3:22pm.
"Please, Lil," James whined as he bounced his almost-15 month old son on his hip. "Thirty minutes, max. I had to ask Pete to leave his mom to buy us bread last week. I haven't felt so useless since... since forever."
"Dumbledore still has your cloak," Lily sighed, clearly frustrated. "I know you hate being cooped up here, I don't like it either. But it's just too dangerous."
"I know, but come on. I can handle myself."
Lily bit her lip and sighed once more. He had been getting more and more on her nerves lately, and she really couldn't put up with much more.
"Only thirty minutes, please James," she huffed. "That's all, and see if Sirius will go with you or something."
James' face split into a wide grin as he lifted Harry up above his head, blew a raspberry into his son's stomach where his shirt rode up causing him to emit a shrill giggle, and said, "Daddy'll be back kiddo. Mom's letting him out of his confines for a 'mo."
"Send a Patronus to Sirius," Lily said as she tried to hide her smile, taking her son from an over excited James.
He had already taken off up the stairs of their temporary home, a secluded property on the outskirts of Cornwall, but still yelled a muffled "Doing it now, Love."
… … … … …
October 23, 1981. 4:25pm. Somewhere in Cornwall, England.
"Where is he, Harry?" Lily murmured, worried that her husband hadn't showed up after his allotted thirty minutes. Really, he should be back. He promised, and she knew that he would honour it while they were in their current situation. In addition, she just had a feeling. And it was a very bad one, at that. Harry babbled at her, occasionally tugging on the ends of her red hair as she kept a steady eye on the front window with a clear view of the apparition point. The tension that had immediately engulfed the air the second James received Sirius' giant brute of a Patronus and left the building she refused to call their home was interrupted by the aforementioned Patronus.
"Trypsin's Point, immediately. Bring Harry. I'll get your stuff later."
Sirius' deep voice echoed in the small living room, causing Lily's heart to drop and Harry to look around wildly and let out a stream of "Pafoos". She scooped up her son who still glanced around, no longer babbling but now sported a frown on his young face, grabbed the bag at the door with a few of Harry's things in it, and jogged to the apparition point.
Holding her son securely against her chest and murmuring words of safety and assurance, Lily closed her eyes and pictured the beautiful hillside that she knew James' father named after his old blood hound. When she reopened her eyes she was greeted with quite the site: a lovely blue sky encasing the brilliant green grass running into mountainous cliffs, and her husband, lying on the ground, with blood escaping from multiple wounds along the length of his body with their friend leaning over him, tending to the injuries. Forgetting all of the training and constant vigilance Alastor had drilled into them, Lily ran to them without a second thought for any identity questions or the like. Sirius plucked Harry out of her arms as she dropped to James' side, whispering incantations to pick up where Sirius had left off.
"Sorry, Love, guess I can't handle myself like I thought," he gurgled through a punctured lung.
"You weren't home in your allotted time, don't think you can get away with this 'cause you're hurt," Lily tried to joke, but worry still clouded her words. "What happened? How did they find you?"
James pushed himself up into a sitting position once the majority of his injuries had been tended to. He grabbed her hand softly and sent a significant look of warning to Sirius, who simply pressed his lips together. James knew what he wished to say, but he was also aware that Sirius knew that neither of them would appreciate him sprouting off his long fought off theories at this moment.
"Someone must have said something, we've been there for a few months now, word had probably spread we were in the West Country, and it must have snowballed from there."
"So what are we going to do now?"
Both James and Lily sat in silence until they looked over to their friend who was now playing peek-a-boo with Harry, but still throwing them inconspicuous looks saying, Hurry the fuck up here.
"Do you think it's time to be completely hidden now?"
After a brief silence with no response from James, Sirius glanced over only to realize that Lily was looking directly, and speaking, at him. He suddenly realized why, of course, as when it was first discussed between the three of them and Dumbledore, James had already asked that Sirius be the Secret-Keeper. Taking a moment to spare a glance for his best friend, and noticing the slightly saddened and look of acceptance flit across his face, Sirius answered.
"Yeah Lil, I think it's time... and I think we should do it now. I know what you're going to say, that we should wait for Dumbledore, but we just simply might not have enough time for that. We don't know if the Death Eaters have traced us to this location yet, or if they're close. Lily, you're excellent at charms, and I know for a fact that you've researched it. I also have on good authority that you've performed it before as well.
