MAZE - Alternate Ending to Me Before You beginning from the chapter where Louisa Clark goes into the maze. I ADDED AN EPILOGUE. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT A NEW CHAPTER SO IT'S JUST AT THE END OF MY DOC. THANKS!
I had broken up with my boyfriend a week ago. Soon after my birthday dinner. Patrick was so consumed with jealousy that he was intolerable. He couldn't stand seeing me feeding another man. And he saw how charming and handsome Will was. He just couldn't handle it even though prior to meeting Will, he imagined Will was going to be the Hunchback of Notre Dame. I guess Patrick saw something there that I didn't know could have existed.
And then Will generously offered the the spare bedroom of the annexe to me. So not only did Will and I spend all my working hours together, we also spent weekends and nights watching movies or talking or reading. I tried to play boardgames with Will but he thought I was cheating bc I had to move all the pieces around. We had become friends. It was like we were an old married couple who lived a quiet country life. Not sure if Will felt that way.
If the weather was nice we would go out. Tonight we decided to stay close to home because there seemed to be an impending rainstorm.
We were at the castle near the entrance to the maze. Will's father always let him come down to the castle after hours.
"Come, Clark. Let's have a go at the maze. I know it by heart so you try it and I'll time you."
"I think we should just head back." I said looking at the maze nervously.
"Oh don't be a chicken. It's really quite simple. Just try to remember all the turns you make and then reverse them. Or we could just go back and watch a boring movie in the boring annexe."
I hesitated bc I was not sure if I could go in there again. But maybe I needed to face my fears and tell them to piss off. So I took a deep breath and walked into the maze. I tried to keep track - left, left, right, straight, left, what was that? Someone standing at the next turn? Crap. Which way was I going? Maybe this way. Left. Right. Right. Is there someone behind me? The events of that horrific night 8 years ago came flooding back all around me. A hand grabbing my hair. Someone kissing me. Then passing me to another. So many hands grabbing my shirt. My shoes went missing. I crouched down, trying to push the phantom hands away from me.
"Will! Will! Will!" I just kept calling his name. Trembling. Sobbing.
"Clark! Clark! Where are -"
And there he was coming around the turn. I didn't wait for him to reach me. I shot up and sprinted to him and climbed into his lap.
"Please I want to get out." Silently he drove out of the maze. With my face buried in his neck, sobbing until his collar was wet with my tears. I hadn't realized that Will had stopped right at the entrance of the maze until he started to nudge my face. I wasn't sure if I could tell him. But he started whispering in my ear "it's alright now. We're out. I'm sorry I egged you on. It was stupid and if I had known you were going to be so afraid, Clark… I'm ... I'm just so sorry."
Will kept trying to get me to look at him. Rubbing his cheek against mine saying "talk to me when you're ready." I felt safe hearing his voice. And when I finally picked my head up, I took a deep breath and told him "something happened a long time ago. I was so drunk and there were these boys I knew. I was just so stupid. I was flirting. I didn't know what was happening. My sister found me in the middle of the maze and brought me home. I've never told anyone about that night." I felt so ashamed I couldn't even coherently tell him that I had been raped in the maze. But looking in his eyes, I could tell that he understood. His eyes went from sympathetic to angry.
"Will, say something." I whispered.
"If I wasn't stuck to this fucking wheelchair I would go hunt down every one of those assholes for hurting you!"
"Shh... I'm okay now. I've tried all these years to repress all the memories from that night. Going back into the maze tonight just brought everything back."
I put my head on Will's shoulder. It felt like my refuge. I had finally been able to release that awful secret that I had kept hidden from everyone. "It wasn't your fault, Clark." My head felt lighter. Maybe it was from all the crying or just hearing those words. Will began humming. "Why are you doing that?" I asked.
"I'm trying to calm down. All I want to do right now is wrap my arms around you and I can't."
For a second I was surprised by Will's desire for physical interaction. But at that moment, I didn't care that Will was in a wheelchair and couldn't move his arms. The maze had made me feel so vulnerable. My legs felt like wobbly jello. And Will's attempt to comfort me was very sweet. This must be a I-feel-sorry-for-Lou version of Will. But I didn't care. I wrapped my arms around Will's chest and buried my face further into his neck. "I'm better now. I'm glad I told you. I feel surprisingly better."
….
WILL
What a crazy night! I'm angry, happy, sad, worried all at the same time. Maybe I need a psych evaluation. Poor Clark. I can't believe she was raped. This sweet innocent girl. What an arse I was telling her to go into the maze! I am a total arse. I'm so glad Nathan was here when we got back. She was passed out on my lap. Nathan thought she was hurt and was so alarmed when he saw me wheeling her into the annexe. After he put her into bed, he tried to get me to tell him what happened. But I couldn't. The thought of men hurting Clark was unbearable. I was raging inside. I'm sure Nathan thought my face was going to explode. I was so angry. I finally calmed down when he put me into bed and turned on some music. I'm glad Clark is here. Well I wish she was closer. But the next room over is good enough. I can check on her tomorrow morning. Make sure she's okay. I just wanted to kiss her to make her feel better. I'll have to be rude so she doesn't think I pity her. Is that what I should do? Or maybe be nicer to her? So frustrating.
...
I must have fallen asleep in Will's lap because when I woke, I was in bed in the guest bedroom. It was just a bit past midnight. I could hear music coming from his room. Walking to his room, the lights were off and Will was in bed, his eyes opened when I entered. "Hey. Sorry, I must have exhausted myself with all that crying." Truthfully I was a bit embarrassed that I was supposed to be taking care of Will but tonight he had to take care of me instead and now I've woken him up from his sleep.
"Hi. You were pretty passed out. Nathan put you in bed." He whispered.
I wanted to feel that same security that I felt at the maze. My eyes were looking at all the empty space in Will's bed. It would be inappropriate for me to get into bed with my boss. It was inappropriate for me to sit on his lap and cry. It was probably inappropriate for me to fall asleep while sitting on his lap and for him to drive me back in his wheelchair to the annexe. But my heart felt so raw after divulging my past. I wanted to feel comforted.
I've become so adept at anticipating Will's needs just by looking at his eyes. I could tell just by where his eyes shifted what he wanted to do or eat. I was surprised that Will was also attuned to my silent request.
