"Because, you're too little, and you'll cut yourself." Alice Mitchell calmly explained as she began to cut a second triangular eyehole in the round, squat pumpkin.
"I will not! I use a knife all th' time to spread peanut butter on my samwiches!" Dennis said defiantly, pointing at himself with his right thumb.
"A butter knife is much duller than a carving knife, Dennis. Now please let me carve this Jack O' Latern in peace, young man!" Alice reprimanded.
Dennis bit his bottom lip in anger, incensed that he hadn't gotten his way. He turned and stomped his way to the kitchen door, making sure to be extra loud so that his mother would be annoyed. However, he believed that she was ignoring him on purpose. Suddenly, he had an idea. He immediately turned back around to face his mother, a smile on his face and his right index finger extended in the air. "I could put the candle inside and light it!" He said hopefully.
"You may NOT light it, young man! That's grown-up work, and we'll see about you putting the candle in. Halloween's still a week away! Be patient!" Alice said squarely, giving him a sideways authoritarian look.
Dennis bowed his head in a cross way and began to mutter angrily under his breath, as he once again turned and headed for the door. Upon reaching it, Dennis reared back his leg, only to hear the shout of his mother. "Don't you dare kick that door, Dennis Mitchell!"
Dennis turned back around in fright, his eyes as wide as they could open. Alice was still focusing on the pumpkin, her face wasn't even turned towards her son.
Dennis looked down nervously, before quietly exiting through the swinging kitchen door, thinking to himself uneasily [I swear, my Mom has eyes in the back of her head...]
Dennis then looked up to see his father, Henry, standing in front of him. "Watch out for Mom, Dad. She's pie-sick, she's usin' the eyes behind her hair!" Dennis warned, pointing backward toward the kitchen.
"I think you mean psychic. All Moms have it." Henry informed him.
"Really? You sure she's not a witch like the Mom on TV?" Dennis asked.
"Well.." Henry began, before bending down to Dennis' height and whispered "..she acts like a witch, sometimes. But, she's just an average woman."
"I heard that.." Came Alice's voice from the kitchen.
"See what I mean?" Henry said with a discreet wink.
Dennis nodded.
"By the way, Dennis, notice anthing different about me?" Henry asked.
Dennis put his index finger to his chin and squinted his eyes. He could see a moderate amount of stubble above his father's upper lip. Finally, he said decisively "Yeah, your face needs a haircut!"
Henry chuckled and replied "Not this time, Tex. I'm growing a moustache!"
Dennis paused for a short bit, a confused look on his face, before finally shrugging and asking "Why?"
Henry just smiled, reached over and tossled Dennis' hair, saying "Well, I'm just looking for a change, Son." as Dennis combed his hair back into place with an annoyed expression.
, Dennis' Kindergarten teacher, a thin and unhappy looking woman with short, greying brown hair, dressed in a drab grey skirt that hung past her bony thighs and a spotless white cotton blouse, rang the miniature bell that sat on her slightly cluttered desk, and announced at a very high tone of voice "Alright, everyone, put your art supplies away in their proper places and leave your canvases to dry!"
The class began to do as they were told, however, could see that there was still some work activity going on near the front of the class, and it didn't take a math whiz to figure out whom it was. "Dennis Mitchell! I told you to put your things away!" She shouted in his general vicinity.
"Hold yer horses, Miss F! I'm puttin' the finishin' touches on my paintin' for the Halloween College." Dennis said defensively, tapping his tanned canvas with his brush in a rythmic motion.
"I will hold no horses, young man!" Ms. Farnsworth snapped. "I distinctly remember ordering everyone in the class, including you, to put your materials away! And, by the way, it's not a college, it's a collage!"
"Whatever.." Dennis said, putting his paintbrush down in a huff and crossing his arms across his multicolor stained apron.
Ms. Farnsworth marched over towards Dennis and his canvas, asking gruffly "Just what was it that was so blasted important that you couldn't wait to finish it 'til tomorrow?"
Dennis hung his head down sadly, replying in a somber tone "I just wanted to do a real good job for the school.."
