Natasha stared at the screen the doctor was pointing at. There were a lot of blobs and blurs but Natasha had a hard time believing that one of them indicated her baby.
The doctor highlighted it, though, so it had to be true, and that's when it really hit her. She's pregnant.
She's pregnant, with Steve's baby and they hadn't talked about this.
Sure, they had mentioned it, shortly after they got married, but the consensus had been that they would wait with that, Steve had said he wasn't ready, and the Avengers still needed them and Natasha had been fine with that. It wasn't like she was dying to be a mom.
The doctor kept talking, mentioning monitoring and stepping down from active duty, but it was all a blur to Natasha.
When she arrived back at the tower she immediately went into the workshop, pacing and wringing her hands, because this couldn't be happening.
They had agreed to wait. This was way too early. They weren't ready for this.
It would mean she had to step down. She couldn't fight like this. And Steve. He was going to be so mad, because of course he would step down as well, that's just how he was, but he would probably resent her for making him do it so early, and Natasha couldn't tell him.
She actually laughed at that, because it wasn't like she could hide it from him, but then she sunk down on the couch and buried her face in her hands.
Steve was going to be so mad.
She put her hands over her stomach, a protective gesture, because while she was scared shitless that this would end her marriage, she was also absolutely sure that she wanted this kid. And she definitely had to tell Steve.
With that thought in mind she stood up and went looking for him.
She found him in the kitchen, preparing food for them, and she used the time it took him to notice her to watch him. It was such a domestic picture, Steve in sweats with an apron so he wouldn't get sauce on them around his hips, and Natasha could easily picture a baby in the middle of all this.
But that didn't change the fact that she was so afraid to tell Steve about it and she actually tried to leave again when he finally noticed her and turned around, big smile on his face.
"Hey, Nat. Food's nearly done. You hungry?" he asked her and she swallowed. It was now or never.
"I have to tell you something," she said and he instantly became serious.
"What's wrong?" he asked, concern clear on his face and Natasha briefly closed her eyes.
"You have to promise you won't be mad," she mumbled and Steve moved the pots away from the stove, so he could come over to her.
"Sweetheart, what is going on?"
"You cannot be mad, okay? I know this changes a lot, but you cannot be mad, I can't do this if you're mad at me."
"I would like to promise that, but it would be a lot easier if you could tell me why you think I would be mad in the first place. Did you do something?"
"No, it's not...I...we...," Natasha was aware that she was panicking but she couldn't stop. Her breaths were short and way too fast and her hands were trembling.
Steve gently steered her towards the couch and sat her down, never leaving her side.
"Whatever it is, I'm sure we can figure it out," he gently told her and Natasha took one deep breath before she blurted "I'm pregnant."
Steve stared at her with wide eyes and she couldn't read his face, she couldn't, shouldn't she be able to read his reaction? But Steve's face was closed off and Natasha saw all her fears confirmed right in front of her.
"You don't want it," Steve said and it wasn't even a question. Natasha stared at him confused and Steve nodded. "We didn't talk about this properly, and I know you never really wanted to be a mother and your reaction is speaking for itself, really."
She could tell that he was trying to appear calm but there was the slightest quiver to his voice and she covered his hands with hers.
"I thought you were going to be mad," Natasha told him and Steve looked torn between shocked and hurt.
"That you would want an abortion? It's your body. I don't have a say in this, not really."
Natasha shook her head at that. "I'm not getting an abortion. I thought you'd be mad, because we didn't talk about this and it means I'm stepping down and I know you'd feel like you have to as well, but you love your job and I won't make you and,"
She didn't get to finish her sentence because Steve had pulled her in for a crushing kiss.
"I am not mad," he panted against her lips when they separated again. "How could I ever be mad because of this?"
"I want this baby, Steve," she said and kept her gaze trained on Steve. "I want us to have this baby."
It was then that it really hit Steve because his eyes went wide and he mumbled "You're pregnant," with so much wonder in his voice that Natasha wondered how she could have ever doubted him.
"I'm pregnant," she repeated and Steve's smile was so big she wondered how it still fitted on his face.
"We're going to be parents. I'm going to be a dad!"
"Yes, you are," Natasha laughed and Steve crushed her into a hug.
"We need to tell everyone," he said when he released her and somehow it was that sentence that finally settled all her fears. Steve wanted this as much as she did. They were going to be parents and they would love every second of it.