Will nodded. And without further hesitation I jumped into the large bed and grabbed Will's hand and buried my face into his neck. "Okay?"
"Yes, Clark. You need some comforting and I don't mind being the comforter. Or the tissue."
Mildly offended by the tissue remark, I quickly got over it bc I knew I was going to be laundering that shirt tomorrow.
"Will, did I wake you or were you not asleep yet?"
"No. I actually couldn't fall asleep."
"Were you thinking about what I had told you."
"Yes."
"Don't feel bad for me. I'm okay. Really."
"I just wish I could do something for you."
"You are."
I think we were both tired so it was a long time before either of us spoke again. I lifted my head up to look at Will. And my movement made his eyes open. "Hm?"
"I can't fall asleep either."
"How do you know I was not asleep?"
My hand had been resting on his chest. "I can tell from your breathing." Just then my stomach rumbled. "Oops. I must be a little hungry." I got up, and the moment I released my grip on Will's hand and got out of his bed, I felt so odd. Like I forgot something. I must have been holding his hand very tightly. I could hear Will exhale and trying to hide his emotion. I think we had both just discovered that our intimacy and familiarity was something we crave and the closer we became the harder it was to be apart.
"I'll just make a snack and be right back. If that's alright. I think I would rather not be alone tonight." I felt like I was begging to be accepted back into his bed. A little desperate on my part. But Will could not refuse my request.
"Come back soon."
I reheated some of Will's soup and brought it on a tray. I was debating whether I should curl back up next to Will but wasn't sure if I would get soup all over the sheets. My rumbling stomach set my priorities straight for me. I put the tray over Will's legs and sat cross legged facing him. I guess this was good too. I could see his face and it had a calming effect.
I spooned some soup into my mouth. I scooped another spoonful and held it to Will's lips. He opened his mouth. And that's how we finished our bowl of soup. Neither of us spoke. My throat was still dry from my sobbing. One bowl. One spoon. One napkin even. I quickly removed the tray and brought it to the kitchen.
I came back as soon as I had loaded it all into the dishwasher. Making sure to be as quiet as possible in case Will fell asleep.
When I returned to his room, Will was asleep. I stood at the door wondering if I should return to the guest bedroom. I knew I needed him. I didn't see Will as a man in a wheelchair. He became my carer tonight. My guardian angel. He would have protected me if he knew me back then. He would have led me out of the maze. He would not have let those boys take advantage of me.
I made up my mind. I quickly changed into one of Will's tshirts and climbed under his covers, held his hand and pressed my face into his neck.
The next morning Nathan found us both still asleep. He tapped my shoulder and pointed at his watch. I tried to get out of bed but realized I was still holding Will's hand. I silently tried to explain to Nathan that I was stuck and that he should just come back later. But unfortunately Nathan was on a schedule and did not like to deviate. I very unwillingly unhinged my hand from Will's. It wasn't that difficult despite my earlier protest. Will woke up immediately and saw that I was still in his bed wearing one of his shirts. A big smile came across his face and he was about to say something when Nathan just had to clear his throat.
"oh. Good morning, Nathan." He said with a bit of embarrassment. "Um, Clark was just checking my pulse..."
Nathan just rolled his eyes and began his morning routine while I slipped out and ran red faced to the bathroom to shower.
When Nathan emerged from the bedroom, I was in the kitchen, he came over to me with a puzzled look and said "he asked if you could bring him some soup?"
I had to cover my face because I could feel it burning. "Okay, thanks, Nathan. I'll be right there." Nathan rolled his eyes again and went to prepare Will's medicine.
I went over to see Will. "Did you really want soup or would you settle for a cup of tea instead? And thank you for taking care of me last night. I'm so sorry. It'll never happen again." I was about to walk out but Will's eyes looked over to the spot where I slept last night. I climbed in and snuggled as close as I could. "Will, I really shouldn't. I just really needed to be with someone last night. And that maze just brought back awful awful memories. And I didn't think I could stand being alone. I'm okay now. Thanks, Will." But as I said that, I found myself grasping his hand tighter and rubbing the back of his hand.
"Clark, I enjoyed last night. Although I am sorry for making you go into the maze and I'm sorry you had to recount a living nightmare. Please forgive me."
"I'm okay. It felt good to let it all out. And I enjoyed our evening too."
"I didn't realize how much I had missed being close to a woman. It's been a long time. And I liked taking care of you. For a change. Do you think you would like to go on some more outings with me?"
I smiled at Will and kissed him on the cheek. "Are you saying you want to date? Are you on new meds?" I asked playfully.
Will let out a loud laugh but then sobered up immediately. "Maybe we shouldn't. I wouldn't be much of a boyfriend."
"Well you've got me to be your hands. We are already living together. Albeit in separate rooms, but under the same roof. And I've already seen your backside numerous times. I think I would be okay with it."
"And I wouldn't mind if you felt like climbing in my bed again tonight." Will said quietly.
I stepped outside the annexe to get something from the car and Mrs. Traynor was there.
"How's Will this morning?"
"Great."
"Do you know what was going on last night? I came home very late and heard music coming from the annexe."
"Oh, Will said he was not sleepy. He slept in this morning."
"That's so unlike him. Hm..."
"I better go back in to see if he needs anything. Nathan's with him right now. I was just out for some fresh air." That was awkward.
After Nathan left, Will and I went to the far end of the castle. It was quite a long and at times steep walk for me. I was a bit worried how I was going to walk back without breaking an ankle or two. But it was a part of the castle that was restricted to tourists and Will said the view from the top was breathtaking. I had packed a picnic for us. When we arrived at the top, I laid out the blanket on the grass and then continued to unpack our lunch.
"I wish I had met you before this." Will suddenly said.
"You would not have even noticed me back then." I said as I fed him a piece of the sandwich.
"Yes I would. How could anyone not have noticed your exotic sense of fashion? My eyes worked perfectly fine back then and as they do now."
"Stop teasing, Will Traynor, or you're going to have to figure out a way to eat your own lunch." Just as I fed him him another piece of sandwich, Will nipped my finger.
"Will! You!" I couldn't stop laughing.
