Cornelius in Waffle Town
Chapter 1- Corndog meets Samson and Phoebe
Hey everybody. This is just a short random story about a mobility inspector called Cornelius that my friend Katie and I made up. As we are both IN LOVE with Harvest Moon we decided it would be funny to send him there XD. It may be quite hard for you to understand but let's just go with it. Enjoy.
One sunny day, shortly after a nuclear bomb had blown up in Waffle Town, a large ship pulled up in the dock and off stepped Cornelius Gulliver Smitten Sink the mobility/safety hazard inspector.
He wore a rather prim maroon suit to match his extremely dark brown, almost black hair, and had gelled his moustache so that it curled at each end.
As he began to walk along the empty streets of the small town he bumped into Mayor Hamilton who was rushing around in quite a fluster.
'Oh excuse me sir,' Cornelius said to the rather tubby little man 'Would you mind telling me where I could find the mayor of this town?'
The Mayor stared up at the rather gangly, tall, intimidating man and gulped.
'You're talking to him. How may I help you?'
Cornelius straightened his tie and crouched down slightly to the mayor's level.
'I'm here to inspect the damage left by the bomb.' He said
Hamilton's face lit up.
'Ah yes. We've been expecting you Mister….'
'Sink,' Cornelius finished 'Cornelius Gulliver Smitten Sink, but you can call me Corndog.'
Hamilton frowned.
'O-kay well most of the damage is actually on Toucan Island not far from here…you can take my speedy speed boat if you'd like?'
Cornelius perused the thought in his head for several moments before deciding that a trip in a nifty speed boat would really brighten up his day.
'Yeah, why not!' He said.
Hamilton smiled and led him over to a small, pristine white boat tied up on the other side of the ferry.
'Here's the keys.' He said dropping 2 small silver pieces of metal into Cornelius' hands 'Take care of my baby.'
Cornelius rolled his eyes.
'Of course my fine fellow.' He said jumping in and starting up the engine.
There was only one island in the inspectors view so he took it to be Toucan Island.
He jumped off the boat onto the sand and being Cornelius forgot to tie it up. As he began to look around hundreds of piranha fish devoured it.
The door of a nearby Inn opened and a rather tanned, large man with fuzzy reddish hair appeared.
'Hey! Who goes there?' Samson shouted.
Cornelius began to quiver with fear.
'I…I'm just inspecting….you know…the damage…' He stuttered.
Samson's expression enlightened as he approached the nervous mess Cornelius had become.
Cornelius feared for his life as the burly man got nearer and quickly pulled a hazard sticker out of his pocket and stuck it to Samson's forehead.
'What the…?' Samson said peeling the yellow sign off his brow.
Cornelius began to scream and run frantically in circles causing a sand cloud to arise.
'Freak!' Samson said picking up a coconut and throwing it at the bizarre man.
Cornelius stopped and rubbed his head.
'Hey, that was kind of sore.' He said.
Samson continued to throw coconuts at him and shout abuse. Selena then appeared out of the Inn.
'Dad! What are you doing?' She yelled running over to him and trying to hold him back.
Cornelius couldn't help but stare at the alluring belly dancer and unfortunately she noticed.
'Ugh, you perve!' She said running back into the Inn.
The mysterious panda then came along and arrested Samson for miss use of coconuts, but as he was being dragged away he threw one last one which banged of Cornelius' head and concussed him.
Then, as if by the magic of the Harvest Goddess, Jin appeared out of nowhere and took the dazed inspector back to the clinic.
As Cornelius lay asleep Jin poked his eyeballs…?
When he awoke he had a minor heart attack at the sight of Jin. Irene then brought him round…again.
Cornelius began to scream and frantically stuck hazard stickers all over Jin's face and then ran out of the clinic like a mad man.
As he sped down the streets he bumped into Gill who was mumbling away to himself about harvest sprites.
'Hey! Who the hell are you and why are you screaming?'
Cornelius began to scream even louder and then proceeded to stick hazard stickers all over Gill too.
Cornelius ran on past Gill towards Ganache Mine District where he finally calmed down.
Gill stormed along the streets in a rage yelling,
'That creep deflated my cow's lick with his screaming!'
In the distance Cornelius spied a young woman with emerald coloured hair, moulded perfectly into a bee hive like shape wearing an excavator's uniform.
He ran to catch up with the woman and stuck a hazard sticker on her back.
Phoebe jumped and turned to him repositioning her glasses and leaning over to get a good look at him.
'Who or what are you?' She said wrinkling up her nose.
'Cornelius Gulliver Smitten Sink!' He declared proudly 'But you can call me Corndog!' He winked at her.
The inspector gawked at Phoebe with his mouth gaping open.
Phoebe cleared her throat awkwardly.
'Well…shut your mouth you'll catch flies!' She snapped glancing around to make sure nobody was watching.
She then peeled the sticker of her back and held it up closer to her face to read it.
'And why did you stick this to me?' She said confusedly.
Cornelius sleeked back his hair and tried to be cool.
'Because you're a fire hazard baby!'
Phoebe put her hand over her mouth to stop herself throwing up.
'Hey are you from Jamaica? Cause you're Jamaican me crazy!'
'Oh…Please stop with the cheesy lines! You're just embarrassing yourself! And no I'm not Jamaican!'
She folded her arms and turned away from him.
'Oh…well are you sure you're not even…a teeny bit Jamaican?' He said running his finger along her shoulder blade.
She turned sharply and slapped him away.
'NO! Now piss off before my boyfriend Calvin comes and beats the shit out of you, punk!' Cornelius was taken back at her harsh words and turned around walking straight into what seemed to be a brick wall.
'WHAT are you doing harassing my girlfriend?' A deep voice said.
Cornelius turned back into his shivering bundle of nerves.
'N-n-n-n-nothing s-sir.' He stuttered holding his hand out slightly to shake Calvin's hand.
'Oh no…' Calvin said clenching his fist and punching Cornelius straight in the eye. Calvin put his arm around Phoebe and walked on leaving Cornelius to squirm and cry on the ground.
Well…that's the end of chapter 1. It was…strange but everybody's allowed to have 1 weird story…right? Well anyway I'm sure Katie would appreciate it if you reviewed and I'm sure it would make Cornelius feel a lot better,
Me: Right Cornelius?
*Cornelius sit's in the corner with an ice pack on his head and an eye patch on*
Cornelius: Why did you have to send me to that awful town? I was having a great time living at my old house in Katie and your minds. It was a lot nicer there!
Me: You'll get over it. Plus you get to meet Luke next! Yay!
Cornelius: Oh joy of joys! Another dude that'll probably physically abuse me in some way.
Me: Okay Cornelius that's enough now.
Thanks again guys. More to come soon :)
