2 months since I last saw my brother. Only a month since Justin left for college. Yet it felt like an eternity. I was surprised at how much I missed him. It was like when I lost Mason yet worse somehow? I feel lost without him like a part of me is missing. Everyone expects me to be over the moon now that Justin's moved out gone to college. I'm the eldest in the house, no older brother to tell me what to do. I should be happy. Going out when I want, skipping class now that I don't have to worry about Justin being here to tell on me. Yet I find myself hurled up in my bedroom in the afternoons when I'm not working. I've even taken to studying for school. I just got a B- on my science exam because I actually studied for once. When I got it all I wanted to do was find Justin and tell him. Till I realized he was away at college and I couldn't just go find him.

Justin's called mum every Sunday so far and he's talked to dad, Max an even Harper. I don't want him to know that I miss him. I don't know if I will be able to hold myself together if I was to talk to him. If I could stop myself from breaking down and begging him to come home to me.

2 months 1 week and 2 days.
Since I last saw or talked to Justin. I can't believe I'm actually counting. I can't sleep without dreaming about him and it's driving me crazy. Every time I look at my phone I have an urge to call him. But by the time I work up the courage it's usually 2 am. So I doubt he will answer and I don't won't to wake him. I don't want him to know I need him.

2 months 1 week 3 days.
Since he left to live his dream of going to college. On the plus side him being gone means I've had to spend more time working at the substation I'm so busy my mind doesn't have the chance to wander. I feel like now that Justin's gone I have to be the responsible one. I've even stopped using magic for everything. I'm sure people have noticed the change but no one has commented on it yet. At least not to my face anyway.

I've taken to sneaking into Justin's room after mum and dad have gone to bed. Bringing my sketch book laying on my stomach on his bed and just drawing. It was one of those nights 3 months after Justin had left for college. I was laying on Justin's bed in a pair of my boxers and one of Justin's t-shirts. Drawing the camp fire scene from our vacation were I nearly lost all of my family because of a stupid wish. I must of drifted off at some point because next thing I know I was being startled awake by someone landing on me.

"Oomph."
"What the? Alex?" Why is he the one acting incredulous at least I'm meant to be in the house?
"Justin what are you doing here?"
"What am I doing here, what am I doing here. Alex it's my room. A better question would be what are you doing in here asleep in my bed at three 'o' clock in the morning, wearing one of my t-shirts?"

At this point we were both siting up leaning against the wall. I closed my eyes before answering what was I going to say. That I missed him, that my life had no meaning without out him. That I was wearing his shirt because it smelt like him. I felt the tears rolling down my face before I realized I was crying. Before I knew it all the tears I've been holding in the past few months started pouring out I couldn't stop them.

Justin must of felt my body shaking because he reached his arm around me and squeezed behind me an pulled the both of us down onto his bed. Till we were laying on his bed with him cradling me. He leant up placed a kiss on my check and told me he missed me to and to go to sleep and that he'd be right here in the morning and that we'd talk then.

I was woken up from the most amazing dream when I heard someone groaning behind me and an arm tighten around my waist. Then it all came rushing back to me it was Justin behind me. It wasn't a dream he is actually here. He must have realized I was awake because he kissed me on the cheek and started stroking my hair.
"Morning Lex."
I rolled over to face him "morning Justin."
He was still stroking my hair I turned my head and realized it was only 6 and not even mum would be up for another 30 minutes and I wouldn't have to be down stairs for breakfast till 7 but instead of getting up and going to my own room and going back to bed I decided to be honest.

" I got a b- on my science test."
" I knew you had it in you Lex I'm proud of you." That sentence nearly made me start crying again and everything I'd be feeling the past three months came rushing out.
"I've missed you Justin I didn't think I would but the last three months have been horrible. I've been studying because I had nothing else to do. "
I held my breath after my confession waiting to see if he was going to laugh at me.
" I've missed you to Alex. It hurt that whenever I called you never wanted to speak to me. I couldn't understand why I wasn't over the moon that I didn't have to worry about you pranking me. That I could do my homework without you barging in trying to distract me. But I found I was getting distracted anyway. So when we were given a week off for thanksgiving I jumped at the chance to come home. "
"At 3 in the morning?" I couldn't help the sarcasm in my voice.
" Ha ha, I was finishing all my homework so wouldn't have to bring any work with me."
"Still a dork I see." finally delving into familiar territory I couldn't stop the smile from creeping onto my face.

