Episode Parodies, Chapter 1: Hunter's Moon
By Jake Denton (kingcobra49036@yahoo.com)
Author's Note: This is a fan requested fic. It parodies, as you can tell, the "Hunter's Moon" trilogy.
Warning: Swearing, adult themes. Not entirely appropriate for Children.
994 A.D.
Some Farm in Scotland
SCRAPE!
Gillecomgain looked up. There was something in the barn, something unknown. Maybe it was a wild animal. Maybe not. Either way, it had no business in his father's barn. The youth settled the pail of water he was carrying on the ground, and snatched the pitchfork, holding the prongs facing the stalls of the horses. "Who's there?'
SCRAPE!
There was that noise again. Gillecomgain looked at the curtained stall behind him and moved toward it. There was definitely something hiding back there. Determined to find out what it was, Gillecomgain pulled the curtain back. For a few seconds, nothing happened, then--
The young boy got knocked onto his butt as the sexy line of Vegas showgirls danced their way out of the barn, legs kicking , smiles plastered on their faces. Gillecomgain watched them go, and smiled like the idiot that he was.
Suddenly, Demona lunged at him and spit in his face before flying off with the food in her hand. Gillecomgain wiped the spit off and started crying. "Ahh, me face! Ow! Ow! Ow! That smarts!" Demona snarled. "That'll teach you humans to go out by yourselves into a dark barn." Gillecomgain watched her fly off and his father rushed into the doorway. "I thought I told you to fetch some milk, boy. Then stand on your head and spin around." "Aye, father, but this demon jumped me. She shall pay. They shall all pay." He pulled on a hood that came out of nowhere. "and not with Visa or Mastercard either."
************
1995 A.D.
Manhattan, New Jersey... I mean, New York.
The woman trembled as she backed against the walls of the alley, the three hoodlums sneering at her. "You got some change lady? I'm trying to put myself through Medical school." The doctor that was walking by heard what the man said and muttered "Rubbish!" before going on his merry way. "What do you want?" the victim trembled. "A first date will do," One cronie smirked sarcastically. "Uh...I'll give you my sister's phone number!" The woman babbled. "She's a porker, but she has a great personality!"
"Perfect," the scum snickered. "I always wanted to screw a fat chick." The woman ran for dear life and the gang just let her go, focusing on Margot Yale and her husband approaching. Cornering the pair, the chrome brains replied tauntingly, "Folks, we're collectin' for a worthy cause. The "Put Gargoyles Back On TV" union." Margot glared at her husband, bossy and bitchy as always. "Great idea, Brendan. Walk down an abandoned New York street unarmed!"
"Don't start with me, Margot.'
"Why don't we go out at broad daylight and get mugged, Brendan?" The district attorney pushed in a haughty manner. "Margot..." her husband warned. "I have an idea! Let's find a gang sitting around take out our money and nice personals! You can give him your Rolex watch!" "That's it!" Brendan lost control and swung his fist, catching Margot in the jaw and knocking his bitchy wife unconscious. "I've put up with your whining for too fucking long, bitch." He walked away, and the gang watched him in astonishment before looking at Margot lying on the pavement.
"Cool! It's time for a little gang rape!"
They began tearing at her clothes.
************
Watching from above, Brooklyn and Lexington had been about to fly in and save the mugging victims when they saw the Yales and decided to fly home instead.
************
As they got back, the sun was just rising. "Take your places," Goliath ordered. "Where do we take it?" Lexington asked. "Don't be a wiseass," Goliath commanded. Lexington stuck his tongue out at him behind his back. B-B-B-B-B-B-R-R-R-R-RRUUUUPPPP!
Goliath spun quickly as Lexington buried his tongue back in his mouth and whistled innocently.
"This day is great," Broadway sighed. "Only one thing could make it perfect."
"Breakfast?" Brooklyn guessed. Broadway looked at him like he was crazy. "No... The Harem girls!" Broadway answered, pointing at the Vegas showgirls dancing through the clock tower's interior.