We spent the rest of the afternoon eating and talking all while I sat on Will's lap. He still occasionally tried to bite my finger to get my attention away from the view. I guess this was his equivalent to pulling a girl's pigtails to show her that he had a crush on her. And since he couldn't use his hands he used his teeth. We shared our feelings. It was cringeworthy but true. I told him so many times I wanted to pour his cup of tea over his head for being so rude to me. He told me in the beginning he wanted to tape my mouth shut every time I smiled.
We were outside for so long that the sun was setting and the path was beginning to get dark. "Will, the stars are out. I think we should head back now." Although I was dreading the walk back. I knew Nathan would be back in the evening and expecting to complete the night routine without the awkwardness of the morning.
"Clark, hold onto me before you break your neck. Actually, if you would, get the flashlight from my bag and light the way. And then climb on the Will Traynor Express. I'll get you back in one piece."
Well I couldn't turn down the offer of a wheelchair ride back. Will knew the castle grounds since he was little. I knew I could trust him to take care of me. So I got on his lap and Will thought it would be hilarious to go at full speed. I clutched his neck and tried to wrap my legs around his legs, I was terrified but laughing. The flashlight I held was useless because my arms were wrapped around Will. But Will knew the way even in the dark. When we arrived at the annexe Will was beaming. Even when he caught sight of Nathan standing at the door. "Oops. We tried to get back as quickly as we could bc we knew you were waiting." I said.
"That's very considerate of you both to think of me while on a date." Nathan responded quite sarcastically.
"That was not a date, Nathan." I said. "Well I couldn't possibly walk across the cobblestones in these shoes. Will took pity and gave me a ride. That's all."
"Sure. If you say so." responded Nathan.
I turned to look at Will and he was still beaming. Not paying any attention to Nathan. He really enjoyed that rush down the hill.
...
WILL
What is going to hurt today? Head feels okay. Stomach feels okay. Hand feels okay. Hmmm? I could actually feel my whole hand. But I can't move it. I open my eyes and Louisa Clark is curled up right next to me clutching my hand. And I can feel her hand. That's weird.
I have a beautiful girl lying close to me asleep, she's practically on top of me. Such a familiar feeling having a woman in bed with me and yet Clark is definitely not like any of the women I have ever dated. I don't understand how in my diminished state she could still like me. I am rich and she is poor, but that's not the reason. She needed a job and I needed someone to feed me. And I like it when she feeds me. She feeds me with her fingers. Her fingertips touch my lips and sometimes my tongue would touch her fingertips. She didn't cringe or wipe her fingers right away. I think she just did it out of habit. It was quite sensual but I did not want to make her feel uncomfortable so I just ate without showing her how it turned me on. Not like it would show anyways. I'm a non-functional man. I hate it. But still, she's here. Next to me. Holding my hand.
I'm so glad I asked her to move in after she and Patrick broke up. She didn't even cry about it. So it was probably over before they even knew it. And now I get to see Clark morning, afternoon and night. I can't even get her out of my bed. Ever since that night at the maze. She just climbs into my bed and hugs me. Maybe she thinks I'm a giant stuffed animal. I can't move anyways. So she just cuddles up to me and we talk and then fall asleep. I hope she doesn't expect more than this. I know it's selfish but i feel so much happier when she's around. I love it when she reads a book that I've recommended or watches a movie with me that she's never seen before. I can't believe she's never been anywhere. Especially the way she dresses. You'd think she had spent time living on another planet. But it's her. She's unique and she's not afraid to tell me if I'm acting like an arse.
"Good morning, Will."
"Am I your teddy bear?"
"Yes, a very good one too. You don't move and you barely snore. I think I will keep you and name you Brownie. And maybe later I'll play dress up with you."
God she makes me laugh. I never know what she's going to say. That's a nice way to wake up.
"Looks nice today. Let's go out. How about a museum?"
"Alright."
What's happening to me? I used to go rock climbing and sky diving on the weekends. Now this pretty girl says she wants to be indoors and look at art and I say okay. Something must be going on. My brain must be impaired. That would explain the sensations I am feeling in my hands. Maybe I'm falling in love.
...
We spent as much time away from the annexe as possible. One day, it was so comfortably warm outside that I had this crazy idea to do some backyard camping. Nathan did not entirely approve but Will had become such a happier man that it was hard to say no. Will used to camp all the time before the accident and I thought with his knowledge combined with my enthusiastic inexperience, it would be a fun night.
Nathan didn't think he could get Will into a tent so we thought of other sleeping alternatives. The best thing we came up with was an air mattress with lots of pillows. I tried tying some flat sheets together to make a canopy. When Will came out in his pyjamas that evening he took one look and laughed so hard. "I think it looks rather cozy." I said slightly offended. But maybe it did look a little funny. Will just shook his head. Probably never camped like this before.
Nathan got him onto the bed and I tried to set up our evening movie. The wifi did not work very well outside the annexe.
"Clark, sorry about before. This is very nice. Thank you. Where are you going to sleep?"
"Well, I…um…was just going to leave you out here because the wifi does not work."
I had been sitting close to Will and was about to get up to put the laptop away when I felt a tug on my shirt. Will's hand had grabbed the edge of my shirt.
"Will! Will! Your hand!"
Will had acted out of impulse and did not even realize he had moved his hand. I ran back to the annexe to see if Nathan was still there and he was just packing up when I ran in. "Nathan, come quickly!"
Nathan and I ran back to the makeshift tent. "What happened?! Are you alright, Will?!"
Will was just staring at his hand. "Nathan, look at his hand! He's moving it!"
We were all in shock and really couldn't say anything. Until Will said "Louisa Clark. Look what you have done to me." He had tears in his eyes. As I did. As Nathan did as well.
"Shall I call your parents down to see you, Will?" I asked.
"No, I don't want to get their hopes up. It's just a hand."
After Nathan checked his pulse and massaged his hand and arm a little, he left us. Seeing there was nothing more he could do.
I had brought my overnight bag with me to the tent and was going to head back to the annexe to get changed into my pajamas. But Will insisted I stay and change in the tent. He promised to close his eyes. As it was getting dark I agreed. I quickly changed into my t-shirt and kept looking at Will to make sure his eyes were closed.
