Title: Smile
Summery: Oneshot. This is set about a month after the end of the novel. Here's a look into the mindset of Sodapop Curtis. Surely, there must be something profound brewing behind that happy-go-lucky smile.
Disclaimer: The characters belong to the talented SE Hinton.
- - -
"Soda, what's wrong?" Steve asks as our shift at the DX ends.
Great. Steve to the rescue, though I guess I shouldn't be such a jerk, he is my best buddy after all. I give him a lopsided smile, "why would anything be wrong?
"You don't seem yourself, today."
I have to fight from rolling my eyes. I guess, everybody is used to the happy-go-lucky Sodapop Curtis, and that me in a bad mood would just be bizarre. Sometimes, I wonder how they really perceive me. I almost snap. The love of my life had gotten herself pregnant, the baby wasn't mine and two of my closest buddies are dead. I don't say this though. He'd probably take it to offence. Instead I knock my smile up a few notches and tell him I'm fine.
We drive home talking about football.
- - -
"You're pregnant!"
"Yes," Sandy sighs, she stares off into the distance with unseeing eyes.
My eyes widen, but although I'm surprised, I'm definitely not unhappy with this. I wanted to marry her and have a kid someday; I guess it's just sooner than later. I can deal with this, I think. This is great.
"You're having my baby," I whisper in awe. I reach down to touch her stomach, but she shifts and pushing my hand away.
"Not yours," she says slowly. "Or, so I think."
My mouth drops open in shock. I can feel my mind reeling from the blow. When the sentences and thoughts in my mind begin to un-jumble and make sense again, I speak.
"So, who's the father, then?"
"Is it really important?"
I sit down on a nearby bench and bury my face in my hands. Is it really important? Of course it's important. It's important to me, to him and it should be important to you.
"Does he know?"
"Yeah, he knows, but he doesn't care."
"So, forget him." I say, standing up. "I'll take care of you and the baby. I love you. Marry me."
"Soda… I - I don't -"
"Please," I say, knowing I'm starting to sound desperate. "I don't care whose baby it is. I love you, and I want to make this work."
"I don't know…"
"Why not? Don't you love me?"
She looks up at me, and I know the answer even before she whispers it. We're both crying now.
"I'm going to go live with my grandmother."
"But, doesn't she live in Florida?"
She nods. "I'm sorry," she whispers walking away.
"I'll write to you," I call after her.
- - -
And I did. I was stupid enough to think she still wanted me, and maybe it could work out. Of course, it wasn't long till the letter arrived back, unopened. The next day, I snapped after being caught between Ponyboy and Darry's fights. We worked our differences out, but there was still a dark lingering feeling. Not long after was Dally and Johnny's funeral. It was us – the gang – Dally's old man and funnily enough, Tim Shepard. Nobody else.
We drive up the street and climb out of the car. Steve walks ahead of me and gets in the house first, I hear laughing and I know Two-Bit's home. Slowly, I lag myself up the stairs and to the front door. I pause and stare through the windowed door. Steve has got Two-Bit in a headlock, yet they're both laughing. Ponyboy and Darry are absorbed in a conversation, a book in front of them. Both look happy. Two-Bit spots me standing at the door, and waves manically.
Suddenly, in so long I actually feel good. The dark mood in the pit of my stomach seems to fade away, and for the first time in ages, I give an authentic smile. Things can only get better from now on.
- - -