Ms. Farnsworth took the canvas from it's wooden stand and looked it over with a critical eye. It appeared to be a fairly impressive drawing of some form of creature, a large green ball with tiny red beady eyes, a needle thin orange nose and a humungous mouth that took over most of it's form. The mouth was wide open and displayed a large row of crooked yellow razor sharp teeth, and a long worm-like tongue that protruded from the gaping maw and rested lazily outside of the mouth's entrance, stuck to the outside of the beast's face, as if with adhesive. Two barely visible little stick legs and feet positioned beneath the creature seemed to be performing quite a balancing act at keeping the head/body upright.
Ms. Farnsworth gave an impressed smirk of amusement, something she never dreamed she'd do in front of Dennis, and said in an upbeat voice "My, My, Dennis, this is quite an art piece here! I can understand why you'd want to keep working on it. Very imaginative.." She congratulated him, before asking innocently "I hope you don't mind my asking, Dennis, but what manner of monster is this exactly?"
Dennis' head was still hung low, but now it, along with his whole body, was beginning to shudder in an involuntary spasm. He put his hands to his mouth and raised his head to reveal he was trying to stifle himself from giggling. Finally, the young boy couldn't take it anymore and burst out laughing, pointing towards Ms. Farnsworth with his right hand, and explaining in-between gasps of air from his laughing fit "I..It's..It's not a..m..monster,Miss F..It's..It's YOU! HA HA HA! Happy Halloween, Miss F!"
As Dennis continued to laugh at the top of his lungs, the other children joined in, pointing and laughing at their befuddled teacher. However, it soon became apparent by the redness gathering in her face, her twitching right eye, and her gritting teeth, that Ms. Farnsworth was far from amused.
Dennis left Kindergarten that day with a sour look on his face, a slump in his shoulders, and a bright yellow note in his hand. Yellow notes being sent home with you was rarely a pleasant sign. Two of Dennis' friends, Tommy Anderson and Dewey Grove, were walking on either side of him.
"That was pretty wild, Dennis!" Tommy exclaimed, a wide grin on his face.
"Yeah, that really took guts!" Dewey said admiringly.
"Yeah, yeah, you guys don't have to worry about giving a note to your Mom.." Dennis said with a scowl.
"So, who says you gotta give it to her? Why don't you just throw it away?" Dewey suggested with a chuckle.
A sly look came over Dennis' face. "That's a great idea, Dewey!" Dennis said, before quickly crumpling up the note into a ball of paper and tossing it down a sewer drain.
"Whoa! I didn't really mean it!" Dewey said in surprise, his hands up defensively.
"Oh, well.." Dennis said, shrugging.
"By the way, Dennis, d'you know what you're gonna be for Halloween, yet?" Tommy asked.
"Yeah! I'm gonna be Tarzan! I'm gonna try to find a costume for Ruff so he can be Cheetah!" Dennis said enthusiastically.
"Sounds good! I'm gonna be Fred Flintstone!" Tommy said happily, pointing to himself.
"Again?" Dennis and Dewey asked in unison.
"Hey, I really like that costume!" Tommy said, slightly aggrivated.
"This is the third Halloween in the row you've been Fred. Isn't that plastic mask all old and crushed and old by now?" Dennis asked, arching his eyebrow.
"Nah, it's only been two, and I always get a new one ev'ry year." Tommy said matter-of-factly.
"Okay." Dennis replied, before turning to Dewey and asking "D'you know what you're gonna be?"
Dewey nodded and said with a broad smile "Yeah, a martian! My Mom found this cool costume at the 5 and Dime that looks out of this world!"
"What else are martians supposed to be?" Dennis said with a chuckle, then soon enough, all three boys were in stitches.
Finally, the three had approached Dennis' house. "Well, guys, I'll talk to ya later!" Dennis said, before racing up the pathway, up the steps, and through the front door. Once inside, Dennis carelessly tossed his dark green backpack and light blue jacket on the floor and shouted out "MOOOOOM! I'M HOOOOOME!"
Alice replied sweetly from the kitchen "Okay, Dear! Did you hang up your coat and backpack in the closet?"
"YES, MOM!" Dennis lied.
"Did anything happen at school?" Alice asked in the same unassuming voice.
"No, Mom, everything was pretty normal." Dennis answered.
