"Don't do this Gail!"

"Don't do what Holly." Gail started to pace around the locker room trying to understand what was actually happening.

"This." Holly moved her right hand back and forth between herself and Gail trying to make Gail understand.

"I am not doing anything. You are moving away Holly, you are leaving me just like every…" She stopped and kicked the wooden bench that Holly was sat on. "..one fucking leaves me. I actually thought we could be something Hols."

"We are something." Holly stood and grabbed Gail's shoulders. "Look at me please." She placed her index finger under Gail's chin and moved it up so that Gail's eyes were on her. "Please Gail. I don't want this to be the end of us, I don't want this to stop us from being together. I know it's going to be hard for a little while but this will work out I promise."

Gail was trying to look at anything but the woman she loved who was stood right in front of her. She could feel the tears starting to form but she couldn't bring herself to let them fall, not now, she couldn't show her weakness.

"Please Gail, I love you. You do know that don't you."

"You have a fucked up way of showing me." Gail pushed herself from Holly's grip and started to pace again.

"I can't talk to you while you are like this." Holly picked up her bag from the bench. "I was going to stand here and ask you to still be with me, I just told you I love you and you couldn't care less." She threw her bag over her shoulder and started walking towards the door. "When you have grown up Gail let me know, because right now you are acting like a spoilt little child." She exited the locker room and wiped away the tears that were falling down her cheeks.

"Have fun in San Francisco!" Gail shouted after Holly. She sat down on the bench where Holly had just been seated. That is when she gave in to the pain that she felt in her heart. "You are a fucking moron Peck."

Six months later

It had been six months since Holly had left for San Francisco, and she still didn't feel like she was home.

The pain of losing Gail seemed to only get worse with time, but she just found better ways of hiding it from everyone else.

She hadn't spoken to the blonde since the night in the locker room at 15, and she regretted leaving her like she did. How was she supposed to talk to someone who wouldn't listen to her, that was always their problem.

Tonight her team were going out for a few drinks, a celebration for the hard work that they had been doing over the past few months. They had worked long hours and none of them had any social life to speak of recently, not that Holly minded, it took her mind of everything that was hurting in her heart.

"You were only together for a heartbeat Holly, why are you making this a bigger deal than it is." She muttered to herself.

It was at that moment that her Assistant, Jake, decided to knock on her open office door.

"You okay there Doctor Stewart?" He asked. He had become a friend over the past few months, it was nice to have someone to talk to while working your butt off to hit deadlines.

"Yeah I'm fine, sorry." Holly waved her hand in front of herself to dismiss the comment she had said. "And how many more times, its Holly, please."

"Please, people will start talking if I call you that." He raised his eyebrow and smirked. Jake was a lovely young man, straight out of college, he worked hard and played even harder. He told Holly stories about his little adventures and she saw a lot of her younger brother in him. Except he was clearly gay, which was something he had in common with herself rather than her brother.

"You would be so lucky." She smiled back at him. They both knew about each other's love for the same sex, but it was still fun to have a little banter between them.

"You are coming out tonight?" Jake enquired as he stepped more into Holly's office and started looking at her bookshelf. He had borrowed a few of them, and Holly liked how interested he was in the field that they both worked in.

"Yeah I think so, I may not stay out that long though." Holly continued to type an email out that she had got distracted from.

"We will see about that." Jake slammed a book shut that he had been looking at and turned to Holly. "I'll pick you up at 7pm, sharp. We can split the fare."

"Sounds good to me. See you later." Holly looked up to him and smiled.

"See you later Doctor Stewart." Jake said as he exited her office giving her a wicked grin.

True to his word, Jake arrived at 7pm sharp and they both headed to the bar that they were meeting all of their co-workers at. It wasn't as dark and 'emo' looking at The Penny which she had grown to love, but it was similar.

They navigated themselves to the rest of the team that were sat at the back of them bar and after a few drinks Holly started to relax a little. The tension she had felt for the past few month started to become numb and she didn't mind that for one night.

"I like this Holly." Jake laughed as they downed another shot of some sort of vodka mix.

"That's Doctor Stewart to you." They both laughed and Holly nudged him with her shoulder.

The rest of the team were talking between themselves, but Holly had spoken to most of them throughout the night.

"So how is the dating going?" Holly asked Jake, she knew he had been seeing someone for a little while now as he had mentioned him through passing comments.

"Yeah it's good." Jake took a sip of beer that another co-worker had just put in front of himself and Holly. "I don't know if I'm too young for something serious to happen though. You know…" He sighed at looked at Holly. "What about you?"

Holly sipped at her beer, wondering how long she could pretend that she hadn't heard his question.

"Come on Holly, we are friends right, we tell each other stuff." Jake nudged her almost spilling her beer.

Holly couldn't help but remember the last time someone had said that to her, the blonde hair, the piercing blue eyes that still appeared in her dreams.

"Umm…" Holly cleared her throat. "I'm not seeing anyone, I…" She was stalling, she knew she was. "I don't have enough time to concrete on someone else just yet." She played with the label on her beer bottle, trying to distract herself from the voice inside her head that was so familiar.

Jake looked at her with such sympathy when she looked up to meet his gaze. "She really did a number on you didn't she." It wasn't a question, more like a statement.

Holly nodded and took another sip of her drink. Jake patted her leg and got up to leave the table.

"Come on…" He offered her his hand. "We are going to dance."

She looked at him and smiled, placing her bottle on the table and reaching out for his hand.

Her memories started to fade again and her and Jake danced the night away, in the small bar, to old songs they both knew but made up most of the lyrics to.

They finally left the bar just after last orders and stumbled into a cab. Jake made sure the cab driver dropped Holly off first, and he even got out the cab to see her to the main door of her apartment block.

"Thank you for tonight Jake, we will have to do this again sometime." She smiled at him as she tried to locate her key in her bag.

"Definitely, and remember Hols, you aren't alone here." He smiled and leaned in to give her a hug. "See you Monday." He waved goodbye and jumped back into the cab.

Having found her key, Holly unlocked the main door and climbed the stairs to her apartment on the 3rd floor.

After living in a town house, she was still coming to terms with the many stairs and other people living in such a small radius to herself.

She managed to enter her apartment and hook the keys onto the rack near the door, after locking it.

Walking into the kitchen she grabbed a print glass and filled it with water and down the whole lot and refilled it again then started moving to her bedroom through the dark living room.

After getting ready for bed, she grabbed painkillers out of the cabinet in her bathroom ready for the morning and fell into the king size bed and tucked herself in.

She rolled over to face the side of the bed that was empty, stroking her fingers over the pillow that laid there.

She felt the tears rolling before she realized she was crying.

"I miss you." Was all she could remember saying before sleep took hold of her.