Originally, this fic was written for Izumo's birthday, which was on the 11th of October (call this a belated character appreciation birthday thing), and was slightly altered after reading Chapter 61. Damn it, Tamamo, now I can't help but like you... Anyway, this fic was written to release those Izumo feelings. Another future-based fic for which there shall never be a multi-chapter series... *Sigh*
Disclaimer: Blu Rose does not own the Blue Exorcist series or any of its characters. She only owns this fic.
Summary: Some people aren't suited to be parents or don't want to be one. Izumo used to think of herself as one or the other, but now… (Future-based fic!)
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Once, Izumo thought her own mother wasn't fit to be a parent—not after the way things happened due in part to her actions. Some people simply weren't suited to be parents. Some didn't wish to be a parent at all. When she was older, Izumo thought she was one or the other, if only because she was never struck with the desire to be one, but now… She thinks that maybe it was because of her friends that she started to think about parenthood in a different light.
The first was Noriko. Motherhood suited her, and it suited the life she had chosen. A husband and now a baby girl for her to love and treasure—it sounded like the modern day happy ending. And even though Izumo was made the child's godmother—out of pity, she thinks, because in those days, she was still single and alone—she felt out of place among Noriko and her family. She wondered if she could ever look like that, but when she tried to think of it, Izumo just couldn't see herself.
The second was Shiemi. The blonde seemed to become enamored with the idea of babies and marriage—not particularly in that order—ever since she first laid eyes on Noriko's child and attended Rin's wedding. The thought of having a family of her own made the other tamer's heart swell. Shiemi could be a good wife and a good mother, Izumo thought. She was the sort of woman who cared deeply and loved openly, even when the person that care and love was directed towards didn't want it. But when the blonde woman said that she was the same, the purple-haired exorcist could only disagree. She wasn't as suitable a parent as Shiemi or Noriko. She doubted she could be anywhere near as good as her own late mother. Motherhood, she figured, was not for her.
Lastly was Rin. Okumura was always one to find a way past her defenses. His toddler son was the same way, Izumo realized, after she'd been pulled into looking after him while his father was on a mission across town. It started off awfully: the child started to wail and flail his chubby little fists the moment Rin left. The purple-haired woman thought the entire experience would be miserable. But eventually, he calmed down. He soon started begging for Izumo's attention with his baby babble, longing to be held. She found herself holding the baby long after he had fallen asleep, enjoying the contact and the way he nuzzled into her. Although she didn't express it, Izumo hated handing him back to his father and actually felt envious of the attention the half-demon received from his son then.
Now here she was, resting in bed as she cradled her newborn child in her arms and wondering how she got to this point. Maybe it was the sight of her friends that planted the seed in her head, a prideful desire to prove that she could be as good a parent as her mother, if not better, or simply her realizing her own desires. Either way, she didn't really care. The doubts and the nagging emptiness were gone. Simply holding her newborn child in her arms made her heart feel light. She couldn't resist laying a kiss upon the baby's head and then whispering, "I'll do my very best. Nothing will ever harm you, my most precious treasure."
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I GOT SOMETHING WRONG, I'M SURE!
…Anyway, I derped on writing this story several times and dropped several things: like the name of the story, and the name of Noriko's child…as well as Noriko herself. Seriously, I called her Paku throughout most of the first draft before I changed my mind and looked up her name. (How many people even refer to her by her given name, I wonder, in the fandom and the series itself?) Then I dropped a bunch of dialogue—actually, all of it. Then there's the fact that this used to be a Reader x Izumo story because I've become a bit enamored with "Reader x" even though all I can imagine is something like a visual novel where the player character is never seen. I feel like I could do better, but these days, this is the best I could do. (College and all its freaking papers and group assignments squeeze the life out of me.)
Normally I'd remind you to review or whatever, but I don't even care if this gets reviews or likes—I just wanted to get my Izumo feels out in a positive way.