"Oh, really, young man?" Alice asked, in a slightly demanding voice, as she emerged from the kitchen, a large, moist, wooden spoon in her right hand, which she used very expressively "Then why did I just recieve a call from your teacher saying that you were naughty today, and were given a note?"
Dennis began to sweat, as he nervously tried to stand his ground and act aggresive. "Aw, Mom, you know that ol' teacher, she hates kids an' she always tries to pin sumpin' on 'em, you know I'd never.." He continued to defend himself as Alice inched closer and closer, tapping the spoon against her open left palm.
"I heard that you got in BIG trouble, Dennis!" Margaret taunted in a sing-song voice as Dennis passed her front porch.
"You heard wrong, Margaret! I only got in the usual amount a' trouble!" Dennis shouted back at her.
"Hmph!" Margaret huffed as she ran her hand through her fiery red, wood shaving like curls "I also heard your mother switched your behind with her kitchen spoon!" she continued to taunt relentlessly.
Dennis bit his bottom lip in anger and embarrasment. It had hurt twice as hard when he had been forced to sit in the corner for half an hour afterwards. He decided not to answer Margaret this time.
"Well? Ready to admit that I'm right?" Margaret said, now beginning to walk behind Dennis, the fact that she stood a head taller than him becoming evident as she loomed behind him, tapping him repeatedly on the back of his right shoulder. "Hey! I'm talking to you!" she persisted.
Dennis swiftly brushed Margaret's hand away. "You'd better cut it out!" He said in an irritated voice.
"Or you'll do what? Boys can't hit girls!" Margaret continued.
Suddenly, Dennis decided to change his approach. He grinned covertly to himself, then spun around with a friendly smile, much to Margaret's surprise, and asked in a polite voice "Say, Margaret, whatter ya gonna be for Halloween?"
"What?" Margaret asked with confusion, before adopting a look of anger and stating coldly "That's none of your business!"
"Really? 'Cause if you wanna be a witch, you don't gotta use a mask!" Dennis said in a complimentary fashion.
Margaret's face turned as red as a beet, she squinted one eye and bulged out the other behind her round, frameless glasses, before screaming in a voice that squeaked with prepubescent rage "DENNIS MITCHELL! I'M GOING TO TELL ON YOU!"
"Whoa! Say it, don't spray it, Margaret!" Dennis exclaimed with disgust, wiping saliva off of his face.
With a last sniff of anger, Margaret spun on her heel and stomped off towards her house, making sure that Dennis heard every single one of her footsteps echoing on the sidewalk.
"Happy Halloween, Margaret!" Dennis called cheerfully to her with a friendly wave of the hand.
"The Statue of Liberty, huh?" Dennis asked Gina as the two played an invigorating game of catch.
"Si, I think is nice way to thank her for bring my Mama an' Papa to 'dis bellissima country." Gina replied, cocking back her arm and shooting a very impressive fastball, which Dennis caught with little effort. Although it stung a little bit, but Dennis didn't mind a bit, he was impressed at how a girl like Gina could keep up with him in many different kinds of sports.
"Sounds fair, although I think the Fourth a' July would'a been a better time ta do that." Dennis said, leaning back and swinging a curve ball that Gina caught with relative ease.
"Si, but you no normally dress up during da fort' July." Gina countered, before twirling her arm in a windmill motion, and with a grunt of effort and a look of determination, she threw a screwball with such force that flew right into Dennis' face and hit him right in the eye! Dennis hit the ground like a sack of wet cement, as Gina placed her hands to her mouth with fright. "DENNIS! DENNIS! YOU OKAY?" she exclaimed as she rushed over to Dennis' side and kneeled down beside him.
Dennis rose in a sitting position, looked over at Gina and smiled. "Gosh, Gina! You sure can throw a screwball!" He said with utter admiration.
"Oh, Dennis! You're okay!" Gina said with a smile, giving him a big hug.
"I hope that I don't get a black eye on Halloween, though. Tarzan didn't have a black eye last time I checked." Dennis said sadly, lowering his head.
"You wan' me to kiss and make it better?" Gina asked affectionately with a blush.
