Suse held tightly to him in the dark of the night, knowing nothing and no one could hurt her as long as he was around. His smile was sweet and beautiful in the dim light of the moon filtering in through the canopy of leaves above. She felt so at peace to be there with him.
"Suse, you will get into trouble if you stay out too late."
"I'm not worried."
"I am. I'll take you home."
"Please don't."
"But you know the consequences of staying out this long after dark."
"I do, but I don't care. I'd rather be dead than be away from you."
"Don't ever, ever say that again. Do you understand?"
"Yes."
"Now let's go. I'm taking you home, to safety."
"Okay."
As they neared the home of Suse's parents, she became quiet. He stopped and faced her.
"Suse, I would die if anything happened to you. I love you too much to let you get hurt. Please understand."
"I do. I love you, too."
He gave her a swift, gentle kiss and waited until she was inside. She glanced back and saw him still standing there. Finally, she closed the door on the image of him at the end of the sidewalk. Mama and Papa were sitting in the living room, still awake and obviously waiting for Suse to come home.
"Where have you been?"
"Sorry, Mama. I lost track of time."
"Do you know how dangerous it is for us to be outside during times like these?"
"Yes, Papa. I was being careful."
"Just go to bed. We will discuss this in the morning."
"Suse?"
"Yes, Mama?"
"You were with that Gustav boy again, weren't you?"
"Yes, Mama."
The nights grew colder as the nightmares became reality. Stories played through the radio were too gruesome to comprehend; days were filled with terrible periods of silence and dread. Suse could hardly stand the waiting, but even she preferred it to what came next.
"I can no longer come by, Suse," Gustav whispered to her as they hid behind an overgrown bush that had escaped its daily torture of being pruned and trimmed; the Johannsens had been deported to a safe area of Russia, away from the horrible impending events.
"But, Gustav, I cannot live without you."
"I'm so sorry. You'll never know how much I love you."
Suse's tears soaked the collar of the young man's shirt. In the faint light, he could see the outline of the Star of David, Jew inscribed. He felt proud of them, rather than feeling ashamed. He was guilty only of loving her, and she was accused of the same. Together they were alone, but alone, they were half-dead.
"Gustav, please don't forget me."
"I can and will not."
"I love you with all of my heart."
"Take this. I want you to know I'm always with you."
Her trembling fingers gathered the photograph and necklace. Her brown eyes were filled with tears as he latched the chain around her throat. The beautiful blue pendant was plain, but it meant the world to her.
"I love you so much," he whispered fiercely.
"I love you, too. I will forever think of you."
"I will be waiting until we meet again."
That was the last time Suse ever saw Gustav in so personal and intimate a manner. When they saw each other on the street, she would step down, and he would pass by. He always saw the pain in her eyes; he wished to take it away, to bear all the burden of their secret, if only to see her smile and hear her laugh in the same carefree way he fell in love with. She could see nothing in his stare, for his walls were built up again. After every run-in, she would go home and weep bitterly-but quietly-into her pillow until she fell asleep.
...
"Mama! Papa!"
A hard hand slapped Suse back from following her parents, and Gustav's jaw set imperceptibly. No one was to hit her. Not even Hitler himself. Suse's face was covered in tears as she whispered to herself, over and over. Finally, it was her turn to be loaded into the truck. She caught the look Gustav tossed her, and his message rang clear. She clenched her teeth, raised her head, and stemmed the tears.
"I will take care of them," he murmured softly as he slammed the door shut.
She nodded in the dark, too late for him to see, and said, "Please do."
"Suse?"
"Be quiet!"
"Oh, Liesl! They got you, too?"
"Yes. . .This can't be happening."
"But it is," she whispered before the door opened.
"Suse, unless you want to die, shut your mouth. Please. For me." Gustav raised his voice to a yell, "Now be quiet!"
Suse mouthed the words, "I love you" and a pained expression flitted across his face. He nodded curtly and shut the door once more. Liesl's hand found Suse's in the inky interior, and they remained, palms together, until they reached their destination.
She flinched at the sight of young boys and girls falling to the ground. She cringed when the sound of the guns met her ears. This became daily routine. Eventually, she quit reacting.
¾¾¾¾¾¾¾¾¾¾
"Promise me something, Suse," Liesl whispered later that night as they laid on the frozen ground, their makeshift beds.
"What is that?"
"If I die, you will carry on. You must."
"You will not die. We will get through this together, alive."
"It is a hypothetical situation."
Suse sighed. "I promise to go on with life i-if you d-d-d-die."
"I'll go on if you die, too."
"If you die, I might as well die too."
"You still have your parents and the carrier of your heart."
"Gustav!"
"Suse, I am trying to keep you and Liesl alive. It's difficult if you choose to ignore my warnings. Please quit talking. I am begging you. You are lucky. Don't lose that fortune."
"I am sorry, Gustav."
"Be silent."
Gustav walked through the bodies back to his tent. Suse hugged herself in an attempt to gain body heat; Liesl remained, noiseless, not daring to sleep in the cold quiet. The foreboding wind seemed to be carrying the hushed screams cut short by icy streaks of metal. Suse and Liesl knew that their sole existence could be ended with only one shot.
...
Suse saw Gustav walking near and longed to reach for him. He strode past briskly, cursing the sight of pain evident in her eyes. Damn the fates. Her freezing hand brushed against his own warm palm, and his heart lurched. Her once full, red lips were now a light blue-purple, and her face held the strain of starvation and long days marching through bitter weather. She was sleep-deprived; that much was apparent, and he could see and feel her heartbreak.
One evening, long after the others had lain down, Suse followed behind Gustav as he led her into the woods. He immediately embraced her, holding her body close. She shivered at the sudden warmth but relished being in his arms again. He tilted her face and covered her mouth with his; she kissed him back greedily, deeply.
A round of shots echoed in the still night, and Liesl closed her eyes, knowing what happened. They had caught the uncommon couple and punished them in the most extreme way: the Nazis had murdered a Jew girl and one of their own. The cold seeped into Liesl's bones as she heard the bodies fall into the crisp snow, and she envisioned the crimson staining the pure white; she retched onto the ground and heard footsteps. Sobs tore through her, unchecked, and the Nazi raised his pistol and took careful aim.
Suse felt the excruciating pain and stared into her soldier's eyes as she slipped to her knees. He followed only milliseconds later and tightened his grip on her as their lives drained out of them in a pool of blood around their corpses.
