A/N: Hi...
So after a long absence I know this is not SMFH...I have ten chapters of it collecting dust in my room and this is the first thing I'm uploading? Why? Because my computer sucked mako balls and I had to reupload it.
I'm doing a final fantasy story in the meantime, and this one is already typed out; one of my older fics, about halfway through. I read through as hard as I can but lease excuse any typo I misht have overlooked.
I love you guys, and this is my coming home gift to ffnet~
THIS IS A CELESXLOCKE AU THAT MIGHT TURN CELESXSETZER...depends on what I'm feeling. The only alternate thing in this is that Rachel is alive. Everything else is canon.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of ff6...stop asking meh squeenix!
Chapter 1: In The End, We Stand Alone.
She is called, 'The Ice Queen'.
Known to even rival the Goddess Shiva's coldness. Known to show no mercy among enemies and even friends. She led fearless armies of a thousand men and harnessed the power of ice as if her excellent swordsmanship was not enough.
Yet her heart felt empty, torn. Torn between sworn duty and her humanity. Her conscience weighing heavily as the screams of innocent lives permeated the air, their calls for salvation like a deafening symphony of agony, howling over the fiery winds as Maranda burned into ashes.
She had the power to save them all, yet she chose to stand by and watch.
-
Cold sweat ran down her body as she sat up, peeling her sweaty back from her bedsheet. She shivered as she let her blanket fall down to her waist, exposing her naked skin to the midnight air. There was a time when she did not feel cold at all; when her body was so attuned to ice that it genuinely disregarded any sensation that came from it. That time was long gone, the world is different now. There was no more magic, no more Espers, no more war.
No more Kefka.
"Celes?" A timid voice came from the other side of the door, pulling her out of her musings. She hastily donned the silk robe resting on a chair beside her bed, securing is around her shaking body. She ran a hand through her hair, moistening her chapped lips and tried to compose herself before she called the girl in, hoping against hope that she had everything under control.
But she knew Terra could see through it all.
"You had that dream again, hadn't you?" Terra asked, moving to sit on the chair next to Celes' bed, her face full of worry, "It was a long time ago, you didn't have the power to go against them."
"you know as much as I do that I had those powers, more than now." Came the blonde's quiet reply, her knuckles turning white as she clenched them against her sheets, preventing them from shaking, "I had the power to refuse. I had the power to quench the flames. I killed them all." She whispered, the images from her vivid dream leaving her in a mess. There was a bigger void in her soul after each nightmare, and it was slowly filling with thorns, the numb pain a living hell within every, waking hour. She is a Returner, yet she couldn't erase her misdeeds and they gnawed at what was left of her. She had thought that saving the world from absolute ruin with her friends will put everything to rest. But she found no redemption for the innocent lives lost under her hand.
Terra was about to speak but a shaking hand was raised to stop her. The pain in Celes' eyes was much too unbearable for the young, half-Esper, but she was at a loss on what to do. The ex-General is her friend yet she knew more than anyone, that she was the last person who could understand the pain she went through. Terra was, in a sense, unconscious during her service to the Empire, but Celes had pure control over her actions. She was raised as a pure-blooded Imperial and believed her actions to be right. Terra couldn't begin to imagine what it was like to-
"Enough." Celes whispered, the hand shakingly pushing strands of golden hair away from her pale face, the moonlight from her window making her look like a ghost more than anything else, "Why are you here, Terra? Was there something you needed?" She knew Terra secretly ventured to her chambers every night upon her arrival in Figaro, checking if she was alright and the lack of sleep showed on her face. It sickened her to think that Terra suffered with her, and she is having none of it. She wants to face her demons alone, but at the same time, grateful for the love from her friends. She frowned at the thought and closed her eyes; they have done enough and they deserve the peaceful life they fought for. She is just anothet thorn among the roses.
"Creeping around at night wouldn't help your complexion one bit. Edgar might leave you before you even say 'I do'" She said, ending with a rare smile. Terra blushed beet-red looked away in embarrassment, eliciting a small giggle from the usually stoic, girl. The atmosphere returned to that of light jest as the two girls talked for sometime, calming Celes' nerves. It was during these moments that Celes allowed her repressed childhood surface, only during closed walls, only with Terra.
"Come, you must get some rest for tomorrow. Your first day as wife and Queen must always be remembered along with your radiance and beauty. Edgar and the others might kill me if they knew I made you stay all night."
"You know I won't allow that to happen, Celes. And speak for yourself; you look like you can use the sleep more than me." Terra answered, her lips curving into a smile as the blonde got to her feet, knowing that any argument against Celes accompanying her back to her chambers would be futile and so she walked with her, opening the door and crossing the small, patch of desert that separated the guest chambers from the castle proper, "I rarely see you out so long during the day, nor at dinners. When I become Queen, I wouldn't see you unless we had a break from the rebuilt or if you drop kn from whichever town you're staying at. Are you sure you don't want to live here? We have plenty of room, oh, or in Narshe, since it's much nearer." Terra started, and Celes practically droned out her reply simply because of how many times they had the conversation.
"I'm fine Terra, no need to worry." She felt guilty about lying to her, but Celes knew that if she said otherwise, Terra would force her to stay in Figaro. Celes would not, of course, but it would break Terra's heart, and she cannot allow that; her friend had lost too much.