"Ick! No thanks, Gina! I don't even like it when my Mom kisses me!" Dennis said, pulling back in revulsion.
Gina's smile instantly melted from her face. She furrowed her brows, gritted her teeth and raised a fist in front of Dennis' face. "How you like TWO black eyes, paisano?" She said aggresively.
"Eh, not very much.." Dennis said nervously, sweat starting to pour down his face.
As Dennis and Gina walked towards Dennis' house, the fallen orange and red leaves crunching under their shoes, Gina asked "A moustache, huh?"
"Yeah. Ever since he started growin' it, Mom won't kiss nobody in the house but me! She says his lip's too prickly." Dennis said.
Gina giggled and replied "Si, my Papa have one, is big an' furry like bruco. It tickle when he kiss me on da cheek."
"What's a broco?" Dennis asked with a confused expression.
Gina laughed out loud, holding her sides. "No broco. Bruco, silly. Is Italiano for caterpillar!" She explained.
"Oh..Okay.." Dennis said, still a little confused.
"DENNIS! How did your eye get red, young man?" Alice asked in shock when Dennis opened the front door, dropping the ladle she was holding.
"Ah, Gina just beaned me with a screwball, no big deal." Dennis said with a casual throwaway gesture.
"Oh, my poor baby!" Alice said, dropping to her knees and embracing Dennis.
"Relax, Mom, I'm okay. But I guess you could say I WAS a screwball for standin' in it's way!" Dennis exclaimed with a chuckle.
Dennis, his eye now swollen and black, and his younger friend, Joey McDonald, stood in Dennis' backyard, Joey was holding a white plastic "Trick-or-Treat" bag in his hands. "Trick-or-Eat!" Joey shouted, thrusting his plastic bag towards Dennis' face.
"No, no, Joey. How many times do I gotta tell ya? It's "Trick-or-Treat"!" Dennis said, waving his palms in front of his face, before resting them back at his sides. "Try it again."
"Okay, Dennith!" Joey said happily, before once again shoving his bag back in front of Dennis. "Trick-or-Meat!" He elatedly proclaimed.
"Dagnabbit, Joey! Halloween's a few days away, and you've gotta get it down of you're gonna go Trick-or Treatin' for tha first time!" Dennis admonished, before easing up on his pal "Okay, let's try this again.."
"WHAAAT?" Dennis' loud shout nearly drowned out the muzak playing in the background of the department store, several shoppers turned their heads in surprise at the sound.
"Sorry, Sonny, we don't sell..*ahem*..gorilla costumes for dogs." The elderly clerk behind the counter said, peering over the tops of his glasses.
"Why, I oughtta.." Dennis said angrily, reaching for the slingshot he kept in his back pocket.
"DENNIS!" Alice, who was standing next to her son, furiously grabbing him by the arm, exclaimed. "I thought I threw that terrible thing away!"
"Guess ya didn't bury it as deep in the trash as ya wanted. It was on the top when I tipped the can over.." Dennis mumbled to himself.
"Come on, young man. We've got your costume, now we're leaving!" Alice said indignantly, slowly pulling Dennis out of the store.
"DOG HATER!" Dennis shouted at the clerk, waving his fist in the air as his mother forcefully pulled through the open door.
"C'mon, boy! Get in the tub!" Dennis grunted as he tried to push Ruff into the large, somewhat rusted washtub in his backyard. Ruff wouldn't budge, however.
Dennis then put his index finger and thumb to his chin as he thought of a solution. He then snapped his fingers as his eyes lit up with inspiration. Dennis then fished into his pocket and pulled out a dog biscuit "Good thing I was savin' this for a snack!" He said aloud, before waving the treat above his head, wiggling it to and fro. "Look, Ruff, a doggie biscuit!" Dennis announced to his pet.
The large, furry dog began to slobber as he stood on his hind legs and began to beg.
Dennis walked to the other side of the tub and said "C'mon, Ruff, get in!" encouragingly.
Without thinking, his mind completely on the treat, Ruff stepped into the tub. When all four legs were completely in the enclosed space, Dennis lowered his hand and stuck the treat outwards. Ruff immediately bit down on the brown, bone shaped biscuit and began to chew with a loud crunching noise, his long furry tail wagging with satisfaction.
