Prologue

I know this sounds cliché but the summer before college felt magical. I thought I would be with Edward forever.

He was planning on heading to Dartmouth to major in pre-med, and I wanted to stay closer to Forks, my home since junior year of high school. Though I desperately longed to follow Edward, I knew I couldn't afford to go to school on the other side of the country on my dad's small town police chief salary, and what little money I had earned working my measly job. I needed to look after Charlie, too. I had just found him and I didn't want to leave him all alone yet.

So I would study writing at a local college and Edward would return whenever he possibly could. We had been drawn to each other immediately, since the first second we met. His green eyes, his amazing smile, his intelligence, his creativity. I loved, and still love everything about him. He seemed mysterious, like an old soul, someone who didn't quite fit in as the standard twenty-first century high school boy. This was largely due to his high-class upbringing. His father, Carlisle, a doctor, had brought his family all around the world, volunteering to treat those who were not fortunate enough to inherit a large sum of money. His mother, Esme, a former interior designer, gave up her business to travel with her husband and their children. They finally settled in Forks, so that their children could have the traditional high school experience.

Edward's family wanted him to have the best education, and go into medicine like his father. He knew he wanted to help people and we both knew he was smart enough to become a doctor. I noticed that his interests leaned more toward artistic endeavors. He loved to compose music and played the piano most nights. He told me he had taught himself to play one summer at his uncle's London mansion. He had begged his mother and father to buy a baby grand for his bedroom once they settled somewhere. I remember sitting on his bed, mesmerized by the way his fingers glided over the keys. Such sweet romantic melodies flowed out through his fingertips and into my soul. I told him he should continue to nurture his gift and apply to a music school.

"I can't picture you anywhere else but in front in of that piano, Edward."

He turned away from the piano for a moment. "I can think of a few other places," he sauntered over to me with a smirk playing across his lips. In an instant I was flat on my back while he hovered above me. "Like here," he added, his breath on my face.

"You're distracting me," I whispered, his heady scent of fresh cotton and pine assaulting my senses.

"So my plan is working."

"What I mean is," I exhaled heavily and attempted to gather my jumbled thoughts together, "why don't you apply to Berkeley, pursue your music?"

"Bella, it's just a hobby. My father succeeded in medicine, I'll carry on the tradition."

"But music, it runs through your veins. It's part of your soul. You're just doing this doctor thing because you think that's what your family wants."

"My father will disown me if I follow that path. Music won't pay our bills, baby."

"No, he would not," I tried to answer with indignation but the aroma that was distinctly Edward was making my whole body quiver. The slow burn of lust took control of my thoughts again. "I'm…sure he'd be happy with whatever life you choose to create for yourself. Wait, you just said our."

"Well, once we both finish college, I want us to live together."

"Why not do it after we graduate high school? I want to be with you now."

"You already have me. That won't change." He leaned into me as his lips brushed the curve of my neck. "Remember, you want to stay close, for Charlie's sake."

"Ummm, please don't mention my father when…"

"You want me to shelve this conversation for later?" he asked while he planted kisses along the side of my neck and worked toward my earlobe.

"Please," I breathed. "I need you, now."

"You don't need to beg me, Bella. You never have to do that."

My fingers tangled in his bronzy hair and I bucked my hips into his groin. His lips traveled the edge of my jaw.

My fingers wandered to the nape of his neck. "Don't, don't take your time," I somehow managed to utter. "Just kiss me."

"I thought I was already doing that," he paused to respond, his lips so close I could almost taste them.

"Edward…"

"Okay, okay. What the lady wants, the lady gets." I dug my short nails into his shoulder blades as our lips met. My tongue plunged into the heat of his mouth.

He pulled his face away and his glorious fingers toyed with the hem of my shirt. "May I, Miss Swan?"

"Always, please," I answered. Every time those fingers touched me, the delicate skin of my torso felt like it was on fire.

"Quite demanding, are we now?"

"I said please. Take my clothes off now! Is that demanding enough for you?"

"Ooh. I love it when your feisty side comes out," he winked.

He suddenly stilled, seemingly overcome by the moment.

I looked up at him, his eyebrows knitted and his forehead creased. "Are you okay?" I asked soothingly.

He rubbed the material of my blouse between his thumbs. "Bella, are you sure?"

I placed one hand atop one of his and stared straight into his brilliant emerald eyes. "Edward, I've never been as sure of anything in my life. I trust you, with everything I am. You already have my heart. I want you to have my body too."

"I am honored to be your first, Bella Swan, and hopefully your last as well."

"I love you, Edward."

The beautiful boy in front of me slowly pulled my shirt over my head, examining the newly exposed skin of my stomach. He nudged my legs open and knelt in between them reverentially. When he kissed my tummy, I began to giggle.

"Why are you laughing at me, Bella?" he inquired with a confused expression.

"Sorry," I answered, my stomach still contracting through my fit of laughter. "I'm just…ticklish there."

"That's good to know. I'll store it away for future reference. Now, back to business," he smirked, the pads of his thumbs skimming my sides and resting at the bottom of my bra. He circled my still-covered nipple, which elicited a moan from my lips. I involuntarily arched my back, wordlessly allowing him to remove the offending material from my breasts. He unclasped it and threw it, not really caring where it landed.