"Clark. Will you call the doctor for me tomorrow? I'm feeling tingly."
"Is there anything I can do? Should I try to get Nathan back?" I said worrying.
"No, I think it's a good tingly feeling. And you are the cause. You must be the quadriplegic cure."
"Which part is tingly?"
"Well, I kept my eyes closed when you were changing but I couldn't stop my imagination from happening." Will said slightly embarrassed.
"Oh!" Will Traynor was having indecent thoughts about me. Ha!
We just snuggled for the rest of the night. Will's hand was like a new toy. I held it and stared at it to see if there was anything different. He was able to pull my hair when I turned over away from him. This was just a small taste of Will. I wonder what Will would be like with all his limbs functioning.
"Will, you think you'll be able to move your other hand?"
"If you keep undressing near me, it will just be a matter of time before I'm able to move all my hands and legs and do jumping jacks."
I jokingly smacked Will on the chest. He didn't flinch but I felt his hand moving on the small of my back where it had been resting.
"Will, you think you'll be able to give me a hug soon?"
"That's my goal. I miss being a man."
"Will, you are a man."
"I tried so hard the first year after the accident. And then the next year I nearly gave up. And now I understand that I was just missing the proper motivation. You, Louisa Clark, came into my life when I did not want to go on living. Have you ever heard of Dignitas?"
"Yes, and I know all about your plans." I said sheepishly.
"Well, Clark. I didn't think anything or anyone was going to change my mind. But this hand has decided for me. You make me weak. I don't think I have the courage to go through with it after tonight."
"Yes!" I screamed. I was so ecstatic I jumped off the bed and started screaming. I did it! I made Will change his mind! Will just laughed at me. I jumped back on the bed and climbed on top of Will, grabbed his head and kissed him.
After a few minutes, we heard Mr. and Mrs. Traynor yelling "Will! Will! What's wrong?!"
They entered our little tent area and were beyond shocked to see me straddled over Will. My face must have turned bright red. Will was also blushing. I quickly got up and stood next to the bed.
"It's alright. Everything's okay. You can go back to the house now. Please go." Will urged them.
"What is going on here, Miss Clark? We heard you screaming and we thought Will was in trouble." asked Mrs. Traynor in a very icy tone.
"Well, well, well, um." My red hot face was preventing any words from escaping.
"Look." And Will lifted his hand.
Mr. Traynor shouted hooray and Mrs. Traynor just opened her mouth. She was so overcome with emotion. But being the proper Englishwoman, she simply said "well, we will send for the doctor tomorrow and um… we'll just leave you to it. Good night." And they returned to the main house.
"Please come back and resume your previous position, Clark."
I gladly complied. But looked behind me first to make sure Mr. and Mrs. Traynor were not standing right outside. I gave a great sigh when I knew it was just the two of us again. "Phew! That was a bit shocking for your parents."
"Seeing my hand move or you on top of me?"
"I guess both were equally shocking." We just laughed and laughed and eventually fell asleep.
The next morning, Will woke up before me and he discovered Nathan standing at the foot of the bed. "Nathan, please knock before you come in next time." Will said.
"Okay Romeo, I've got the doctor coming in half an hour. I've got to get you back to the annexe."
I woke up from all the noise Nathan was making. "Good morning, Nathan! That was fun sleeping outside. Can we do it again, Will?"
"I think next time we need a tent that has a zipper and lock to keep out all the unwanted visitors."
Nathan looked confused and I said "Will's parents rushed in when they heard me screaming."
Nathan looked even more confused and covered his ears not wanting to hear the reason for my screaming. I pulled his hands from his ears and said triumphantly "No more Switzerland!"
Now it was Nathan's turn to scream and hug me. Will has been one of his patients from the very beginning. They weren't exactly best friends, but Nathan really felt a lot of sympathy for Will and was respectful of Will's grim choice.
"Ahem. When you two have stopped your flirting, maybe we can go inside." said Will a bit annoyed.
Nathan and I quickly deflated the air mattress and untied the flat sheets. The previous night I had carried everything out piecemeal. Setting it all up carefully. But we were in a hurry now to see the doctor and after Nathan put Will in his wheelchair I put everything on Will's lap and it nearly touched his chin. He looked amused. He's never had to act like the porter. I looked at him and just shrugged my shoulders while I carried my own overnight bag. "Oh just put your bag on the rest of the pile." Will said.
"Don't mind if I do!" And remembering that I was still in my pajamas I ran back barefoot to the annexe. Leaving Nathan and Will to get everything back.
When I emerged from the bathroom, Will and Nathan were in the living room discussing treatment plans. The doctor had come in through the main house and Mrs. Traynor accompanied him. "Good morning, Will. Dr. Thurton is here to see you. I told him about your hand."
"Hello Will. Nathan. And this is?"
"This is Miss Louisa Clark." said Will with a giant smile. Nathan tried to stifle a laugh. Mrs. Traynor looked annoyed.
"How do you do?" I said.
"So tell me what happened last night? What exercises have you been doing? What do you think triggered it?" asked the doctor.
"I think I decided I wanted to hold and kiss Miss Clark more than anything else in the world." said Will very matter of fact.
Mrs. Traynor clutched the wall. She quickly left the annexe.
I felt embarrassed so I quietly left the living room so that the Doctor could continue his examination. Even though I had become so used to Will's body that I should not have felt the way I did. But I think it was what Will said. It finally hit me the weight of his decision. I sat in his room crying. I was so happy. I quickly texted Treena the good news. Her response came immediately. I knew you could do it. xoxo
I tried getting into my morning routine. I put on one of Will's CDs and diligently tidied up. An hour later the doctor left and Nathan went to talk to Mrs. Traynor. Will found me in the spare bedroom. I had never made the bed after the other night. "Hello. I'm hungry. Feed me please" said Will.
I shook my head at his directness and said "Almost done. What did the doctor say?"
"He said you should continue to seduce me and I will be completely healed."
I couldn't help but roll my eyes at him. I said "Did he really use those exact words?"
"Well, that's the PG version of what he said. Do you want me to go into detail?"
"Oh Will, I'm so happy I could just burst!"
