Ice Cream Cake and Three Forks/ A Tale of Two Ms. Scottson's

Summary: When Valerie Scottson comes over with an effervescent bath bomb Nancy can't help but remember how hot the blonde was, or how she had a thing for blondes. She wanted a woman that night. And there was no one there to stop her.

It was at Nancy's house and she was arranging business as usual. Then the doorbell rang, not usual.

"What am I doing here. Umm. I wanted to apologize to you for acting like an asshole"

"No, that was fair I did stalk you"

"Tim's in the car. I got your address from the mammogram papers drove over drove by the house a few times your neighbor on the corner is really into gnomes huh"

"Did you call before and hang up"

"Twice"

"Crazy stalker person"

"Call it even"

"No I'm having you arrested restraining order the whole thing"

"Little shit"

"Alright Look i got you this its a bath bomb effervescent my advice is to let it bubble between your legs the carbonation effect its really enjoyable and it smells nice."

"Thanks that's-"

"Look just take it im an over gifter no big deal"

"Oh well , I'm going to go"

"Thanks for the bath thing"

"Oh and your boobs are fine, benign. Fine and benign.

Aren't you glad i'm not a proctologist"

"Where you have short fingernails but a lot of anger so"

"Okay Well i'm going to go slap my kid and take him to the shrink"

"Hey are you free for dinner tomorrow?"


"Fucking rolling blackouts"

"Planets overpopulated resources are running out the world is doomed"

"More wine"

"Oh god yeah"

"I have to sit down"

"When shane was little he called the stars up aboves"

"I miss the simplicity of toddlerhood"

"Amen to that"

"Im failing my children"

"O god who isn't"

"Yeah tims kind of a dickhead"

"Fuck you i love my son"

"Oh sorry of course you do"

"I love my dikhead son"

"I have ice cream cake"

"Oh i want cake"

"Give me cake give me cake"

"Someone's yelling people are sleeping"

"How drunk are we"

"We're not drunk andy"

"Lubricated"

"That the technical term"

"You got a problem with that"

"No maam"

He called me ma'am

"Get him Val get him"

"You think i'm a maam flashes"

"You are definitely not a ma'am no maam"

"I'm getting cake and three forks and no one can stop me"

"Thank you"

"You getting up"

"No im fine down here"

"You like her"

"She's ah"

"Who is she"

"She's my new friend"

"Bout time you got a friend"

"Oh not nice andy, not a nice thing to say"

"How do you know her"

"She's peters ex wife"

"Im sorry nance are you fucking insane"

"Do you like her Andy"

"I think the question here is.. Do YOU like her"

"What well she seems like a good friend"

"Cut the shit Nance"

"What shit Andy"

"Bullshit, she's totally you're type"

"What i'm not.. I mean I'm ok with people who are… but I'm not not I don't…

"You're rambling. And I think you do."

"What what's my type then you're full of shit."

"Hot blondes. Bitchy. Bossy. MILFS."

"You're making that up. "

"No i'm not Nance what you think I don't see things you and Celia are fighting right now and you bring some blonde thing over for dinner. Who do you think I am. And Celia 's… yeah they're both bitches."

"But you hit on her too. "

"She's think I was gay if I didn't. I promise I won't steal her on you. I gave you Cilia"

"Wait what happened between you and Cilia"

"She kissed me once, at Shane's graduation party"

"Did you like it"

"Not bad, do you like it"

"I miss women. They're soft, emotional, powerful. "

"Better than men ?"

"No I still like men. But I need to fuck women too, there's just something about them. They make me feel so good. With men it's all about them but with women… they just appreciate your body so much more."

"You're fucking insane because she's peter's ex wife. But go get her tiger. You have it in you."

"You don't mind if I fuck women."

"Fuck no that shit's hot Nancy pants."

"Oh god, just leave me alone this is not your porn show. "

Everyone goes to bed.


"So you have experience… with the ladies Val."

"So do you."

"I never confirmed nor denied that."

"You didn't need too my gaydar's awesome. And you want me. I could tell when I first met you."

"Bullshit."

"Are you kidding, you drew me in pencil and showed your boobs off."

"You're a mammogram specialist."

"You could have booked a consultation."

"Guess I didn't want to wait did I."

