Lincoln's Cystic Acne
By Joe
Summary: Lincoln tries to avoid being disowned for his secret cystic acne before a water park vacation.
Author Notes: I do not own The Loud House, its characters, or any other copyrighted material. I wrote this solely for entertainment purposes and not to make a profit.
Chapter 1
It was a sunny Saturday morning in early June – the first day of summer for the Loud kids. As they woke up, they were all very excited and happy – eager to start enjoying their three-month vacation from school – that is, all the Loud kids except Lincoln. Normally, Lincoln, like his sisters, was thrilled at the idea of summer vacation. He would spend hours reading Ace Savvy comics, watching ARGGH! with his best friend Clyde McBride, and on the years when the family could afford it, go on a summer vacation. However, Lincoln was in a very sour mood as this summer began. He waited for his siblings to finish using the bathroom, and finally, once the upstairs was silent – indicating that the coast was clear, he left his closet bedroom for the bathroom and locked the door.
Lincoln looked in the mirror, and his pale face and hair stared back at him. His pale complexion and bags under his eyes made him look really depressed, but he otherwise looked okay. He then reluctantly unbuttoned his orange pajama top and opened it up. A whimper escaped Lincoln's throat as he stared in horror at his chest. What appeared to be hundreds of bright-red pimples clearly contrasted with Lincoln's pale white chest. He even had several large cysts – and some pimples had even started migrating down to his stomach. His stomach! Whoever got acne on their stomach of all places? Lincoln turned around, pulled down his pajama top, and looked at his back, which had countless dark red scabs, giant red cysts, and small pink pimples. His back – and even his chest and stomach – looked like a disgusting pizza.
Lincoln whimpered again as he buttoned up his pajama top. He felt both helpless and enraged. His newest acne medication was yet another miserable failure! Not only had it not worked, but Lincoln seemed to get more pimples – and in really weird places. Lincoln just wanted to take a sledgehammer and smash the bathroom sink in fury. He had tried countless acne medications, and NOTHING had worked. It was so unfair – especially since he had such severe, incurable acne at only ELEVEN years of age.
Lincoln sighed and then trudged back down the hall to his bedroom – where he changed clothes – avoiding looking at his pimply chest and stomach in the process, of course. Lincoln put on his typical orange shirt and blue jeans – and then sulked as he went down the stairs to join his family. As he descended the stairs, he saw his three oldest sisters, Lori, Leni, and Luna – aged seventeen, sixteen, and fifteen respectively, sitting on the couch in the living room – either watching TV or using their smartphones. He then heard six-year-old pageant queen Lola's ear-piercing scream as she ran across the living room – chased by her twin sister Lana, who was carrying a slimy frog. This briefly caught the attention of Lori, Leni, and Luna – until both Lola and Lana raced out the front door. Many days were like this in the Loud House, so it wasn't anything that needed particular attention. Lincoln also saw something moving in the fireplace, and he figured it was eight-year-old goth Lucy, who loved to hang out in dark places.
Once downstairs, Lincoln quietly made his way to the kitchen – not in the mood for interacting with any of his sisters. Of course, avoiding all his ten sisters was always hard. Indeed, Lincoln saw his remaining sisters, Luan, Lynn, Lisa, and Lily – aged fourteen, thirteen, four, and one respectively, in the kitchen. Lynn, Lisa, and Lily were sitting at the kitchen table, while Luan was at the kitchen sink – rinsing a cheese grater.
"Good morning, Lincoln!" Luan greeted cheerfully. "Isn't the first day of summer really GRATE?" Luan laughed, "Hahahahahahaha! Get it?"
Lincoln sighed in annoyance but said, "Yep, it sure is, Luan." Lincoln reached up to the top of the refrigerator, grabbed a box of Zombie Bran, and fixed himself a bowl of the cereal and a glass of orange juice. He put the cereal box back on top of the refrigerator – and then sat down with his sisters to eat.
"So, Linc, what are your plans for the summer?" Lynn asked – taking a bite of bacon from her plate. At that point, Luan joined the others at the table and started eating her cheddar waffle sandwich.
Lincoln shrugged as he took a spoonful of cereal. "I dunno. Probably going to read comics, ride bikes, and do a bunch of other stuff," he said.
"Make sure you don't have anything scheduled a month from now," Lisa said after finishing her toast. "Our parental units are going to take us on a vacation then!"
"All right!" Lincoln said excitedly – feeling better. Last summer, the Louds didn't have enough money to go on a summer vacation, so it was great that they apparently could afford one this year. "Any ideas where we're going?"
"I suggested that we go to AQUAverse, and everyone seems to like the idea. It's this really cool water park with gigantic water slides, flowriding, and Olympic-size pools where I could train in – it's SO rad!" Lynn said – enthusiasm evident by her voice, bulging eyes, and huge grin on her face. "What do you think?"
Lincoln's mood soured again. Normally, he would be enthused by going to a water park, but since he had developed horrible cystic acne over the past year, he wasn't sure that exposing his acne-ridden skin to the public and his unknowing sisters was such a great idea. However, the smiles on his other sisters' faces indicated that they were just as excited to go to the water park as Lynn was. He couldn't give a clear "yes" or "no" answer.
"Uh…gee, I don't know, Lynn. I'll have to think about it," Lincoln said apprehensively.
"Oh. Alright," Lynn said flatly – taking another bite of bacon. She was clearly taken aback since she was now staring at Lincoln as if he were turning into a tree.