But it hurt her more to see the happiness that surrounded Terra; the peace that she envied and she knew that if she stayed, she would only be consumed by pain. Pain would only spawn envy, envy to hate, hate to ruin, and thus the cycle goes on. It was why Celes opted to live far from them, still in contact but far enough to start anew. Far enough to face her own demons.
"I'm nervous." Terra mumbled, their steps echoing around the castle's antechamber, empty except for the guards that stood at every doorway. Celes grinned, wrapping the robe around herself more tightly as they passed a particularly large window, "I'd be nervous too if I were you. Edgar does have a sort of reputation after all"
"Oh shush." Terra hissed, although returning Celes' grin, "I think he outgrew that already. I didn't think he would ask me for marriage if he wasn't serious enough."
"Of course." A soft, pang of envy shot through the former General's being but she knew it was only just. It was foolish to even think about it but she wondered what would have happened if she had traded lives with Rachel. One thing is for sure, she might not have been here now. It was painful, but Celes knew that when it came to it, she wouldn't trade the life she led for hers. Demons aside, it was her friends who taught her how to live, to love, to laugh and cry, and everything else in between. They made the thorns hurt less and it was through them she gained the will to survive. Locke would never be hers, that she came to accept, but he will forever be a part of her life. In a special place devoid of thorns.
"See you in the morning." Terra said, pulling Celes into a hug. She stiffened, still not used to such gestures, before she returned it in kind, letting go after a short while. She waited until Terra closed the door and the creaking of her bed ceased before she turned the other way, retracing her steps. She stopped at a junction, looking left towards the throne room and, against better judgement, decided to pay the topmost tower a visit. The guards did not question why a barefoot, robe-clad, Celes Chere climbed the tower at this time of night, her face obviously gaunt. She was unaware of their looks as she disappeared atop the trapdoor, the chilly, desert breeze meeting her, playing with the golden strands of her hair. She placed a hand on the turret's brick wall, looking beyond the endless sea of sand, towards the mountains that lined the horizon, and to where the peaks touched the star-riddled sky. Celes closed her eyes, letting herself have a taste of Terra's peace.
"Isn't it a bit too late for a midnight stroll? It's almost dawn." A familiar voice reached her ears and a warm, wool cloak enveloped her shoulders before she could even turn around. Grey eyes met blue as the man smiled over her, his hand lingering on her arm before falling back on his side, a glint of obsidian seen on one of his fingers.
"Pretty early for a morning's walk, and frankly, odd even for you, Setzer." She returned, a ghost of a smile on her lips as she gratefully wrapped the coat around herself. She vaguely wondered how she missed the Falcon when she walked from her chambers to the castle earlier but her thoughts quickly went on their own track. Setzer is here only to transport their friends from other parts of the world. If she remembered correctly it would include Gau, Cyan, Relm and old Strago, maybe Gogo was with them but it means that they will also be with-
"I know what you're thinking. He's not here yet, but he will be tomorrow, with her." The deep voice that usually calmed her seemed hard like spoken through gritted teeth, Celes couldn't help but frown. Setzer sighed, putting his hands up in defeat before cupping her face with one, his thumb caressing her soft cheek, reaching beside her to catch a blowing lock of her golden hair, "My offer still stands, Celes."
"My answer is still the same, Setzer, I just can't." Her voice was mellow, defeated, and he felt anger. In spite of her elemental affinity, Celes had always been a fiery, young woman. Like spitfire, she was cunning, beautiful; a no-nonsense kind of girl. Yet the shell of a woman standing in front of him is a stranger. He knew about the nightmares, Terra was kind enough to tell him, and it hurt that even now, Celes didn't trust him enough to even confide. She always stayed closed, and he knew he was fighting a losing fight, but he just couldn't stop. He is gambling using his heart even if he knew she would shatter it to pieces.
But he would sacrifice everything just to see those sapphire orbs burn again.
"I know. Could you blame me for trying?" He chuckled, but it was empty. He once thought that winning the war and sailing the skies freely with Daryl's memories was enough to keep him happy, that to fulfill his dreams about the Falcon would be enough. But now, he knew there is still something missing. She was still missing. But she will never be his.
Still, he gambled.
"I guess," Withered words left withered lips, and it was all she could give to the man who gave her so much. She turned her back on him and gazed into the direction of the rising sun, watching as the sky turned from bluish black to light pink. Setzer stood behind her silently, watching the breeze play with her golden hair, sending an assault of rose scent for him to smell. He clenched his fists, fighting the urge to just grab her and take her away, far away to somewhere she could stop breaking. The momen he caught her when she tried to reach that bandanna, he knew that among all of them, Celes would have the hardest time coping. She would be the only one torn beyond repair. The frail stranger before him is enough proof.
Setzer closed his eyes. He raised his hands and lightly gripped her shoulders, feeling her flinch, yet she did not say anything. He took one step forward, hating the lack of resistance from her, his chest against her shoulders. He wrapped his arms around her, tightly yet gently, burying his nose in her hair, a soft kiss left on her head. Celes closed her eyes and she trembled, putting a shaking hand on top of his, watching the rising of the sun with the falling of her tears.
"Thank you, Setzer." Her voice is surprisingly steady against the siege of emotions inside her. It was all she could say without being overwhelmed. Setzer was always the calm before the storm.