He took one nipple in his mouth and thumbed the other. His hand affectionately cradled the curve of my back. While his mouth switched over to the other breast, I felt the heat building between my legs. I wanted to feel more of his skin on mine. My fingers anxiously fumbled for the buttons of his shirt.

"Let me take care of it, Bella. Let me take care of you," he smiled sweetly.

I didn't understand how he could appear so calm and unaffected when I already felt beads of sweat along my forehead. His warmth left me as he pulled away enough to give me a full view of his chest. He worked slowly, agonizingly at removing his shirt. Once his shirt fully opened, I couldn't help but run my hands across his bare skin. I pushed the shirt off his shoulders and admired my Edward. My Edward.

He was lean, but not overtly muscular or athletic. He wasn't tan; rather he was pale and I liked him that way. Who could be tan here in Forks, considering the amount of sun our town received? I had seen his chest before; we had gone swimming on those rare warm summer days. But this was something different entirely. He offered himself to me, as completely as I did for him.

"C'mere," I found myself saying as I pulled him toward me. He brushed the hair out of my eyes and kissed my forehead, my nose, my cheeks, and finally my lips. I tried to push my tongue into his mouth as I had before, but this time he resisted. Instead, he kept it sweet and chaste, brushing my jaw softly with his fingertips. The feeling of his skin on mine overwhelmed me; his chest rose and fell with mine, as if we were already one. My hips arched off the bed, desperate to gain friction. I curled my fingers into his belt loops, inching his jeans down just a little. He ground into me as he kissed my neck. He felt hard and rough and thick beneath his clothing. I wanted to know how it felt without any barriers.

I thrust his zipper down and he didn't object. He reached between us to unbutton and wriggle out of his pants. He curved his thumb and index finger around the button of my jeans. I felt the zipper working downward. He began kissing one thigh, dangerously close to where I ached for us to be joined. His lips brushed along the length of my leg, stopping at my ankle joint. He softly kissed the other ankle and traced a path up my shin to the crook of my knee, all the way to my inner thigh.

I lost all coherent thought when he slid my panties down my legs. I seemed to lift off the bed just enough to assist him in his efforts.

"God, Bella," he breathed, "you're gorgeous."

This was the first time I can ever remember anyone calling me, Bella Swan, gorgeous. I had always been the painfully average girl, lucky to even be in this man's presence, let alone have him practically kneeling at my feet.

I pressed my thighs together instinctively, eager for his touch. He placed a hand on each of my knees to hold my legs apart. "Patience, my love," Edward whispered in a gruff, scratchy voice, akin to a sore throat but in a smooth, silky voice. "Relax." I stared into his verdant eyes and that seemed to ease me. I trusted him with everything I had.

His finger penetrated a place deep inside me. I started breathing heavily and whimpering at the sensation. "Oh, fuck," I screamed. I rarely cursed but I couldn't control myself.

I was at his mercy.

I could feel him pulling out of me as we made eye contact again. I silently conveyed to him with a slight frown that I needed more. His devious grin returned as his head dipped between my thighs. His tongue curled over my throbbing clit. I cried out as I felt his tongue hit that spot that he reached with his finger.

"You're so wet, dear. I think…"

"Edward," I interrupted.

"…you're ready," he finished. He cupped my ass and climbed above me so that every part of us touched. My fingers glided along the muscles of his back and stopped at the waist of his boxers.

"Let me take care of you," I repeated his sentiment while I peeled his underwear down his legs.

"Do you, are you…?" he stammered.

"I'm on the Pill. For a few weeks now."

"So you were planning this?" he questioned, his breath in my ear.

"No, I just thought it…might happen, you know? I love you and I want you."

His hand moved to grip my hips. "And I want you. I'm sorry if this hurts."

My fingers wound in his hair. I could feel the tip of him graze my entrance. Then, after a few shaky thrusts, I could feel him all around me. We built a steady rhythm; with every downward push he made, I bucked into him. I wanted this moment to last, for us to be together like this forever. But I began to shudder. The world turned black as pleasure and pain collided into sweet ecstasy. I clenched all around him and didn't want to let go.

He brushed strands of my hair, sticky with sweat, from my forehead as his release claimed him. His eyes squeezed shut and his face contorted into a beautiful grimace. He bit his lip and still stayed inside me as he rode it out. He collapsed on top of me, but I could barely feel his weight. I was still floating. His head fell onto my chest and he kissed the spot between my breasts.

"I can feel your heart beating," he panted. "It's fluttering so fast."

"You have that effect on me," I smiled down at him and stroked his jaw.

He pulled out and laid beside me, our legs still tangled together.

I turned to face him. He ran his fingers down my arm. "Edward, I'm not leaving."

"Good. I don't want you to. Just tell Charlie you had an impromptu sleepover with Alice. We'll get you a change of clothes in the morning."

"But," I whined, "I never want to leave this bed." I became lost in his eyes again. He gave me a quick peck on his lips, as if it were a practiced postcoital habit he had been doing for years. I wished that he would.

But I wouldn't get that wish.

When he left, everything changed.