A/N: Sorry, another story is up when I have other stories in progress. But this is a one-shot.
So I had read the latest chapter of citrus and could not hold myself back from doing a parody of it. It is a parody? Or a AU centered around that certain chapter? IDK, but it's based on Citrus, CH 22, so remember that and be sure to read them if you haven't already.
And spoilers in this chapter. If you had not read Citrus or the latest chapter in general, then read them first before reading this chapter. I don't want to spoil anything for you.
I wrote this in less than 3 hours, cuz I was so tempted to write this and all. So please forgive me for any grammar errors or OC-ness of Lucy or Erza. Let me know what you think after reading this story.
Enjoy?
"This is absolutely the worst…ever." Lucy whined, sitting at the bar, dejectedly drinking her strawberry milkshake.
Mira approached, discerning a depressing aura coming from the blonde mage. "What's wrong?"
"I can't believe she wouldn't give it back." Lucy muttered, not registering the fact that Mira had even talked to her.
"Lucy?" Mira frowned.
"It had so many embarrassing stuff in it. I'm so going to die." Lucy sniffed, slightly trembling from what seemed to be from embarrassment.
Mira slammed a hand on the table to grab the blonde's attention.
Lucy slightly shrieked from the sudden noise and glared at Mira. "What?"
Mira then returned to her stoic posture and smiled at Lucy. "Is everything okay?"
Lucy deeply groaned. "Erza gonna kill me."
Mira cocked her head to the side in confusion. "Why? You both are dating, so why would she kill you?"
Lucy shook her head. "No…she wouldn't. But she would from embarrassment."
"Care to elaborate?" Mira smiled.
Lucy stared at Mira for a moment, debating if she should trust to matchmaker or not. "I don't know if I can trust you. You do spread rumors and stuff. AND to boot, you even told the guild that we were dating! That was supposed to be a secret!"
Mira nervously chuckled. "I'm sorry about that. But at least, no one would try to go after you or Erza now."
Lucy only huffed.
"I'll keep it a secret this time. So, tell me. What's wrong?"
Lucy inwardly sighed and looked around to make sure no one was in hearing range. She turned back to Mira and leaned in. "Erza and I had not been on a date yet. So I was planning on asking her out on a date. But before I could even ask her, she showed me the book that I had written! A book of dates that I would like to do with Erza when we go on a date. There were so many embarrassing stuff in there. That's why I'm gonna die. I don't know what she would do, probably kill me for having these kind of thoughts! And-"
Mira clamped her hand on Lucy's mouth to force her to stop talking. "Okay. So in conclusion, you wrote a journal of what you would to do with Erza, and she stumbled across it, and she wouldn't give it back. That's all?"
Lucy slapped Mira's hand away to talk. "Yes. And I have no idea what Erza's planning. She wouldn't even look at me in the eyes."
Mira smiled and leaned back. "It's Erza we're talking about. If anything, she's really embarrassed to look at you." Mira paused for a second and deviously smirked. "What did you write in there?"
Lucy was silent for a moment, trying to remember what she had written in that journal. "I really can't remember. Just some small stuff, like holding hands during the most romantic times…"
Mira hummed knowingly, and gave Lucy a knowing look. Lucy noticed that and became defensive.
"And it's not like that, Mira!" Lucy whispered harshly, knowing how the barmaid can have lewd thoughts.
Mira chuckled and walked away, assumingly taking some orders from other members. Lucy groaned deeply and dropped her head on the table. "Talking to Mira was a huge mistake…"
…
~Flashback~
Lucy had an exhausting day, Natsu dragged her on a mission that she didn't want to do. Natsu ended up destroying stuff, thus forfeiting their rewards for the damage done. Gray was naked, completely, and had asked Lucy for her underwear…quite literary! And Erza…Lucy doesn't even want to think about that.
Opening the door to her apartment, Lucy immediately knew that something was wrong. Call it intuition, Lucy knew that something was wrong.
Closing the door behind her, Lucy tip-toed into her room and almost screamed out of frustration when it was her girlfriend rustling through her desk.
"God dammit, Erza! How many times do I have to say this!? Do not go through my stuff!" Lucy yelled, attempted to grab a journal that Erza was holding and reading.