" It's being a dork that got me the grades to be able to transfer to NYU after the winter break and making it so I can come back home."
Moving back home. Going to NYU.

Moving back home. Going to NYU.
Moving back home. Going to NYU.
just a loop in my head I don't know how long I laid there trying to process it.
"Home, you're coming home."
"I'll be busy with college, but I'll be living here and just traveling to and from everyday."
All of a sudden we could hear mum yelling up the stairs that breakfast was ready.
"guess you should go downstairs and surprise everyone. While I go chuck one of my own t-shirts on. "
"What you don't want them to no you missed me."
"Go away dork go get hugged to death by mum." The banter was familiar comforting.
"You look adorable in my shirt by the way."
I just rolled my eyes and walked down the hall to my room once my door was closed I just slid down the door wrapped my arms around my legs and rested my head on my knees. I was so overwhelmed last night I was missing Justin this morning he was home for a week and transferring to NYU after winter break I was snapped out of my musings by mum squealing guess she knows Justin's home.

I get up and slip Justin shirt off my head and slip an old one of mine on and head down stairs.
"What are you doing here dork shouldn't be at college with the other dorks."
"It's called holidays Alex. I thought I'd come home and visit the family for thanksgiving."
"Alex be nice to your brother you haven't seen him in three months the least you could do is be nice for at least breakfast." lectured mum.
"Yes mum. Please pass the pancakes Justin. "Happy mum I even put a smile on my face for you.
"Of course Alex here you go."
"Thank you Justin." I was trying so hard not to laugh I was doing a really good job until I locked eyes with Justin. I think we freaked everyone out when we burst into laughter.

After we regained control and stopped laughing the rest of breakfast and morning was spent with everyone talking to Justin like they hadn't been talking to him every week. At one point I got up to go have my shower. Half an hour later clean an dressed I walked back downstairs to see everyone in the same positions as before.
"The dorks going to be here all week, don't we have a sub shop to open."
"Of course Max, Harper you guys are on for the lunch shift. Alex be back by 4:30 to get ready for the dinner shift."
"What about me dad."
Does the dork not no how to slack off at all.
"You just got back Justin you don't have to help out today."
Back a couple of hours an already the favourite.
"I don't mind dad I'll help Alex with the dinner shift."
I can't believe it he makes the rest of us look bad I need to get away from this before I throw up. I stalked back up the stairs and threw myself on my bed. This is way too much effort.

"Alex, can I come in."
I rolled over to look at him hugging my pillow to my chest. I'm going to regret this.
"Sure."
I sat up still hugging the pillow curled up like I was earlier. I followed him with my eyes as he walked in kicking clothes out of his way. Until he finally made his way to the end of my bed and sat down. I don't know how long we both just sat there staring at each other.

Waiting for the other one to speak first. Eventually I couldn't stand the silence so I just said the first thing that popped into my head "Shoes."
"What?"
Good question umm shoes, shoes the sale at the mall" Theirs a sale at the mall and I need a new pair of shoes. I was going to go today while everyone was working."
Well I wasn't but I could always do with a new pair of shoes. Plus shopping always clears my head.
"Let me tag along and I'll buy us lunch."
Damn it if he buys lunch then I have more money for shoes and clothes but I also have to spend time with him. What the hell I've spent the last three months missing him
I may as well let him come. How bad can it be?
" All right you ready to go now?"
"Yeah just let me grab my wallet."

