Thank you for reading! Just to make things clear, I will be finishing This Is My Room, Not Yours sooon! But before that I hope you enjoy my new one! Its about Deidara and Sasori so I'm sorry if you don't like couple!
Why do I cry everyday? Why do I lay here with no one but myself? Why do I always mess things up? Why am I even alive? So many questions I ask myself everyday. I just wish someone would come along and answer them. Even at my old school, no one answered my questions. No one knew I existed. No one even knew my name. I just sat there and looked pretty, if anyone could have been bothered to turn around and look at me. I do the same thing everyday: wake up, fall back asleep, finally wake up, get up, go to school, think about why I'm alive, home time, eat, sleep, end of. Why am I like this? I remember when I was a happy child called Deidara Iwagakure. I always had danna. My danna. He left me to soon. To soon to even say that his life was even worth living. He just vanished. Never found, always lost. If he saw me now he would never talk to me again. Living on the streets, turning to prostitution for money. Its fair to say that I look the same as I did when I was little. So even if he did see me, would he remember who I was? What did I do to deserve this life? I was always a happy, smiley boy! Always! But no, after all my attempts to be good, God has to lay this shit on me! Why? If God even existed why would he let me do this to myself? Isn't he meant to help us? I never think of life like this but when I do, I always find a way to hurt myself even more than I hurt right now.
I can feel pain. For the forth time, I can feel it. I feel it better now. Its so clear. It's because of the blood, isn't it? I wonder what I look like when I smile. I've never actually smiled to myself in a mirror and I haven't let anyone, who I smile to, live. I twitch my eyes and they burst open. I couldn't help myself, I began panting. I felt a drop of sweat fall from my head. Last time I felt like this was when I was with danna. My hair fell onto my face. I couldn't care less if I was in the middle of no where, half naked, hair in my face and about to throw up. I held my head to stop my dizziness. I gritted my teeth and went back to shut my eyes. I can feel him. He's close to me. I stare up at the sky. Heavy bolts soon crashed down to the land beside me. I decide that this is the time to run. I clutched my shoulder as I got up and ran. I found trees. The rain wasn't helping me at all. The thunder still was crashing around me. I held my shoulder tighter and ran faster. I don't care where I am going, what I am doing. I don't care if I fall. I don't care if I run straight into a tree. I felt a stump on my toe. I was forced onto the ground by the gravity which pulled me. I don't care, I crawled. I found a tree which had a cave behind it. I ran. Still holding my shoulder. I really shouldn't have tried to attack a ninja. If I hadn't have done it then I might have been able to run a little faster. I came to the cave. I pushed my body against the side of the rocks. I fell, face forward onto the ground. I heard a slight whisper from the distance. It echoed in the cave. It was a manly voice. Almost a heavenly man voice. I hear them coming. They have come. I feel their hand on my chest and back pushing and pulling me so that I sat up straight. My eyes blinked uncontrollably, and I found myself unable to keep my eyes open for much longer. The last thing I remember seeing is brown eyes. Definitely male. I sighed to myself, in my head. Why am I so pathetic? All I do is run from what I just did. What did I just do? I can't even remember. I remember one thing. Eyes. Brown eyes. Like a oak colour. I can still feel the warmth of the hands on my front and back. Then I feel... Happy. Happiness? Why? Of all the things in the world, why happiness? I grit my teeth and push myself up in determination. My eyes want to open, I feel them wanting to just open and kill whoever is in front of me.
''Careful!'' I relax. They are still trying to sit me up. I go ahead and help them. I feel them pushing my head down slowly so that it taps the floor. No pain comes to me. If he was an enemy he would have just smashed my head into tiny pieces. I feel his hands once again. He pushes back the hair on my face. Its like a play. Take away the curtains to see the show. He took away my fringe to see my face. I hear him gasp. I just stay still. I wonder why my eyes don't want to open any more. They don't want to, so I'm forcing them to. I flutter my eyes open. I see him. He's crying. One hand over his mouth and the other on my forehead. I can't see straight, ''Is...Is that you?'' He stutters under the sound of him crying. I focus my eyes on his face. Is it him? Is it really. The man bends down in front of me. He plants a kiss on my head. I'm confused. Why? Who? Who is this person? He obviously knows who I am, but why don't I know him? I then realise where I had seen him before. He was from Suna, when I attacked there I saw him with someone else. Why is he here? ''It's okay if you- don't remember me- '' He's still crying. I stare at the tears rolling from his eyes and dripping onto my shoulders. I remember when I used to cry. When I used to want to be dead, ''I know your thinking of when you were a child.'' I was surprised when he said exactly what I was thinking about. He lifted his hand from my forehead and reached for something that was behind him. I tried to bend my head so I could see what it was. He saw me and pushed my head back. We scowled at each other for a few seconds before he smiled. He tugged at my shirt, were my left arm went through. He rolled it up and examined my arm, ''Nasty wound you got there!'' He pulled himself together and held back the tears. He started to smile and be happy. I loved seeing him happy! His eyes just lit up like a Christmas tree! They went from oak to almost a really really tanned colour. His smile was infectious and I started to smile back. He was so beautiful when he was happy.
''Heh its nothing, really un!'' He rubbed a small amount of cream on my arm. He wrapped a bandage around my arm. My face scowled in pain.
''Its only a little anti-bacterial cream, it should stop stinging in a sec, '' For once I felt like I know him. I feel like I can trust him with my life and he will save me. I wonder why I feel like this about someone. I saw his face concentrating as he kept wrapping the bandage around my upper left arm. He took a glimpse of me from one eye. He smiled and looked back down at his work. He tapped my on the shoulder, ''There! All done!'' We smiled at each other.
''Thanks un,''
''Ha, its fine!'' We ended up staring at each other for a few minutes, like a competition. I decided I would win by cheating somehow. The only thing that came to mind was sticking my tongue out. So I did. He blinked his eyes.
''I win!'' I laughed.
''I remember when you used to do that all the time when we were young, '' I stared at him for a second and he paused, mesmerized. He stood up. I saw his face, his mouth was slightly open and his eyes were wide. He was backing away from me, as if I were a monster trying to eat him, ''I'm...I'm sorry I didn't mean to. Its just I...I'm sorry!'' I tried to stand up to speak to him face-to-face but he ran. I tried shouting after him but all that I heard back were footsteps. And then quiet. I sat down. Who the hell was he? Why did he kiss me? Why did he run? Why...
I hope you like the first little bit:D reviews always help!