Erza was quick and dodged Lucy's reach for the journal. When Lucy realized what she was reading, she became hysterical and jumped Erza, trying to catch her off balance and grab the journal from the Knight.
But to no avail.
"Erza! Give it back!" Lucy whined and yelled continuously.
Erza smirked. "No."
Lucy trembled, staring at Erza. "Why?"
"…Because, don't you have something to say to me?"
Lucy jumped slightly, wondering how much Erza had read. "…I-I do not know what you are talking about." She played innocently.
"Hmm? Nothing at all?" Erza spoke seductively.
Lucy gulped, looking at Erza as she took couple of steps backwards, not liking what might happen soon.
Erza stepped closer, eliminating any distance that Lucy had created. "Are you sure?" She asked, waving Lucy's journal in the air.
Lucy kept playing dumb. "No…I-I…what is that book anyway?"
Erza frowned slightly, before smirking. "Fine. Then how about you go on a date with me?"
Lucy literary shut down, internally screaming from embarrassment and deadly wanting her journal back, but Erza was not relenting.
Of course, Lucy would love to go on a date with Erza. But not on these conditions! Lucy also wanted to ask Erza out, not the other way around.
"Lucy?" Erza waved a hand in front of Lucy, seeing that the blonde had not responded yet.
Lucy blinked had backed away from her girlfriend in fear, fearful of what Erza had planned. "Only if you give me back my journal."
Erza smirked. "Nope. The date will be tomorrow. Be sure you are ready by then."
Erza then proceeded to walk out of Lucy's apartment with the journal in hand. Lucy stood in place, never been so afraid in her life.
"I am so dead." She mumbled, collapsing onto her bed without any second thoughts and slipped into a dreamless sleep.
~End of Flashback
…
Lucy sighed, sitting back up and looked around the guild, seeing if her girlfriend was here yet. So far, it's all peaceful and the redhead was nowhere in sight.
Lucy could make a will in case she died from Erza's plan, considering how perilous they could be. Or have Mira disguise herself as her…or just run away in general.
A tap was then felt on Lucy's shoulder, causing her to jump and shriek at the same time. Lucy turned with her heart ramming against her chest, when she sees her girlfriend standing there with her journal in hand.
"Ah…hi Erza…" Lucy nervously smiled, trying to hide the fact the Lucy was beyond afraid.
Unbeknownst to Erza's observation of Lucy's emotional state, the redhead smiled. "Ready?"
Lucy reluctantly nodded and stood up from the stool and allowed her girlfriend to take her arm and guide her out of the guild.
"So, Erza. Can you give me back my journal?" Lucy asked…pleaded with her life.
"No. We will be following exactly what's written in this book." Erza said, keeping the journal out of reach.
"Journal." Lucy corrected her. "We really don't have to follow what's written in that journal."
Erza ignored her and kept walking. Lucy silently groaned and walked in step with Erza so she wouldn't be dragged all the way to where her girlfriend was planning on taking her to.
Couple of minutes later, Erza slowed and stopped at the entrance of a park and looked at the journal. Lucy was so tempted to go and grab the journal from Erza. But she was more afraid of her wrath.
"First off… 'Hugging while watching the sunset.'" Erza recited from the journal.
Lucy facepalmed. "Erza…that…it's still noon. Please read the date plan from the beginning." She murmured with a bright red face.
Erza turned and read the date plan from the beginning with observant eyes, and remained mute for a moment, before clearing her throat. "I apologize. Let's start that again. First off… 'Holding hands while walking through the park.'"
Erza recited, grabbing her Lucy's hand and squeezing it gently.
Lucy blushed and tried to release their hands. "But…this…I-I…I mean…"
Erza leaned in and faced Lucy directly. "This journal is absolute. We will follow what's in this journal." Erza spoke with such authority that had left no room for arguments.
Lucy sweated bullets and forcibly nodding. "Yes. You are correct."
Erza smiled with content and tugged Lucy with her as they started walking through the park in silence.
Lucy was nervous and scared, but happy and excited at the same time. Although things did not go as she planned it to go, she still went on a date with Erza, and spend some more time with her. But she was also afraid of what Erza will do during the date, especially if she was directly following the date plan from Lucy's journal.
