ShakespeareIsMyMuse

DISCLAIMER: I, ShakespeareIsMyMuse, do so solemnly swear that I do not own Hawaii Five-0 or any of its affiliates, which includes: any familiar story plots, creation of original characters belonging to the show, cast and crew. Rights, property and ownership belong rightfully and wholly to CBS and its Original Creator: Leonard Freeman (1920-1974), also to reboot creators: Peter M. Lenkov, Alex Kurtzman, and Roberto Orci.

I, ShakespeareIsMyMuse, do however claim ownership of any unrecognizable characters and the formation of plot(s) that follows. Any invention or similarity of any character or plot line that is seen here after represented really or fictitiously, alive or dead, is purely coincidental and unintentional.

*Exhales* I hope that about covers everything. *Cracks Neck* Now, on with the story.

Enjoy.

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

Summary: The dictionary definition of the word surprise is "a brief mental and physiological state; a startle response experienced as the result of an unexpected event". Although some might define a surprise as something that you didn't even know you wanted, until you finally got it.

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

Chapter I: A Man Walks into a Bar…

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

Following his sister's new found life plan that included motherhood, his ex-girlfriend's— Catherine— departure from his life, his aging, cancer battling, Aunt Deb's nuptials and his final show down with his arch nemesis, Wo Fat; Steve McGarrett decided to take a piece of advice offered to him by his 'alternate reality' Danno —"A wife and a daughter; a family, it's really the best man, you should try it sometime,"— and settle down.

About six months after the "Columbia Thing" where his best friend's baby brother— Matt Williams— had turned up dead, and the "Wo Fat Thing" where Steve McGarrett had almost turned up dead, and those extremely chaotic moments because of the "Columbia Thing" where "the shit" had hit the fan in a real monumental way and Danny Williams had very nearly ended up dead; it happened.

Steve and Danny had been having a drink at a new bar that had just opened up, smack, dead center in downtown Honolulu. Danny's girlfriend, Amber Vitale— whose real name was Melissa Armstrong, a battered woman who ran all the way to Hawaii to escape her abusive, now soon to be ex-husband, but nowadays preferred to be called by her new name—had, after said incident wanted yet another change in her life, taken a brand new job as a cocktail waitress there.

"Here you are gentlemen," Amber said setting down two pint sized elegant crystal mugs—filled to the brim with deep orange liquid "It's a pumpkin spice blend; House specialty."

Steve nodded in approval of the taste, while Danny swallowed, "Mmm, delicious."

Amber smiled as she leaned over the bar. "Is it just the brew you like or do you like watching me walk around in this sequin leotard mini skirt?"

An impish grin crossed the detective's face, "Both."

She faked leaning in to steal a kiss to instead tap Danny on the nose before winking and walking away.

"That sparkly little number gets a lot of use off the clock, doesn't it?" Steve wondered.

Danny didn't say anything—he just sat there leaning up on his elbow chewing on his thumbnail—, but then again he didn't have to; the look on his face said it all. An amused smile crossed Steve's face as he playfully whacked his partner in the arm. Danny's impish grin had returned, as he was jostled by Steve's motion—but he made no retaliation; instead the two swung around in their high bar stools and looked out over the massive crowd that had piled into the new locale.

Amber had invited the guys to check the place out and had secured for them—what were undoubtedly— the best seats in the whole house.

During the course of the night, one of the bar's patrons had over indulged himself to the point of complete and utter obnoxiousness. Butting in on a conversation that had absolutely nothing to do with him and finding himself teasing—in no pleasant way—Steve and Danny about their relationship and "marital status".

At first the patron had been ignored by many, including those of Five-0— who had suggested the bartender cut him off and call him a cab. However, when the liquor sodden man had lost his balance during his protests at the stem of spirits and used another female patron's bosom as a means of steadying himself; well that was the proverbial straw that had broken the camel's back. Danny had pulled out his handcuffs and told the man that he was under arrest for drunk and disorderly conduct and sexual harassment.

The former charge wasn't necessarily binding; it was more just to get the guy away from the public and from consuming more booze in order to sober up. Allow the shame to sink in, so to speak while sleeping it off in the drunk-tank.

The latter, however, as Steve explained to the clearly offended woman was entirely up to her. Should she decide to press charges, the man would be charged with sexual harassment in conjunction with public intoxication.

It was then the intoxicated patron decided to –drunkenly— fight "the man" and took a haphazard swing at Danny, who deftly ducked it. Steve tried—in vain— to steady the man currently spinning around on his heel. But he was so off kilter that he had lost all control of his legs –and his bladder— as both buckled out from beneath him.

The drunkard –one hundred and eighty pounds, easy— passed out sideways onto an unsuspecting Amber carrying a full tray of drinks. Poor Amber, in her glittering sequined leotard dress, and her back to the scene, fell face forward – drinks and all— onto a beautiful unsuspecting redheaded woman who had just walked through the bar's front door.

"Oh my God!" was the collective cry of the women who had been standing behind her, waiting to follow her into the establishment.

Leaving the passed out drunk on the floor, Danny and Steve had immediately rushed forward to offer assistance. The Detective successfully managed to pull his girlfriend to her feet and check her over, while Steve knelt down next to the pretty redhead who was laid out flat on her back.

"No, no, stay down, lie still, you've hit your head; you might have a concussion. Can you tell me your name?" Steve asked as he watched Danny dial for an ambulance.

