Author's Note:) Yay! I finally got a fanfiction account. Hugs all around! I decided to slowly transfer my deviantART posts to here. This was the first fanfiction I've ever published, so it's suffering from beginner's syndrome. XD. Anyways, this is not my total first fanfiction. I've found my old notebook from around three years ago and I've found the first fanfic I've ever wrote down. It wasn't that bad, save for the lackluster details and slightly off spelling. In fact, it can be saved and salvaged.
So, now, read with caution.
I hate how much I love you.
I sat on the tiny chair. Sketch book in left hand, pencil in right. I would put the pencil to paper, but nothing would happen. No movement. Not even a single line would be drawn. Then I would remove the pencil from the paper, and I'd at point one again. I needed to fix Sora's memories. But how could I with him, the subject of my affections, standing right behind me?
At least he didn't know about how I felt. He hates me. I could see it in his ice cold eyes. But I loved him, so much that I hate it. Hatred was something we both shared, nothing else.
I hate how much I love him.
And his name was Roxas. He was the splitting image of Sora. But I could only guess this, due to the fact that he hides his face under the hood of his long black coat. I never exactly knew why he hides his face, and I was afraid to ask. If I were to see what he looked like, I would draw him and keep the picture forever. I wanted to draw what I see right now, but he was standing behind me, watching my every move.
Roxas put his hand softly on my shoulder. A chill went down my spine. I always worried whenever he touched me. Would he be soft and gentle? Or rough and harsh enough to leave a black and blue bruise? I wouldn't be able to tell.
I gave up on drawing something and put down the sketch pad on the white table in front of me. I leaned into my chair a little. I heard Roxas' calm breathing in my ear.
"Give up?" he whispered.
"Yes," I admitted shamefully. I sighed in defeat, and stood up. I loved it when Roxas was calm. I enjoyed it. I didn't want to ruin it, but I needed to ask him a certain question.
"Roxas," I said as I turned towards him. His icy but serene eyes stared into mine. "Why do you keep your hood up all the time?" I crossed my fingers behind my back, hoping he wouldn't get angry.
He turned his head away from me. "Because I hate the way I look,"
"Oh," I looked down and let the subject drop. Roxas looked outside the window of the pure white room. It was totally dark outside. He went to leave. I didn't want him to. I swiftly grabbed his arm. "Wait," I pleaded.
"What?" he asked coldly.
"Don't leave… yet," I pulled at his arm.
Roxas sighed annoyingly. He turned around to face me. "Alright," he said. My eyes lit up. "But," What? Was there something I had to do in return? He leaned in and whispered in my ear. "…Only because I'm selfish,"
Was it me that was driving him away? I had the feeling that he wants to stay here for as long as he wants. He went over to a corner of the room and sat down on the floor. I saw his eyes close. He was asleep within a matter of minutes.
Suddenly, inspiration struck me as I watched him sleep. I grabbed my sketch pad and started drawing.
A few hours passed, and I was almost done coloring the picture. I just had to finish Roxas' eyes. Done. I put down the sapphire blue pencil. I looked at what I'd drawn, smiling. I then turned my attention to the figure clad in black in the corner. I grew ever so desperate to see what he was hiding under that black hood. It would be dangerous and stupid of me to remove his hood.I have tried to do it once, and I got a broken wrist. I decided to take one for the team, meaning me. I quietly walked over to Roxas. I got on my knees. His chest rose up and down with each breath he took. I took a deep breath and removed his hood.
I gasped. He was… beautiful. His heart-shaped face complemented his pale skin. His hair was blond and spiky. I stared in awe.
"You're beautiful," I whispered.
Big mistake.
Roxas' eyes snapped open. He stared at then felt his head and pulled up his hood. His eyes turned even colder with anger. I stood up quickly before he could grab me, but he was faster than me and he got up and pushed me against the wall. Roxas gripped my shoulders, hard.
"Say that again, Naminé," he said with a cold, ruthless tone.
"You're beautiful," I said again. He gripped my shoulders tighter.
"Liar,"
"It's true," I whimpered a little as he sent more pain through my shoulders. I felt like he was trying to get a confession out of me. As he stared at me with cold eyes, I couldn't help but notice how they remind me of the night. A dark blue sky with shining stars. "I like you," Okay, that was a lie. I yelped in pain. It was getting to be too much. Almost silently, I said "I hate how much I love you,"
His grip tightened more. "What?" he asked.
I had to tell him. "I hate how much I love you!" Then I kissed him.
The kiss only lasted for five seconds. As I pulled away, Roxas stared with wide eyes. I noticed that he released my shoulders completely. They throbbed with pain.
"You…" he said. "You love me?"
"Yes," I responded. "I love you too much, that I hate it,"
His eyes softened. I put my arms around him and hugged him. He hugged back.
"I think… I'm in love with you, Naminé," he whispered in my ear. Butterflies started flying around in my stomach. What was this? I thought Nobodies couldn't feel. But… they might be wrong.
Was he telling the truth? I could not tell. "Liar," I said.
Roxas took a step back, his eyes still soft. For the first time, I saw him smile. "Silly Naminé," his smile turned into a smirk. He leaned in closer. "I'm not lying," Our noses touched. The butterflies were getting worse. "I like that drawing, by the way,"
How could he have seen it? I felt my face heat up in embarrassment. "You're cute when you blush," he said, just as I thought he couldn't make feel even more embarrassed.
He then pressed his lips softly against mine. It felt so sweet, yet passionate at the same time. Our lips moved against each other in perfect harmony like a symphony. It went on for a long time. Maybe forever, but we'll never know. Because…
"I love how much I love you,"
