One Hand in my Pocket

A/N: This is for an Anonymous Prompt on Tumblr. The original prompt was: Emma and Regina are dating for a few time now, and Emma decides that Regina needs to relax a little bit and gives her a little gift: a vibrator pantie. Now, Regina doesn't know it vibrates, she just thinks it's a ordinary lingerie. Emma asks her to wear it on a council meeting and, after some arguing, the she agrees. They're on the concil meeting and Emma has the remote control.

I've taken some liberties (I hope you won't mind, Anon!) but hopefully stayed true to the spirit of the prompt. It is sort-of a Swan Queen PWP. Warning for SQ Sexytimes.

Please read and review! Thank you!

The idea had come to Emma weeks ago in a moment of inspiration. Emma thought the situation through as her cheeks flushed with excitement and the first of the chilly fall air. She clutched the large hot chocolate with extra whipped cream as her face split into a mischievous grin recalling the circumstances that had led to "Operation Undercover Lover."

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She and Regina were tangled up on the couch after their magic lesson. Regina was flipping through her photos from college and Emma could not reach the remote. She had whined until Regina caved and flicked her wrist, turning on the TV to the Sundance Channel, which she knew Emma would watch for hours.

"How come we never covered that in any of our magic lessons?"

"Hmmm?" Regina didn't even look up from the album.

"Why can't I do the wrist turny on thing?"

"You certainly could, dear. But you must enchant the cable box first so that it will respond to your magic."

"Are you serious? Would I have to get up for all that?"

Regina chuckled, "Yes, dear. It's not unlike programming a new remote control. You have to calibrate the object to get it to respond."

"Fine, fine. But can you wrist-flicky thing to a different channel? I hate this movie."

Regina sighed and stood up, pulling Emma with her. She marched her over to the entertainment center and placed Emma's hand on top of it.

"Now close your eyes. Imagine the way that you would control the remote and think through the processes while imagining the outcome you desire."

"Ok, so like…come on, HBO."

"Picture a channel we subscribe to, dear."

"Right, ok."

"Now, change the channel." Regina bit her lip to stifle her laugh as Emma's face screwed up in intense concentration, her cheeks beginning to flush with the effort. After a moment, Friends appeared on the screen and Emma's eyes popped open wide.

"It worked!"

"Yes, dear. Now it will respond to your magic without physical touch. May I please go back to judging your haircut?"

Emma pulled her in for a quick kiss, chuckling. "My hair was not that bad."

"Bangs, Emma?" Regina looked at her skeptically and tugged on her hand to lead her back to the couch. "I could almost forgive the bangs if it weren't for the overalls."

"They were in!"

"I've never been more grateful to have been frozen in time."

"Hardy, har, har. Oh wait! This is the best part – they're going to do The Routine."

Regina shook her head and turned, leaning her back against Emma's side, who quickly wrapped an arm around her. Regina's attention returned to the album she had set aside as she turned the page to pictures of what looked to be a rather wild party. Emma was dancing and drinking what looked to be some sort of punch out of a red plastic cup. She turned the page again and saw Emma making a most unusual face. Looking more closely, she realized she had seen that face before in a very specific context that seemed out of place for the middle of a party.

"Emma?"

Emma was distracted for a moment laughing at the scene before she turned and said, "Yeah?"

"What is this a picture of?"

"Oh, that was a cast party for one of my girlfriend's plays in college."

"And what exactly are you doing?"

"In that picture?" She leaned in closer, "I don't know, it looks like I'm standing by the bar or something."

"Well, why does your face look like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like you're having a…moment of ecstasy."

"A moment of ecstasy? Really, Regina? You can't say orgasm?"

Regina flushed brightly. Despite having seduced many in her days as a queen, it was always done through coy wordplay and intimidation. She had learned as a girl that ladies didn't speak so frankly of private matters.

"Seriously," Emma continued, "You need to loosen up."

"That's neither here nor there, why are you making that face in the middle of a party standing up?"

"Well, I um…" Now Emma blushed, "If you had a hard time with orgasm, this is going to blow your mind." She chuckled nervously before taking a breath and saying, "My girlfriend at the time sort-of asked me to wear…special panties to that party."

Regina frowned. "I don't understand."

Emma grinned sheepishly and said, "They had a vibrator in them. A remote control vibrator."

Regina's eyes widened and her chin hung open. After a long pause, she shook her head and cleared her throat.

"And she held the remote, I take it?"

Emma nodded.

"I see."

Emma studied her for a moment before asking, "What are you thinking?"

"Do you -," Regina cleared her throat again. "Do you still have them?"

Emma chuckled and said, "No, that was the only time I ever wore those."

Regina looked her dead in the eye and husked "Pity," before standing and swaying toward the stairs. "Care to join me, Sheriff Swan?"

At one time the title would have brought an angry fire to the pit of Emma's stomach, but knowing as she did the only context in which Regina now called her that, the fire settled lower. She jumped off the couch and took the stairs two at a time behind Regina.

