"Hurry, we're losing her," Dr. Minamino yelled in a quicken voice, his voice muffled by his operation mask. "I need some epinephrine and liquid aspirin, STAT!"
"Right away, sir," responded one of the nurses.
"You think she will pull through this?" pondered Dr. Yung.
"I am praying that she does. She's Kyoshin's kid. I'd hate to break the news to him if she didn't pull through." "Come on Kiki, you can do this. Please pull through," pleaded Dr. Minamino.
"We've put the drugs in her, but there is no sign of improvement. She's fading fast," replied the nurse.
"We can't give up on her, Anita, we have to try anything. I don't care what it is; she has to pull through. She's only five years old. We just celebrated her birthday, Saturday. This is Tuesday. She must pull through."
"She's flat-lining. We need the paddles, STAT!" shouted a female doctor.
"Give me those, Dr. Kotuku," demanded Minamino, "On a count of three, one two three." Kiki's body pulses off the table. "Come back to us, Kiki, please! Come on! Megumi and Saito need their playmate back. That's you. Please come on!" he pleaded.
He rubbed the beads of sweat that were forming a ring around his cyan hairnet with one of his gloved wrists. Suddenly he heard a soft whisper in his ears. "Hey Kurama, almost didn't recognize you there. We have her in our care."
"Who's we?" He glanced at the lavender eyes of a familiar blue-haired woman. "Botan, can't you see we are trying to get her to come back. I have no time for this."
"Hinageshi is here too, we're here to take her home. There's nothing you can do, I'm sorry."
"She's gone, but she was just here!" he exclaimed in a distraught voice.
"Sorry sir, there's nothing more we can do, except inform her parents and console them for their loss," apologized Dr. Yung. "Do you want me to tell them, or do you want to?"
"You do what you want, man," Kurama sighed, "I'll just be in my office. You can inform her parents." He sighed deeply and looked up at the black-haired man. "I've got to make a couple phone calls, and I want time to think." He looked at Botan, "Hey when you are done with Kiki, come by my office, a.s.a.p."
"Sure thing, sir," she sighed, looking away from him. He hastened out of the ER and headed down the hallway to the nurse's desk. "Hey, Betty, could you hold my calls for me? I'm going be in my office, but I want some downtime. I just lost a patient."
"I'm so sorry, doc. Sure I'll take your calls. By the way, you do have one from your wife."
"Thanks, I was going to call her anyways. Right now I'm going to the restroom, I haven't been since 5:30 this morning and it's almost noon."
He walked into the men's and saw a blond-haired doctor standing in front of a urinal. "Hey, Henson," he sighed in a dower voice. Kurama removed the hairnet from his head and combed his fingers through his long hair.
"Hey man, you look like hell," commented Henson as the red-haired man took his position beside him.
"I feel like I've been to hell. I've been through almost seven hours on a little girl fighting for her life. She lost the fight and now I've got to write her report."
"So sorry, Minamino. I know you take those things hard. So who was she?"
Kurama flushed the urinal and walked to the sink. He stared at himself in the mirror. He opened up the facet and splashed his face with cold water to disguise the tears rolling down his cheeks. "She uh…" he sniffed back the snot in his nose, trying to dislodge a lump in his throat. "She was one of my friends' kids. Kyoshin's." He looked up into Henson's eyes as he walked over to the sink, too.
"Isn't that the swimming coach for Seiko Elementary? Sorry, man, I know you treated Kiki like she was one of your own." Henson graced his arm over Kurama's shoulders, and the two men exchanged bear hugs. Henson patted Minamino on his back. Minamino made motions to leave and Henson drew back his arms.
"I've got to get into my office. I've got two calls to make and I'm expecting a visitor. She should be done with her job by now."
He found his office door, flung it open, and slammed it shut. He grabbed the mask off his face and smacked it against his desk. He paced back and forth, as if waiting on someone. He sat in his chair behind his desk and was about to dial his phone, when he heard his door knock.
"K-Kurama, may I come in?" asked Botan in a worried voice.
"Sure door's open," he said in a stern voice.
"What's the matter with all of you in Spirit World? Do you think this is some sort of game?" he screamed, smacking his hand against the top of the desk, as he whirled himself back in front of it and stared at her in the face.
"No, sir, this is no fun for me. You think I like taking people to our place, especially children that young? Koenma was saddened to hear this young girl was going up there today."
"But what is the deal?" he steamed, again pacing the floor. "You have this all-knowing plan, like you know who is going to die. Meanwhile I am busting my fucking balls down here, trying my hardest to save their lives. A man like me can only take so much, Botan, but I feel like you guys do nothing but make me feel like a fucking moron," he thundered, with his face turning as red as his hair.
