A/N: Yeah, so *SPOILERS* for S5 but, uh, Lapis left.

She's probably my favourite side character, and while her leaving was completely understandable and in-character, it still hurt.

Here's a thing.

I really hope they have Lapis since Escapism at some point.

Also I imagine Peridot and Lapis as Moirails, to use a Homestuck term.

DISCLAIMER: Steven Universe belongs to Rebecca Sugar.


Glittering sorrow


It's quiet, in space.

She had missed the solace; the gentle swaying of vast stars encircled by planets and other such masses, drifting so slowly in their swift dance.

But she also missed the solace of Earth.

It's not quite, but hushed. A breeze swaying stalks and crops and grass - or the pittering of rainfall upon the wooden hull and tin roof of the barn.

The light that entrapped and changed the world throughout the day, and even in the night when it's diminished presence left of softly-tightening shroud.

She missed Earth.

She missed home.

Periodot's eager eyes, head and heart equally eager for the endless curiosities of the world. Pumpkin's excited yips and caperings. Steven's Kindness, and, well, Stevenness.

But should couldn't. Never again will she be caught up in some stupid war.

It didn't mean that leaving it - and them - all behind didn't hurt. But she felt she couldn't bring herself to actually care as much as she wanted to think.

Maybe she really was broken. Beyond her cracked gem being entrapped.

Dust-

Gem dust-

Shards of shatterings, the crrrk! of a fracture and screams, sobbings-

A twisted product to save a friend and prevent a war; m a la ch i-t-e-

Lapis shook her head, hair fluffing out messily. She drew her knees up from the loose, depressed sprawl she had been sitting in, clasping her hands as though trying to stop herself from breaking any further. She sat on the roof of the barn, but a normal, swaying breeze was absent.

"I can't go through another war," she breathed out softly, the sentence drifting to silence amongst the star-dusted void. "I'm sorry Steven. . . Peridot. . ."

A shuddering breath.

"I can't."

Tears feel like little jewels, sparkling with the light of neighboring stars.