Deleted Scene: Nudge's POV of what happened upstairs in Chapter 41 of School Days. Not necessary to read, but definitely something that may be interesting. (: enjoy!

I knocked quietly on Gazzy's door before pulling it open. I was greeted with the familiar mix of burning chemicals covered by Febreeze, a scent that had clung to Gazzy's room, clothing, and person since he had received his first science kit at age eight. Before that, he had always smelled like sweat and grass from his constant presence on soccer fields. When I stood close enough, I could still smell the grass underneath the general something-just-exploded odor his clothing was permenantly tainted with.

But I rarely stood that close anymore.

Gazzy looked up from the Bunsen burner he was fiddling with. Two or three of the heaters were lined up on his desk, a bare wooden surface littered with burn and chemical scars. A fire extinguisher sat at his feet, and a pair of clear plastic glasses covered his eyes. "Nudge," Gazzy stated, his voice unreadable as he straightened up. Gazzy flicked his glasses up to rest on his head amid his blonde spikes, his blue eyes never leaving me.

I shifted awkwardly, knowing that I had been the one to create this wall between us. This horrible, crushing wall of stiffness and hurt. I had deliberately avoided him, knowing that he didn't approve of my relationship with Dylan. Gazzy was my best friend, and I couldn't stand that he openly scoffed at my new boyfriend. From the second I told him we were dating, I could see it in Gazzy's eyes that he didn't like this new situation. Not one bit. And this was only confirmed a second later when Gazzy opened his mouth to tell me so.

And thus started my avoidance of my best friend. I was pretty sure no one noticed it, but suddenly Gazzy and I never hung out alone anymore. My free time was scarce between school and soccer, and I spent all of it with Dylan. I was pretty miserable about not talking to Gaz, but I just couldn't handle that he didn't approve of my decision to date Dylan. I could still remember him telling me that I didn't know the guy, I only liked him for his looks, that we'd barely known each other for a week. Gazzy was so frustrated with me that he almost grabbed my shoulders and shook me. At the last second he seemed to remember that I had a broken wrist, and carefully released me before turning and walking slowly away. I didn't follow. And that was the last time I spoke to Gazzy in private.

"Hey Gaz." I finally spoke, my voice soft.

"Wrist?" Gazzy's eyes pierced through me, intense and serious. He was not in a good mood right now.

"Doing better," I replied quietly, stroking my cast absentmindedly. "You know me and my bones."

"Yeah, I do know you," Gazzy murmured, pinning me with a sharp glance. His hands rose to the sides of his head, hovering over the arms of his glasses as if itching to pull them back down over his eyes and continue with his experiment. It was a cue for me to leave him alone, and I knew it.

But I wasn't ready to go yet.

"What was up with the pony thing downstairs?" I asked, trying to sound firm and casual at the same time. Gazzy had not been mindlessly playing with the My Little Ponies. He had definitely been trying to make a point, but I wasn't sure exactly what it was yet.

Gazzy tensed, and this time his hands did tug his glasses back down. The clear plastic reflected the light from his overhead lamp, masking his eyes from my view. "Angel likes my stories," was his short reply. Gazzy bent down over the Bunsen burner again, peering at a beaker full of bubbling yellowish liquid. He nodded decisively and jotted something down on a notepad.

"That is defintely not your only reason for creating that whole spiel, Gaz, and I know it," I informed him, undaunted by his clear signals that he was busy. Gazzy had every right to be mad at me for avoiding him, but I was trying to stop avoiding him now. I wasn't going to be deterred by his annoyance with me. "Something has been bugging you lately. I know that you're aware that our friends have been trying to figure out what it is. You almost told Max what it was before you got interrupted. But you didn't tell Fang, or Iggy, or Ella, or Terra-"

"I don't feel the need to broadcast the reasons for my mood," Gazzy interrupted flatly, his eyes fixed on the beaker. He pulled a packet of white powder from his desk drawer, and started measuring it into a cylinder. "And I don't appreciate everyone trying to pry it out of me."

