I'm so sorry...

"Jason! Jason, no! Don't do this!" Percy pleaded, reaching out to his friend. It was storming heavily, electricity flashing across the sky dangerously, outlining Jason's figure perfectly as the son of Jupiter. The boy himself was hovering just out of reach of his frantic friend, an apologetic, sad smile on his face. He wiped blood out of his eyes and touched his matted, blonde hair- or what was left of it. Lightning did not affect him but fire did.

Percy was leaning as far as he could off of the balcony, his left arm mangled and most likely with some irreparable damage, but that was last thing on his mind. His right arm, covered in burns as well, was stretched towards the floating demigod. Thunder echoed through the air. "Jason!" He begged, nearly sobbing. The tears mixed with the rain cascading from the sky.

"I'm sorry, Percy." Jason's voice was soft, but Percy heard every word clear as day. Jason's left eye stared into Percy's eyes, his right covered by an eyepatch that was falling loose and showing the ugly gash. "You know it has to be me."

"It doesn't have to be either of us! We can think a way out of this, we always have!" Percy tried to catch even the foot of the demigod but Jason was too far away. "We always have!"

"Percy." Jason shook his head, eye closed. "There's nobody left to fight. But they're all still alive; I want to keep it that way. And you know, out of the two of us, they like you more." There was pain in his voice but also complete acceptance. Defeated acceptance.

"Jason-"

"Don't try, Percy. I can try to be everything everyone expects but I will never be good enough. Always second best. That's okay, I'm fine. But that doesn't mean I'm going to stand back and watch this happen." Jason stared off to his left, the sky flashing and reflecting the storm in his eye.

"But this doesn't mean you have to die, Jason! There's always another way! Greek policy, always hope!" Percy was grasping at straws at this point. He couldn't feel his fingertips and his hair was dripping in his face. Or was that rain? Tears? Blood? Sweat?

A laugh of the defeated escaped Jason's figure and an ache burned in Percy. He had never seen his friend so crushed and finished.

"That's the thing, Percy, that you just don't seem to understand. I'm not Greek. And that's the problem, isn't it? That I'm willing to sacrifice for the greater good? That I don't run after every friend? That I know that we aren't going to walk out in tact from every situation?" Tears fell freely from the son of Jupiter's face. Bloody tears from his right eye and clear from his left. "I'm Roman, Percy. And Romans know how to sacrifice."

Percy's heart stopped. He was frozen, gazing up at his broken friend. Nothing else mattered.

Jason was stoic; he was unmoving, seemingly unfeeling at times. Almost harsh. Wolf-like.

Roman.

"Don't…" Percy tried weakly. Jason's face broke, pain showing through. He rushed forward and wrapped Percy in a hug, the black-haired demigod frozen in place. Before Percy had the chance to wrap his arms around his friend Jason was already leaving. "No!" Percy's voice broke and he scrambled after Jason who was just out of his reach, again. "Please!"

"Take care of them for me," Jason whispered, his parting words. Then he flew backwards and trained his eye on the contraption that had started this whole mess. His gaze hardened into unfaltering determination, his body taking a spartan-like stance. There was one shot at this.

Percy watched as Jason let loose a guttural cry and shoot towards the contraption, disappearing into it in a display of blazing lighting and flashing metal from his sword.

"Jason! JASON!" Percy screamed at the top of his lungs as the sky shuddered, the earth following soon after. The contraption exploded in a brilliant show of flame and electricity, a small, sparking figure falling from the wreckage. "NO!" Percy shrieked, turning on his heel and sprinting down the stairs of the building he was in. Upon reaching the shaking ground-no doubt his doing-he sprinted to where he saw the figure drop, metal and materials falling around him. A pipe crashed into his shoulder, but he shook it off, eyes only for a shock of blonde among the dull iron.

He found what he was looking for, but there was no blonde to catch sight of. Jason's body was covered in black soot, red mixing with the black and almost overcoming it. A strangled sound escaped Percy's throat and he hoped against hope that Jason was somehow still alive.

The son of the sea god scrambled to find his pulse, his breath, the stuttering beat of a heart. Silence and cold skin met his efforts. Percy sobbed, falling over his fallen friend in despair. Percy's salty tears mixed with the soot and blood on the roman's torso.

The thunder grew louder and the rain heavier, and the sky wept for its lost child.

-x-

They thought that Percy would try to keep their spirits up somehow, like he always did in times of trouble. They thought, well, at least it's not like when Percy and Annabeth fell into Tartarus, when there was no glue.

Percy was done being the glue. He didn't want to be needed. Jason's words echoed in his brain endlessly: "Always second best."

Second best? Percy scoffed at the thought. Jason deserved to be equal to him, more than equal. He sacrificed his life for them. There was no doubt in Jason's mind when he knew he was flying to his death, but he did it anyway. One of his reasons being that everyone would be able to manage without him, but not without Percy, the only other demigod powerful enough to defeat their enemy at the time.

"Percy, you have to eat." Chiron pushed a plate of pizza towards the boy, who stared at the food with empty eyes. There was a blue coke beside the plate but he barely even noticed it. "I have some ambrosia for you." Chiron prodded. Percy remained unresponsive. Chiron sighed; another failed attempt under the belt.