"And by the way, I asked Nathan to call a locksmith. The doctor suggested privacy if I was going to get better. I told him about all the interruptions and he thought it best if we could keep the unwanted outside. If you don't mind."
"Will, we don't need to lock the doors." I said. Will's face dropped. "I could just prop a chair behind the door." Will just smiled and with his improved hand, motioned for me to sit down on his lap which I gladly and swiftly did.
"Miss Clark, I do believe you are toying with me. What's your plan for getting my legs to move?"
"I don't know. What did the doctor suggest? Porn? Lap dance? Strip tease?" I asked with a straight face.
Will couldn't hold it in any longer, he burst out laughing and put his hand on my leg and kissed me. We could hear Nathan and Mrs. Traynor talking and walking into the living room. "This is why we need locks!" He didn't wait for me to get off. He just wheeled us right into the living room. Mrs. Traynor, Nathan and I just stared at each other not knowing what to say. Will on the other hand was quite content to show me off. He kept rubbing my leg in front of them.
"Will, that's even more movement. Now your wrist has better range of motion!" exclaimed Nathan.
Mrs. Traynor could not hide her scowl and just left the annexe. "I thought she would be happy that you are getting better." I said.
Nathan explained "she is thrilled but she's not too happy about the treatment plan."
"Which is?"
"The doctor recommended as much time with you as possible." said Nathan.
"What do you have in mind, Clark?" Inquired Will.
So for the next week Will and I decided to go on a series of dates. One night, I found a drive in movie in the next town. And we rented a beautiful red convertible just for that night. Will wanted to sit in the passenger seat like a regular passenger. Nathan was willing to try anything and he said he would come along. Will told him no. He was a grown man that did not require a chaperone.
"You sure you could manage, Lou?" Nathan asked.
"Yes, we'll just watch the movie and come back. You have been hovering way too much ever since Will regained some movement in his hand."
Well I didn't realize that drive in movies are always double features. So maybe it was going to be a late night. The first movie was Casablanca which I had never seen before. I don't know why I ever had a prejudice against black and white movies.
Will was seated comfortably, buckled in the passenger seat with a blanket over his legs. I fed him his dinner as we watched the movie. I was really enjoying the movie and not paying very close attention to where I was putting Will's food.
"Clark. You just put a bit of sandwich in my ear. Are you determined to make me more disabled?"
"sshh! Maybe that can be your motivation. You want to feed yourself or would you like part of your dinner in your ear?"
When the film ended and there was a break before the 2nd film started. I got up and realized I had dropped a lot of crumbs on Will's blanket. I reached over Will, picked up the blanket and started to shake it outside the car. The way my body was positioned, my backside was less than an inch from Will's face.
He placed his hand on the back of my knee to hold me steady. "Don't get too fresh in public, Will Traynor. I bet your mom or Nathan is going to walk by any second now."
Will pulled on my dress and I sat down on his lap and covered us both with the blanket. The second film was about to begin. Whoever thought showing Casablanca first and then Night of the Living Dead next has a weird sense of humor. The film had me hiding under the blanket for most of it. Will thought it was hilarious and just watched me instead of the movie.
"Clark, do you want to leave? Are you really that scared?"
"I'm okay. It's almost over. Ahh!" Zombies are terrifying. I should have done better research on the movie selection.
When it was finally over, we drove home. And I couldn't get the image of the zombies out of my head. So I just kept babbling and babbling to compensate for the fact that I really was scared. And driving towards a gigantic castle that undoubtedly had zombies lurking in every dark corner.
We arrived back at the annexe safe and sound. Nathan was waiting for us to do Will's night routine. "Really, Nathan, I don't know if I can tolerate seeing you before and after our dates." Will said quite rudely.
"Well, Lou is not strong enough to lift you out of the car. So too bad! Oh and Lou, a piece of mail arrived for you. It's on the counter."
I had been giving updates to Treena about Will's progress and she was coming up with ways I could motivate him. I opened the card first and inside Treena wrote, 'ditch your grandma pyjamas. got you something nicer. work some miracles. xoxo' Inside the little envelope was a little silky black nightgown. I stuffed it back into the envelope. Embarrassed if either Will or Nathan saw it. I'll have to find some courage before I put that little piece on. I quickly send Treena a text to let her know I received her gift. Thanks! Got it. seems to be missing a lot of fabric. She quickly replied have some wine and you will find the courage.
I put it away in my bag. Thinking there must be other ways to motivate Will.
...
The following week, Will received an invitation to Alicia's wedding. "Clark, shall we go to a stuffy British wedding and watch my ex-girlfriend and ex-best friend get married?"
"If we go, are you going to get drunk and yell obscenities at the bride and groom?"
"Only a little."
"okay then."
...
I wore the pretty red vintage dress that I wore to the concert bc Will liked it. And Will said the most romantic things to me the whole day. And whirled me around the dance floor. And we got completely and utterly drunk. There was a hotel next door and Will took me there afterwards because of course there was no way I could get behind the wheel. In fact I sat on his lap and he drove his wheelchair to the hotel which was so posh. Even in my drunken state I had to marvel at all the chandeliers. Will wheeled us straight to reception. I tried to stand up but Will said "just stay on my lap. I'll take care of it." So I just rested my head on his shoulder and waited for Will to deal with checking us in and getting the key.
When we got to our room, I got up from his lap and plopped on the bed.
"Clark. You are so drunk."
"I am. I really really am." I helped take Will's shoes off and undress him down to his undershirt. But I really had to use the bathroom. I told Will to give me a second. In the bathroom I quickly relieved myself and tried to wash the makeup off my face. There were some really nice robes in the bathroom so I undressed and put on one of the robes.
And when I came out, Will was just staring out the window. I thought he had drunk as much as I did. I was wondering how I was going to get him out of his chair and into bed. I was determined not to call Nathan.
"Well I guess I'm drunk enough to try anything." I said to myself.
So I really was stronger than I look. I got Will onto the bed on one try. "Will, would you like one of these robes as well? There's another one in the bathroom." I didn't wait for his answer and went to grab the extra robe. Then I took off his undershirt and pants and tried so hard to put the robe on him. We laughed so hard as I was trying to put his second arm through. "Just leave it, Clark. It's not worth anymore effort. I just wasn't meant to fully wear a robe tonight."