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Emma's smirk was nearly predatory as she calmly walked into the Town Council meeting nearly twenty-five minutes late. She knew that Regina would be extremely irritated. Whenever Emma was late to these things, Regina spent at least ten minutes of the meeting staring her down. Generally Emma desperately averted her eyes, trying to avoid the nonverbal confrontation her tardiness earned. Today, though, she continued to smirk as she met Regina's eye, who looked thrown off balance by the change, but recovered quickly and said, "Thank you for joining us, Miss Swan. Perhaps now we can continue learning about the important educational needs of our community."

Despite Regina's clear reprimand, Emma's grin grew as she realized she must have really gotten to the mayor if she was happy to bring Snow to the podium. Regina took her seat and shot Emma another death glare as Snow began to babble about the need for a new library within the school. Emma surprised Regina again by winking and nodding down at her cup.

As Regina watched, Emma reached out and lightly pressed her fingers to the cup, sliding them slowly back and forth. Regina felt as though Emma's fingers were stroking her thigh rather than the cup. Emma tried to cover her giggle with a cough as Regina shrieked and jumped up from her chair. Silence pervaded for several long minutes as people looked to Regina in shock. For her part, Regina was regaining her composure.

"Leroy, a mouse just scurried past. See to it, will you? Immediately." She flattened her skirt and resumed her seat. "Please continue."

Regina's face was stony as she turned to Emma who experienced a moment of panic. Perhaps this was not such a good idea. This could majorly backfire if she wasn't careful. Without realizing it, she had begun nervously drumming her fingers against the cup, tapping lightly. Across from her, Regina gasped softly and crossed her legs. Emma's eyes snapped up in time to catch sight of Regina's widening pupils, her lips pouting out slightly. A slow grin spread across her face again as she moved her fingers more deliberately to press lightly against the side of the cup. Regina gave a visible gulp but she was no longer glaring, so Emma took it as a sign that she could continue.

Holding Regina's eyes, Emma took the top off her drink revealing the mound of whipped cream. Lowering her gaze, Emma gave another wink and eyed the slight black outline of Regina's bra visible beneath her top before swirling her finger over the very tip of the whipped cream.

Regina's back arched automatically as she felt Emma's finger circling her nipple. She attempted to make it look like a stretch and rearranged her papers before pulling in closer to the table so she could clench her thighs together without appearing strange.

She closed her eyes momentarily before they popped back open to see Emma with the cup in hand, her tongue swirling where her finger had been a moment ago.

"Oh!" She had exclaimed it before she could stop herself. And damn if she didn't sound breathless. "I had no idea the need was so dire," she attempted to cover, "Third grade reading levels are down 20%? What is your plan?"

She gave Emma a look that was silently pleading, though whether to stop or continue was impossible to read. Emma stared back a moment before flicking her tongue experimentally into whipped cream again, this time picturing an entirely different body part. Regina bit her lip and heaved a sigh that Emma took as a sign to continue. She licked slowly and purposefully, flattening her tongue with one swipe and flicking the tip with the next. Regina's entire body was tense as she tried to control her trembling. When Emma plunged her finger into the whipped cream and stirred it with her finger a few times Regina's chest began to flush with the effort of containing her impending orgasm.

"And that is why I believe that I should be appointed as Superintendent of Schools - to begin to build the future of Storybrooke." Snow beamed brightly at the council.

"Yes!" Regina screamed suddenly as Emma pulled the finger she had plunged into her mouth out with a pop.

Every head in the room save one blonde snapped around at Regina's exclamation. She clutched the table desperately, breathing heavily. After a moment she said, "Well, after all, education is critical to the health of any town. And speaking of health, I may be ill." She pressed a hand to her very flushed forehead and said, "Will you excuse me? I think perhaps we should adjourn early. That will be all for today."

Muttering and giving each other bemused looks, the council members packed up their paperwork and left the board room. Emma remained with her head down, hoping her hair would block her shit-eating grin. When the room had emptied she heard the distinctive rhythm of Regina's heels as she walked over and locked the door before spinning Emma's chair to face her.

"And what exactly was that all about?"

"Well you seemed disappointed that I didn't have the vibrating panties so I figured I could calibrate something a little more…personal."

"You enchanted my panties?"

"And your bra." Emma bit her lip as she looked up at Regina.

"And you felt the best time to use that enchantment would be in a council meeting, while your mother was speaking about becoming the town's Superintendent of Schools."

Emma smirked, "The untouchable Mayor Mills coming undone before not only her constituency but her mortal enemy. It was irresistible. Besides, now you can see the fun of letting go a little."

Regina rolled her eyes and crossed her arms as she said, "I hope you know that I cannot condone that kind of unprofessional display to occur."

Emma sighed dramatically and said, "Well, that is a shame, Madame Mayor." She stood slowly and pulled Regina's arms around her neck. "There was one last part to the surprise."

Regina's arms tightened around Emma's neck as she leaned in until she was a breath away from her lips. "What's my surprise?"

Emma took Regina's hand in her own and kissed the palm before looking into the chocolate brown eyes she loved so much and saying, "I wore something special for you too."

She pushed their joined hands down to the bulge in her jeans and Regina moaned before backing up toward the board room table, pulling Emma with her and saying, "Technically, this still counts as the same act of malfeasance."

Emma smiled as she lifted Regina onto the table and shrugged, "You're the boss."