"Do you have a lesbian lover Nancy ?"

"We're going through a rough patch right now."

"So, yes."

"Yes I fuck women too can we please move on."

"Do you think i'm hot."

"Yes, I do think you're hot"

"Do you wanna fuck me"

"Oh god I do want to fuck you."

"Tough shit Nancy, I'm going to fuck YOU"

"Top girl, are you"

"I dare you to touch my pants"

"There I touched your pants"

"Not my ankle", she says grabbing Nancy's wrist and placing it over her zipper.

Nancy felt a huge bulge in her pants and she was intrigued

:Val, you don't have a… penis do you ? That would be a bit weird."

"Why don't you find out"

Val moves Nancy's hands to her belt and Nancy undoes the clasp and slides the belt over. She undoes the zipper in one swoop and undoes the button.

Nancy peeks at a jet blue boxer with a thick red strap and its so hot on a woman. She pulls at the strap with one finger and reveals a bright blue strap on.

"Wow Val, look what you're packing down there."

"You ever done strap on Nancy"

"No."

"Do you want it."

"Yeah, I want it."

"Safe word Nancy?"

"Frantarkenton" She blushes

"What the fuck?"

"Long story"

"Whatever" Valerie shrugs.

"You want it"

"Then you're gonna get it, bitch"

Valerie pushes Nancy's pants down and her panties and pulls out her strap on. She slams Nancy against the counter forcing Nancy to hold on to the cupboards. Valerie takes off her belt and uses it to slap Nancy in the ass. She puts a condom on herself.

Nancy moans into the touch. She loves being spanked and hit and fucked against tables and counters.

Valerie penetrates Nancy in her vagina from behind without even taking her pants off. She thrusts inside Nancy forcefully. She digs her nails into Nancy's back, hard so it leaves marks.

Valerie slides her arm around Nancy's neck so she's holding the other shoulder. She uses her weight to peg Nancy hard. Nancy whimpers at the contact gripping the counter tighter and closing her eyes.

Valerie contacts her arm slightly to be tightening Nancy's air supply but just barely. Nancy feels like she's floating.

Valerie pumps in and out faster. "I'm going to come Val" Nancy moans out.

"I'm going to come" She repeats, feeling herself starting to contract.

"Well hold you cum, I'm not done with you yet I'm going to finish first". The strap on was stimulating her hard on her clit and Valerie was on the brink herself.

"I can't, I'm going to come any second now I'm so close" Nancy moaned helplessly. "Count to ten, Nance, you're not allowed to come yet"

"Ten" Nancy grips the counter and squeezes her walls to try to fight the onslaught of waves approaching.

"Nine" Valerie slows down her movements but penetrates deeper and all the way out.

"Eight" Nancy's breathing becomes ragged and shallow and she's wiggling her hips.

"Seven" Valerie's about to climax so she pushes herself to orgasm. She clenches up and feels contractions wave through her and rolls her eyes back.

"Six" Val continues thrusting through her orgasm.

"Five" "I can't hold - on" Nancy is struggling as she clenches her walls but the fluid wants to release and she's contracting on her own now.

"Four" Nancy feels her orgasm growing bigger the more she edges herself.

"Three" Nancy loves to feel full and the toy is making her more and more wet.

"Two" Nancy can't hold on anymore. Val reaches around and fingers Nancy's clit and she catapults over the edge so fast she passes out momentarily and falls into Valerie's arms. Valerie hit her G-spot at the same time and she erupts like a volcano all over herself with cum dripping onto the floor. She feels the aftershocks as she crumbles into Valerie who holds Nancy with her strong body.

Valerie cradles her while Nancy turns and kisses the side of Nancy's neck and cups her head to Valerie's shoulders.

"You're so strong Val" Nancy appreciates. She likes curvy women.

"You can take it a lot more than you look" Val is genuinely surprised. "I'm a dancer" Nancy adds and this explains it all.

Val doesn't pull out so Nancy still feels pressure building between her legs. She still aches and wants more.

"You didn't wait till one" Val raises an eyebrow at Nancy.

"I - I couldn't wait" Nancy says helplessly.

"I'm going to punish you for that" Valerie husks.