"Alright!" Dennis exclaimed as he snatched the bucket of black housepaint that sat beside the tub and turned it upside down, pouring it all over Ruff!
Ruff let out a loud howl of surprise and bolted from the tub, knocking it over. He then rushed inside the house, black paint still dripping from his fur.
"Wait, boy! It's just paint, it won't hurt ya!" Dennis called out to Ruff as he followed him into the house through the back door.
There was silence for several short moments, before the neighborhood was shaken with the sound of Alice shrieking "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! DENNNNNNNNIS MITCHELLLLLLLLLL!"
Dennis stood in his living room, talking to Tommy over the phone. An angry expression on his face.
"Your Mom took away your costume?" Tommy said in shock over the reciever.
"Yeah, I'm not even s'posed ta be on the phone with you. I had ta sneak outta my room when Mom wasn't lookin'." Dennis explained.
"But that means you can't come trick-or-treatin' with us, tonight." Tommy said, his voice starting to deflate in disappointment.
"Heh! That's what you think!" Dennis said with a devilish smile he wished Tommy could've seen.
"What do you mean?" Tommy asked, confused.
"What I mean, Tommy, is that I'm gonna sneak out and go trick-or-treatin' with y'all." Dennis said mischieviously.
"Wow! Really? How?" Tommy asked in awe. "You didn't see her hidin' it, did you?"
"Don't worry 'bout that. It's pro'lly on the top shelf of the lemon closet where she keeps the Christmas presents." Dennis said, before asking "Joey's mom still chaperoning?"
"Yeah." Tommy replied.
"Well, then, I'll meet ya in front of the Wilson's house at six." Dennis said quietly.
Tommy giggled and replied "Gotcha, Dennis." before asking "Hey, Dennis?"
"Yeah, Tommy?" Dennis responded.
"Why do they call it a lemon closet if they only put towels and junk in there?" Tommy asked.
"I dunno. Try ta figger grownups out." Dennis said, rolling his eyes.
Dennis waited until 5:45, when his Mother and Father would be in the den watching television. Without making a sound, he opened his door just enough to sneak out, dressed only in his underwear, his plastic treat bag in his hand. He closed the door behind him, and opened the linen closet door. He set the bag down and hoisted himself up on the bottom shelf and began climbing as if he were scaling Mount Everest, the somewhat weak wooden shelves creaking softly as they just barely held his weight. "Shh! Quiet, you ol' shelves, you're gonna give me away!" Dennis whispered angrily to them.
He then reached the top shelf. Sure enough, his Tarzan loincloth lay in clear view. Dennis took one hand off the shelf's edge to reach for it, only to almost lose his balance, nearly falling backward! Dennis quickly regained his footing, however, and reached again. He managed to get a hold of the costume, then began his slow, careful descent downwards.
Upon reaching the fuzzy, carpeted floor, Dennis donned the loincloth and set the support strap over his left shoulder. He then carefully made his way downstairs, wincing as each step creaked and groaned with the slightest pressure of his weight. However, it apparently wasn't enough to alert his parents, as he reached the bottom without incident.
Walking on his tiptoes, Dennis crept over to the den's entrance where he could just make out the back of his parents' heads as they sat on the couch, their eyes and ears transfixed to the 5:00 Newsman's droning monotone. Dennis spotted Ruff, still black as the night sky, lying next to the couch, facing the entrance. "Here, boy. Here, boy." Dennis softly whispered, being as quiet as he could, waving to Ruff with a smile. Ruff jumped up immediately, wagging his shaggy tail with glee, before lumbering over to Dennis. Henry's head turned to follow Ruff for a minute, before returning to the news program.
"We still buddies?" Dennis asked in a hushed tone, as he vigorously petted Ruff atop his fuzzy hair. "C'mon, boy! We're goin' Trick-or-treatin'!" Dennis said quietly before walking over to the front door, cautiously turning the handle and opening it. Dennis and Ruff then walked out of the house, before Dennis turned and took hold of the handle, closing it as quietly as he could. Dennis then said to Ruff with a sigh of relief "Whew! That sure was a close one, huh, boy?" Before beginning to trot over next door to the Wilson's
Sure enough, Mrs. McDonald and the rest of the kids were standing there in their costumes, talking amongst each other.