"Furthermore," he continued with a slight increase in volume, to prevent Lily from trying to object with half-hearted lies in compliance with her own duties to the Order. "I was present for the last meeting, unlike the two of you, and Dumbledore is busy, with what I'm not sure. But he can't be reached until the thirtieth. He left McGonagall in charge of the school. And I know we could try and get Flitwick, but like I said, there might be no time to spare right now. We need to act fast."
The end of Sirius' speech was punctuated with silence from everyone but Harry who was squiggling around in the arms of his Godfather.
"Calm down, yeh' antsy sprog," he muttered, trying to rearrange him into a more comfortable position.
"Alright," James said in a voice that was barely stronger than it had been since he was ambushed at the market, and subsequently saved by Sirius. "He's right, Lily, we need to do it now. I'll be the Secret-Keeper – Sirius, I know I asked you, but I don't know if anyone, er, unsavory, has heard about that conversation between then and now – and you, Lily, can cast the charm. Sirius will be the only one who will know for now, until we can talk to Dumbledore. He's supposed to check in on us on the first of the month like normal. We'll have Sirius tell him the gist of it and I'll have to apparate to Hogwarts or something to give him the secret. I'll figure it out. I shouldn't write it down on parchment, just in case –"
Lily finally interrupted James' rambling thought process and Sirius' nodding with a vehement shake of her head. "Not like that you can't, sorry, Love. You're injured, and my healing job isn't quite up to scratch. If we're doing this now, you can't be the Secret-Keeper, it'll take too much out of you right now, and you'll probably faint before I'm done with the first incantation. But the rest is good; we'll have to figure it out in the next few days."
"She's right, James."
"No need to sound so morbid and upset by that, Sirius," Lily commented sarcastically, but then quickly changed her tone. "Unless, er – of course if you've changed your mind, then we'll –"
"No, Lil, I would be honoured to be your Secret-Keeper, really," Sirius interrupted quickly, before she continued on. He didn't want them to think badly of what he was going to say, but he also definitely didn't want them to realize his secondary motive, until, at least, it was already done. "What if – and just hear me out on this, before you say anything. But what if you used Pete instead? Like I said before, I would do it in a heartbeat. But I think this is better. Smarter."
"Why's that?" James questioned, honestly bewildered and only slightly saddened by the prospect that Sirius was backing out. "I mean, I love Pete and all, but why him?"
"Because Sirius is obvious," Lily inserted, as it dawned on her. "He's the obvious choice, and Voldemort knows that. Everybody knows that. It's not safe for him."
"Remember what Dumbledore said?" Sirius added as he nodded along with Lily's commentary, glad that she was being receptive to the idea, even if that wasn't his only reason. "He didn't want me to do it, and I mean, sure he could think I'm the one leaking information, but he just seemed to not like the obviousness of the choice. Even if he were the Keeper, while it wouldn't necessarily surprise people, it's not like someone is going to try to apprehend him. Also, Pete hasn't been helping out with the Order lately 'cause of his mom, right? So him not engaging in any missions wouldn't really raise an alarm, where I would. Well, I'll go into hiding too, but they'll think it's me then, see? They wouldn't even consider it to be Pete. He can go into hiding right away, take his mom with him, and stay safe. And you'll be safe."
James nodded at Sirius' idea and accepted it to be the best, most logical course of action in this short amount of time. "Okay," he said. "Get Peter here now, and we'll do it."
Sirius finally handed off Harry – who mercifully fell asleep throughout their decision-making process – back to his mother, and shook his wand out of his sleeve into his hand. While he conjoured his Patronus, James smiled at his wife and said, "Well, looks like we need a new place to stay. And since we'll be under the Fidelius, perhaps Godric's Hollow?"
She merely chuckled and shook her head at his words. "James, in the moment that I considered the charm, I knew you had already come to that conclusion. That's why we're here, aren't we?" She gestured to the general area with a slight smile and an eye roll. "It's relatively close to the property your family owned there –"
"We own there," he corrected. "And I only considered it because that's where you said that you could actually picture us raising a family."
