Disclaimer: Nope, don't own Tekken.
Author's Note: Ignore this. This is a high, high high need to vent. If the character is out of character, then it's clear that it's me coming through, like it was in "Listen". I hate doing this. I really hate venting through my writing, especially like this, because writing is my hobby and my tool for a story, not for what's happening to me. Not as a last resort like this. Short because I want it to be. If you've read it and still don't get it, here: Jinpachi's thoughts during and slightly after the battle of Hon-Maru. Kk. Dunno why you've read it/are reading it but meh. Enjoy regardless.
OUT OF CONTROL
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
It is infectious and poisonous, and it claws through the system, choking everything within. Some call it anger, some call it abhorrence, while others simply attempt to abolish the feeling, deeming it unimportant, because they cannot harness it and bend it to their will. Whether they inject themselves with a temporary antidote or ignore it, they cannot change it. To some, it is an escape to a new world or a new dimension, where their problems of now are invisible, and to others… it is a demon. Fitting that I should see it as both.
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
It is strong and tough, and it chains down the system, binding everything within. Some call it unavoidable, some call it necessary, while others only endeavour to eradicate the emotion, deeming it more harmful than helpful, because they do not understand it and are too frightened to face it. Whether they find the keys to freedom or just adapt to the new weight, it is still there. To some, it is a form of protection or a safeguard, because they are being shielded and distracted from their problems, and to others… it is a curse. Fitting that I should see it as both.
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
It is dwelling and dormant, and it cascades around the system, drowning everything within. Some call it empowering, some call it relieving, whilst others merely manage the mood, because they cannot afford to allow it to peek out from underneath the rug. Whether they keep their heads above the water or just adapt to the new environment, it is still pouring down. To some, it is a welcome switch or a new challenge, because it is just so different, and to others, it is unwanted… because they cannot swim. Fitting that I should see it as both.
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
Its poison wrapped through my body, pushing down everything human. Despite all of the fighting I do, I cannot change it because I am without an antidote nor a strengthened will. It is strong, having broken the former shell of myself, and the chains still hold me in the air, constricting me, pulling my limbs. Despite having searched everywhere for a key, I cannot find it, let alone a lock to pick. It has swallowed me, replacing me with it. Despite all attempts of resistance, the water has pushed me down, and I'm choking on the liquid.
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
Screaming, yelling, betrayal –
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
Explosions. Lots of explosions. And a break, a large, large break – smash – the room shook –
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
The blinded area turned into light, and it wasn't like I was blinded anymore. With the new light, I tried to focus, but everything was twisted, because all I saw externally was black, and all I felt inside was black; and it knew that there was a chance to escape. It knew that it's time had come, and there was nothing, in its opinion, that could stop what was to come to the world; it was –
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
The air was fresh and new, dulling the infection. The air travelled to every part of my body, weakening the hold that it had on me. I had air, and I was above the water line once again, able to breathe and see clearly. And my chained body was unlocked and released, and I fell through the dark, poisoned water again. It went through my skin again and hurriedly ate away at what was left. It went to it inside of me, and it again began to spin out of control.
Spinningoutofcontrolspinningoutofcontrol.
And my thoughts were no longer mine.
Spinningoutofcontroloutofcontrol.
The world is mine.
