IMPORTANT A/N:

I'm sorry but I ended up starting a new story, OTL.

It takes place in middle school, so all the characters are fourteen. And I apologise for any OOC-ness throughout the story.

Also, I am in NO WAY pro-ana and STRONGLY discourage it. That is not the purpose of this story. I've just had the urge to write about anorexia for a while now since I have a somewhat morbid interest in taboo subjects. If you have a problem with reading about anorexia for one reason or another then by all means click the back button now, because this might get quite triggering.

PROLOGUE :: Unnerving Behaviour

"Hey," Ruka called from across the hall. He jogged over to his best friend currently lying spread-eagled on the stage.

Natsume spared a glance in his direction. "Yo."

"Uh... Natsume?" Ruka asked, one eyebrow raised uncertainly, as he stood over the black-haired teen. "... What are you doing?"

Natsume shifted slightly. "Thinking."

"... Right."

All of a sudden, Natsume jerked up into a sitting position as if having woken from a nightmare. "Damn," he muttered irritably.

"U-um-"

Natsume shook his head slightly at the startled blonde as he slowly stood up. "Don't worry, Ruka. It's nothing."

As much as you say that, Natsume... Ruka thought to himself as he watched Natsume's figure, hunched in thought, exit the gym hall. I know there's something you're not telling me.

The same worries plagued Ruka's mind the next morning as the boys strolled towards their classroom ten minutes late.

"Natsume..." he began, and the serious tone to his voice immediately set Natsume on edge.

Natsume sighed. "Look, Ruka, if this is about yesterday night-"

"I just want to know what was going on. You were acting seriously weird." Ruka pursed his lips. "You still are, in fact. You've barely said anything to me all morning."

At that moment, a group of elementary school girls sidled past, giggling and whispering amongst themselves and shooting the pair meaningful looks as they passed.

Natsume's attention didn't leave them until they were out of sight - he could feel himself almost physically shrinking into himself from the unwanted attention.

Ruka noticed, of course. He almost mentioned it, but decided it might be best to leave whatever was troubling Natsume be for the moment. His best friend was obviously not in a conversational mood, and nagging him about it would likely lead to being snapped at.

They spent the rest of the journey to homeroom in a silence bordering on awkward, and the fact that Natsume almost shut the classroom door in Ruka's face (whether purposely or not, Ruka wasn't sure) both irritated and frightened the blonde to no end.

Splash!

Natsume shivered as the icy water trickled down his chin and neck.

What's wrong with me? he asked himself as he once again drenched himself with chilly tap water. Natsume paused, slowly blinking the water out of his eyes as his vision cleared up.

The fourteen-year-old face that was reflected back at him from the bathroom mirror was frowning, and to a trained eye such as Natsume's, many emotions could be seen in the depths of those crimson eyes, flickering back and forth like an old movie reel. The frown deepened and the short eyebrows furrowed in mild displeasure at the sight. Honestly, I really don't know why I have an fanclub at all. Ruka's much more good-looking than me, and has the princely attitude to boot. Natsume let out a weak chuckle at the thought of his best friend as a prince.

However, the smirk quickly dissipated as his attention was once again drawn to the plain face in the mirror. Yeah, I'm just your average asshole with pasty skin, a crooked nose and freakish red eyes. It's Ruka who's every girl's ideal prince charming, not me.

Not me.