"Yes, well –"
Lily's happy words were cut off by the distinct crack of apparition, causing her to quickly spin around, wand at the ready in one hand, child in the other. Sirius' actions mirrored hers from a small distance away. He marched up to the man who had just appeared with his wand arm stretched out and a slight squint to his eyes in marked cautiousness.
"How did you find out Padfoot's favourite thing to eat?"
"When I walked into our dorm when no one was supposed to be back, only to find you transformed, eating a plate of sardines," Peter answered, his lip twitching only slightly and his wand pointed at his friend's chest in a direct imitation. "How did you wake me up on our last day of Hogwarts?"
"I yelled in sadness about how upset I was to leave," Sirius grumbled quietly. "And I thought I said that was an off-limits question?"
"I'm sorry; I thought you said 'yelled in sadness'. I'm pretty sure you cried."
"It was a single tear, you twerp," Sirius replied with a slight scowl, trying to ignore his other two friend's snickers.
"Right, so," Peter said, looking around at the scene, at once noticing the bloodied ground. "So, since we're not near Cornwall any more, clearly, and your Patronus said it was urgent, what's going on?"
"Lily's casting the Fidelius Charm. And you're going to be the Secret-Keeper, yeah?" Sirius said to Peter, more as a statement than a question. "We've thought it out, and this is the best bet in such a short amount of time. You can go into hiding with your mom, and I'll stick around close, let Dumbledore know what's basically going on. You'll have to be available so that you can give him the secret, though. Then we'll – or Dumbledore will – wipe any traces of you. No one, especially Voldemort, will be able to find you."
"Er, yeah, okay," Peter said, nodding his head, his eyes darting between the three of his friends. Oh shit, he thought. He tried to calm himself down. He knew what would happen after all of this. Thankfully, Sirius was helping James sit up and Lily was tending to Harry, so none of them notice Peter go into a slight catatonic stupor. Shaking his head to try and rid the barrage of thoughts that seemed to flood his brain all at once, he attempted to maintain his composure. You can't tell them anything now. You're in far too deep… You're on the winning side now, Pettigrew. Just keep telling yourself that. They'll kill you, if you don't continue to help Him. They'll kill your helpless mother. You're branded.
"Pete, you ready?" Lily asked, smiling over at him, with a face full of trust and bravery that caused him to let out a visible wince, no matter how hard he tried to hold it in. She frowned slightly, and he was disheartened to see that it only held compassion with no trace of betrayal.
You can't tell them. Just go through with this. Be brave, even if it is in the wrong sense.
"Sorry, yeah I'm fine. I just don't know what to expect, yeh know?"
"It'll only tingle a bit, really. Just try and keep yourself open, and close your eyes. It'll help you focus, okay?" She waited for him to nod, and to close his eyes. "Right, okay. I just need you to picture James, Harry, and myself. That's all you got to do."
With his eyes shut and his mind receptive, he pictured the day after Harry was born. All four of the Marauders were gathered 'round Lily's bed, all of whom took turns holding him. He internally shuddered at the last image he was seeing, the one he tried to keep at the forefront of his mind, of James gently passing his sleeping, barely-a-day-old son with a tuft of unruly black hair to his wife, who was looking up at James with the utmost love.
… … … … …
[AN]
I haven't written anything for a long time now, but this popped into my head today, and I couldn't get it out. Many people have wondered "Why didn't James or Lily just be the Secret-Keeper?" "How did they not tell Dumbledore at all about the switch?" "How..." blah blah. I've asked myself these questions too, and I thought this up today. And it kinda made sense, so I went with it.
Just a few things though. Some of it's head canon. But most of it I find may be partially common sense, but it's magic anyways. Like with the Fidelius charm bit not working on James because he's injured. I mean, that's completely possible. It's a "highly complex spell" and therefore must require a lot of energy on both the caster & recipient's side. And I looked at the lexicon, and there's no incantation for it. Or process. So I made all that up. But I digress...
ALSO, it broke my heart to leave Remus out of this. I love the guy so much, but it would make no sense for so many reasons to have him in here. But he's kind of mentioned in a round-about, Sirius-not-trusting-him way a couple of times (& the marauder memory type of thing at the end, but that hardly counts.)
Anyways, let me know what you think! And if you find any grammatical/spelling/situational problems in here, let me know!
