|"White walls surround us
No light will touch your face again
Rain taps the windows
As we sleep among the dead"|

(Inspired by a true story, a piece of my past mixed with a dream I've had of the person mentioned. I wil explain further, as you can tell from the date its still a sore subject for me. Enjoy. March 10, 2011- The day Luke died)

Have you ever been in love? Its an amazingly horrible feeling isn't it? Hello, my name is Jen and I'm about to tell you my love story- My first love, you could say. And he was- my first everything (kept it PG-13 pretty much our whole relationship ha) Lucas Hake, he was everything to me and nothing at the same time. We met through my girlfriend at the time, Maxie (make fun of her name, hurt you) and he was a cousin of hers. We didn't get along at first, as he was only around trying to convince Maxie to come to Italy back...home, you could say. No, I wouldn't call that plac for her, not with her dumb ass o r.

Ugh, how I hated him. Luke, as he preferred to be called, at first was the cockiest asshole I'd met in a long time and I s wanted to kick his ass. He always would smirk at me, giving me butterflies and making me even madder at him. I mean, I was dating hi n, whom he was also very mean to and often would 'spar' with her and hurt her: Again, I wanted to kick his ass. I told him as such.

"You? Kick my ass? Little girl, don't kid yourself. I won't hold back on you." He said to me when I told him I wanted to spar with him.

"Little?! Are you- Okay, Maxie, do me a favor," she looked at me like I grew a second head, which amused me but I wasn't going to show her that, "go. Let me and Lukey here have a littl t." Her only reply was a hesitant nod, but I knew better: She'd go, but watch from the trees behind her house. Two hours- T w o hours was all it took, for me to fall. He had what qualities I wanted...but I wouldn't admit it to myself. I wouldn't do that to Maxie. But I know who would help me if I gave Luke the chance.

He wasn't so bad now, as the days became weeks. He stayed with Maxie, "to protect Maxie" he would tell me- I knew better. I started the change in him. Sure, he was still sometimes a cocky little shit, but his cold heart defrosted over time.

It was an epic love- Until January 2009. We got into a big fight, over him thinking I cheated-and we broke up. A year, two months- Our tale lasted that long. We eventually moved on, he had this one girl I'd never really thought to get to know, the one he died with: Although her name escapes me, I wil remember my strong gut instinct when he told me he was taking her on a cruise: "Don't go," I said to him as I reached for his hand, turning him to look at me as my hazel orbs looked into his deep forest green. His eyes were my favorite part of him.

"Jen, I'll be back in a week. I promise, love." L o v e, he always called me that. Not babe, baby- Love. I was the girl who forever changed him, his first love. And he left. He.. He didn't let me say goodbye. About a week after he was supposed to come back, Maxie texts me.

'Hey babe. I-I have to t-tell you something.' She said. Okay, I replied. That's when she sent me the two worst words I'd heard in my entire dating life: 'Luke died.' I stopped replying. I broke, cried out and screamed. My first love, m for believing in love- Gone. Just like that. should have stopped him. I told Maxie I would talk to her later, that I was going to bed. That night, I dreamed of him. Or rather, he visited me.

-Dream starts now-
I was in a white gown, soft and almost like a wedding gown. I was confused, Luke had someone else, right? A deep, masculine and familiar chuckle reached my ears.

"Hey, beautiful." He was standing under a tree filled with apple blossoms, wearing a suit and tie. I gasped and immediately ran to him, jumping in his arms as tears flowed down my cheeks.

"Why?!" I screamed at him, well sobbed explains it more, "why did you not listen! Yo us, Luke! Maxie, me, your other family- Why?" He gently placed his hands on my cheeks, wiping away my tears as he kissed me on the forehead.

"I'm sorry, love. I didn't want to, I knew it wasn't my time just yet." Was all he said. It was a lie, I knew it in my heart. He just kept murmuring to me softly in Italian- I loved it when he spoke Italian to me. The first time he said I love you was in Italian: 'Te amo cosi tanto' which is 'I love you so much'.

"But I'm here now, love. I'm right by your side. Never forget that." After wiping my tears for the last time, he lifted my face and shared a chaste kiss with me before smiling softly. I knew that smile..

"You have to go?" I whispered softly, watching with tears welling up in my eyes once more as he nodded.

"I do, but I have one favor to ask of you."

"Anything, Luke," I replied instantly, how could I deny him one last wish?

"B y. Live, for me." He spoke in a whisper, his being beginning to fade. Gasping, I quickly tried to grab his hand as he smiled one last time.

"I'll see you soon, love. I'm always with you, I promise." His last words made me fall to my knees, but a sad smile graced my lips.

"See you soon, Lucas Hake."