Genre: Romance
Title: She
A one shot about Ayuzawa Misaki and Usui Takumi
This is for you.
AU
I do not own Kaichou-wa Maid-sama!
—
My dearest,
This is the day that I have longed for someone to finally own me. This is the time were all my dreams will all be fulfilled. This time has finally come. The time were you and I will finally have each other. The time were I would finally own you and you will have me. The time were you will realize that there was no longer a "me" but "us".
This is our time.
A time only dedicated for the two of us. A time were we are the center of the world. Were you would look at me with those dashing eyes of yours as if I'm the only person you're seeing and as if I'm the only person that matters.
Our time.
But I'm sorry, my love, for this time I'm talking about would never happen. I have to leave for my heart needs to sort out a few things. I never deserve you since you are too considerate of me and I don't want to abuse your kindness.
But in return, I will always remember you and I will never forget the times I have shared with you. I don't have the right to tell you that I wish for your happiness because I was the one to shatter your dreams with me for our future.
So, this is all I could say.
Goodbye, my love.
Goodbye.
May you live a happy life with the people around you.
I love you.
—
Misaki sighed upon reading the letter of the main protagonist of the story she was reading. Now how will she be able to explain this when it was not stated what the girl—or the boy?—was talking about. What kind of time was that? And firstly, what kind of writer would write such poetry without further describing the scenario on his story? Sure it was stated that it was the girl's most awaited time but really, why would she give up the time she was waiting for for like forever just for that stupid "sort out" thing?
My heart needs to sort out a few things.
So what? She could have sort that thing out and at the same time, fulfill her dreams, very easy, right?
She tried reading the poetry again only to get nothing and she was getting impatient. Ten minutes more and the teacher would ask them to finally read their reactions on the letter from an anonymous writer.
No wonder she dislikes English. Everything tends to get cheesy and melodramatic and that's what she hates the most. She was raised as a very tough person because her mother and sister depend on her. They need her strength and determination to survive the tempests of life.
Seven minutes left.
"Misaki, don't you think that this literary piece is heartwarming?" her best friend, Hanazono Sakura, said to her when their English teacher isn't looking their way. "It's sad that she has to leave him after realizing that it wasn't yet their time to be together."
Misaki smiled at her and focused her eyes on the literary piece in front of her. "Is that what you think? I kind of think that I don't understand the meaning behind this letter. All I know is that the lady here is bidding farewell."
Sakura frowned at her. "How come you didn't get it? It was clearly stated that she run away from her own wedding after learning that she wouldn't be happy with him because there are things for her to still finish."
"Uh—what?"
From her left, Shizuko cut in. "Misaki doesn't have any experience about relationships that's why she wasn't in to the letter."
Casually, Misaki shrugged and went back to reading again her letter. She glanced at the clean sheet of paper in front of her and re-read the letter again. And once again, she understood nothing.
Her reaction was merely nothing. Because all in all, she doesn't have any idea on what she was reading at all.
She loves him, period. But she has to do something else, period. What else should she say? Aside from writing her reactions to the letter, what else should she add since the teacher also instructed them to complete the letter since for the teacher herself, she thinks that the letter is incomplete.
There was something more that the girl in the letter wants to say, wants to explain.
She exhaled impatiently and massaged her temples. She has been reading this letter for the last twenty minutes of the beginning of this subject and she's getting all nuts. How could she appreciate this literary piece when she couldn't even understand it in the first place?
Five minutes.
"Usui-kun, you're late again."
Her head automatically snapped up at the sight of the guy she was secretly admiring, the first student in this school to discover her embarrassing secret, the first guy to see her in a maid outfit and the first guy who keeps on making her heart beat faster and faster every time she'd see him.
Usui Takumi occupied the desk just in front of her and grabbed his book from under his desk before turning to her.
"Ayuzawa, what page is that?"
His voice was melody to her that it took her every ounce of willpower to snap out of her fantasy and answers his question. "It's in page 102, line 3."
"Thanks."
He whispered to her with such tenderness that she almost wanted to cry because he averted his gaze away from her but she couldn't bear to be possessive. She wasn't that kind of person. As long as it's possible, she'd give him the freedom he wants even if it would hurt him. Because ever since she forced him to not leave for England, he became disturbingly quiet and even more kind to her.
At first she thought it was the guilt card but she was wrong. It was the real Usui Takumi she was interacting with everyday and somehow, it pains her to see him like that. He needs to leave to sort out his life but she didn't give him that chance.
