You're My Fate

"Do you have any idea how it hurts?"Your devilish smile never fades. I know you'll laugh as you watch me suffer...But still, you're the only one who can read my pain…No matter how much we despise this fate.

Trapped in the dark, I sold my soul to break away,hoping you to set me free

If you'd only share this hell…

You're my nightmare anyhow.

"Maybe when a person truly has no alternative, there's nothing left to do but to smile.

You wish you'd be strong, that you will no longer be vulnerable...But in the end, you've accepted your vulnerabilities, and learnt to live with them."

In the shadow of the dawn, there's no sunlight. I may just wander on the street at 4 in the morning and dance with the vanishing stars...

...Had another dream about you. It's been a long time that I can't think of anything, can't feel for anything. There's no reason for me to wake up in the mornings. Get up at 6 a.m. everyday, then take a look in the mirror, I see a face so strange, a lonely soul trapped within a body so numb, breathing, aching, screaming...

My skin's the color of pale malt, with locks of raven hair and eyes of chocolate brown. I see a pair of glasses hiding my pretty, insensitive eyes, reminds me of the way I'm hiding my feelings and wishes. After routine depression I go for school that begins at 7:20, and starts a hell of a day.

I don't see the point and every once in a while my mind's frozen... I've lost it.

It's been 6 years, still, I just can't wipe my memories to get over you.

Listening to Marlin's Playing My Game on the way to school like I always do, the bone-chilling wind of Feburary cut through my school uniform. The ashen teaching building gets closer and closer, I breathed in cool air then walked in.

..I held on as long as I could

If I could change it, I would

This is the way I am,

And this is what I do.

I cry my tears

But they're not for you

Playing a game

I know you've done too

I shouldn't have waited,

But still it's all the same

Cause you know,

I'm just playing my game.

Everything I do I give the best I could, at least I used to. In order to impress and convince everybody I'm cultured and excellent. On the surface I act like the solitude don't faze me, inside it drives me insane. Outsiders say I'm stubborn, they say I'm difficult, they just don't have a clue. They don't know what it's like to live in a society with no relative. My father is the only one who'd willing to give up anything for me. Of course I appreciate him, though he set me apart from our family. And my mom?... Hell, you don't wanna know.


…China, land of mystery, charm and long history.

You just got transfered to this new country and no one knows you. You have remarkable blond hair and blue eyes that makes you stand out no matter you want it or not.

Everyone noticed your appearance as soon as you walked in the class.

And that's when I targeted you to be...Well, a partner.

Since you yet have no idea what's coming to storm your life.

You greeted after the teacher introduced you. In accordance with expectation, they all exclaimed with admiration and interest. A polite smile formed on my face out of reflex, then a sudden feeling of disgust cast it off before I knew it.

Gregory from Yardale… What is a British top student doing here?

"Take the seat beside Chang…Chang, put your hand up." I nodded at you, then got your gentle smile as a reply. Social. No surprise, my English is better than most teachers and I just won the spoken English championship last month.

Even though I prefer French….However, as a Chinese citizen, dual nationality isn't something you can easily brag about here.

The English lesson is like teaching kindergarten, I caught your smirks through the corner of my eye…Exactly.

"So, why did you come to China?"I whispered.

"To learn Chinese, and your culture."

"Oh yeah? By risking your magnificent future in Yardale?"

You raised an eyebrow."…I have my reasons.. Chang, is it? "

"Léa."

"Interesing…Isn't that a French name?"

I simply smiled. "Bien sur."