"I understand your frustration," she said in a calm, yet firm voice, "Yusuke asked the very same question when he first died. But Kurama, you should know better than anybody else that that is the way things go sometimes. You've stared death in the face more than once in your life, you've even lost your mother and Yomi to it. But that is the natural order of things, that's why I have a job. My job is to escort people to the other side."
"But he has either you or Hinageshi to take the loved one away from their families and friends? It's neither fair for them nor the patient," he argued, as he leaned up against his desk with his arms crossed. "And this isn't just some little girl; this is Seaman's kid. Kiroki Kyoshin, or Kiki, is both Megumi and Saito's best friend. They'd always play at anyone of our houses. Plus this year Kiki's in Megumi's preschool class at Saranaski. Next year she was going to be sharing the class with Saito."
"I know who she was. I remember her from day one myself. I know she shared your birthday."
Kurama stared to calm down a bit, trying to cool off his own frustrations. "Well it's more than just she shared my birthday, Botan, I helped deliver her. You see, Mitarai and his wife, Yumi, were married a month after Yusuke and Keiko's wedding. For years since then they were trying to get pregnant. Then about when Megumi was born, Yumi announced she was pregnant. Everyone was so excited for her. After that, Yusuke, Kuwabara, and I took him out to Tsukihito's Bar to celebrate."
"Yes I know, your girlfriend at the time told me about it, right when we were waiting for Megumi to be born at Genkai's temple. Her brother said Mitarai and Yumi couldn't make it to the temple because Yumi was so sick, she couldn't say away from the toilet bowl for very long."
"Well fast forward to the next year, month after the accident, to my birthday, and we were all over at Shizuru's house, eating cake and drinking tea. I had gotten up to use the bathroom, and I came back to find Yumi suddenly go into labor. Her water had broken and this kid was coming out fast. Yusuke, Seaman, and Kuwabara helped her to Shizuru's guest bedroom. Meanwhile I filled the tub in the guest bathroom with lukewarm water. Yumi said she wanted a water birth. So we four guys put her in the tub. She pushed with all her might, as Seaman held her back for support. I held my hands under the water to catch the baby as she was coming. It wasn't maybe thirty minutes when we got Mrs. Kyoshin into the tub that little Kiroki popped out and greeted us all with a loud waah."
"Yeah that was a good night. I too was glad that she was in the world," she recalled.
Kurama sighed very deeply, trying to shake off the growing pain in his heart. He tried to swallow a lump in his throat, even trying to cough it out to no avail. "Well, two or three years ago, week after Christmas, Megumi and Kiki were at our house with both of their parents, admiring our new baby, Saito. Megumi and Kiki were playing out in the snow with Yusuke, when Kiki started shaking. Megumi thought she was just cold, but Yusuke brought Kiki inside to me. She wouldn't respond to anything, just shook out of control. He held her as still as possible, while he and I made a b-line to the hospital in his car. Everyone else, except for my wife, followed us close behind. Shizuru hung back, since she was a new mom and didn't want Saito to be out in the cold.
We arrived there and went straight to the E.R. After maybe ten minutes, we finally had Kiki sedated. Her doctor ran a physical on her, and found out she had epilepsy. Almost two years old, and she was hit with that prognosis. As you can imagine, Seaman and Yumi were shocked and devastated. They couldn't believe this news."
"That's what Koenma told me," Botan sighed, as she planted her butt on the back of a chair and crossed her legs. Kurama sat on his desk and looked at her, trying to wipe tears from his eyes. "Are you all right? I'm sorry; I know I shouldn't have asked that, after what happened just now."
"I'll be all right. It's these allergies I just get. Maybe the room is too dusty," he replied, trying to hide his emotions. Botan knew he was lying but didn't want to push the issue.
"So what happened? Did you do anything to help her improve?"
"We did. Well most of the time though, she seemed like a normal healthy kid. She was funny, curious, and spunky. On her second birthday, she was surprised with a service dog. He was the sweetest thing ever. He was big, but not too big for the Kyoshins to handle. He was a beautiful chocolate lab named Bobo. They had him shipped from the US to here in Japan. Actually he flew over. After awhile all four were inseparable. It was Megumi, Kiki, Saito and Bobo. He was good for Kiki. Whenever she would have a seizure, he would lay down beside her and put his big soft paws on her legs."
"Is Bobo still there, you speak of him in the past tense?" she wondered.
"That guy, of course, he's their son. The Kyoshins treat him as their kid, although I don't know for how long. Yumi is pregnant again. She found out last week that this one is a little boy. So I guess they will have two sons."
"So what happened this time?"