"Screw sleeping! " Brooklyn gasped in pure pleasure. "I'm grabbing some ass!"
Unfortunately, the sun rose just as Brooklyn's talons stretched toward a girl's breasts so he couldn't grab it. Typical rotten luck for him.
That night, when they were awakened, Goliath flew off to see Elisa and the others stayed behind. Landing on the policewoman's balcony, Goliath looked in and saw Elisa kissing some guy. She broke away. "I'm sorry. But I can't do this." The man, Jason Canmore, nodded. "Why? Is it because there's someone else?"
Elisa looked at him sharply. "No... it's because of..." Elisa's words were interrupted by the Vegas showgirls that came dancing from out of nowhere.
"Okay, this is just too much about these showgirls in this fic," Elisa replied before whipping her gun out and shooting them all down. Jason applauded. "Good job!" Goliath flew off rejected and unseen by either Canmore or Elisa.
************
Later that night, the Gargoyles hid as the Hunters, descended from Gillecomgain, blew up the Clock Tower, and flew into the hallowed shell. Goliath ripped the hood off the leader, revealing Jason. "Isn't this a pleasant surprise?" Brooklyn remarked.
"We're gonna kill you all!" Jason snarled. "No, you won't!" Goliath boomed as he tossed the hunter off the roof. Unfortunately, Elisa got in the way and fell herself.
Goliath saved her, however, and after the other two Canmores were arrested, Elisa looked at Goliath. "You know how I feel about your father's uncle's girlfriend's younger brother's cousin, right?"
Goliath looked confused.
"Uh... not really."
"Good," Elisa replied, kissing him.
Unfortunately, the sun came up while she was in his arms, and she was entrapped in his stone grip, unable to pull her lips away from Goliath's. Unable to speak, Elisa could only mumble.
"Ah, crap."
The End.
Any comments? Do you like this story? Hate it? Pee on it and flush it down the toilet? Do whatever you want. All replies, outside of the reviews at www.fanfiction.net, should go to the e-mail of the author. Kingcobra49036@yahoo.com
Coming Soon: A parody of "The Mirror".
By Jake Denton (kingcobra49036@yahoo.com)
Author's Note: This is a fan requested fic. It parodies, as you can tell, the "Hunter's Moon" trilogy.
Warning: Swearing, adult themes. Not entirely appropriate for Children.
994 A.D.
Some Farm in Scotland
SCRAPE!
Gillecomgain looked up. There was something in the barn, something unknown. Maybe it was a wild animal. Maybe not. Either way, it had no business in his father's barn. The youth settled the pail of water he was carrying on the ground, and snatched the pitchfork, holding the prongs facing the stalls of the horses. "Who's there?'
SCRAPE!
There was that noise again. Gillecomgain looked at the curtained stall behind him and moved toward it. There was definitely something hiding back there. Determined to find out what it was, Gillecomgain pulled the curtain back. For a few seconds, nothing happened, then--
The young boy got knocked onto his butt as the sexy line of Vegas showgirls danced their way out of the barn, legs kicking , smiles plastered on their faces. Gillecomgain watched them go, and smiled like the idiot that he was.
Suddenly, Demona lunged at him and spit in his face before flying off with the food in her hand. Gillecomgain wiped the spit off and started crying. "Ahh, me face! Ow! Ow! Ow! That smarts!" Demona snarled. "That'll teach you humans to go out by yourselves into a dark barn." Gillecomgain watched her fly off and his father rushed into the doorway. "I thought I told you to fetch some milk, boy. Then stand on your head and spin around." "Aye, father, but this demon jumped me. She shall pay. They shall all pay." He pulled on a hood that came out of nowhere. "and not with Visa or Mastercard either."
************
1995 A.D.
Manhattan, New Jersey... I mean, New York.
The woman trembled as she backed against the walls of the alley, the three hoodlums sneering at her. "You got some change lady? I'm trying to put myself through Medical school." The doctor that was walking by heard what the man said and muttered "Rubbish!" before going on his merry way. "What do you want?" the victim trembled. "A first date will do," One cronie smirked sarcastically. "Uh...I'll give you my sister's phone number!" The woman babbled. "She's a porker, but she has a great personality!"