"Hiya, everyone!" Dennis gleefully announced!
Various sparse greeting were returned.
Just then, Dennis noticed something, turning to Tommy. "Tommy, why're you dressed like Barney? I thought you was goin' as Fred." He asked, astoished.
"They was all out of Fred costumes, this was all they had." Tommy answered in a disappointed voice through his mask.
"Oh, well. That's the way the Flintstone crumbles, I guess." Dennis responded with a smirk
Suddenly, Mrs. McDonald's eyes bugged open behind her glasses at the sight of Dennis' face. "Dennis! What happened to your eye?" she said aloud in surprise.
"Ah, jus' a lil' baseball accdidnent!" Dennis said with a smile, pointing to his black eye.
"Hahaha! Looks like Tarzan forgot Jane's anniversary!" Margaret, dressed in an old looking dress, a grey wig done up in a bun and granny glasses, announced as she pointed and laughed.
"Margaret! That's not very nice, dear!" Mrs. McDonald scolded.
"Who the heck're you s'posed to be? The farmer's wife in that paintin'?" Dennis asked, folding his chubby arms across his chest. This prompted a smattering of giggles from the rest of the kids.
"Very funny!" Margaret said scornfully, before explaining "I'm Susan B. Anthony, an early crusader for women's rights!" with an air of self-importance.
Dennis feigned a yawn, and said derisively "Whatever. Schooltime's over, Margaret. Time to get some candy!"
The rest of the kids cheered as Margaret grimaced angrily at Dennis.
"Alright, children, I'll be waiting at the end of the driveway for you." Mrs. McDonald stated, as the children walked up the steps of the Wilson house. "I'll watch your dog for you, Dennis." She called out, holding onto Ruff's collar as Dennis turned and nodded.
Tommy turned to Dennis and said through his plastic mask "Y'know, Dennis, Ruff kinda does look like Cheetah with all that paint on him."
"Yeah, at least it's cheaper'n buyin' him a costume." Dennis answered.
Gina, being the tallest, leaned up in the cowgirl boots she wore beneath her Lady Liberty robe, and rang the doorbell.
Almost immediately, Mrs. Wilson opened the door with a big smile on her face, the always grumpy frowning behind her.
"Trick-or-Treat!" The children announced collectively, holding open their bags.
"Oh, don't you all look lovely!" Mrs. Wilson said warmly as she began to drop assorted candies into the plastic bags.
"Lovely enough to be in a freakshow.." Mr. Wilson grunted.
"Really now, George!" Mrs. Wilson said, turning at Mr. Wilson with an angry expression, before turning back to the children and gasping. "Dennis, what happened to your eye, dearie?"
"It's alright, Mrs. Wilson. Just got beaned while playin' catch is all!" Dennis reassured her.
"Well, how about something extra to make you feel better?" Mrs. Wilson asked, before reaching into the candy bowl again and pulling out another small candy bar and placing it into Dennis' sack. "You children have fun, now!" Mrs. Wilson said, smiling again.
"And don't come back 'til next year." Mr. Wilson grumbled.
"George!" Mrs. Wilson said in a reprimanding voice, as Mr. Wilson closed the door.
As the children made their way down the porch, Dennis could already feel the other kids glaring at him.
"That wasn't fair, Dennis." Dewey said behind his green, bug eyed, martian mask.
"Si, that black eye get'a you da sympat'y." Gina said, pushing her pointy crown further back on her head.
"Well, whose fault was it that I got hit?" Dennis shot back.
Gina bit her bottom lip in frustration and muttered to herself "Scossa.."
"What'd ya want me to say? "No thanks?"" Dennis asked in frustration.
"Yeah, 'least you wouldn't have more than us!" Tommy said angrily.
"I wan' an extra candy bar too!" Wailed Joey, who was dressed like a monkey, tears beginning to form in his eyes.
"For goodness sakes, Joey, stop crying!" Margaret groaned.
"Hold on, guys. I got an idea on how we can all get extra candy!" Dennis said, turning to face the rest of the kids.
"Oh yeah? Well, tell us, Dennis.." Dewey said impatiently.