Walking through the park was content and peaceful so far, much to Lucy's content. So everything's was good so far.
The beautiful trees and flowers, and the sun in the sky. It was a beautiful day.
Then Lucy realized something as she looked around. "Erza? Why is no one around?"
"Because that's what the journal said." Erza said, like it was the most obvious thing ever.
Lucy sweatdropped, vividly remembering how she would like to spend her time with Erza in the park alone, with no one else present. And she also wondered how Erza managed to keep everyone out of the park.
"Let's sit."
Lucy snapped out of her deep reverie and turned to Erza who was looking at her with a smile.
"Huh?"
"The journal said to sit and enjoy nature." Erza spoke, sitting down on a bench nearby, gesturing Lucy to sit next to her.
Lucy eagerly sat next to Erza, thinking that this wasn't so bad and leaned on her for comfort. She wrapped her arm around Erza's arm and pleasantly enjoyed the touch.
They kept silent. The only thing Lucy could hear was her own heart beating against her chest. She wondered how Erza was feeling at the moment.
She sat up and looked at Erza, who had a soft and small smile as she looked at the trees in front of her. "Erza?"
Erza turned to face Lucy. "Yes?"
"How…are you feeling today?" Lucy asked.
Erza smiled and wrapped her arms around Lucy and tugged her onto her lap and squeezed her. "The happiest."
Lucy blushed, also remembering how she wanted to be on Erza's lap. Erza was really following that damn journal! Why did she write it in the first place anyway!?
Because Lucy was so hopelessly in love with Erza. Lately, she had some…thoughts that would make Mira squeal with delight. So writing it in a journal was the only think she could think of. But for it to backfire on her and the object of her affection finding it…was disastrous.
Erza looked at the journal from the side and read the next plan. "Next is 'Lunch in a café.'"
Lucy groaned, thinking how Erza had ruined the perfect moment. "Erza, can't we just stay here?"
"No. This journal said to the café after the walk in the park. So that's what we will do." Erza said with a stern voice, in which Lucy had no choice but to give in and allow Erza to take her to the café for lunch.
…
After a quick walk to the café and situating themselves at a table, Lucy was already exhausted. She was so nervous and restless with Erza being so touchy with her, especially in public. She couldn't remember if it was because of what she wrote in that journal…but she couldn't even remember what exactly, so it made Lucy restless.
She couldn't help but think how this date was too forceful and did not seem like a date all. Plus she wondered why Erza kept a straight and calm look throughout this 'date'.
Then a waitress came over with her notebook and smiled at the girls and face Lucy. "Are you ready to order?"
Lucy frowned for a moment and looked at the menu that she yet to look through. Not wanting to keep the lady waiting, she pointed at a random plate. "I'll take this."
"…Then I'll have that as well." Erza cut in.
"All right then." The waitress smiled and walked away with their orders.
Lucy could vividly remember writing something like that in her journal, about ordering the same thing as Erza.
"Erza." Lucy said, gaining the attention of the redhead. "Don't mind the journal. You're free to do whatever you like."
Erza was silent for a moment, staring at Lucy, reconsidering what she had said. "I'm fine with this."
Lucy hummed affirmation and confusion. She wondered if Erza did want the plate or was just forcing things. If Erza says it's okay, then it should be okay, Lucy hoped.
…
After lunch, Erza and Lucy walked through the streets of Magnolia in silence, with Erza's nose in that journal, and Lucy being annoyed because of Erza' behavior.
Lucy looked at the shops that they pass by and eyed a bookstore. There were some posters on the window, featuring a new book that Lucy had been waiting for ages.
Lucy could barely contain her eagerness. "Erza! Let's go in there!" Lucy tugged Erza into the bookstore, and was already at a shelf, looking for that particular book.
Erza kept her distance, watching Lucy going from shelf to shelf looking for a book. She opted to look through the journal to find another good place to hang out.
As Lucy looked through the shelf, she found a particular...book that she would never read. But, according to Levy, Erza tends to read naughty books…so maybe…
Lucy decided. She take the book, Ninjas of Love, and buy it for Erza. She would be happy with the book.