As Luan spoon-fed some applesauce to Lily, Lincoln started to rest his head on his hands – but he didn't want to look overly sad or worried, so he ate his cereal as normal. As he ate, he worried about the prospect of going to AQUAverse. His skin was incredibly gross, and to make matters worse, he doubted that the park would allow him to wear a shirt – given that he had been to many public pools that forbid people from wearing shirts in the water.
Despite having horrible acne on his back, chest, and stomach, he hadn't told his sisters. Partly, it was due to the fact that it was not visible to them – and thus wasn't even their business, anyway. However, it also was due to obviously being an extremely gross and embarrassing problem. If he had some mild acne, that would have been one thing, but he had hundreds of giant, pus-filled, and crusty zits all over his skin. Even he felt disgusted by it, and he imagined that most other people would be, as well. The only other people in the Loud House to know about Lincoln's problem were, of course, his parents, who kept his problem confidential – and had been taking him to a dermatologist over the course of several months. Unfortunately, none of the treatments that Lincoln had received seemed to work, and his acne was even spreading. Lincoln was more and more frustrated. He felt that he might have to tell his sisters about his problem. Although they fought a lot, they were all one big, happy family and loved and cared about each other. Surely, they would still accept Lincoln – even if he had disgusting acne – wouldn't they?
"UGH! I AM SO DONE WITH BOBBY!" Lori's angry voice suddenly pierced through Lincoln's head. He jerked his head upward – curious to hear more about his sister's normally beloved boyfriend. "DON'T EVER REMIND ME OF HIM, LENI!"
"What's wrong with him?" Leni asked innocently.
"So, I saw him mowing the grass at his house yesterday evening, right?" Lori started. "Then, all of a sudden, he takes off his sweaty shirt, and there are LITERALLY hundreds of giant red zits on his back!"
"EWW!" Leni and Luna exclaimed together – sounding disgusted. Lincoln felt deeply hurt by the girls' reaction.
"I know, right?" Lori agreed. "It was SO disgusting. I almost threw up right then and there. As I walked home, I texted him and told him that we're through."
"I don't blame you, dude. I'd never date someone so disgusting," Luna said. As Lincoln heard that, his face grew tense.
"Yeah," Lori said. "I can't believe I was ever actually IN LOVE with him! Ugh…! If I had known that he was so filthy and gross, I never would have dated that loser in the first place!"
Lincoln felt tears welling up in his eyes – especially as he heard both Leni and Luna voice their wholehearted agreement with Lori. His spoon clinked against his cereal bowl as he suddenly stood up and walked out of the kitchen.
"Hey, Linc, where ya going?" Luan asked. However, Lincoln had already left and didn't answer.
"Poo poo!" Lily suddenly exclaimed from her high chair – drawing surprised glances from Luan, Lynn, and Lisa.
As Lincoln approached the stairs, he felt on the verge of sobbing hysterically, so he ran upstairs to avoid catching the attention of his sisters in the living room. Once in his room, Lincoln closed and locked the door, threw himself on the bed, and cried his eyes out into his pillow. He couldn't believe that his sisters were so heartless and insensitive. He thought that they were nicer people than that. Based on their reactions to Bobby's acne, Lincoln's worst fears were confirmed: his sisters would be incredibly grossed out by his own acne, and they would likely bully and disown him – the sisters whom he thought loved him unconditionally.
Lincoln squealed and trembled – feeling absolutely hopeless. How could he cure his acne in time for the family's trip to AQUAverse? It seemed futile since even a licensed, professional dermatologist, over the course of many months, failed to cure his acne – even with powerful prescription drugs. On top of that, his oldest sisters were so uncaring and unsympathetic, and the family seemed eager to go on this vacation. Lincoln was in a terrible quandary. It seemed there was no way out for Lincoln. He clutched his stuffed rabbit, Bun-Bun, curled into a fetal position, and felt more warm tears run down his face.
After about thirty minutes, Lincoln had calmed down and was now lying on his back in bed – with Bun-Bun tucked under his right arm. Maybe this wasn't the end of the world. Maybe, somehow, it was all a big misunderstanding – as unlikely as that seemed. Maybe Lincoln's acne medications would finally kick in before the vacation. Maybe Lincoln could persuade his sisters to accept Bobby's and his condition. Maybe Lincoln could convince his parents and siblings to go somewhere else for vacation. Or maybe Lincoln could even cure his own acne.
"Yeah, that's a possibility," Lincoln said – smiling a little and sitting up in bed – growing more hopeful as he thought about curing his own acne. He had heard stories of people with various medical problems who were unable to cure their problems with conventional, professional medical treatments – but were able to cure them with non-conventional treatments. Sure, he had heard that many of those things were quite possibly pseudoscience, but he figured that he had nothing to lose – seeing as how his prescribed medications hadn't improved his acne whatsoever.
Whatever the case, even if Lincoln couldn't cure his acne himself, he had other options to prevent his sisters – and the general public – from finding out about it. Lincoln lay back on his bed and sighed. Maybe things weren't hopeless after all. Then again, his options weren't guaranteed to work, either. A substantial amount of uncertainty still lingered, and when Lincoln thought back to how gross his back, chest, and stomach looked – and how his acne had actually been spreading – and how his sisters were repulsed by Bobby's similar condition, he felt tension in his chest. All of a sudden, his brief sense of hope had been diminished.
It was a long shot, but Lincoln had to do something – anything – to keep his sisters from finding out about his acne. Based on their reaction to Bobby's acne, they could very well bully and disown him, too, which made Lincoln curl back into a fetal position, grab Bun-Bun, and start crying again.
