Sayonara, Taichou

"Come with me, Izuru."

Kira gets up. His legs wobble from sitting still so long and his blue eyes are huge holes in his head. He steps out into the hallway, watching the slits of Gin's eyes, the length of his smile, searching for hints to his captain's mood. So much of his life hangs on that mood, the fickleness of Gin's humor. He licks cracked lips and tastes blood.

Gin touches his blonde hair, lank and greasy from time spent in the cell. Kira, without thinking about it, leans his head into that touch. He wants to rub himself on Gin's colorless skin, coat himself in the sweet smell of his captain. He feels like it will clean him off, wash away some sin he doesn't know he's committed yet.

Gin chuckles softly, pressing his lips to Kira's forehead. "Aa, Izuru, ya shouldn't have to worry so much. It ain't gonna go on for much longer."

Kira feels the thrill of fear shoot through his stomach, into his skin and he jerks his head up to stare at his captain, his lover, the man who he has decided to follow, right or wrong. The man who he has given his loyalty and a chunk of his soul to.

"What does that mean?" He grabs Gin by the collar, a threatening gesture he would never have attempt if he were in his right mind. "What does that mean?" His voice cracks.

Gin stares at him with slitted eyes, then leans forward to gently press his lips to Kira. The kiss brings tears to his eyes that he swallows back, afraid to let them overflow, afraid to admit that this is goodbye. "No." He whimpers the words, begs, pleads. He wants to kneel and press his face into Gin's stomach and promise him that he will be all the right things, the right kind of soldier and lover and everything if only Gin will stay.

But he sees the answer in Gin's smile, in his eyes, before Gin speaks. "It's about Aizen, isn't it?" he says. "You're…wherever you're going, it's about Aizen. He isn't dead, is he?" Because there is one look. One expression Gin has, where everything that makes him Kira's captain disappears and he looks softer, younger, worshipful.

That is the look that means he loves Aizen. Aizen and not Kira. Aizen, for no reason Kira can discern. Aizen who leaves him bruised and cut and occasionally shaking in Kira's arms, wordless and whimpering.

Gin chuckles softly. "I knew there was a reason I took ya on as my lieutenant. Ya gonna look out fo' them when I'm gone?"

"Don't go," Kira pleads quietly. Gin touches his face and Kira knows it's hopeless. Whatever Gin feels for him is a shadow, a flickering candlelight to the flame that burns in him for Aizen. Like that flame that burns in Kira, for Gin.

"Sorry, Izuru. It's just how it's gotta be, ya know?"

Then Gin kisses him again. Longer, softer, sweeter. It is a quiet kiss, the kind of kiss Kira would have gone through a thousand battles for. A gentle, melding kiss with no pressure or taunting or games. It is Gin's hand against the back of his neck, twining against his hair, Gin's arm stroking his back until Kira wants to cry again. And when Gin pulls away it is slow, and his eyes are there, slits of red meeting Kira's.

Then he steps back completely and smiles again, the mask sliding tightly into place. "Come on, Izuru. We got a meetin' with Hitsugaya-sama. We ain't gonna be late for a meetin' with such an important personage."

Kira wants to cling and beg Gin for a moment longer, but there is only one answer a good soldier can give and until such a time as Gin dismisses or leaves him, he is still his vice-captain.

"Yes, Captain. I'm coming."