AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, before you get all butt-hurt and call me out on it, this is not exactly how the episode goes. I repeat THIS IS NOT HOW THE EPISODE PLAYS OUT. If it was, I wouldn't need to write a fanfiction about it, now would I? ;P Enjoy!
...
"You're next! Who the hell are you?!" Instructor Shadis shouted at the almost bald boy in front of her. He had been yelling since this morning; going from trainee to trainee, scaring them shitless, then moving on. Sasha didn't exactly approve of the potential violence but she supposed that's how the Rite of Passage went.
"Connie Springer!" he shouted back, throwing himself into stance. Sasha noticed immediately that it was backwards. She knew that the Instructor would notice as well. "I'm from Ragako Village on the south side of Wall Trost!" The commander stared not at his face but at his left first locked on his right peck. He grabbed Connie by his head and lifted him clean off the ground. He kept his stance despite being suspended a foot or so in the air.
"You have it backwards, Connie Springer. It was the first thing you were taught. This salute expresses your resolve to give your heart to the people," he didn't exactly whisper it, but we all had to lean in to hear him. "Is your heart on your right side?!" Sasha felt as if she would cry. She had felt like that since this morning. She didn't enjoy him making fun of Armin's name, she didn't enjoy him telling Marco that he was useless, and she didn't enjoy him headbutting Jean hard enough to knock him down. But seeing this boy being held up by his head with no way to to defend his body or his dignity, that's what broke her.
She pulled the somewhat warm potato out of her inside jacket pocket. She had swiped in from the kitchen and was going to hide it until later but this seemed like a good diversion. Before Connie could answer, she took a loud, obvious bite of out the snack. Instructor Shadis's eyes drifted from Connie to Sasha. He dropped the boy in a uncoordinated heap at his face.
"Hey, you," he said, towering over her, "What do you think you're doing?" She took another rebellious bite. "I'm talking to you! Who the hell are you?!" She swallowed. Then slowly, with potato in hand, she got into stance.
"Sasha Braus from Dauper Village, on the southeast side of Wall Rose!"
"Sasha Braus," he said in his dangerously calm voice, "What is that you're holding in your right hand?"
"A steamed potato, sir! I found one in the cookhouse that was ready to eat, so I couldn't help myself." She was sweating now.
"You stole it?" he asked, "Why? Why did you decide to eat it now?"
"I felt it would be a waste to let it get cold, so I decided to eat it now." Her brown eyes stared into his yellow ones like it was the last thing she would ever do.
"No, I don't understand. Why? Why did you eat the potato?"
"Are you asking me why people eat potatoes, sir?" she asked. Half of the reason was because she was genuinely confused by what he was asking, the other half was to carry on her diversion while Connie recovered. Everyone, including Instructor Shadis, stared at her dumbfounded. She almost felt a little bad for catching him so off guard. She split the potato in half the best she could.
"Here's half of it for you," Sasha handed him the now cold vegetable.
"Half..."
...
"Whoa. He still has Potato Girl running?" Eren asked to group of trainees standing on the porch beside him.
"Man, she's been at it for five solid hours. She's really something." Connie said. He wasn't sure weather she had pulled a stunt like that because she was trying to distract from him or because she was just plain dumb, but he was grateful. He could have been the one running for hours if she hadn't stepped it. Connie couldn't believe he had gotten the salute wrong. He had to make it up to her.
...
"Hey, Christa. Would you mind doing me a favor?" Connie asked the small, blond girl sitting alone in the corner. Connie was too shy to repay Sasha directly but Christa seemed nice enough to do it for him.
"Sure, Connie! What do you need?" she answered. He knew she would be up to it. He handed her a loaf of bread.
"Would you mind taking this to Sasha? She's got to be hungry after all of that running," he looked down and scratched the back of his neck. "Oh, and this too!" Connie shoved a canteen of water into the girls small arms.
"Sasha? Oh, Potato Girl!" Christa giggled. Connie scowled.
"That's not her name."
"I'll take it to her!" Christa smiled, as if she hadn't just insulted what felt like Connie's only supporter in this whole stupid squad.
"Thanks," Connie cleared his throat and made his way back over to the group.
...
"Finally... done..." Sasha gasped between breaths. She collapsed onto the dirt behind the dinning hall, lying there peacefully until she smelled something warm and delightful. She lunged in the direction of the smell and caught in her mouth a soft cylinder of some sort of food.
"This is... bread!" Sasha shouted. She was overjoyed.
"It's not much, but I saved it for you," said a petite voice. Sasha turned to find Christa sitting on the ground behind her. "Oh, but you really ought to drink some water first!"
"Are you GOD?!" Sasha screeched, seizing the blond into a bear hug. Christa sputtered incoherent no's.
"Hey. What are you two doing?" Ymir, who had been hidden in the shadows until now, asked calmly. Sasha began devouring the roll as if the freckled freak were to take it.
"Umm, she's been running non-stop all this time, so Connie asked me if I would bring her some food and water. He said that he thought of getting her a potato, instead, but Sasha would probably think that he was making fun of her." Ymir looked down at the human garbage can who was now passed out in Christa's lap. Christa patted her head. "She must really care about Connie to do something so risky." Connie, who was watching through the window the whole time, smiled. He was glad that he was able to give back, even if it was just a loaf of bread.