"They're your friends," I pointed out, "They're only worried about you-"

"How come you weren't worried enough to ask then?" Gazzy demanded, slamming the cylinder down on his desk. The beaker on the Bunsen burner rattled, but Gazzy didn't seem to care.

"I was worried!" I shot back, shutting the door and heading over to the desk. "But I didn't think you would want to talk to me about it since-" I paused, hesitating at ending the sentence.

"Since?" Gazzy prompted, raising an eyebrow. His face was expressionless, giving nothing away.

"Since I was stupidly avoiding you because I was afraid you were mad about me dating Dylan and wouldn't want to talk to me because you think we don't know each other well enough to have a relationship so I wouldn't be your number one choice as a confidante right now and I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do because I can't stand you disapproving of me," I babbled. As per usual, my mouth seemed to run on and on of its own accord.

Gazzy was unperturbed, completely desensitized to my long dialogues after so many years of friendship. "Well what the hell did you think I was upset about in the first place?" he demanded.

"Me dating Dylan?" I guessed meekly, not meeting Gazzy's eyes.

"Yes," Gazzy agreed tiredly, leaning against the wall and linking his hands over his head. "More specifically, us not talking because you were dating Dylan."

"I'm sorry," I whispered, staring at the floor.

"I just want to know something Nudge," Gazzy pressed, dismissing my apology. "Do you really like that guy? Honestly, truly have feelings for him?"

When I didn't reply immediately, Gazzy seemed to visibly relax. "Okay," he said, smiling faintly. "That's good then."

I bristled indignantly. "What do you mean 'that's good'?" I demanded. "What's good? I didn't say anything!"

"You didn't have to," Gazzy replied, the smile fading. "If you didn't answer immediately yes, then I've still got some hope."

"Hope for what? That we'll break up?" I asked, irritated that Gazzy was jumping to conclusions just because I hadn't rushed to answer his question.

"Basically." Gazzy shrugged. "I don't like this Dylan guy. From what Fang, Iggy, and Max have said, he sounds like a slippery, charming kind of dude. That's the kind I don't trust with your heart." Gazzy stared at me seriously for a moment, and I felt a hint of a smile touch my lips at the reminder that he was there for me. I had really missed him over the past couple weeks. "Plus, I hear he doesn't even play soccer?" Gazzy frowned in mock disapproval. "Even Iggy plays soccer, and he's blind! What kind of heathen animal is this guy?"

A giggle escaped my lips involuntarily at Gazzy's merciless ragging of my boyfriend. It was true that Dylan found no appeal whatsoever in soccer. We didn't really talk about soccer though. We probably spent more time togerher making out than talking, honestly. "He's not that bad," I defended Dylan halfheartedly, knowing that Gazzy would barely even acknowledge my remark.

True to my prediction, an elegant snort was my only reply. I rolled my eyes, grinning as I settled into Gazzy's wheely desk chair and started rolling towards him. "What are you cooking up there anyway?" I asked idly, looking at the Bunsen burner.

"Nothing illegal," was his vague reply.

"How reassuring," I deadpanned, watching as Gazzy sprinkled a measure of white powder into the liquid and carefully stirred. "Wait! You never answered my question about the ponies!" I realized, sitting bolt upright in the chair.

"Nope," Gazzy agreed amiably, his eyes locked on the beaker. "This might explode, just warning you," he added, setting up a tall metal barrier around the Bunsen burner.

"Don't change the subject!" I admonished. "What was up with the ponies?"

"You aren't going to like it if I tell you," Gazzy remarked, his voice even. He peered at the Bunsen burner, jotting down something else on his notepad. I got the feeling that he was mostly doing this for show. I couldn't see anything in particular occurring in the beaker that warranted his detailed note taking.

"Well, then it's my fault for asking, not yours for answering," I reasoned.