"An' it better work!" Gina said, furrowing her brows and raising her fist.
Dennis chuckled nervously to himself, before saying "Okay, everybody, here's what we do."
As the door to the house opened, Dennis and his pals once again held out their bags and shouted "Trick-or-Treat!"
The middle aged man with brown hair and a bushy moustache was somewhat taken aback. All of the children, incuding the ones with their masks pulled up, seemed to have a black eye! "Whoa! What happened to your eyes, kids?" The man asked in a concerned voice.
Dennis smiled and merrily replied "We're from the Children with Black Eyes charity. We require an extra piece of candy each for all of them kids with black eyes like us."
The man simply bowed his head and began chuckling to himself before looking at them again and shrugging, saying "Sorry, kids, I already gave all of my extra candy to the Children with Missing Teeth charity." in an apologetic voice, with a shrug of his shoulders.
After Dennis and company had recieved their candy, the rest of the kids turned to him, furious once again. "I thought this was gonna get us some candy, Dennis!" Tommy said in a frustrated voice.
"I can't believe I listened to you when you said, "Let's all put mud on our eyes!"" Margaret indignantly stated. "Dennis Mitchell, you're a liar!"
"Si, you give Lady Liberty a black eye for not'ing!" Gina said aggresively, clenching her teeth and rolling up her sleeves. "I fix you good!"
"I say we all fix 'im!" Dewey agreed, as the group of angry kids began to advance towards Dennis.
"Hey, guys, come on now.." Dennis said, putting up his hands defensively.
Suddenly there came the familiar shout of "DENNIS MITCHELL!"
"Oh, no.." Dennis said with a sense of fear, his eyes wide open, as both of Dennis' parents came marching towards him.
As Alice approached Dennis first, she began to fume "Dennis, we absolutely forbade you from going Trick-or-Treating tonight, and you disobeyed us again! What do you have to say for yourself?" with a wrathful expression.
Dennis paused for a moment, looking this way and that, before saying evasively "Later, guys!" to his friends before darting off!
"Dennis, you get back here!" Henry called out as the two gave chase.
"Let's go, Ruff!" Dennis called out to his dog, rushing past a confused and petrified Mrs. McDonald, and hopping onto Ruff's back. Ruff immediately took off down the street at a fast pace, with Dennis letting out a squeaky rendition of the Tarzan yell, both of his parents racing after him like angry natives. It gave his friends quite a show.
All of Dennis' pals, save for Margaret, adopted amused smiles as they watched the spectacle.
"Go get 'em, Tarzan!" Tommy shouted, cupping his hands around his mouth.
"Woo-Hoo! What a show!" Dewey chuckled.
"Thanks'a for de act, Paisano!" Gina called out.
Joey giggled and clapped his hands, lisping elatedly "Dennith is funny!"
"Good riddance." Margaret said with an annoyed expression.
The next day, Dennis was back inside his house, talking to Gina over the phone. "Did you have fun after I left, Gina?" he asked.
"Oh, si!" Gina replied giddily. "Every house we go to, de people ask about you. Dey ask, "Who da little boy who ridah de black dog?" And I say, "He's a my Paisano, Dennis!" Before changing her tone to one of curiosity "Say, what happen to Ruff, anyway?"
"Oh, he got the paint washed offa him, an' now he's in tha doghouse outside." Dennis replied.
"Oh." Gina answered, before asking "You get punished too?"
"Yeah, Mom an' Dad took my costume back to the store, took away my candy an' made me sit in tha corner." Dennis explained. ". But since Daddy shaved off his moustache, him and Mom've been cuddlin' up more often, that's why they probably don't know I'm not there right now."
"That'sa too bad they take your treats away.." Gina said in a sympethetic voice.
"Not really." Dennis answered.
"Huh? What you mean?" Gina asked, confused.
"Y'know what the best part a' wearin' a loincloth is?" Dennis asked.
"No, what?" Gina replied.
"You can hide stuff innit an' your Mom an' Dad won't bother searchin' it." Dennis answered slyly, before taking a handful of small gumdrops from his overalls pocket and stuffing them into his mouth with a sound of satisfaction.
THE END