"Oh, her name is…" a woman with a bride's veil with glittery hot pink rhinestones attached to flashing equally hot pink tiara started to say.

"Uh uh," Steve wagged his finger in protest, "I need her to tell me her name; I need you to tell me if she's right."

"Oh, okay," the woman nodded.

"Uh…um…Ana…Anastacia Carducci," she told him.

Steve glanced up at the woman in the flashing tiara— did a superb job at keeping the surprise off of his face at the sight her in her glittery flashing head piece — and watched as she nodded yes.

"Well, hello Ana, my name is Steve."

"Hi, Steve, listen I'm fine." Ana groaned a bit as she rubbed her head for a second, before semi-propping herself up on her elbows with a little assistance from her girlfriends. Finally managing to take stock of what happened enabled her to study the very attractive man next to her with cavernous absorption.

"Ana, you should really lay back down," he told her as he ran his fingers behind her head—obviously checking for lumps and lacerations.

Ana felt warm just at his touch and for the briefest second thought about how she really wouldn't mind laying back down if he were lying on top of her. And for the rest of her life she will forever wonder if that's what made her repeat one of Mae West's most famous lines, "Is that a pistol in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?" The words poured from her mouth shamelessly and then in the second that followed her silence she immediately gasped, shook her head and covered her face in embarrassment.

Several of her girlfriends either giggled, chuckled or flat out laughed from behind her. Even Danny craned his neck around Amber's form to stare at the woman for a second before exchanging a look with his girlfriend.

"Oh my God," she said from behind her hand—positively mortified. "I am so sorry. I have absolutely no idea why I just said that. Oh, God, you're right, I should lie back down. I think I do have a concussion."

Glancing down, Steve realized that—somehow— in the scuffle with the plastered man a couple of belt loops on his cargo pants had torn, causing his gun holster to slide way forward on his hip. Though he kept his composure, Steve felt some measure of warmth skirt beneath the skin of his cheeks.

It was probably one of the oldest, cheesiest lines out there; yet somehow it had flattered him and he felt something swell deep in his chest. It was a feeling he had never once recalled feeling before. It was new and different…special and it made him feel like a peacock; just dying to splay his feathers for show.

"Actually, it is my pistol…well, technically it's a SIG, not a pistol…a SIG-Sauer P226," Steve affirmed, as he pushed it back, a smile slowly beginning to curl on his lips. With his free hand, he tugged his badge loose from his belt and held it up for her to see. "My full name is Lieutenant Commander Steven Johnathan McGarrett formerly of the United States Navy …current head of the Governor's Five-0 Task Force. …Not that you aren't fully capable of flattering a man, I'm sure…well actually, I'm not, but why wouldn't you be? …ma'am." His smile was full now.

"Oh?" Ana had a smile of her own, though it was still somewhere between embarrassed and flattered.

Danny smirked and had to stifle a snort, especially when Amber lightly tapped him on the cheek in chastisement. However, he wasn't doing it to be mean, he truly found the situation both humorous and exultant.

After the year his buddy had had, he was finally glad to see something on his face other than laser focus determination and a thirst to either shoot or blow an object or two to hell. Plus, he also found it hilarious that a man who excelled—usually at the top of his class—at everything else was pretty much anything but subtle when it came to flirting; and it looked like the pretty redhead was in the same boat.

"Yeah, that's my partner," Steve pointed to Danny, "Danny um…uh…" he snapped his fingers impatiently.

"Williams," Danny supplied; smirk firmly in place.

"…Williams and that's his girlfriend, Amber, uh... Amber," he stuttered suddenly at a loss for Amber's last name—which he was more than positive he had known when he had walked into the bar.

"Vitale." Amber helped him out this time; as Danny was now literally biting his tongue to stop himself from laughing. Flustered was an unusual color on his partner.

"…Vitale," Steve repeated with a nod.

Ana's eyes flicked over long enough to see the two blondes, give a slight wave and smile at them before her big doe brown eyes locked once more with the sparkling blue orbs of Five-0's Commander. As soon as she was positive Ana—or Steve— was no longer looking, Amber buried her face into Danny's shoulder to muffle the sounds of her laughter; knowing full well that this behavior was far from the norm of Steve McGarrett.

"These are my friends…" Ana started to say, but was quickly cut off.

"Trish," one of the women said.

"Sherri," said another.

"Bree," the third one responded.

"Kim," said the one wearing the tiara.

"Erin…," said the last, pointing to the woman next to her, "…we're celebrating Kim's bridal shower."

Well, at least the glitter coated hot pink flashing veiled tiara now made sense.

"Ladies," he acknowledged with a nod, without once breaking eye contact with Ana; both of them still smiling.

But that was back then…

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

Muse's Notes:

I was working on a couple of my other Five-0 stories—and admittedly, was not getting very far— when this assortment of what is apparently going to be several divvied up chapters just popped into my head. It wouldn't leave me alone, so I typed it out. I am hoping that this was just what I needed to bring an end to my writer's block. Wish me luck.

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50

-It is with a light and open heart, along with a great deal of anticipation that you, my reader, enjoy my work, just as with all my writing, it really means a great deal to me.

-Reviews and/or constructive criticism are not required here, but are always welcome.

-Flames are not required nor are they welcome; and while I cannot stop you from posting them, I will warn you, I usually don't take them to heart.

Love, Hugs, and Kisses,

Muse.