In my life people have always put stuff before me. My dad put himself before his kids and wife. My mom put her sadness and lonely before her two kids. Melanie, my twin sister put her fancy boarding school before me. It didn't mater to her that I was stuck in that house with a drunken mother and her new "friend".

So now guess what mess I got myself in… I kissed Freddie. Yep you heard right Freddie Benson. The nub.

But now it's just one more person in my life that will hurt me. But he's just staring at me now.

"Sorry…" I say regretting what I just did.

"It's cool." He answers back still in shock.

I can't take it anymore so I bolt. I run as fast as I can out of the court yard. I hate myself for acting like this, for letting someone else control my life I can't believe I have fallen in love with such a nerd… a hot nerd!

SNAP OUT OF IT SAM!

He is not going to love you back…

Maybe he will…

He loves Carly not you…

Then why did he kiss me back…

I snap out of my fight thoughts when I look behind my shoulder and see Freddie running after me.

I run as fast and as far as my legs will take me, which is ironically Bushwell Plaza. Then I run up the star ignoring Lubert's yelling about a wet floor.

When I get to Apartment 8-C I realized that it locked but my hands are too shaky to pick the lock I run into 8-D which is surprisingly unlock; who knew Crazy would ever leave the door unlock. As I go in I hear Freddie call my name and start banging on Carly's door. Then see the door knob move I run as fast as I can into Freddie's room and hide in his closet. I hear his foot steps get closer. As I close my eyes he opens the closet door.

"Sam what are you doing here? Didn't you hearing me calling your name?" He asked.

"You expected me to wait for you? That's funny nub!" I said a little snippy.

"Sam you just left, you didn't even let me explain how I feel."

"I know how you feel, you love Carly; you have always loved Carly I get it. I'm just the blonde headed demon you put up with."

"No that not how I feel I got over Carly a long time ago. I don't think I ever really loved it was just puppy love. But I know this isn't puppy love Sam, you and I it's love." He said with a corny smile on his face.

"Oh yeah how do you know that, you thought that you loved Carly and you didn't, what make me different?" I say with a smirk, challenging him.

" Because she never made me feel the way you do, I never got lost in her eyes the way I do with you. She never made me hate but then at the same time still love. Yeah I thought she was the perfect girl for me but then I realized she was too perfect, there wasn't a challenge like there is with you. Everything was too easy with Carly I don't want her I want you." He says challenging me back.

"No…I'm going to lose you like I did everyone else because unfortunately you mean the most to me." I feel so ashamed that I admitted that to him. I never wanted him to see me like this.

"You're not going to lose me I'm right here and I always will be" He tried to hug me but I pushed him away from me.

"You don't know what it's like to lose someone… I've lost everyone I loved and I don't want to lose you." Before I know it I'm crying so I turn away from him.

"When I was 7 my dad walked out on my mom and me. He left us for some bimbo barely legal who he now has another family with. So you can't tell me that I don't know what it's like to lose someone." He said his voice trembling.

"I guess we are both messed up." I say jokily trying to lighten the mood.

"We should be messed up together then" He said with a smile. I hug like there is no tomorrow.

"I've lost my mind" I say as I kiss him. He deepens the kiss put his tongue in my mouth, I put my fingers though his hair.

But then all of a sudden we fall onto the floor and I see Crazy with her eyes all bugged out holding the closet door that we were once behind.

"WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT IS GOING ON?" She yells at the top of her lungs with her face all red.

"Opposites attract." I say with smile then crush my lips into Freddie's

A/N Please tell me what you think it was my first iCarly Fanfic….Please don't be mean. Oh and reviews are our friend.