Holding the book in her hand, she resumed her search for that book she had been waiting for…but to come dry. She couldn't find it…at all. She opted to ask the clerk about it.
Much to her dismay, the clerk had said that they were out of stock and won't be another few weeks for another stock to come in.
Defeated, Lucy decided to pay for the book for Erza and keep it hidden as a gift for her later.
Walking back to where Erza was still rooted in place, Lucy hugged her girlfriend. "Hello."
"Hi." Erza replied, still having her nose in the journal.
Lucy pouted, clearly wanting some attention from the girlfriend. "Erza!"
"Hmm? I'm sorry. I didn't hear what you said." Erza muttered, still looking at the journal. "Next is… 'Looking at the sunset together.'"
Lucy stared back as her girlfriend walked out of the store, still muttering something about dates. She was clearly agitated and dumbfounded. All Lucy wanted was some attention from Erza. So far, that journal has been the most interesting thing Erza had ever seen.
Our date…doesn't even feel like a date…at all. Lucy supposed with a saddened expression as she walked out of the guild to join her girlfriend.
…
Erza and Lucy were walking through the park again, and the sun was inches away from kissing the horizon. Erza was becoming engrossed in the journal, she had almost forgotten that she even on a date with her girlfriend. Lucy was becoming more lonely and sad as they made their way to a destination to which the journal had directed Erza to go.
"Erza…" Lucy muttered, getting the redhead's attention.
"Yes?" Erza mumbled, giving Lucy an indication that she was listening.
"Don't you have anything else you want to do?" Lucy fidgeted with her clothes, wanting to do anything else that was not written in that damn journal.
"No."
"…" Lucy clenched her fists. "Is the date fun?"
"Yes." Erza responded, still reading and walking to their destination.
Lucy clenched her jaws angrily. What the hell!? "Okay. I'm pissed off now."
Lucy ran toward Erza and forcibly grabbed the journal from Erza's hand and quickly threw it as far as she could. She was angry that she had even written a journal in the first place. She was angry because that journal was getting in the way of her and Erza's date. So far, this date had been anything but fun. And she wanted it to end.
After throwing the journal, she watched it land in a pond, but Lucy did not care. She didn't care anymore.
"Now that the nuisance is now…gone…" Lucy turned and trailed off when she sees Erza running after the book.
Why is that journal more important than me? Lucy dreaded as she followed Erza, who had walked into the middle of the pond to grab the journal.
"…Why are you so obsessed with that journal?" Lucy asked with tint of jealously over that damn journal, and hurtful sensitivity that welled up in her chest.
Erza takes the drenched journal and carefully dried it as the best she could before facing Lucy. "This…"
"Huh?"
"Without this, I'm lost!" Erza declared, not a dab of embarrassment painted on her face. She was being truthful, and Lucy knew it.
Lucy was silent for a moment, and couldn't hold back her laughter. She was relieved and stupid at the same time.
Erza stared at Lucy with a confusingly look on her face as she watched her girlfriend laugh, which was the last thing she expected. Soon, she was blushing when Lucy wouldn't stop laughing.
"This date is over. Let's head home." Erza said, thinking that Lucy was laughing at her because she was pathetic enough to follow the date plan that Lucy had wrote.
Before Erza could even turn, she was tackled to the ground by Lucy, who had a huge grin on her face.
"You know, Erza? You really scared me during our date. But, there is one thing that we did not do yet." Lucy grinned while hovering a stunned redhead.
Erza blinked, not sure what she meant. She hadn't read that far into the journal, so she was confused.
Without saying anything, Lucy lowered herself and kissed Erza fully on the lips.
A/N: Yeah...my hands slipped, and wrote this little one-shot.
I love citrus and wished that the author or illustrator would publish them faster!
Anyway, if you loved this little story, ten favorite and follow an review. There is a chance that I might do a little smut for the next chapter...or have the next chapter centered around Erza during the awkward date. IDK. You tell me.
Don't forget to follow and favorite, and tell me of your opinions in the review box.
And FVI, I have a beta profile now, so if ya'll need any of your stories to be betaread, I am more than happy to do so. Just...no Nalu or Jerza. Other people can do that.
Review, as I had already said, every thoughts and opinions counts! I don't bite! (3.3)/
Toodles!~