Dear, Mom and Dad,
I lost to this swordsman recently. I tried so hard, yet I failed...
I just need to try harder!
Love,
Daz Bones
Yeah, I totally jacked this letter's idea from Letters To An Absent Father, this Pokemon mini-comic by mareodomo.
"So I finished watching the Baby-Sitters Club movie," Mr. 1 was telling Miss Valentine over chocolate.
"So what did you think?" Miss Valentine asked.
"Disappointing, really. I was half-expecting Kristy to execute Karen and by decapitation for her insolence."
"Insulin? Stacey is the one with diabetes, not Karen."
"But Claudia dressed all nice. Like how I used to dress before Dad beat me with a belt while wearing a Goofy mask."
"You told me that before."
"Oh."
"Whatever happened to that tutu?"
Sir Crocodile entered the room, what was left of their destroyed headquarters.
He said, "The water has destroyed the halls, and by gators were chased away by seven ducks and a camel. I was defeated by a rubber man, and the police are coming. Any bright ideas on what we should do?"
"Uh, gather our reserves and use the other base?" Mr. 1 suggested sarcastically.
"What other base?"
"The one you built as a back-up because it would be rather easy for Revolutionaries and the World Government to topple us?"
"Oh...right."
"Who do we have left?" Miss Valentine asked.
"Ah, you, me, Mr. Whine over there, and Mr. 4 and Merry Christmas."
"And...?"
"And what? That's it! Everyone's been defeated by those meddling Strawhats."
"Even you?" Mr. 1 asked incredulously.
Crocodile pointed his hook at him and said, "You...shut up. Now, kiddies, let's go to our base and gather our thoughts."
"We're going to need money..."
Crocodile hook-slapped Mr. 1 across the face.
"I agree, Mr. 1," Crocodile said.