"You really are not going to like it," Gazzy repeated. "Honestly."

"Gazzy! I don't care!" I just barely resisted the urge to screech in frustration. Instead I reached out with my good arm and snatched Gazzy's elbow, trying to pull him into facing me.

Narrow muscle flexed under my hand, and suddenly I was being yanked up from my chair instead of Gazzy moving towards me. Gazzy's hands slid onto the base my ribs at either side, pulling me close enough to him to smell the grassy scent lingering on him. He carefully avoided bumping my broken wrist, but other than that I was pulled flush against him. I stood there, injured arm limp at my side and my good hand clutching his shoulder as I tried to process what had just happened.

My heart started racing involuntarily, and I felt my cheeks heat up. Ugh! I looked so ugly when I blushed! I really didn't want Gazzy to see that. Ducking my head to the side, I focused on the carpet a foot to my left. It was spattered with an odd combination of teal and orange, and appeared to have burn marks liberally scattered around. At least that was a familiar sight to anchor myself to whilst Gazzy was introducing such a new type of hug that made my cheeks flush so disgustingly and my heart race and my thoughts start flying on overdrive and all I wanted was to snuggle closer broken wrist be damned and let him hold me.

I had really missed him.

"Nudge?" he murmured, wrapping his arms around me more firmly.

"Yes?" I found myself saying, my words exceedingly short and meek compared to the whirlwind of speech raging in my head.

"Look at me." Gazzy's voice was uncharacteristically gentle, something I'd only heard on the occassions that Gazzy had been present while I managed to break another of my bones.

"I don't want to," I muttered, feeling my cheeks heat up even more. ZOMG, I probably looked hideous right now. Ugly blushing was an unfortunate trait that ran in the Yolinta family, and I had not been able to escape it. Damn genes.

"Why not?" Gazzy asked. His tone suddenly became carefully guarded, and I frowned slightly as I realized he was trying to hide how he was really feeling from me. Again.

What the hell is wrong with boys? They never know when to open up and let people know how they're feeling.

"I'm ugly-blushing again," I explained, digging my head into the front of his shoulder in an attempt to hide said ugly-blush.

Out of the blue, Gazzy laughed, tension expelling from his body for a moment. I could feel the vibrations transferring from his chest into my body, and involuntarily felt a smile of my own creep onto my mouth. "What are you laughing about? It's not funny!" I protested, trying to sound miffed. I couldn't quite tell if it was working or not.

"I was worried you were mad about this," Gazzy admitted. His arms tightened around my back, and I didn't have to ask what he meant by 'this'. "And if this made you mad, then I definitely couldn't risk telling you about the ponies."

"But I'm not mad, I'm just ugly-blushing," I pointed out craftily. Ooh, I am so good. "So you can definitely risk telling me about the ponies, because I'm dying to know why it was so vastly important to you that Rainbow Butterfly and Star Twinkle Astronaut were in love."

Gazzy slid one of his arms down around my waist to keep me standing right up against him, but retracted his other arm. I was just about to open my mouth to question this when his newly free hand reached up and met my chin. I was so surprised that I didn't even manage to fight as Gazzy lifted my face so we were staring straight at each other. He was only two inches taller, so I barely had to lift my chin at all to look him in the eye. He had pushed the plastic glasses back up into his hair,taking away the barrier that had guarded his eyes from me. "No, Nudge," Gazzy said quietly, a hint of sadness in his eyes. "Star Twinkle Astronaut is in love with Rainbow Butterfly, but she's dating another guy."

We stared at each other for a moment in silence, and I felt Gazzy wrap his other arm back around my torso. "Nudge?" he repeated.

