Conquering and Surviving
Disclaimer: I own nothing, all characters belong to Stephanie Myers and other owners. I just play with'em and make'em miserable.
Summery: Edward is conquering all those fears and the hell he went through at 17, eight years ago. Bella is surviving the horror and pain she went through and is trying to thrive eight years later. They've tried to conquer and survive with people who don't understand, then they meet. AH, AU, EPOV/BPOV.
Not going into the details of what happened to them, I want you to find out as they relive them.
Author's note: So this is my first Twilight fic, it's an idea that came to me a while ago and sat down to crank it out. It will focus on Edward and Bella. Other characters will pop in and out but this is a story about them overcoming their past and healing. Angst and other terrible things will be plentiful, so if that isn't your cup of tea, feel free to pass the story up.
My Bella and others are a bit different, so you can check out the pictures for this story here: (( ))((/innerstrength88))((.tumblr.))com (just remove the brackets)
I do not have a beta, so all mistakes are my own, hopefully I can find one soon. This is a longish drabble and I am going to try to upload once a day, since I seem to be cranking out one to three a day. This plot bunny won't let me rest.
I love reviews, negative or otherwise. I learn something from each one of them. Just don't be mean, it's wrong.
Anyways, hope you enjoy the ride.
Chapter One
EPOV
2012
Push, shove, and breathe.
Push, shove, and breathe.
So many people were doing the same as was as they tried to make their way down the steps to the platform.
All of them had somewhere to go and all of them wanted to get there before the rest; all of which caused the mess I was now in.
A mess no one thought I'd be able to handle but I was; I was handling it.
Take that Dr. Platt.
Take that over protective brother.
And take that Aro.
I was doing this.
Push, shove, breathe.
2004
The mumbling behind me was nothing to me, you live in Chicago enough, you get used to it.
People behind you, mumbling.
Dread filled my stomach though for some reason.
It was panic and it wasn't something I was used to feeling, at least not since I was a little boy.
At 17, I was a man now, one who stood well over six feet and had a swimmers strength, I had nothing to worry about.
I could take care of myself.
The voices though were coming from more than just two. Maybe four? Five?
Shaking my head, I fingered my cell one and picked up my brisk pace.
Their footsteps did the same.
Taking a deep breath, I had been about to turn my brisk jog into a full-out run but a hand grabbed my arm.
"No so fast Masen!" The voice said and before I could even raise my free right hand, a clothe came over my nose and mouth.
The smell flooded me and though I tried to fight and struggle, more arms held me and the toxin dampened rag brought darkness closer.
For a moment I looked into the inky blackness and could see the peacefulness.
The escape.
And I fell into it.
2012
Push, shove, and breathe.
For years I let it control me.
For years I found another inky blackness to fall into it.
Eight years later though, I was conquering.
Final push, shove, and breathe.
I was on the train and heading to my future.
Finally I was reaching a destiny I thought I had lost at 17.
But I was conquering.
Hold, grip, and balance.
Mantras and want was all I had now and it would drive me to the end.
Hold, grip, and balance.
Columbia.
The promise land.
Hold, grip, and balance.
BPOV
2012
"With all do respect Mrs. Swan..."
I was already toning them out. For the past year, I've sat in this room while they fought against my idea.
Dr. Cullen was in agreement with my mother.
I couldn't 'handle' it.
Leaving home was "to dangerous" and my mom wouldn't be able to survive if I got hurt again.
But she never had to survive. I had to survive. I survived.
And now I wanted to live again.
Reclaim the life that had been taken from me at 15.
Reclaim those promising chances I had all those years ago.
Before James.
Before I lost Jake.
Before I lost Isabella.
"Dr. Cullen you can't be serious..."
I came back, looking at the wall in my normal muted state. Seeing the fancy degrees there.
One's Dr. Cullen had used to save me and now the ones that gave him the power to control my fate.
Tuning back out, I thought about music. What I did to deal now, ran lyrics through my head.
How I had survived James.
How I had survived losing Jake.
How I'd survive now.
'You know the lies they always told you...and the love you never knew...'
They were my escape.
2004
"Jake are you sure about this?" I asked as he pulled me towards the beat up car.
James was the new guy in school, a senior to our freshman.
He creped me out but Jake idolized him.
Plus I figured I had no reason to fear him.
I doubted he'd mess with the mayor's son and the police chief's daughter.
I was safe.
I had no reason to fear.
Ever.
Not to mention Jake at 15 was already filled out like a man and stood at nearly six foot five.
Fear was not an emotion I had ever needed.
But as Jake drug me to the car after school, suddenly my gut was clenched with it.
Jake meant the world to me, so I agreed.
I climbed into the backseat as James and Mike got into the front.
Mike the other new boy kinda freaked me out as well.
They came to Forks together, they were cousins whom both lived with Jame's mom, Patty.
Mike had asked me out already, him being a sophomore, it wouldn't be so out of the norm.
Luckily Jake had already dubbed me his wife back in middle school, so I had an excuse to say no.
And I think Mike was a little intimidated by Jake's size since he barely passed me on the height scale.
"It'll be fun Isabella, promise." Jake said.
"Yeah Izzy, don't worry." James said as he looked back.
I only swallowed and willed away the fear.
I was safe. I had Jake.
2012
The memory found its way back in and I took a deep breath. Letting the lyrics override it.
Only breaking the mute pose when I heard Dr. Cullen voice raising.
He never raised his voice.
"Keeping her here where the trauma happen WILL not help her!"
"Keeping her will keep her SAFE! I know you've been her for doctor seven years but I am her mother!"
He took a deep breath as I watched them like a tennis match. Not believing he was willing to let me go.
That he thought it was best for me.
"Renée, I know it's hard but New York City is a safe city and she needs to move on. You and Charlie need to move on."
I swallowed the tears that rose up. I hadn't cried since the first night James had me.
Since then I'd been a mute with my emotions. Just existing.
Just surviving.
Now, I felt them bubble to the surface.
I had another chance.
I was getting a chance to live again.
This time the lyrics weren't sad.
'I'm gonna go back...to the girl I was...on the night you found me...'