I really had given it my all and I even felt more sober as I was trying. And as I was straddled across Will's chest, he pressed his hand into my leg which signalled me to stop trying. Will lifted his eyebrows and pointed his chin to my chest. My robe had opened up during the robe struggle. I quickly pulled it together and climbed off Will. We had been sleeping in the same bed for weeks now but I wore a tshirt to sleep and we held hands and cuddled. It was really very sweet. I wasn't sure if I was ready to do more than that. I didn't think Will was ready for more than that.
Will could sense my hesitation and respected it.
It had been a really long day and both of us were pretty exhausted. We fell asleep soon afterwards.
The next morning, I was up before Will and decided to order some room service for breakfast.
When room service knocked on the door, Will opened his eyes. "Good morning, that was nice."
"What was nice? The bed?"
"Well the bed was nice. But I was referring to falling asleep in this robe. It really is very comfortable. I think I'm going to buy one for each of us."
"Thanks! I love it too! We should really get moving before your mother sends out a search party."
"Now how are you going to get me from the bed to the chair?"
When we finally reached the annexe, Nathan was pacing back and forth. "I'm not even going to ask. You two kids are becoming irresponsible. Do we need to have a talk?"
"Actually Nathan we were being very responsible. We got drunk and did the smart thing and checked into a hotel. You should be proud of us." I said.
Will just drove off the ramp with two robes in his lap and a big smile on his face. "Nathan, can I have a talk with you. And would you mind calling Doctor Thurton?"
"Will, are you okay? I didn't know there was something wrong." I said beginning to become hysterical.
"Calm down, Clark. I just think there's more movement and I wanted to consult the good doctor. Nothing is wrong. And I'd like to speak to Nathan first."
I took a shower and changed into fresh clothes. Will and Nathan were laughing. I wonder what they were so excited about. I made us all some tea and when I brought it in they stopped laughing, like I had been the joke. "Will was just telling me about how you got him out of the chair. Good job, Lou. It's not easy getting a robe on a bloke when you're drunk." said Nathan.
I couldn't even come up with a good come back line bc I was still feeling a bit hungover. "Clark, I can move my other hand." Will said.
"What?! When?! Who?!"
"I thought I felt it last night but I wasn't sure if I was just drunk and imagining it. But Nathan just ran through some exercises with me and I can definitely move my hand. Well not the whole hand but a few fingers."
"Will, that's so wonderful!" I was so happy I just ran over and gave him a kiss. Nathan slipped out of the room without us noticing.
"You really are something, Clark. You really are the cure."
"Really? I never would have guessed that going on dates was going to have any effect."
"Well you've given me a goal. And when I set my mind to something that seems so unattainable, I'm going to try even harder to achieve it."
"You got an eyeful of my chest last night. You should be running a marathon by now."
Nathan knocked on the door and I got off Will's lap. "Doctor Thurton is here Will. Ready?"
After the Doctor left, and Nathan had gone to see another patient. I decided to take Will on a drive. We just drove around at first. I wasn't sure why, but I really wanted to see my parents. So I rung them up and told them that Will and I would be stopping by soon. My mom hung up before I said good bye. I bet she pulled out the vaccuum and the duster and the wipes and cleaned the house. It was only a few minutes before we arrived at my parent's house. Dad was outside setting up the ramp. "Hi, Dad! We're here!"
"Hello Mr. Clark. Sorry to intrude so unexpectedly. Louisa was feeling homesick. I've been keeping her so busy that she hasn't been home quite as often."
"Oh it's alright. We know she's just on the other side of the castle. And she sends us pictures from her phone. She just sent us the one of you two at the wedding."
We went in to my parent's little home and my mom was trying to put the vaccuum and duster away. "Hello, Will. How are you?"
We told them about Will's latest improvements and my parents were so happy. My Dad got up and slapped Will's shoulder. My Mom gave Will a kiss on the cheek and then a gentle hug. Will was not expecting my parents to have such a reaction, especially since his own parents hadn't said much to him since our backyard camping night.
"Thank you. That really means a lot to me. Thank you for Louisa. She has been my rock." Mom and Dad just beamed. They were so proud of me and I think they must have been proud of Will too. Mom sat closer to Will and held his hand. She was crying. "Stay for supper kids. I'll make a special cake to celebrate."
"Clark, your parents are super. They really are."
"I know. They are just the best. And hearing about your progress has really lifted their spirits. They've been so worried about Dad's job." I guess seeing Will's achievements has really helped them be grateful for their own well being. I saw Mom and Dad looking at each other after they got up. They were happy to be alive and healthy.
Dinner was so much fun. Will charmed my parents. Telling them stories about all his crazy adventures before his accident. Mom started to cry. "What a life you used to have, Will. I'm sure you must miss it."
"Don't feel sorry for me, Josie. If I hadn't had the accident, I would never have met Louisa."
That just made Mom cry even harder.
Treena was the only one in my family who knew that Will and I had become couple. After dinner, Will asked my father if he could have a beer with him and of course my Dad happily grabbed a couple of beers out of the fridge and they headed outside away from us women.
...
WILL
"Mr. Clark, so I just wanted to let you know that Louisa has become very important to me and she is the reason my hands can move now. I'm hopeful that my legs will come around as well. I already feel some sensation in them. So I'm hoping you won't object given my present state, but if you would just consider what my future state would be, to give me your blessing. Louisa and I have been dating and I don't think I can live without her. It's going to take a while, but when I'm healed, I'll get a job and move out of the annexe. And then I am going to ask her to marry me."
"Does Louisa know about this?"
"No. I was hoping to get your blessing first before I asked her out on a date."
"But you just said you two were dating."
"Yes, but she organizes those dates. It's complete role reversal. She drives me, she feeds me, she does so much for me now. When I can be a man again, I want to take care of her."
Mr. Clark took my hand and shook it. "Will, you are a man and I'm so proud of you. You have my blessing."