"Yeah?" I managed to reply. One of his hands was splayed across my upper back, the warmth seeping through my cardigan, and his other one was gently gripping the curve of my waist. It was extremely distracting, to say the least. Not to mention that I was still pressed against him front to front. Neither of us had any fat to spare on our bodies from running and playing soccer literally the equivalent of twenty four hours a week, and this meant I could feel his ribs directly on mine, the familiar unyielding abs pressed to my own compact stomach, the fronts of our hips knocking together with every slight shift. Gazzy was holding me like I might shatter if he gripped too hard, gentle and powerful at the same time. That was also very distracting.

"What would you do if I told you the whole pony thing was just a metaphor?" Gazzy asked, shaking me out of my not so innocent thoughts.

"Metaphor?" I echoed stupidly. My brain might've been firing neurons off a little slowly at the moment.

"Yeah," Gazzy agreed, his eyes locked on mine. They were so blue, pale and solid and bright all at the same time. I knew those eyes anywhere. The eyes that loved his little sister, that lived for soccer, that lit up when his experiments exploded, that darkened protectively when I came crying to him with any of my worries or problems. I trusted those eyes more than anyone else's. They never lied to me.

"How is the pony village a metaphor?" I asked. I closed my eyes briefly to get away from the blue of Gazzy's staring at me so intensely, but was only allowed a second of reprieve before Gazzy realized I wasn't looking at him anymore.

"Open your eyes and I'll tell you," Gazzy whispered, his voice dropping to a low, serious tone. A shiver dropped down my shoulders and wriggled down my spine, but I complied with his request. I blinked at him, waiting. "You're Rainbow Butterfly," Gazzy informed me, pinning me into immobility with his gaze. "And I'm Star Twinkle Astronaut."

It took me a moment to process it at first.

The words sounded silly by themselves, but I barely noticed. I was locked in Gazzy's eyes, his arms, his presence surrounding me. He watched me silently as I processed this, but his face betrayed him. I saw the hope in the slight wideness of his eyes. I saw the resignation threatening to creep in at the corners of his mouth. I saw the fear of ruining our relationship that lingered in the almost imperceptible crease above his eyebrows. He meant this. He really meant this.

Gazzy was in love with me.

A warm, bubbly feeling broke out in my stomach, spreading deliciously and terrifyingly through my veins. "I-" I tried to say. I had no idea what I thought was coming next. This new feeling of speechlessness was not one I was used to, and it frightened me a little. I was Nudge. I always had something to say! "I-"

"I know that you're probably going through shock right now, but I just want to know if I have any hope, or if I should go beat up Dylan so I don't have any competition anymore," Gazzy remarked. He was struggling to sound light and casual, but I wasn't buying it.

"Don't beat up Dylan," I admonished automatically. Gazzy looked a little disappointed, and I couldn't help but giggle. He loved me. Gazzy loved me. "He hasn't done anything wrong."

"He looked at you," Gazzy muttered, sounding like he used to when he pouted over his coaches canceling practice because it was raining. I smiled at his sulkiness, my attention caught by his pouting mouth. "He made you smile," Gazzy added. "He touched you." As if to prove his point, Gazzy ran his fingers up the side of my torso. Shivers cascaded down my spine, some ricocheting down my arms and others following the path of his hand. "He kissed you." Gazzy stared at me seriously, his face tilting closer to mine. "All of which should be my jobs, not Dylan's." His lips ghosted over mine, and my breath forcibly caught in my throat. "Don't you agree?"

There was literally no physical way that I could have forced myself not to react how I did: sling my good arm around Gazzy's neck, broken wrist hanging awkwardly over his shoulder, and press my lips hard against his until I felt giddy and free from the dizzying sensations tackling my body. He didn't appear to be surprised at all, responding instantly and kissing me back like he had been waiting for centuries to do so. Gazzy's arms tightened around my body, and warmth flooded through me as he showed no intention of ever letting go. I didn't want him to ever let me go.