"We think that her prognosis wasn't getting any better. In fact, the seizures were coming too close together. Seaman told me, she was having trouble even holding water down. She was constantly vomiting, she couldn't control her own body, it was shaking violently. She was unable to breath properly. They rushed her in here, about midnight and we've been working on her ever since. I barely had time to get ready this morning. I rushed out at 5:30, got to the hospital. I ate a bagel and went to the restroom after I got here. I was in the E.R. at 5:45 and have been working nonstop trying to get her sedated. She suddenly went into arrest after 7:30. We've been trying to get her condition under control. She was calmed down from the sedatives and slept for an hour. Then at 9:00, she went under again with a seizure. At one point her heart stopped. We were able to shock her back to life. Then she was put on a respirator because she couldn't breath on her own. She was set for an hour and a half this time. Then about 11:20, she collapsed. That's when everything went south. Her pulse was dropping, fluid was building up around her lungs; she couldn't breath properly. Then she went into shock about the time you and Hinageshi showed up. We tried everything, but we were powerless. At 11:45, she was gone." He bit his lower lip and gazed down at his lap, where his fingers were folded into a ball. His eyes stared back at her then off into space, trying to blink the tears out of his eyes.
Botan stood up and walked over to him and placed her hand on his shoulder. "Do you mind if I hugged you?"
"Sure, I suppose. You are my best friend." He stood up and allowed her to embrace him in her arms. She slid her arms underneath his arms and enclosed them on his back.
"You can rest your head on my shoulders if you want to." He did as she permitted. He rested his head on her shoulders held her loosely around her back.
"Thank you, Botan, it's just like we've lost an angel. I can't believe that I'd be the same man who saw her come into the world would be the one who saw her leave. I thought it should be the other way around. I'm supposed to die before her." He drew back from her hastily the walked to a couch beside the door, and flopped onto the cushions. "Please close the door for me. I don't want anyone else seeing me right now." He sat hunched over with his elbows on his knees. Kurama rubbed his hands on his face, and then looked up at her with wet eyes.
She closed the door and sat down beside him. She held his hand and stroked it softly with hers. "I tried to save her, Botan," he said with his quivering lips, "I did everything I could. What should I have done differently? Was there anything that could have saved her? I would've done just about anything, even use my demonic powers."
Botan embraced him once again, letting his face fall into her shoulder. "There was nothing to do. You did everything possible. Koenma said he's proud of you everyday. You save countless lives. We like having fewer people in Spirit World, and that's due to wonderful and caring doctors like you. We know you tried to save her. You are a healer, but you aren't Enma. You are no god. And it's okay to get angry and frustrated at us up there. But that is because you are a caring person who likes for others to get better and feel better."
"But what does it matter? If I save a life, to you it just means I am doing nothing more than prolonging the inevitable." Tears poured from his eyes, as he buried his face into the top shoulders of her pink kimono. "Am I doing good, or giving into the void? What is the point of all of this? Where did I go wrong? Did I screw up and she's…or…" His voice trailed off into nothingness, as his breath became shallow and choked.
She held on to him tight, as much as she could and gently rubbed his back in slow circular motions. "It's okay. It matters plenty. You've done nothing wrong. You didn't screw up. Even if you did, you tried. You did your best. You held onto her until the end. You've always been there for her. You're there for Yusuke's kids and for your own."
"I-I just wish t-tha-a-a…Bot…" He became so choked up, that he couldn't speak. The weigh on his heart became so heavy that he couldn't hold back any longer. His tears gushed out of his eyes like a geyser, soaking Botan's kimono. "I just wish we had saved her," he whispered under a sodden voice. For the longest time she held onto him without a word. She combed her fingers through the back of his head while holding it against her body. He continued to weep, trying to muffle his own moans and sighs in the bodice of her kimono.
"I know you wish you had saved her. I wish she were alive too. Maybe there is a way to save her still."
"How can that be, she's dead? You know how it goes. First thing she will have a wake at her house. Then the day of the funeral, her body will be…will be…" he stuttered and mouthed the word burned, which made him sob even harder with his mouth gaping. Once again he buried his face into her shoulder.
"Maybe you can ask Mitarai and Yumi if they'd like to have her organs donated. Maybe to save the life of other children," Botan suggested, trying her best to comfort him.
"Yeah maybe, there is a little boy that is in desperate need of kidneys. His are bad and he's on a dialysis machine all the time. I think he's also her blood type, AB negative." He sighed heavily, trying to slow down the pace of his tears. "We…we also have a girl in need of a new heart, hers is malfunctioning, her doctor only gave her a few months to live otherwise. And we have a third who needs a new bladder and liver. He can't rid his body of toxins very well and he can't urinate regularly, because his bladder is close to rupture. He's hooked up a set of tubes and a machine that drain his ureters on a continuous basis." Kurama's face started returning to normal, as he tried to drain the tears from his eyes and dry off his face. He pulled away from Botan and stood up slowly. He looked down at her and offered his hands to hoist her back up. "I think Seaman would go for that. Would you like to join me?" She obliged and grabbed his hands. He opened the door for her and the two of them walked down the corridors to the Kyoshin's counsel room.
