Response to a Cheeky Monkey Challenge: write a 400 - 500 word story which features two random characters in a random location and answers a random question, in-character or overall.

Characters, location, question, and the Cheeky Monkeys responsible, can be found at the end of the story. Special thanks to Epiphany sola Gatia for the title!

The Architect strode through the Deep Roads, searching for the Grey Warden he could sense nearby. He was furious that he couldn't make the Warden Commander see the logic of his plan to free the darkspawn from the incessant pull of the Old Gods' call and bring peace between the people of Thedas and the darkspawn. All he needed was some Grey Warden blood! Was that too much to ask?

Now he had a second chance, however. He had felt the presence of a Grey Warden and was seeking him out. Maybe he would be more amenable to reason. He heard the sound of chatter and saw the firelight well before he turned the corner and found them.

"Oh yes, there are all kinds of cheese-" Alistair managed to slip in.

"Really? That's fascinating!" Dagna cut him off yet again. "We only have one kind of cheese here, and that's nug cheese. Have you ever had nug cheese? It's really stinky and doesn't taste good at all!"

"Ahem. Excuse-" the Architect said.

"I mean, some people love nug cheese, I guess, but it is almost impossible to cut," Dagna babbled on. "Why I've even dulled one of my father's knives trying to cut it, and my father is an amazing blacksmith!"

"If I could just-" tried the Architect.

"And let me tell you, he was awfully mad at me! But really, who's fault is it? I'd say the people who make the cheese! I mean, why can't they make nug cheese a little softer?" Dagna continued obliviously.

"Really? And how does one-" Alistair tried again.

"Now, I know what you are going to say Alistair. 'How does one cut the cheese?', and that's a very good question too."

"I just need a moment of-"

"Well, the secret to cutting nug cheese is absolutely fascinating, let me tell you! It turns out, all you need to do is soak the cheese for about three days in nug milk, then pound on it for about thirty minutes or so with a mallet to soften it up! I actually learned that at the Shaperate. There are so many fascinating things you can learn there! Did you know there are about two hundred ways to cook a nug? It's true!" Dagna prattled on.

Alistair looked at the Architect in desperation, but he had already decided to throw in the towel. Maybe the hive mind wasn't that bad after all. It was definitely quieter.

Dagna (Enaid Aderyn)

The Architect (Perahn)

The Deep Roads (Alexmancer)

"How does one cut the cheese?" (Epiphany sola Gatia)