That was when my cell phone sang out loudly with a short rendition of "I Would" by One Direction before falling silent again. It buzzed obnoxiously from the back pocket of my jeans, and I pulled away from his mouth to try to dig it out. Gazzy's lips ended up on the edge of my jaw instead, making me shiver as I turned my head to try to get my phone out of my jeans. I was positive that another ugly blush was appearing on my cheeks, but Gazzy didn't seem to notice my hereditary gross redness. He was more focused on trying to keep my phone in my pocket.

"Gazzy!" I shrieked, twisting and trying to slap his hand away. "Get your hands away from my butt!"

It was a good thing the door was closed. The windows too, for that matter. The last thing I needed was the neighbors complaining that Gazzy was sexually assaulting women in his house while his parents were away. They probably already had enough complaints stored up about the daily explosions erupting from his room. Sexual assault would probably drive them over the top.

"Calm down, princess," he laughed, his face more relaxed than I'd seen it in weeks. "I'm not trying to grope you. I'm just trying to stop you from taking out your phone. I'm not done with you yet."

"This sure feels a lot like groping," I muttered, my ugly blush intensifying with the combination of his words and the feeling of Gazzy's thumb shoving my cell phone deeper into my pocket.

"It's not," Gazzy assured me, his cheek grazing mine as he lowered his head, forcing another shiver down my spine. I vaguely wondered if Gazzy thought I was sick or something, from the amount of shivers that had racked my body in the past few minutes. "Dylan is the creepy groper, not me."

That reminded me of something. "I have a boyfriend!" I realized, my head shooting up. "Oh my God, I just cheated on my boyfriend! What kind of a slut am I? ZOMG, I'm a slut!" I pounded my good fist against Gazzy's chest, trying to get him to let me go. "You made me a slut! Best friends don't let their best friend become a slut, Gazzy Richards!"

"Calm down, Nudge," Gazzy tried to say, grabbing the wrist of the hand that was smacking him. I considered using my broken wrist to whack him, but realized that would only cause me more pain and him barely any, and so refrained from anymore violence. "Nudge, you aren't a slut."

"I am such a whore," I moaned, letting my forehead dig into Gazzy's shoulder.

"No you aren't!" Gazzy disagreed vehemently. Contrary to his tone, the arms that still held me were gentle.

"But I cheated on Dylan! It doesn't matter that I prefer you to him by a longshot, it matters that I'm his girlfriend and I just kissed you and freaking enjoyed it and honestly want nothing more right now than to just do it again!"

After a second of silence, we both realized what I had just said. I just couldn't keep my big mouth shut, now could I?

"You do?" Gazzy asked softly.

Before I could say anything, my cell phone buzzed again, reminding me of the text I hadn't read yet. I pulled it out silently, opening the message before Gazzy could protest. We both stared at the glowing screen. It was Terra.

Do you think Gazzy likes someone else?

Before I could think of an excuse to disguise this display of Terra's crush on him, Gazzy let loose a long-suffering sigh. "I've been trying to discourage her for the past month now," Gazzy muttered, sounding exasperated.

"You knew that Terra liked you?" I demanded, glancing between my phone and him.

Gazzy looked irritated. "Of course I knew," he replied. Gazzy released his hold on me with one arm to run a hand through his blond spikes, almost dislodging the safety glasses resting there. Against my will, thoughts of how adorable he looked with the glasses propped on his head flashed through my mind. Apparently I was even distracted by thoughts of Gazzy when I was talking to him. That kiss and confession-in-My-Little-Pony-form had really turned my head upside down.

Completely unaware of my internal turmoil, Gazzy continued on normally, "Every one of our friends has been practically shoving her at me since they found out who she liked. Terra is my friend, so I've been trying to play dumb and discourage her rather than flat out rejecting her."

I processed this, staring hard at my phone screen. When I thought about it, it was a kind reaction on Gazzy's part to try to gently push her away instead of informing her he had only platonic feelings. Terra was a prideful person, and leaving her pride injured that he had known and not reciprocated her feelings would have destroyed their friendship completely.