Valerie carries Nancy to her bedroom and pulls out of her pocket a set of handcuffs. She pushes Nancy onto the bed and grabs her wrist. She takes it and cuffs it to the bedpost, then repeats it with the other wrist.

Valerie continues in missionary and finally strips Nancy. She takes off her top and bra and pants. Nancy takes Val's top off.

Val sucks Nancy's breasts hard then bites darn hard on them. She bites to Nancy's neck, sucks the side of it. She bites her shoulders and nibbles the ears until Nancy cries out.

Val bites down the stomach and sides, growling at her. Nancy wants to reach down but she's pulling against the handcuffs and rattling the bed.

Val seals their lips together and its searing. They have already done it and this is the first time they kiss. Nancy moans into the kiss as Val bites her upper lip and her bottom lip. She sticks her tongue in hard and thrusts not letting Nancy have any dominance.

She sucks Nancy's neck on her pulse point and it drives Nancy wild. She comes again with Val and collapses onto her back.

Valerie uncuffs Nancy and Nancy has her hands all over Val, running up her breasts and her waist with her palms.

"I want you on your knees, I like it doggie style ya animal" Val flips Nancy like a Pancake and she nails her to the bed. Nancy can only writhe like a puppet as she holds her own breasts while Valerie penetrates her again. When she finishes Valerie finally pulls out of Nancy and Nancy collapses, exhausted. Valerie sits on her back and massages her neck and shoulders.

"Will you… do me" Valerie asks in a suddenly submissive tone.

Seizing the opportunity Nancy switches the condoms and straps on the toy. She goes to mount Valerie but Val flips her onto her back again.

"I'm the top, bitch" Valerie puts all of her weight onto Nancy. She's much bigger and Nancy likes the pressure.

Valerie lowers herself onto the strap on and pleasures herself in cowgirl. She rides Nancy while sucking and massaging Nancy's breasts and having Nancy suck her puts her hand on Valerie's wasit and waits as Val fucks herself. Nancy rolls her hips as she feels how the toy is stimulating. She climaxes first and then Valerien Comes and slides out to hug Nancy from the top. Val cradles her and brushes Nancy's hair from her face.

"Do you need any aftercare Nancy" Valerie is a gentleman.

"I could use a bath" Nancy laughs.

"I thought you would never ask". Nancy runs a bath while Valerie cleans up the toy and the bed. She pockets the handcuffs and goes to make out with Nancy again.

"I'm not really a, get her wasted and fuck her on the first date girl… stalker"

"You are so like that. Why else would you bring me over a bath bomb and tell me to put it between my legs"

"Guilty as charged"

"And yet you're arresting me"

"You're a great lay Nancy, what can I say"

"And you have short fingernails, and a lot of anger"

"Someone was checking me out"

They get in the bath and Valerie holds the bath bomb between Nancy's thighs. She understands why it feels so good. Nancy pushes the showerhead between Valerie's legs till she comes and Val does the same for Nancy.

Valerie takes Nancy into her arms to kiss her neck. Nancy relaxes onto Valerie's shoulder.

"God I miss women"

"So much smarter"

"You're so much hotter than peter" Nancy admits

"You're so much hotter than Helen Chin" Valerie laughs.

"Holy shit she is such a homewrecker that tennis pro"

"Wait, she was with your girl's husband wasn't she"

"You knew about that too?"

"I had my suspicions, you just confirmed them"

"God."

"You miss her, don't you. You miss Celia "

"You're an awesome lay Val, don't get me wrong. And I'd still fuck you, if she was ok with it."

"Did you tell peter you were with Celia "

"Oh god no. We weren't that close, it was business"

"Yeah he's not cool with it"

"Figured"

"You didn't answer, you miss her don't you"

"I do. Fucked it all up bad, but part of me still wants her. I don't know if I love her, but we're friends and a little more"

"Amen to that"

"What about your fuckhead son, he ok with you fucking women"

"He's not going to find out"

"My kids won't either. Andy knows"

"Oh hell Andy knows you. He loves you"

"Does not"

"Does too"

"You're a heartbreaker"

"I guess I am"

"Wanna fool around"

"Yeah. "

So they get out of the bath and have some sex and cuddles. And Nancy decides that its better they met than not at all.

Little did she know what the D.E.A had coming for her.