I don't know if I would have let my daughter date a quadriplegic. What good could possibly come out of it? We probably couldn't have children. She'd probably be stuck at home wiping my ass. But to have another man confirm that I was indeed a man was powerful for me. I felt trusted. I need to make plans so that I can get better faster. I'll ring Nathan when I get back. Maybe do some more therapy. Maybe water therapy. Maybe I just needed more Louisa Clark therapy. I can't believe I saw her beautiful chest and couldn't do anything about it. Must work harder to get better.
...
Our short drive back to the annexe was quiet. Will was thinking and whatever it was made him very happy. "I love your parents, Clark. I think I love them more than my own."
"It's hard not to love them. Warts and all."
"They're perfect."
Over the next several months, Will went to physical therapy 5 times a week. Nathan still came every day but his role seemed to have shifted from medical carer to friend. With Will's improved movement in his hands, the two of them started playing poker. Will couldn't hold the cards quite properly yet so we put a little screen in front of his cards. I tried playing with them a few times, but Will and Nathan were enjoying the male bonding time. Then my father started to join their weekly games.
That gave me time to begin my own studies. I registered for night classes at the local college. Studying fashion and I loved it. It was just my cup of tea. I would come back to the annexe with a bag full of magazines and fabrics. All my savings were going towards my education. My parents were proud of me, Will said he was proud of me, but most importantly I finally felt proud of myself. I was doing something for myself, by myself. It was the most extraordinary feeling to make oneself happy.
Will noticed I was spending a bit less time with him because of school. He was thrilled that I was finally doing something with my life. Every time he went to his therapy sessions, I went to the library to study. He kept offering to pay for my tuition but I wouldn't take it.
One day, I had spent most of the day out to study for an upcoming exam. When I returned back to the annexe that evening, Will was in the living room on the sofa. I've never seen Will on the sofa and his wheelchair was not in the room.
I slid my tired body next to his and just clutched his arm. "Hi. What's going on? I thought you were playing poker tonight."
Will slowly wrapped his arms around me. I just cried. I couldn't believe it. Will can hug me now. We sat there hugging each other for a while.
"Clark, I have another surprise for you." Look into the guest bedroom. I got up and slowly walked to the bedroom and discovered that it had been turned into an office, equipped with a sewing machine and magazine rack and a nice sofa.
"Is this for me?"
"I thought you might want a little space of your own. I saved the receipt for everything in case you wanted to exchange it for something else. And maybe this weekend we can go to an art gallery and you can pick out some artwork to hang up."
"I love it! I love everything! Thank you, Will!" I ran to him on the sofa and covered him in kisses. "You are the best boyfriend ever! I love my new office! I love you!"
"I love you too. Nathan thinks that I've improved so much in the past several months, he wants me to take a few days off just to rest my body. I thought maybe after your exam we can go on holiday somewhere."
"I would love to! And that's perfect timing for me but where can we go on such short notice?"
"Well, I actually booked it already. We are going to a resort in Italy. We'll fly out the day after your exam and we'll spend a long weekend relaxing and sunbathing. I've already sorted out the flights and cars and hotel. You just have to pack and show up."
"Will Traynor, you are such a romantic. Always taking care of me."
"You are the one." Will said softly.
The day after my exam, Will and I boarded a flight to Italy. He still needed the wheelchair but he was now able to manage to slide from his wheelchair to his seat on the plane without much assistance.
"Hello kids!" Out popped Nathan's head. He was sitting in the row behind us.
"Nathan! What are you doing here?" I exclaimed. "Are you our chaperone?"
"Will thought it would be fun if I came along. And we got a group rate."
So our romantic getaway was actually not as romantic as I thought it would be. And I thought 3 persons really did not deserve a group rate. I gave Will a very suspicious look and he just smiled and shrugged.
When we arrived at the resort, it was close to dinner time and Will and I settled into our room. I changed into my resort attire and I helped Will change into a polo shirt and slacks. He seemed twitchy. "Are you alright? You seem to be distracted and sweaty. Does something hurt?" I asked.
"No, I'm just hungry. I really want to get to the dining room to eat."
"Alright, alright, hang on, I just have to grab our shoes and we can go."
We got down to the dining room and Will gave the hostess his name. She led us to an outside deck area at the back of the restaurant. The deck was filled with candles and flowers. And my mother's laugh? What?
I look around and I see mom, dad, granddad, Treena and Thomas, and Nathan. I turn to look at Will and he is standing. His hands are resting on a walker. Tears streaming down my face. He's done it. He's finally done it. I could hear my mom and Treena crying. My Dad comes up and pulls a chair up for me and hands me a tissue.
"Thank you for coming everyone. I hope you all had a pleasant flight. I just wanted to say a few words before we eat. The past year has been amazing. I met Louisa Clark and she has healed me inside and out. She is the reason I no longer look like a vagrant. She is the reason I can move now. She is the reason I love my life again. I love you Louisa. And I'm so grateful that you didn't leave me when I was a complete arse. I was pretty bad. Thank you for loving me. You made this all possible. So I'd like to propose a toast to my darling Louisa."
A waiter came by with champagne for everyone. And we all lifted our glasses up. Will continued his speech "To Louisa!...and I'm afraid my movement is still limited so forgive me for not getting down on one knee. Will you marry me?"
I could hear Treena screaming and hugging my mom who was crying her eyes out. The past several months, Will had become mom's golden boy. We began to have weekly dinners at my parent's house and he was doted on and my mom took over the job of feeding him when we were there. And she always made him his favorite desserts. She said he needed to keep up his energy if he was going to be moving around. Maybe because he got my father a good job working at the castle. My parents already considered him a son.
Nathan came up to me and opened a little box. Inside was a beautiful emerald and diamond ring.
"Nathan is my best mate and he's going to help me put the ring on your finger. When you say yes."
My mouth was still open and I had a million happy emotions running through my body.
"I thought this was a romantic getaway for just the two of us, Will. And my whole family is here. And you're standing, actually standing on your legs, in front of all of us asking me to marry you. Yes! Yes, of course!"
A loud cheer followed and more champagne and after I kissed Will, everyone rushed over to hug and kiss us both. When Treena came up to me, she whispered "Your bloke is paying for everything. I couldn't believe it when he called Dad and said he was taking us all on holiday. Told you that little nightgown was going to work miracles! I'm so happy for you!"