My screen still glowed with Terra's message, mocking me: Do you think Gazzy likes someone else?

I imagined a reply text:

Yes, Terrs. He likes me. In fact, he loves me. (: Sorry bout that, but whatevs, that's the way the cookie crumbles. See you at school! ily!

My stomach lurched. I was a horrible person. I had just kissed a guy who wasn't my boyfriend and who was the crush of my best friend. "I suck," I said softly, bowing my head so my frizzy curls curtained my face. I didn't want Gazzy to see the shame written there in bold print.

"No you don't," Gazzy replied instantly, trying to pull me against him. "It's not your fault that I don't like Terra as more than a friend."

"Yeah it is," I disagreed. "Because you like me instead of her, so it's technically my fault for getting in the way of her happiness."

Gazzy grabbed my chin again, forcing me to look at him. Plain disbelief was etched across his face. "Please don't tell me you actually believe that bull," he stated, voice dead serious.

I pulled away from his grasp, feeling tears welling up in my eyes. I tried to remember if I had worn waterproof mascara today. I had a sinking feeling in my gut that I was going to need it in a minute. "It's the truth," I answered stubbornly. "I can't break Terra's heart like this."

"Wait. Are you saying you're going to deny liking me because you don't want to hurt Terra?" Silence hung in the room, but Gazzy's accusation rang in my head, hurt and disbelieving.

"It would break her heart," I whispered, imagining the frequent sight of Terra's tear streaked face as she wailed that Gazzy would never like her. I couldn't be the reason for its next reappearance. I just couldn't.

"So you want to break mine instead?" Gazzy growled. He let go of me, stepping away as betrayal flashed clearly across his face. I missed him immediately, but I couldn't let my resolve crumble. I was doing what would end up hurting less people in the end- right?

"Gazzy, I'm s-"

"Don't you dare apologize," Gazzy snapped, turning and walking towards the window. He stared outside, tense and motionless. "I thought I was your best friend, Nudge," he added, his voice more subdued.

"You are," I managed to choke out.

"Best friends don't break their best friend's heart," he whispered.

Tears slid down my nose. I reached a finger up to touch a stream of the water, and found my finger streaked black. I hadn't worn waterproof mascara. My makeup was probably slipping and sliding down my face with this sudden new torrent of tears. All of the careful work I had put into my appearance earlier today just went down the drain.

I couldn't bring myself to care.

"Gazzy, I do lo-"

He held up his hand, cutting me off. "If you let Terra's feelings, which you have no control over, take precedence over mine, which you have every control over…" Gazzy lingered on the sentence for a moment, and I shivered at the raw hurt in his words. "Then you definitely don't feel the same way about me that I do about you. I would put nobody before you, Nudge."

More mascara -tainted tears flew down my face. More than anything I wanted to launch myself back into his arms and forget about Terra's feelings. But I couldn't just let myself ruin her like that.

My head was overwhelmed with emotion. I couldn't think clearly. I felt dizzy just standing there. The usually familiar scents of Gazzy's room suddenly crowded me, and I wondered vaguely if I was going to faint.

Without another word, I bolted out his door, flew down the stairs, and sprinted for the door. I passed Max and Fang on my desperate escape, and their surprised faces followed me out the door. I ignored them, my feet slapping down the sidewalk as I ran away as fast as I could from what I knew in my gut was a horrible mistake.

Merry Christmas! –evil laugh- I love you all, and hope you have a great holiday season and New Year! (:

The thing about 'I Would' being Nudge's ringtone was I thought it fit poor Gazzy's situation pretty nicely. for example, one verse:

"Back in my head we were kissing/ I thought things were going alright/ with a sign on my back saying 'kick me'/ reality ruined my life."

so yeah. reality did just ruin his life as soon as he thought he had Nudge. OUCH. =P poor Gasser.

Reviews would be a lovely holiday gift. (; I adore you all!

~TMI~