She didn't notice on her first time, as she skimmed the books and somehow knew just were everything would be. She didn't find it odd because she never second guessed the order of his books. But on her second time coming back, when he was visiting Luke and she was in New York, looking for just a small piece of him. Looking for answers to questions she didn't know. She found that maybe her heart was right.

She breathed in the scent of books. Old and new, it almost brought tears to her eyes. Books held memories for her and most reminded her of him. As she stepped farther in to Truncheon books, she let the door close behind her. A guy at the counter looked up from him computer. "Hello." Rory just nodded to him, smiling as he nodded once back and put his head back down to look at his computer. "If you need any help you can ask but I doubt I can help. I don't organize the books." Rory laughed and nodded, walking to the back shelves first. She skimmed along the books, her hand brushing the spines. She took note of the books that were placed side by side. She recognized the pattern almost immediately, it was the same way she organized her books at home. She quickly started scanning the books, looking for one in particular, she breathed deeply at the two books leaning against each other, a small space just big enough for one book unfilled. She pulled a book from her back pocket and carefully slid it into the space, the guy from the counter was looking at her curiously and she couldn't breathe. Rory tucked the book under her arm.

"Do you happen to have a post it?" The guy nodded, handing her a stack of blue post-its and a pen. "Thank you." She leaned on the table to write a quick note.

I'm sorry that I couldn't see just how much you wanted to help me. I see now you are the only one who has ever really been there for me. I'm sorry you had to go, and I'm sorry you never got the chance to say goodbye. But maybe we were never as good at talking. But I just wanted you to know that you were the only one I could ever talk to. I guess I just wanted to say goodbye. And thank you.

P.s. Keep writing, I can't wait to read more.

It took both sides of a post it note of her tiny scrawling handwriting, and still she felt it was insignificant. She put the post it note on top of the book, before looking up at the guy behind the counter once more. "Can you please tell me where Jess Mariano's desk is?" This got the guy to raise an eyebrow questioningly, but he stayed quiet and just pointed to a desk in the far corner. She wasn't surprised, his desk was covered in books, with stacks on both sides, and he had spiral notebooks, some lying half open that were filled with what she knew was his hand writing. Most however was scratched out in angry black lines. It almost made tears come to her eyes. She knew she shouldn't but she ran her eyes over a page and almost successfully read threw the mark outs and she sighed sadly. She grabbed the pen from beside the notebook and wrote one quick note.

Not all stories have happy endings, write about what you know.

She placed her copy of Howl on his desk, after kissing the torn cover one more time. Maybe this time it would really be good bye.