please help us."
She didn't hate Wally, not in the least. She liked fighting with him, it was her favorite thing about the team, because Wally didn't take her shit, and she wouldn't take his, so they got at each other.
"There are so…so many things-" her voice cracks, and she flushes bright red. "I never told him I was sorry."
She always said mean things. They were awful and cruel and she won't ever know if he took them to heart, because well…
"He's dead, and you are the only fucking thing that can save him."
"Fate doesn't work like that," a voice tells her, and she knows that he's already tried this. Already tried saving Wally.
Her knees feel like jelly, and she sinks to them, eyes still on the golden helmet. "Why?" She murmurs, leaning into Roy as he puts his arm around her shoulders. "Why'd he have to die?"
"Don't know," Roy mutters. "But Fate certainly won't help you find out."
iv. depression
"He won't put it down."
Bruce's voice is there, so is Alfred's, but Dick doesn't pay attention. His hands tighten on the suit, the yellow and red. He won't let go. Wally asked him not to.
Dick can still remember Wally's death. It's painted in his mind bright as day, clear and real and cruel.
"It hurts," tears drip down Wally's face, mixing with snot. Another sob tears through him, followed by a low yell. People crowd around them, calling nine-one-one, screaming and offering assistance. Dick absently wonders what happened to his other friends, but his main focus is on Wally.
Dick carefully avoids looking at the bone protruding from Wally's leg, ignores the blood seeping into the knees of his uniform. "I know dude. It'll feel better soon, don't worry."
"I'm gonna die," Wally chokes out, blood dripping from his lip. Dick shakes his head quickly, gingerly grabbing Wally's hand. The boy's arm is bent at an odd angle, and Dick can tell that if they manage to get Wally back alive- they will, they will- then the boy will never be able to walk again.
"Don't say shit like that," Dick murmurs, his finger ghosting across Wally's cheek, the only place that isn't covered with blood. "Stop talking. You'll feel better."
How did this happen? They were driving…Wally was driving- how did he get on the street? Dick can see the car ahead of them- the one that hit them- the blood on the windshield, and he glances behind him watching as Artemis drags herself from the backseat. Connor is still in the back, eyes closed. M'Gann is trying to wake him up, from what Dick can see, while Artemis pulls herself towards Kaldur, who lies on the concrete motionless. Dick's mind races, but Wally's voice breaks him out of thought. "I can't feel my legs."
Sobs choke the boy (boys) and Wally shakes his head awkwardly, "I can't feel them…"
"It'll be okay," Dick promises, nodding. "You'll be fine. You'll run again."
How did this happen? They were driving and the people, they were speeding towards them and Wally was too slow. So why isn't Dick hurt? A throb in his head reminds him that he has a long cut along his hairline.
Dick removes his hand from Wally's for a second, but the boy before him cries harder, "Don't let go."
Nodding again, Dick grips Wally's hand. He's never seen the speedster like this. He's never been so scared. Not even when his parents died. Sirens sound in the distance, and he hopes they get there in time- they have to get there on time.
Wally breathes deeply, eyelids drooping, and even though Dick tells him over and over again to wake up, the speedster merely gives him a blood-stained smile.
"They found him holding his hand, Master Bruce. The boy has been through…I can't even explain it." Dick ignores Alfred's grief-laced voice.
When the ambulance and the fire fighters and the police come, Dick watches as the arrest the drunk driver who hit them. He thinks about how he hates this man now, more than he's hated anybody in a long time. He watches as they remove the people from the car. His friends are being lifted onto stretchers and put into the ambulance, and his phone buzzes in his pocket and oh god…Wally's stopped moving.
He has to be restrained as they try and revive the speedster. He watches as The Flash runs by the scene, staring in horror as they cover his nephew's head with a sheet-
"Dick?"
The boy in question glances up, his dull eyes meeting Bruce's.
"Dick, are you…are you alright?"
No, he's not alright. His best friend just died. He just watches his best friend die. He held his best friends hand as he died.
"You need to shower. Alfred will wash the suit—"
"No!" Dick's voice shocks Bruce, but he clenches his jaw and gives Dick a firm look. "I know it's important to you—"
"No, I told him I wouldn't let go, okay? I told him I wouldn't let go…" his breaths come out in short gasps, tears blur his visions.
"I let go," he whispers, leaning into Bruce's embrace. "I let go and now he's dead…"
"It's not your fault," Bruce tells him, patting his back. "You couldn't have done anything. You sat with him, you sat with him while he died, and you were there. That's all he could have asked for."
"I wish I could have done more," is Dick's muffled response.
"I know."
v. acceptance
It's strange.
Kaldur hates the men who did this to his friends, who did this to him, to Wally, but he isn't denying that Wally died, like M'Gann, or getting angry about it like Superboy or Roy. He understands that Wally is dead. He understands that people die. Sometimes you may think it isn't for a good reason or that it may be in vain, but it's not.
Kaldur doesn't quite understand the gods or God of this culture. He knows who they are, what most of them do, and who supports each one, but he is unsure of their intentions. Surely they don't give life so they may take it away whenever they feel the need. He believes people are put here to do well, and when they've done all that they can to make a difference in the world, they are taken away, granted entrance to an even better world.
Kaldur hopes only the best for his fallen friend. And he knows that his friends do too.
The team huddles around the tomb stone.
WALLACE RUDOLPH WEST 1997-2011,
HERO, SON, NEPHEW, FRIEND
HE WILL FOREVER BE IN OUR HEARTS
Each hero says something, each tells Wally about their lives now, and how it's different without him. Roy is there too, now a member of Young Justice.
The Atlantian decides that things happen for a reason, and you can't know answers about death, because they are so beyond the intellect of this world. All he knows is that there is something out there, something better, and Wally West may not be the last or the first, but he's experiencing a new journey now.
If you don't understand how Wally died, it was from a drunk driver. I watched a video earlier today about drinking and driving, and it was extremely emotional and really had an affect on me. Also, I apologize for bad grammar/continuity or anything else you see thats wrong in this.
If you liked it enough to favourite, please review :)