Finally, after more champagne and more hugging and kissing and crying, we sat down to eat. "When did you have time to do all this?" I asked.
"Remember your friend who is the travel agent? I called him up a few weeks ago and he helped me plan every detail. Your family flew in this morning. Nathan couldn't fly out until the afternoon so that's why he ended up on our flight. I was so afraid he was going to spoil the surprise."
"Wow! I am so impressed with you Will Traynor! Thank you for taking care of me and my family. I can't remember the last time my parents took a vacation."
"Your mother spoils me so much every time I eat dinner at their house. It's the least I can do to thank her."
"She does, doesn't she? Maybe you are too charming."
"I used to be an arse, remember?"
"Well, of course you were, that was before me."
The end. Thank you for reading.
EPILOGUE
WILL
"Dr. Thurton, now that my legs are semi-functional, can we talk about something?" asked Will almost too embarrassed to ask in front of Nathan.
"Will, I know what you want you're going to ask. I've met your girlfriend before, remember?"
"Actually, she's my fiancée."
"Congratulations! That's wonderful news! I'm so happy for you, Will!" Dr. Thurton shook Will's hand.
"So what's the answer."
Nathan knew what the conversation was leading up to and left the room.
"Will, you love your lady and you want to show her your love and perhaps have children, correct?"
Dr. Thurton was one of the most respected spinal cord specialists. He always gave an honest opinion and that's what Will liked. But he reminded Will of his grandfather. And talking to your grandfather about sex was extremely awkward.
"Yes, do you think it's okay?"
"Will, your body is healing at an incredible rate. I think you would know best if you can handle it or not. All of your plumbing is intact and functioning. Your legs may not be at 100% yet but your arms and hands are working just fine. My advice would be to take it slow at first and then when you both are comfortable, then you can take it to the next level."
"Okay." Will said a bit disappointed.
"Do you need a baseball analogy? Or do you understand?"
"I understand. I was just hoping you would say 'go for it!'.
"Ha! You are young! You are so quick to rush into things. There's no risk in taking it easy at first."
"Are you saying that I can get hurt?"
"Will, you are beginning to exasperate me with your sex questions. Do you need illustrations?"
I was in my office when Will came back from his Doctor's appointment. "I'm in here!" I yelled out when I heard the door to the annexe open.
Will poked his head in. "Hello, my darling. Are you busy?"
"I could spare a minute to give you a kiss."
"Dr. Thurton said all my man parts are good so let's go to the bedroom."
I opened my mouth and let out a sigh. "I'm so happy for you, Will. But I only had a minute to spare remember?" I sat back down on the sofa in my office and picked up the magazine I was studying. To be honest, I didn't tell Will, but sex has been on my mind. He's always had a beautiful face. But his body now had some meat on it. Maybe it's from my mom's weekly meals. Or maybe all the different exercises he does now to strengthen his body. He was really looking hotter than ever.
I was more than a little nervous to do anything more than kiss and hug Will. But if the doctor said it's okay. Maybe we can…No, we should wait. Our wedding date was already set for 2 weeks from now. A very simple family and close friends affair right here at the castle. I think we should wait. I've never been so committed and so serious about any other boyfriend of mine. A bit ironic that with the other boyfriends, sex was so casual. But with Will, I really wanted to be married before we actually do it.
That night, while lying in bed, I said to Will "I'd like to wait til we are official before we try anything more. I would really like to be your wife first. Sounds old fashioned, right?"
"You're right. I would like that as well. Having sex with my wife sounds right. Can we get married tomorrow?"
I rolled my eyes "Patience! By the way, how many children do you think we should have. I'm thinking at least 2."
"Well actually, we should have about 10."
"What!?"
"Mother told me today that her and father want to separate and neither of them want to stay in the main house so we will have plenty of room to raise a large family. We can move in after the wedding. What do you think?"
"Oh! That's so sad. I knew your parents had problems."
"Don't be sad for them. They have been unhappy since I was little."
"Do you want to move in to the main house? It is quite lovely and humongous."
"I have been thinking more about what I want to do now that I am slowly regaining my independence. I was thinking about starting my own consulting firm. In London. What do you think about living in London and then coming back here on the weekends?"
Wow! Louisa Clark living in London and having a weekend house that happens to be a castle.
"I think London is a great idea! I can try to get an internship in one of the fashion houses."
"Then that's settled. We can take our time moving out and find a place in London. You are going to love London. So many more movies to choose from at the movie theatre!"
Our wedding was like a continuation of our Italian getaway. So much food, so much laughter and When the speeches were over and the music began, Will stood up and led me to the dance floor. It was only for a minute (and I spent most of it crying). "Baby, you can't cry every time I stand up. I want you to witness what you have made. No more crying." said Will jokingly.
"You're right. But I just can't help it! I'm so proud of you."
"And I'm proud of you too. Maybe instead of interning, you should think about starting your own line and selling it either in a boutique or online. You know I can help you with that."
"I don't want your money, Will."
"Well, too bad. You're now officially married to my money and I want to make your dreams come true."
Will took my hand and brought me over to his wheelchair. "I thought maybe a whirl around just for old times sake."
Well, our whirl was very romantic and silly. But then Thomas caught sight of us and wriggled free of Treena's arms. He ran to us, pulled me off and jumped on top of Will. "My turn, Uncle Will. My turn!"
I walked away laughing at Will's face. I could hear Thomas screaming "faster, faster!" And then Will's voice yelling "runaway train!" Everyone just laughed. No appalled faces at this wedding.
After all the hugs and kisses, Will and I embarked on our honeymoon. We had decided that we were just going to take a long weekend and later in the year take a longer vacation when the physical therapy sessions could be reduced.
A few hours later we were on a train to Paris. We checked into our hotel which in my opinion resembled a palace. Marble floors, wood furniture, crystal chandeliers everywhere. Our room was fit for a king. Canopy over the bed, giant bathtub, private butler. The butler met us at the elevator and took our bags, brought us champagne and then quietly snuck out.
"What have you planned for us first, Will?"
"First item on the agenda is a bath with my wife. Then some lovemaking. How does that sound, Mrs. Traynor?"
Now this is really the end. I love happy endings where no one dies and everyone really does live happily ever after. Thanks for reading!