Percy was still lost in his thoughts. Jason thought he was unneeded, perhaps. Maybe he thought that they were better off without him. Did he believe that the loss of Percy would have a deeper effect on the group as a whole?

In Annabeth, certainly, she would have been devastated. But the more Percy thought about it, the more he realized how important Jason was to their group. He had a deeper connection with the members than Percy ever did.

Hazel and Frank had known Jason before the switch, being in the same cohort as him. They were friends before Hazel and Frank knew Percy existed, and though they still loved Percy, he knew Jason's loss devastated them in ways his passing never would.

Why was he thinking about this? Percy had no idea. Somewhere his mind echoed how toxic this line of thought was. He didn't care.

Piper didn't do much other than cry, eat, and throw knives. She was also more aggressive and used Annabeth as a shoulder to cry on when being angry got exhausting. She had taken to sleeping in Cabin One, and upon not being struck down by Zeus himself the others came to the conclusion that Zeus was being more lenient than usual. Her siblings tried to help but Piper longed for a semblance of normalcy, seeking out friends of Selina to help her forget. In her searches she found Clarisse, who, softened towards Piper from Jason's death, ended up being a considerate friend.

Leo was unseen, disappearing to corners to stare at old pictures that were becoming slowly covered in salty tears, Jason's face in that labrador-grin he was famous for. There was some silly photos, the child of Jupiter seemingly flawless in all of them, unthinkably photogenic. Leo used to tease him all the time about it; now he never would again. Leo cried for his best friend, the one that always knew what to say and when, awkward at the best of times and so very protective.

Hazel and Frank were never seen without each other, taking long walks on the beach and spending time in trees, staring at the sky. The two were the least tear-filled of the seven, having each other for support. Hazel and Frank were Roman as well; they understood sacrifice all too well, and knew their friend would be waiting for them in Elysium.

Annabeth was depressed that Jason was gone but was also immensely worried about Percy. Ever since the harsh battle was over and everyone had convened at Camp Half-Blood, he hadn't shed a single tear.

The battle had ended and the demigods had recuperated at the camp, keeping a watchful eye for Percy and Jason as search parties were sent out for the missing demigods. They had initially been delighted to see Percy's figure appear over the hill, but it became quickly apparent that something was wrong. For one, he was walking as if it were a curse, each step heavy-set and tired. For two, he was carrying a mangled figure in his arms when he shouldn't be carrying anything with the wounds he had.

Demigods rushed to help him and flinched at his hardened eyes. They were tired but cold, and Percy had surveyed the circle of concern.

"Percy?" Annabeth had asked almost tentatively. The last time she had seen him like this was in Tartarus.

The son of the sea god had turned his gaze to Annabeth. She saw the immense pain swimming in them and almost took a step back.

"What is…" she gestured to the unidentifiable figure in his arms. Percy stared down at it as if it were the only thing anchoring him to this world. He sat down and laid the body on the grass of the hill. The demigods around him exchanged nervous glances: they had never seen Percy like this before. The rest of the prophesied seven had showed up.

Without a word, Percy shuffled with something in his pocket before placing a scrap of purple fabric with the letters "SPQR" emblazoned on them onto the body. He said one word, the only word to come out of his mouth since he had arrived at the camp.

"Jason."

A wail had started up.

Jason had left behind more heartbreak than he had thought he would. Of that Percy was certain.

"What's even going on?" the voice was snarky and chilled.

"One of the seven was killed… everyone's in mourning."

"When?"

"A month ago, or so…" the second voice trailed off, hidden grief cloaked in her tone.

"Oh. They're still mourning? Is he mourning too?" the first voice had not lost its disdainful edge.

Two girls stopped in front of Percy, a deer-in-headlights expression on one's face. Percy stared up at them with dead eyes, slouched on a bench. He twitched at their words.

"That's Percy Jackson. He was really close to Jason, remember?" the second, more consolidating girl murmured. She respectfully kept her eyes to the ground and nodded in his direction.

"Well… Jason sounds kinda like a drag anyway," the first girl sniffed.

Percy jerked. The other girl paled considerably. "Oh gods. Uh, please don't listen to her, she's new-"

"Ugh, shut up. I know what I'm saying and I- uh," she broke off stammering. Percy had drawn himself up to his full height and was towering over her, years of pent up pain and hardships showing in his eyes. He leveled his steely glare on them and they squeaked, running off.

Percy sighed deeply, slouching onto the bench again. Annabeth, having seen the whole interaction, approached him.

"Percy, please say something. You have to let out your emotions, it's healthy," she prodded, sitting down gently beside him. Percy considered this. But it was so easy to just… stop. When someone's death was avoidable, maybe, and your fault, possibly, it was easy to just… stop.

"Percy, we're all hurting. And we still don't know what happened. It's been a month, certainly not enough time but more than a week. Let us help you." Annabeth reached out to Percy's shoulder reassuringly. "You need to come to terms with his death. Jason Grace is dead."

The words jarred him more than it should have and he felt his eyes fill with tears. "No," he choked out. Annabeth noted his first words in a month with slightly widened eyes but simply tried to console the broken boy. "No, he can't be."

"I'm sorry, Percy," she said softly, rubbing his back in slow circles.

And Percy sobbed, for the first time since his friend's death. Because he couldn't deny it any longer. There was no way for him to stay unfeeling and cold and detached.

Because Jason Grace was dead.

And nothing could ever be the same again.