She was selfish. He doesn't deserve her.
She gripped her pen tightly as a sudden flare of rage appeared on her heart.
He needs to leave to sort out a few things on his life.
According to the letter, he didn't tell her to wait for him. All he said was goodbye and that he loves him. Period. That was all for him—her—to say, right? What else could there be? He needs to leave and he doesn't require her to wait for him.
Misaki absentmindedly scribbled the things on her mind and eventually finished it with the few time allotted to her. She even managed to fill half of the paper and when the teacher asks them to put down their pens, she still hadn't stop writing. She needs to say this. She needs to decode her words through this reaction paper they are asked to do. She needs to tell him her feelings.
She needs to let him go.
And wait for him even though he didn't ask her to do it.
"Ayuzawa-san, I said stop writing."
But she refused to listen. It was only then that Usui—which is in front of her—grabbed her wrist and smiled at her.
"Ayuzawa." He murmured ever so lightly. "Stop."
Misaki straightened up her back and without thinking; she stood up and handed her paper to her teacher. "I'm sorry, please excuse me for awhile. I don't feel so good, I'm going to the infirmary, ma'am."
Without further ado, Misaki rushed out of the room and run towards the only place she could find peace, the rooftop. She stayed there hidden until she finally heard the bell for the third subject to the last rang.
He needs to leave. He needs to leave her.
She doesn't have to wait for him since he didn't ask for it either.
And lastly, she has to let go.
She has to let go of him.
The wind blew so hard if possible; she would want to be taken away too. Until she heard his sad voice.
"Ayuzawa."
Misaki tried so hard to not shoot him dagger like glares. "Call me Kaichou."
"Ayuzawa, what's the problem?" Usui sat beside her and plopped his head on her shoulders. And despite the anger, she still couldn't shrug him off for fear that he'd be hurt and for fear that she was the one to hurt him. Again.
Usui sighed and at the same time grinned because he knew that he was going to win the first round. His dear Ayuzawa didn't shrug him off. "Ayuzawa, hey, speak to me."
There was a short pause before she finally responded to him plea. Misaki turned to him with those readable eyes that convey pure pain and suffering before sighing. "Usui, I want you to leave for England as soon as possible. If the time would allow, I want you to leave tomorrow early in the morning."
Misaki's eyes didn't waver upon seeing the expression of hurt and surprise on Usui's eyes. He was surprise, she wonders why?
When he didn't spoke, she continued again. "You need to leave, Usui. You need to sort out and organized your life. And it'd be better for me if I wouldn't be able to see you."
There was no response coming from him and somehow, it had pained her. It pains her to see his hurt expression. More so, it pains her to see him reacting like that because of her.
He looked at her with those unfathomable eyes that says nothing before responding. "I have your reaction paper during Literature's time."
She froze at that. "Uh—what?"
Ignoring what she said, Usui revealed the still smooth paper and began reading it in front of her.
My dearest,
I'm afraid that I have to allow you to leave for it was indeed the time for you to face the obstacles on your life alone. You have to go, my love, and I have to set you free. You have to take this chance to be with your real family and experience the love you've always longed for that even I couldn't fill.
Goodbye, my love, my dearest and my one. I will never forget the times we have spent together and I promise that even if you hadn't asked me to wait for you; you know that I still do.
That I will still do.
This unrequitable love, my dear, shall never end for it will always be present in my heart until our forever ends.
Goodbye, Usui Takumi, may you find joy on your life and I hope you won't forget me.
Go to England and if possible, never come back.
Ayuzawa Misaki
Usui grinned at Misaki and sighed. He pulled her up and gently squeezed her palms. "I'm leaving for England tomorrow, Kaichou."
That and he started to walk away.
It took every ounce of Misaki's will and strength to not run after him and stop him because she knew that she would just end up being selfish again.
The air blew so hard she wish she'd be taken by it.
Until she found that piece of paper on the pocket of her uniform. Her forehead creased as slowly, she unfolded the paper and read the contents of the paper which made her eyes rounded even more.
Ayuzawa Kaichou,
Wait for me because our forever will never end.
Usui.
Slowly, she realized what was the other thing the one who writes the letter still wants to convey. It was the fact that even though left unsaid, he still wants for her to wait for him. He wants her to take the initiative.
He wants her to wait for him because indeed, their forever is eternal.
Endless.
Like her faith and love for him.
—
YES! I pass my Thesis defense! This is for you and as well for me. The next chapter for Cinderella will soon be post. Thanks and sorry for the long wait.
MO13