We walked to the mall in complete silence both of us lost in our own thoughts. This time I was not going to break the silence. I dragged Justin into the first shop and started trying on shoes and a couple of tops and skirts. After a couple of hours, several stores and countless bags on my arms. Justin and I still had only uttered a couple of words. I had all but forgotten about him. That is till he grabbed my up and dragged me into the dinner we were passing.

"Justin wha..."
"I'm hungry and we need to talk so were going to go sit over there in the corner. Wait for someone to come take our order an then talk."
Since when is Justin bossy? At least the dinner was pretty empty so we could talk in relative privacy. I picked up the menu and started browsing it. Well I watched Justin browse his menu but who's asking. It wasn't too long till out waitress arrived to take our orders leaving with them and the menus. Time to face the music I suppose. But if Justin thinks this going to be easy and I'm going to help he should think again.

"Alex I really did miss you while I was gone. Like I said after I turned Professor Crumbs into a hamster you make me a better a wizard, but you also make me a better person you give my life a meaning above schoolwork. You make sure I have a life by making mistakes that I have to fix. Not so I can prove I'm better but because your you Alex. Because I like making you happy again. Your not as bad as I make you out to be. Yes you're lazy and I hate that you prank me. But your smart and an amazing Artist. When I go back to school at the end of the week I want to keep in contact Alex even if it's just texting. I want it to be like when we little or how it was in that scene you were drawing last night without our lives being in danger. "

Damn it he saw that I can't believe I left it on his bed. I couldn't even stop the tears from falling if I wanted to he may be king of the nerds and that speech may have been lame but I guess why it's just us here I can be honest." I really did miss you too Justin. It was driving me crazy I didn't understand why I was missing the king of the dorks. I didn't talk to you when you called because I was confused after 2 months I was finally able to admit I missed you, that my life was missing something. I stopped using magic for everything because it just seemed wrong to use magic with you not around like I was betraying you. I tried to work up the nerve to call you several times. But whenever I did it was 2 am and I didn't want to bother you. After failing at that I started sneezing into your room at night to draw, when I got upset id through on one of your t-shirts so I could feel like you were there comforting me. It's always been you and I against the world Justin but suddenly it was me against the world by myself."

"I'm sorry Alex I didn't want you to feel like that I just wanted to prove that I could get into college and support myself."
He sounded so heartfelt with his apology that I knew he wasn't trying to trick me. He was really sorry for leaving me.
"Why didn't you tell everyone about transferring to NYU in the New Year?"

"I was going to tell them on Christmas morning. That's when I was going to tell everyone. "
I was confused why wait. What's the point in waiting if it's definitely happening? I asked Justin just that
" I know I said I was moving back home Lex but I was kind of looking for my own place. And I wanted to get everything finalized before I told mum and dad so I could show them it could work."
"Oh"
"Yeah it's really cool I can get an apartment in one of the buildings owned by this foundation who only rents college kids out apartments. There is terms you have to the keep your grades up and are able to make the payment. The apartments are tiny studio apartments, but the rents cheap and the buildings half way between the sub shop and the campus."
"So you don't definitely have an apartment yet." I didn't know if I wanted him to answer yes or no.
"No I do I just don't know which one yet there are a couple of tenants moving out after the semester is over. And the paper work won't be finalised until the start of winter break."

"Oh?" is that all I can say, oh what's wrong with me.
"Promise you won't tell mum and dad?"
" Of course. I'll leave breaking the news to you I don't want to deal with mums tears. "
"Thanks, we better leave if we want to be on time for the dinner shift. Do you want me to carry some of your bags?"
"Let's go then and if you don't mind."
Maybe I've matured and that's why I'm not insulting him, how we are managing to act civil towards each other. It was weird, But nice.

The rest of the week was spent in much the same fashion. With me and Justin spending time together when everyone else was working and me still sneaking into his room every night sometimes drawing sometimes talking. It wasn't long before he had to leave to go back. But this time I knew it wasn't long until he'd be home and we would be staying in contact. I even gave him a hug when he left this time. It only lasted a few seconds, but it was a way of solidifying that it's still me and him against the world.