"Perfect," the scum snickered. "I always wanted to screw a fat chick." The woman ran for dear life and the gang just let her go, focusing on Margot Yale and her husband approaching. Cornering the pair, the chrome brains replied tauntingly, "Folks, we're collectin' for a worthy cause. The "Put Gargoyles Back On TV" union." Margot glared at her husband, bossy and bitchy as always. "Great idea, Brendan. Walk down an abandoned New York street unarmed!"
"Don't start with me, Margot.'
"Why don't we go out at broad daylight and get mugged, Brendan?" The district attorney pushed in a haughty manner. "Margot..." her husband warned. "I have an idea! Let's find a gang sitting around take out our money and nice personals! You can give him your Rolex watch!" "That's it!" Brendan lost control and swung his fist, catching Margot in the jaw and knocking his bitchy wife unconscious. "I've put up with your whining for too fucking long, bitch." He walked away, and the gang watched him in astonishment before looking at Margot lying on the pavement.
"Cool! It's time for a little gang rape!"
They began tearing at her clothes.
************
Watching from above, Brooklyn and Lexington had been about to fly in and save the mugging victims when they saw the Yales and decided to fly home instead.
************
As they got back, the sun was just rising. "Take your places," Goliath ordered. "Where do we take it?" Lexington asked. "Don't be a wiseass," Goliath commanded. Lexington stuck his tongue out at him behind his back. B-B-B-B-B-B-R-R-R-R-RRUUUUPPPP!
Goliath spun quickly as Lexington buried his tongue back in his mouth and whistled innocently.
"This day is great," Broadway sighed. "Only one thing could make it perfect."
"Breakfast?" Brooklyn guessed. Broadway looked at him like he was crazy. "No... The Harem girls!" Broadway answered, pointing at the Vegas showgirls dancing through the clock tower's interior.
"Screw sleeping! " Brooklyn gasped in pure pleasure. "I'm grabbing some ass!"
Unfortunately, the sun rose just as Brooklyn's talons stretched toward a girl's breasts so he couldn't grab it. Typical rotten luck for him.
That night, when they were awakened, Goliath flew off to see Elisa and the others stayed behind. Landing on the policewoman's balcony, Goliath looked in and saw Elisa kissing some guy. She broke away. "I'm sorry. But I can't do this." The man, Jason Canmore, nodded. "Why? Is it because there's someone else?"
Elisa looked at him sharply. "No... it's because of..." Elisa's words were interrupted by the Vegas showgirls that came dancing from out of nowhere.
"Okay, this is just too much about these showgirls in this fic," Elisa replied before whipping her gun out and shooting them all down. Jason applauded. "Good job!" Goliath flew off rejected and unseen by either Canmore or Elisa.
************
Later that night, the Gargoyles hid as the Hunters, descended from Gillecomgain, blew up the Clock Tower, and flew into the hallowed shell. Goliath ripped the hood off the leader, revealing Jason. "Isn't this a pleasant surprise?" Brooklyn remarked.
"We're gonna kill you all!" Jason snarled. "No, you won't!" Goliath boomed as he tossed the hunter off the roof. Unfortunately, Elisa got in the way and fell herself.
Goliath saved her, however, and after the other two Canmores were arrested, Elisa looked at Goliath. "You know how I feel about your father's uncle's girlfriend's younger brother's cousin, right?"
Goliath looked confused.
"Uh... not really."
"Good," Elisa replied, kissing him.
Unfortunately, the sun came up while she was in his arms, and she was entrapped in his stone grip, unable to pull her lips away from Goliath's. Unable to speak, Elisa could only mumble.
"Ah, crap."
The End.
Any comments? Do you like this story? Hate it? Pee on it and flush it down the toilet? Do whatever you want. All replies, outside of the reviews at www.fanfiction.net, should go to the e-mail of the author. Kingcobra49036@yahoo.com
Coming Soon: A parody of "The Mirror".